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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|

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Eccocid said:
do it for the lulz!

Nah seriously dont do it, you would sound like a creepy person from his point of view.

I'm just trying to put myself in the shoes of the other guy. How would I feel if some random guy told me he really liked me in high school and it helped him realize he was gay? I'd feel pretty good!
 
So, is it bad that I'm realizing I have very little in common with my gaggle of good gay friends, but that I'm seriously considering an invite up to one of their cottages with 10 other homos for a long weekend next month, just on the off-chance that some wild and crazy shit happens?

lol
 
Magnus said:
So, is it bad that I'm realizing I have very little in common with my gaggle of good gay friends, but that I'm seriously considering an invite up to one of their cottages with 10 other homos for a long weekend next month, just on the off-chance that some wild and crazy shit happens?

lol


No. It sounds good to me. Have fun.
 
Magnus said:
So, is it bad that I'm realizing I have very little in common with my gaggle of good gay friends, but that I'm seriously considering an invite up to one of their cottages with 10 other homos for a long weekend next month, just on the off-chance that some wild and crazy shit happens?

lol
no way that sounds fun!
 
Ratrat said:
What's a good gay read? preferably fiction.

Call Me By Your Name by Andre Aciman. Sexually confused teenager falls for an older man boarding at the family's summer home; the bulk of the story takes place over several months, but it ultimately goes much further beyond that. It's beautifully written, often wry and funny, heartbreaking, and hot... I absolutely adored it.
 
Cosmic Bus said:
Call Me By Your Name by Andre Aciman. Sexually confused teenager falls for an older man boarding at the family's summer home; the bulk of the story takes place over several months, but it ultimately goes much further beyond that. It's beautifully written, often wry and funny, heartbreaking, and hot... I absolutely adored it.
Ordered! :D thanks
julls said:
This book was written by a friend of ours - really entertaining (though, not fiction)

Don't Tell Your Father : Conversations about Coming Out

god, I need a Kindle.
 
I'll suggest two more on wildly opposite ends of the spectrum:

Pulp Friction, which is a collection of vintage gay short stories (they're full-on porn, tbh, but a fun read!) and some analytical essays on their cultural impact, and something much headier, The Carnivorous Lamb, a pretty subversive, political and controversial Spanish novel from the '70s.
 
Ok, I thought I was gay. But definitely bi now . I never understood the fuss over boobs until I had them in my hands and mouth.
 
Boobs are great. <3

Cosmic Bus said:
Call Me By Your Name by Andre Aciman. Sexually confused teenager falls for an older man boarding at the family's summer home; the bulk of the story takes place over several months, but it ultimately goes much further beyond that. It's beautifully written, often wry and funny, heartbreaking, and hot... I absolutely adored it.
Thanks for this, I just reserved it the university library. The subject terms the library use for the book make me feel a bit creepy though: 'Teenage boys -- Fiction' 'Gay teenagers -- Fiction' 'Intimacy (Psychology) -- Fiction'.

Yep, that's right Mr. Librarian, I'm going to jack off while reading your book about gay teen love. You got a problem with that?
 
Cosmic Bus said:
Call Me By Your Name by Andre Aciman. Sexually confused teenager falls for an older man boarding at the family's summer home; the bulk of the story takes place over several months, but it ultimately goes much further beyond that. It's beautifully written, often wry and funny, heartbreaking, and hot... I absolutely adored it.

How old are we talking here?
 
idwl said:
Ok, I thought I was gay. But definitely bi now . I never understood the fuss over boobs until I had them in my hands and mouth.
I thought trying this would work too.


It sure didn't. D:

ohwell. Cock it is~ <3
 
Stabbie said:
How old are we talking here?


Not scandalously older. The younger is 17 at the beginning of the book and the man is late 20s, if memory serves. The whole matter is handled fairly inconsequentially (as it should be), and most of the story details the wide swings of emotion involved with his experience rather than, say, 300 pages of tawdry bedroom talk... although given that this is 1980s Italian Riviera, there are several very enjoyable sections of that too. ;)
 
Boobs are awesome, but I don't think I'd ever see them as anything sexual -- they're just amusing to play with. So many of my large-chested female friends and coworkers have always practically forced them into my hands, it's reeeally funny and will never fail to make nearby straight dudes jealous.
 
