RPGCrazied
Member
I'm sorry if I caused the uproar. I'm generally a nice guy. 
Just misunderstood sometimes.
Just misunderstood sometimes.
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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|
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I'm sure you're familiar with all the psychobabble around these issues, but I do think the old adage that you should learn to love yourself before you can love others rings true, at least to some extent.RPGCrazied said:
To me, a guy who walks with confidence, believes in himself and his abilities, but can make a joke at his own expense and isn't vain is incredibly attractive. Even better if he makes the effort to live healthy and looks after his body, and has developed his own interests and is confident enough to talk about the things he's passionate about with ease.
I would think all of these qualities come from a position of loving the self.
You have to get out there in order to meet people, but if your town is too small or is suffocating, then it's going to make it harder to find like minded people.
Harder, but not impossible. The larger the pool of people, the easier it's going to be (and more fun I'd think).
It may seem like there is a dearth of nice nerdy guys out there who aren't superficial, but they are out there - your fellow GayGaffers are evidence of that.
RPGCrazied
Member
Kyon said:
*hugs back*
Tell that to the handful of fat I can grab.
By the way, if anyone is curious, this is me. And to make people feel any better about the shirtless thing, I'll do it for the sake of being nice, but don't expect anything good. Just wanted to show that I am fat. lol!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v252/RPGCrazied/Picture548.jpg
RPGCrazied said:*hugs back*
Tell that to the handful of fat I can grab.
By the way, if anyone is curious, this is me. And to make people feel any better about the shirtless thing, I'll do it for the sake of being nice, but don't expect anything good. Just wanted to show that I am fat. lol!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v252/RPGCrazied/Picture548.jpg
that isnt fat :lol i just dont see it
RPGCrazied
Member
Kyon said:
Camera magic and sucking in. =P
Cosmic Bus
pristine morning snow
RPGCrazied said:
I'm in the same boat here -- mid-30s, unnecessarily hard on myself, never been hit on (in person) or dated anyone -- but over the past couple years I've come to terms with a lot of stuff in my life and just deal with things in my own way without forcing myself to be or act like someone that I'm clearly not. It's not a realistic solution for everyone, but I've got the patience of a saint and my general "que sera, sera" attitude makes living as a passive 'mo pretty comfortable.
Case in point: I've been close friends online with a young Canadian guy for over two years now; there's a tremendous amount of love and companionship between us, and I've made some pretty significant decisions during this time that were geared largely towards a) completely shaking up my dangerously depressive existence and b) making real the possibility of he and I having something more than an online friendship. Now, we're finally going to be meeting up in person this October and there are a lot of conflicting emotions inside me because of this. Obviously, I'm thrilled to getting the chance to get my arms around this guy, but my expectations absolutely need to be kept in check because he doesn't believe in distance relationships (we'll be living around 3hrs apart by this point) and I totally respect that. So in a way, I've got to let him go, but still make it clear that if and when the opportunity presents itself, I'm going to be there, ready to take the next step... My emotions and attractions can't be divided up among multiple people, and I acknowledge that this doesn't necessarily mean I'm depriving myself of other relationships because this is what makes me happy.
Basically what I'm saying is that you/everyone should try to relax a bit when it comes to the whole "I NEED A BOYFREIND." mentality and figure out what will be fulfilling to them, whether it's going on a totally focused hunt for men and getting laid all the time, taking the initiative and do the asking-out if it seems like they're not approaching you first, volunteering with lgbt groups (where you might just stumble into someone great!) or simply just kicking back to think, "hey, if it happens it happens, and I'm cool with myself no matter what."
RPGCrazied
Member
Cosmic Bus said:
Wow. Well, good luck to you. I'd actually do a long distance relationship. They sure aren't here in Lubbock, Texas. It's just I've been single so long I feel empty inside. You see, I'm a Cancer, the romantic type. I just have 0 motivation when it comes to anything without being with someone. Yes, I understand the whole be in love with yourself before someone can love you back. That's why I'm trying to get into shape, but its very slow going.
@Kyon: Why thank you. If you say so.
Aw yiss. Seems like fun times, would love to hear how things go with Google guy in ze future. He definitely reminds me of myself in some ways (I have a gut feeling I'll inevitably annoy the shit out of some people, heh). Cooold pot 'o water on the stove, if you catch my meaning.GothPunk said:So yeah, hope that was an interesting storytime
Yeah, I'd be up for trying a game over the weekend. Jeff might have night classes or summat, and ben's in good 'ol Australia, so who knows if that'll workPerhaps sometime at the weekend would work out best? I can totally play in the evening times here though, which would be lunchtime or so for you and Jeffrey I think but early morning for Ben.
