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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|

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umop_3pisdn said:
I think it's partly because homosexuality will likely always be something of a 'fringe' sexuality. Being only recently accounted for within society we sort of have carte blanche to work within the confines of what we're Ok with, instead of being so concerned about things like propriety. Accepting ourselves as gay is already one such transgression, of a kind, so maybe it makes later ones easier? I think we're perhaps more likely to have a kind of natural 'iconoclasm' in regards to sex, and perhaps other things.
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That too.
Is like straight guys that enjoy anal stimulation. They're not as open to talk about it, because of the stigma associated with "wut I'm not gay lol"; but they're there. Like with the "golden showers" it seems more common to associate it with gay men, as they're more open to talk about it; but it's well known that many straight couples do so.
 
So i've always had this thing of not being attracted to Filipino guys (im Filipino), but there's this guy i've recently met and he's fiiiiiiiiiine. He's kind of a bad boy though....something i'm not too sure of, as i've only talked to "good" guys should i pursue him gaf?
 
ciD_Vain said:
So i've always had this thing of not being attracted to Filipino guys (im Filipino), but there's this guy i've recently met and he's fiiiiiiiiiine. He's kind of a bad boy though....something i'm not too sure of, as i've only talked to "good" guys should i pursue him gaf?
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Depends on what "bad" boy really means; if he's a cheater, run for the hills. But if he puts on a show and can back it up in the bedroom, then hop on his motorcycle, light up a cig, and ride into the sunset.
Or just ask him out for coffee.
 
SecretMoblin said:
Depends on what "bad" boy really means; if he's a cheater, run for the hills. But if he puts on a show and can back it up in the bedroom, then hop on his motorcycle, light up a cig, and ride into the sunset.
Or just ask him out for coffee.
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im not so sure, but I can sense some sort of roughness from him, but it weirdly makes me more attracted to him. no coffee date, but he is taking me to disneyland next week so thats pretty cute ^_^
 
ciD_Vain said:
im not so sure, but I can sense some sort of roughness from him, but it weirdly makes me more attracted to him. no coffee date, but he is taking me to disneyland next week so thats pretty cute ^_^
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Why is he taking you to Disneyland?
 
HappyPuppy said:
Hey members of gaygaf, what is one of the most daring things you have done for another man/woman.
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I tried to steal someone else's boyfriend LOL. I regret nothing though, it was fun while our "thing" lasted.
 
SpaceBridge said:
Hey guys. What'd I miss?
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Not much actually. Thread has been slow today (probably because of the 3DS Ambassador Games been out earlier..except in Europe :p)

ciD's going to Disney with his new boy!! XD!! He's growing up! *sniff*

SaintZ said:
I tried to steal someone else's boyfriend LOL. I regret nothing though, it was fun while our "thing" lasted.
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:p
 
Most daring thing i have ever done for a guy...well nothing yet. Spending a crap ton of money to see him will be my most daring thing i will do.
 
SaintZ said:
I tried to steal someone else's boyfriend LOL. I regret nothing though, it was fun while our "thing" lasted.
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i don't think you can truly call yourself a gay man unless you have at least considered this and/or had it happen to you by accident
 
HappyPuppy said:
@Jezan

Man, I really enjoyed your tech/impulsive/funny/door slamming story. I'm interested if you would like to share, what kind of relationship you guys ended with. You seem like you are friends with they guy :D .

*Pets Sseklebeast
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We are friends, we were together some time, but he cheated on me and I was too clingy, I learned not to be clingy and told him that it might have been my fault that he cheated (since I'm annoying :P) and told him we get pretty nice as friends , we are not good bf material for each other, different views about the relationship, so now we are awesome friends now.
 
Feeling kinda sad today. Anxiety over the future. Feel like Im getting old, and life is running me by. Stuck in the same job, dont get out much anymore, lost contact with friends, feel like I dont have enough $$$. Have this fantasy of up and leaving and starting over in a new city/province. Future seems bleak. Im aware that its just internal thoughts, but theyve been nipping at me since my 33rd birthday last month.

What do you guys do keep you motivated?

Sorry, guess I needed to vent. I normally dont post stuff like this here. Please dont quote this as I may delete it later.
 
I'm not a very motivated person in general, but contemplating death is pretty effective in my experience. I find it makes me more aware of the limited time that I do have, and seems to make some things more salient. Like if I died today, would I be okay with that? If not, what do I need to do to get there? That kind of thing. I'm not sure if that's what you're talking about, though.
 
I'm the same; only I've been feeling that way during the last 4-5 years. Even more during the last 2 as I was fired, and can't find any job..not even washing dishes.