Boobs are cool but vaginas scare me. Me and my best friend Katy used to try to mess around when we were little, before we could really even do anything. She once wanted me to pop some kind of air/watery looking bubble down there with my tongue and I never would do it. I'm still scarred to this day.
 
xelios said:
Boobs are cool but vaginas scare me. Me and my best friend Katy used to try to mess around when we were little, before we could really even do anything. She once wanted me to pop some kind of air/watery looking bubble down there with my tongue and I never would do it. I'm still scarred to this day.
The fuck?
 
Went to a wrap party two weeks ago for a TV production I PA'd on for two months.

Briefly connected with/chatted up an insanely cute dude who works on Post for the show with the production company. Got signals all night from him. Locked eyes a bunch of times, extra-long handshakes and stares, etc. And most telling of all, we bumped into each other in the bathroom around midnight when everyone's buzz had settled in and the party got rolling for real, and on my way out while just checking myself in the mirror, he turns to say to me while pissing at the stall, "Aw man, don't stress, you look great!" with the biggest smile.

Like...what straight man on Earth would have done that, right?

Anyway, lost track of him as the party got wilder, and didn't see him again. Managed to get his e-mail from his (and my) boss on the show in the midst of post-production e-mails that get sent around (you know, the thank-yous and stay-in-touch! emails, etc), and I e-mailed him under the pretense of wanting to learn more about Post on the show (which I kind of actually do), but really, just to reconnect with him and see if he's single, plays for the team, etc.

One friend told me this is a stupid idea, that I'm abusing a work connection and that I might get in shit if I ever make a move (down the line -- I'm not gonna ask him to coffee to chat about work and then try sucking his dick at a Starbucks). It's totally innocent and just about work right now. This is acceptable, right? lol
 
Magnus said:
One friend told me this is a stupid idea, that I'm abusing a work connection and that I might get in shit if I ever make a move (down the line -- I'm not gonna ask him to coffee to chat about work and then try sucking his dick at a Starbucks). It's totally innocent and just about work right now. This is acceptable, right? lol
Seems like a win-win situation to me - you get to have what should hopefully be an interesting discussion about Post and get to see if he is interested and available.

I don't understand the part about abusing a work connection though - I mean, people who work together end up dating all the time, it should be no big deal, right? It's not like his workplace need to know anyways.
 
Magnus said:
Went to a wrap party two weeks ago for a TV production I PA'd on for two months.

Briefly connected with/chatted up an insanely cute dude who works on Post for the show with the production company. Got signals all night from him. Locked eyes a bunch of times, extra-long handshakes and stares, etc. And most telling of all, we bumped into each other in the bathroom around midnight when everyone's buzz had settled in and the party got rolling for real, and on my way out while just checking myself in the mirror, he turns to say to me while pissing at the stall, "Aw man, don't stress, you look great!" with the biggest smile.

Like...what straight man on Earth would have done that, right?

Anyway, lost track of him as the party got wilder, and didn't see him again. Managed to get his e-mail from his (and my) boss on the show in the midst of post-production e-mails that get sent around (you know, the thank-yous and stay-in-touch! emails, etc), and I e-mailed him under the pretense of wanting to learn more about Post on the show (which I kind of actually do), but really, just to reconnect with him and see if he's single, plays for the team, etc.

One friend told me this is a stupid idea, that I'm abusing a work connection and that I might get in shit if I ever make a move (down the line -- I'm not gonna ask him to coffee to chat about work and then try sucking his dick at a Starbucks). It's totally innocent and just about work right now. This is acceptable, right? lol
i don't see anything wrong with this at all. go for it!
 
So I have this problem. Hopefully some of you can help me with it:

I have been in the closet to my family but I am out to my friends. I tried coming out to my mom when I was 16 but she refused to accept it and basically put me back in the closet. This made me very worrisome to tell anyone else in my family so I didn't. My sister once even--point-blank--asked me if I'm gay and I denied it. At this point she knows that I'm gay but I'm still unable to even tell her. Fast forward eight years later (I'm now 24): My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for eight months now and he wants me to come out to them. As much as I want to, I can't muster up the courage to actually do it. I don't know what it is but I think I just don't want to disrupt anything.

Is it bad that he wants me to come out and is sometimes frustrated by this? Plus, I would very much like to come out to my family but I just can't. Does anyone have any tips on how to do it? I figure there is no easy way to do it but maybe there is a good way?
 