Hope you feel better Boto and too bad I couldn't get my story time up in time for it to count as bedtime reading.
You sound like me expect I'm waaay over 160 and living in Boston which is a city for superficial gays. Wish I could give u advice but the gay world is horrible and evil least in my experience. It doesn't get better by the long shot.RPGCrazied said:I'm sorry if I caused the uproar. I'm generally a nice guy.
Wonderfully put Cosmic. A lot of people do have the Veruca Salt attitude. Sometimes you've gotta wait, sometimes you've gotta grab life by the balls.Cosmic Bus said:
Good! ^^ Stick with it, you'll be healthier in mind and body because of it.RPGCrazied said:
Well even a low heat will make a pot boil... in time. Maybe I will find it too difficult to handle, but honestly, right now I think taking my time is exactly what I need. He was honest with me about it from the outset so I guess I went into things with all the information, so perhaps that's why I don't mind. Honesty and being open about it goes a long way ^^.Botolf said:
Well I'll get on early or stay up a bit late if needs be. It sounds like it'd be FUN!Botolf said:Yeah, I'd be up for trying a game over the weekend. Jeff might have night classes or summat, and ben's in good 'ol Australia, so who knows if that'll work
I know I'm the most hated in this thread but your approach doesn't work, I've been to gay clubs, gay groups, social outing even waited and nothing ever came of it. So in essence what you are saying is " oh wait you'll meet someone" which is the same stuff people been feeding others for years.
Indeed! Hopefully this fellah warms to you with timeGothPunk said:
. And yeah, honesty is vital in many things. The lengths people will go to avoid it is baffling to me sometimes.My only condition is that the map has a lot of water on it. Boto needs his subs!Well I'll get on early or stay up a bit late if needs be. It sounds like it'd be FUN!
Phonomezer
Banned
neojubei said:
Please! I don't see any hate in this thread, let alone any directed at you.
Chill
ZephyrFate
Banned
It's not that you're hated, but that you're consistently pessimistic and that's probably the last thing young gays need. We need to start hearing some optimism around here, folks...neojubei said:
Cosmic Bus
pristine morning snow
neojubei said:
Yes and no. I wasn't trying to give a laundry list of things to do, I'm suggesting that there are a multitude of approaches that work differently for everyone, and to figure out what's going to fit your personality and attitude. Some people do meet guys by just waiting around, some have to fight for it, and yes, some of us might not be cut out for dating at all, but none of this absolutely, positively matters until you can get out of bed in the morning without hating the world and your current situation. If you aren't happy with yourself as it is now, then getting romantically and/or sexually involved with someone isn't going to automatically change that; metaphorically-speaking, you've got to fix the foundation or the house is never going to stay standing, y'know?
It might sound like like a self help excerpt, but that really is the core of it all. Working to become content with who you are or putting in the effort to change the aspects you aren't content with is so much more important than the theoretical status of [x] IN A RELATIONSHIP. Find a purpose, find some fulfillment in your daily life and then build off of that.
plasticpassion
Member
No hate, just love.
Okay that's not really relevant but I just wanted to stop in and say hi.
Okay that's not really relevant but I just wanted to stop in and say hi.
Phonomezer
Banned
ZephyrFate said:
Insanely Twisted Shadow Planet just finished downloading
SpaceBridge
Member
RPGCrazied said:
Hey, you better not be referring to me, cuz I was making a joke about an earlier post by Kyon.
RPGCrazied
Member
SpaceBridge said:
I was just overacting dude. If you scroll up I even posted me without a shirt to play a long. No hard feelings to anyone.
RPGCrazied said:
When you look at straight couples, you'll notice that the majority almost never has any common passions. Note the distinction between passions and interests. Interests = enjoying going to the movies, taking walks, etc. Passions are hobbies that take up most of your time and you'll barely find any couples that have this in common.
SpaceBridge
Member
RPGCrazied said:
'kay making sure. I wouldnt want to be lumped into your manifesto of sweeping gay generalizations.
Cosmic Bus said:
Guess that won't work for me. I won't wake up one day and the world will be shinning happy people dancing.
ZephyrFate said:
Wish I had something positive to say or something good share but my gay like have been the complete opposite. Nothing good happen in the past, nothing good happening now and probably never in the future.