In my case, thinking about stuff I'd like to do is what keeps me centered and motivated. That I'd like to move out, study something new, live on my own, etc. etc.
though when I stop thinking/day dreaming I go back to my old self. :|
 
SpaceBridge said:
Sorry, guess I needed to vent. I normally dont post stuff like this here. Please dont quote this as I may delete it later.
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I have the same fantasy and I'm only 26. I wanna up and leave and start over, but I know (as I've said before to someone else) you can't run away from yourself, and that's ultimately what it sounds like you're having some issues with. You'll probably still be 33 and feel like you don't have enough money regardless of where you move...

Hope you feel better soon. I always get the blues after my birthday for a while.

To keep me motivated I just enjoy the time I have left. You start to feel less sorry for yourself and stop wasting time ruminating once you know approximately how much that is.
 
SpaceBridge: I went through the same thing a couple of years ago, and while it was at a similar age, it wasn't so much due to feeling old as much as it was about feeling like I'd wasted all that time. The decade from my 20th to my 30th could almost go unaccounted for considering what I accomplished: absolutely nothing. At least you've (presumably) had some dates or relationships, which is more than I can claim.

What kept and continues to keep me going was
a) the realization that I would be dead by my own hand in a matter of years without a serious shake-up
b) meeting someone online who provided that eye-opening change of perspective and the affirmation that I could be loved, desired, and respected without needing to be anyone but me
and c) using this new sense of purpose and self-respect to push myself into leaving behind the dead-end job, lifeless town, and familiar routines of 20+ years by moving across the country to finally go to school because I couldn't stand another year wishing things were different when I could actually make them different.

I still don't have much money and don't often go out socializing, but I'm working towards a better life now and it makes me feel comfortable and content for the first time ever. Things are always challenging here, sometimes frightening, but always interesting and stimulating and worth the effort. Certainly, my experience won't apply directly to yours, but what I can advise in the most general sense is to take chances, big ones, and find that reason or purpose to do so. If it's to make more money, or see something else outside your window for once, or further your education, or start a motorcycle repair shop in Auburn, or become a roadie for Journey, whatever. You can always start over.
 
SpaceBridge said:
***sad sack stuff***
Sorry, guess I needed to vent. I normally dont post stuff like this here. Please dont quote this as I may delete it later.
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I'm very much in a similar situation, I never finished school and I need to go back. I would LOVE to move to another state early/mid 2012 if I can.
 
Cosmic Bus said:
SpaceBridge: I went through the same thing a couple of years ago, and while it was at a similar age, it wasn't so much due to feeling old as much as it was about feeling like I'd wasted all that time. The decade from my 20th to my 30th could almost go unaccounted for considering what I accomplished: absolutely nothing. At least you've (presumably) had some dates or relationships, which is more than I can claim.

What kept and continues to keep me going was
a) the realization that I would be dead by my own hand in a matter of years without a serious shake-up
b) meeting someone online who provided that eye-opening change of perspective and the affirmation that I could be loved, desired, and respected without needing to be anyone but me
and c) using this new sense of purpose and self-respect to push myself into leaving behind the dead-end job, lifeless town, and familiar routines of 20+ years by moving across the country to finally go to school because I couldn't stand another year wishing things were different when I could actually make them different.

I still don't have much money and don't often go out socializing, but I'm working towards a better life now and it makes me feel comfortable and content for the first time ever. Things are always challenging here, sometimes frightening, but always interesting and stimulating and worth the effort. Certainly, my experience won't apply directly to yours, but what I can advise in the most general sense is to take chances, big ones, and find that reason or purpose to do so. If it's to make more money, or see something else outside your window for once, or further your education, or start a motorcycle repair shop in Auburn, or become a roadie for Journey, whatever. You can always start over.
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Fear is keeping me from making changes. Fear and being comfortable in routine. Fear of failure, of rejection, of losing what I have now. Ive been homeless before when i was in my late teens, sleeping in my office at work, having no one to turn to for help, I dont want to end up like that again, so I keep trudging along, hating myself for doing it. Feel like Im paying for my mistakes from my early 20's today.

I dunno, this sounds silly, im not normally like this. Im sorry. I know what I have to do, what needs to get done, but making those decisions alone is a scary prospect.
 
Cosmic Bus said:
a) the realization that I would be dead by my own hand in a matter of years without a serious shake-up
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This is amazing. I've had friends who've described this feeling, like they're on a downward spiral and they know exactly how it's going to end. And rather than making them depressive, it whips them into shape and - for one friend - changed his life radically for the better.
 
SpaceBridge said:
Fear is keeping me from making changes. ... I dont want to end up like that again, so I keep trudging along, hating myself for doing it.

I know what I have to do, what needs to get done, but making those decisions alone is a scary prospect.
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Believe me, few people could've been as fucking terrified as I was making these choices. In the span of six months I had quit a miserable job, almost run out of money, decided to hang myself (obviously couldn't go through with it), met that guy online, decided to go back to school, sold 90% of my possessions, got a small loan, moved to Seattle with a couple of suitcases and enrolled in school. I left literally everyone and everything behind.