G0523 said:
So I have this problem. Hopefully some of you can help me with it:

I have been in the closet to my family but I am out to my friends. I tried coming out to my mom when I was 16 but she refused to accept it and basically put me back in the closet. This made me very worrisome to tell anyone else in my family so I didn't. My sister once even--point-blank--asked me if I'm gay and I denied it. At this point she knows that I'm gay but I'm still unable to even tell her. Fast forward eight years later (I'm now 24): My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for eight months now and he wants me to come out to them. As much as I want to, I can't muster up the courage to actually do it. I don't know what it is but I think I just don't want to disrupt anything.

Is it bad that he wants me to come out and is sometimes frustrated by this? Plus, I would very much like to come out to my family but I just can't. Does anyone have any tips on how to do it? I figure there is no easy way to do it but maybe there is a good way?

Is it affecting your relationship negatively? Like are you guys constantly having to sneak around and hide instead of just living as a regular couple? If so, it's somewhat understandable that he wants you to come out, but otherwise he just needs to be patient with you. Do you live with your parents? Are you able to live on your own? If not, then don't risk it if it worries you that much. It's not likely that they'll kick you out, but sometimes people don't know their own parents as well as they think. Also, why exactly do you want to tell them? I don't really see a point in it. It's none of their business. Just go on living your life the way you want. That doesn't mean you have to lie about yourself, but I can't think of a reason for gathering your family and telling them.
 
_Isaac said:
Is it affecting your relationship negatively? Like are you guys constantly having to sneak around and hide instead of just living as a regular couple? If so, it's somewhat understandable that he wants you to come out, but otherwise he just needs to be patient with you. Do you live with your parents? Are you able to live on your own? If not, then don't risk it if it worries you that much. It's not likely that they'll kick you out, but sometimes people don't know their own parents as well as they think. Also, why exactly do you want to tell them? I don't really see a point in it. It's none of their business. Just go on living your life the way you want. That doesn't mean you have to lie about yourself, but I can't think of a reason for gathering your family and telling them.
It sometimes is affecting our relationship negatively. We do constantly sneak around and hide whenever my parents ask what I'm doing or where I am. I do live with my parents and I am not able to live on my own yet. I just want to tell them because I'm really into him and want to introduce him to my parents. He did so for me. Plus, I get jealous whenever my sister talks about her boyfriend, and brings him over, comfortably with our parents and I can't.
 
Whoa! I didn't know we had gay gaffers. I thought I was alone on this site. That's awesome. I haven't been in a relationship in years. I blame the area though I live in, and not so much the fact I'm a hardcore gamer and in my early 30's.

Being gay in Texas is hard as fuck.
 
RPGCrazied said:
Whoa! I didn't know we had gay gaffers. I thought I was alone on this site. That's awesome. I haven't been in a relationship in years. I blame the area though I live in, and not so much the fact I'm a hardcore gamer and in my early 30's.

Being gay in Texas is hard as fuck.
LOL, have you never crossed into OT or something? GayGAF is pretty active.
 
RPGCrazied said:
Whoa! I didn't know we had gay gaffers. I thought I was alone on this site. That's awesome. I haven't been in a relationship in years. I blame the area though I live in, and not so much the fact I'm a hardcore gamer and in my early 30's.

Being gay in Texas is hard as fuck.

You should have seen the original Gay-Gaf thread.
 
RPGCrazied said:
Whoa! I didn't know we had gay gaffers. I thought I was alone on this site. That's awesome. I haven't been in a relationship in years. I blame the area though I live in, and not so much the fact I'm a hardcore gamer and in my early 30's.

Being gay in Texas is hard as fuck.

We have tons of gay Texans too!
 
I'm 'dating' a guy -- an ex from years ago, to be exact -- and when we first met up in a long time, earlier this year, his hair was really long, falling down to his shoulders.

His hair used to be his best feature, it was thick and lustrous, stood up in a quiff at the front and was cute and it really suited him.

But now... the long hair... I'm really not a fan. In fact, I'm slightly unattracted to it. My rationalisation is that I want to be dating a GUY who looks like a GUY, with normal short hair and all that, but his long hair is unappealing.

He also stares/smiles at me lovingly, and it sounds kinda cruel I know but it's kinda offputting. There's a slight feministic quality about it, although generally among gay guys I know of personally he's one of the least effeminate.

Am I being too picky? Is it normal to not really be attracted to effeminate characteristics?
 
GAF A60-Rim A said:
I'm 'dating' a guy -- an ex from years ago, to be exact -- and when we first met up in a long time, earlier this year, his hair was really long, falling down to his shoulders.

His hair used to be his best feature, it was thick and lustrous, stood up in a quiff at the front and was cute and it really suited him.

But now... the long hair... I'm really not a fan. In fact, I'm slightly unattracted to it. My rationalisation is that I want to be dating a GUY who looks like a GUY, with normal short hair and all that, but his long hair is unappealing.

He also stares/smiles at me lovingly, and it sounds kinda cruel I know but it's kinda offputting. There's a slight feministic quality about it, although generally among gay guys I know of personally he's one of the least effeminate.

Am I being too picky? Is it normal to not really be attracted to effeminate characteristics?

I think it's normal to not be attracted to some people. I used to think along the same lines as you, that I really didn't like any form of effeminate characteristics. Turns out I just didn't like the guys rather than the said characteristic.

Even then, you're allowed to not like that particularly. Everyone has different taste when it comes to guys and the loving stares and smiles can be really offputting if you don't really care/like the person who gives them.
 
Well I think on the second point (the smiles and stares) it's maybe because deep down I don't really want to be -- or need to be? -- "loved" loved. Like, loved is okay, companionship and all that, but I want a hot manly guy to spend time with as a very very best friend... I dunno... confusing.
 
GAF A60-Rim A said:
Well I think on the second point (the smiles and stares) it's maybe because deep down I don't really want to be -- or need to be? -- "loved" loved. Like, loved is okay, companionship and all that, but I want a hot manly guy to spend time with as a very very best friend... I dunno... confusing.
Sometimes I think that some people like to feel 'protected/loved', and some people like to be the 'protector/lover'. Is that what you mean?
 
RPGCrazied said:
Whoa! I didn't know we had gay gaffers. I thought I was alone on this site. That's awesome. I haven't been in a relationship in years. I blame the area though I live in, and not so much the fact I'm a hardcore gamer and in my early 30's.

Being gay in Texas is hard as fuck.
how could you possibly not know there is a gaygaf? i thought we were famous.
 
G0523 said:
So I have this problem. Hopefully some of you can help me with it:

I have been in the closet to my family but I am out to my friends. I tried coming out to my mom when I was 16 but she refused to accept it and basically put me back in the closet. This made me very worrisome to tell anyone else in my family so I didn't. My sister once even--point-blank--asked me if I'm gay and I denied it. At this point she knows that I'm gay but I'm still unable to even tell her. Fast forward eight years later (I'm now 24): My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for eight months now and he wants me to come out to them. As much as I want to, I can't muster up the courage to actually do it. I don't know what it is but I think I just don't want to disrupt anything.

Is it bad that he wants me to come out and is sometimes frustrated by this? Plus, I would very much like to come out to my family but I just can't. Does anyone have any tips on how to do it? I figure there is no easy way to do it but maybe there is a good way?
If you are sure that your sister knows(how does she treats you? is she indifferent? is she older or younger than you?), if you are completely sure just tell her. Find a moment when your parents are not around and tell her, she might help you out(like telling you if its a good or bad idea to tell your parents) and you will feel less stressed.
 
btkadams said:
how could you possibly not know there is a gaygaf? i thought we were famous.
lol you thought you were famous

RPGCrazied said:
Whoa! I didn't know we had gay gaffers. I thought I was alone on this site. That's awesome. I haven't been in a relationship in years. I blame the area though I live in, and not so much the fact I'm a hardcore gamer and in my early 30's.

Being gay in Texas is hard as fuck.

also, i know lots of bears in texas... if you like bears it seems like a good place to be... austin especially
 
RPGCrazied said:
Whoa! I didn't know we had gay gaffers. I thought I was alone on this site. That's awesome. I haven't been in a relationship in years. I blame the area though I live in, and not so much the fact I'm a hardcore gamer and in my early 30's.

Being gay in Texas is hard as fuck.

Is this your first time in the OT section? :lol
 
Jezan said:
If you are sure that your sister knows(how does she treats you? is she indifferent? is she older or younger than you?), if you are completely sure just tell her. Find a moment when your parents are not around and tell her, she might help you out(like telling you if its a good or bad idea to tell your parents) and you will feel less stressed.
She treats me the same as she always has, although she's gotten much better than when we were both teenagers (she grew up). She's younger than me by 3 years. I am completely sure she knows.
 
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