I spent way too many years living the exact same fears you talk about, hating every day that things were the same. When I honestly couldn't even comprehend continuing to live with such self-loathing and hatred towards everything around me, I made a commitment to fixing my goddamn life and I treated it like it was the last chance I would have (and still think of it this way).

Part way into the second quarter of school, I dropped out. This was devastating, because I suddenly thought maybe these choices had been all wrong. Then I was unemployed for nine months! I refused to let it all fall apart so quickly, and now I'm back in school and in a great job that I love.

You can't make these kinds of decisions based on "I want a man! I need new friends!" or some bullshit like that. You make a serious change in your place or your habits or your frame of mind because it's going to save your life.
 
Yep I'm kinda back with my ex...

While I do still have feelings for him he did badly on asking me for a break to figure out who he wanted since he basically doubted about us but I guess time will tell. I won't get emotionally attached and I will let him initiate more the conversations this time. If he really wants things to work out he has to prove me that he wants to do it, so he has to show it. He knows that I'm not completely sure about it and the has a lot of things to prove in order to win me over.

Im meh and yay at the same time... :/

Edit: I believe I see a pattern of interest and then disinterest. I just hope he is using me for when he doesn't feel love by someone nearer him (I mentioned before it was a long distance thing) If he tells me he wants to break up again soon I will tell him that it was the last time and he can either just take a friendship from me or just take our own ways. (Now I'm teary eyed for some stupid reason) -_-
 
Yeah, same here. I've been wanting a relationship for over 10 years, and the last thing I'll do is to break someone's relationship.


Pupi18 said:
Edit: I believe I see a pattern of interest and then disinterest. I just hope he is using me for when he doesn't feel love by someone nearer him (I mentioned before it was a long distance thing) If he tells me he wants to break up again soon I will tell him that it was the last time and he can either just take a friendship from me or just take our own ways. (Now I'm teary eyed for some stupid reason) -_-
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Yep. If anything, talk things out too.
 
Oh I know you bitches are side eyeing me but to be fair, my situation was not so black and white and it's a long story. The truth is... I wouldn't like to be cheated on either lol
 
SaintZ said:
Oh I know you bitches are side eyeing me but to be fair, my situation was not so black and white and it's a long story. The truth is... I wouldn't like to be cheated on either lol
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Bitch, go eat a sammich. :p

Plus I know you're not the breaking/cheating type anyway :p
 
SaintZ said:
Oh I know you bitches are side eyeing me but to be fair, my situation was not so black and white and it's a long story. The truth is... I wouldn't like to be cheated on either lol
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2dffc7a16ed1ab92b5cc5995580b4917.gif
 
dragonlife said:
Nope. I just don't like people making broad statements that make it seem like I'm not gay because I don't do this or that.
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I get you. I still get the occasional "you sure you're gay? You don't like to go to the nightclub!". UGH.
Marius_ said:
2dffc7a16ed1ab92b5cc5995580b4917.gif
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4hys8w.jpg

I don't get it either. But love New York.
 
dragonlife said:
Nope. I just don't like people making broad statements that make it seem like I'm not gay because I don't do this or that.
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I agree. Back when I first came out I remember my sisters friends saying that I was not really gay because when I would go clubbing I'd not dance and look like an "observer". When I confronted one of them about it, of course they backpedaled because that's not what they really said. Sure...

Recently this young gay dude I met on MH said "You play games? You're one of those?!?" Yep, I'm one of those, whatever those are anwyay.. :p
 
Sseklebeast said:
I agree. Back when I first came out I remember my sisters friends saying that I was not really gay because when I would go clubbing I'd not dance and look like an "observer". When I confronted one of them about it, of course they backpedaled because that's not what they really said. Sure...

Recently this young gay dude I met on MH said "You play games? You're one of those?!?" Yep, I'm one of those, whatever those are anwyay.. :p
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a nerd? It is shamed upon in the gay community
 
Sseklebeast said:
I agree. Back when I first came out I remember my sisters friends saying that I was not really gay because when I would go clubbing I'd not dance and look like an "observer". When I confronted one of them about it, of course they backpedaled because that's not what they really said. Sure...

Recently this young gay dude I met on MH said "You play games? You're one of those?!?" Yep, I'm one of those, whatever those are anwyay.. :p
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Where are you from by the way?
Gay guys from around here, in online sites tend to say the same thing. :p

"Ugh, so you find enjoyment in that?" "You're one of those?"


EDIT:
Should add that did said "gay guys", but because "straight guys" usually get excited and proceed to talk about games. :p
 
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