Phonomezer said:Please! I don't see any hate in this thread, let alone any directed at you.
Chill
Sorry in my world everyone pretty much hates me.
Hope you meet someone RPGcrazied.
RPGCrazied
Member
I need a miracle, but thanks for the wishes neo.
neojubei said:
Once again: Post yourself in the picture thread. Someone will compliment you and that'll raise your self-esteem, in turn that'll make you feel better and you'll be less "WOE IS ME I'MMA DIE ALONE/SUICIDE" and go "FUCK OTHER PEOPLE. I'M A GOOD LOOKING DUDE AND IF THEY DON'T LIKE ME THEY CAN GO FUCK THEMSELVES."
As a depressed person myself, I'm so tired your shtick, Neo. :/
RPGCrazied said:
You should try http://www.meetup.com/
the site never worked for me, but might for you.
Marius_ said:
You can have it.
TheSeks said:
I am very very ugly. I really hate looking at myself in the mirror. If I did post a photo it will probably be of someone else.
RPGCrazied
Member
neojubei said:
I've tried OkCupid, Plenty of Fish, Yahoo personals, requestadate. I also tried adam4adam before I knew about it being a hookup site, so I left that. Oh yeah, tried gay.com too.
*sigh* ..me too.neojubei said:
And taking pictures is such a pain, because there's never one picture I like; so for example in my Facbeook nearly all my pics are taken by others. Of course I don't like them, but I got tired of un-tagging myself...my main-profile pics end been usually drawigns of my face, or recently my Mii on the 3DS. XD
In the end, well..I still consider myself uglier than sin and everything, and I know people do (heck I was screamed at, punched and kicked because of it through my school/college years); but I just moved on. Yeah, I'm ugly..so, whatever. More time and money to me!!!
I still come around this threads to see if I can provide any support, since I've been on situations of getting to know people online, the ups, downs,..and just general suggestions and tips. I'm happy for anyone i na relationship..and as I've said in the past too, a little jealous too. XD
Hehehe...Yeah, been there done that. I tried the "gay version of eHarmony". I think it has a different name, not sure. I know I tried it and they couldn't find a match based on the stuff I choose, thanked me for trying ans suggested to try again at a later time to see.RPGCrazied said:
neojubei said:
I'm sure you wonder what others think sometimes. If you want you can PM me your real photo and I'll give you an honest opinion. Sometimes we're too critical of ourselves; in my experience people aren't as unattractive as they think they are.
Looks play a large part in the beginning of a relationship, but there are a lot of other mediocre/averagely attractive guys out there (like me) or those who feel insecure about the way they look. I do wonder how often people go only after those they feel are "way out of their league" and end up disappointed though.
RPGCrazied said:
Well meetup isn't a gay site just a site to find groups with your interest.
fernoca said:*sigh* ..me too.
And taking pictures is such a pain, because there's never one picture I like; so for example in my Facbeook nearly all my pics are taken by others. Of course I don't like them, but I got tired of un-tagging myself...my main-profile pics end been usually drawigns of my face, or recently my Mii on the 3DS. XD
In the end, well..I still consider myself uglier than sin and everything, and I know people do (heck I was screamed at, punched and kicked because of it through my school/college years); but I just moved on. Yeah, I'm ugly..so, whatever. More time and money to me!!!
I still come around this threads to see if I can provide any support, since I've been on situations of getting to know people online, the ups, downs,..and just general suggestions and tips. I'm happy for anyone i na relationship..and as I've said in the past too, a little jealous too. XD
(
Had a friend once tag me in a photo on facebook, freaked me out. I don't even have any pics of myself in my high school year book and years ago i burned all my baby photos.
Marius_ said:
I'd sing the same song if i looked as good as Selena
xelios said:
I don't think I want to assault you with a photo of myself.
Hahah, was kinda lucky that there was no year book in my case, though I was still tagged in a few pics..ugh.neojubei said:
Baby pics I'm fine, since I looked cute during the first years...chubby, clean face/body and good hair!! Now I'm slim, hairy, f'd face and bad hair!! XD
I don't want to blow sunshine at you, so I will be as harsh as I can... better posture and more confidence would help a lot... that's all I can see wrong there. You look like a fine mid 30's guy, a bit nerdy but cute and charming. What's wrong with that? Seriously, just start riding, or going for walks, your posture will improve and you will feel more confident too.RPGCrazied said:*hugs back*
Tell that to the handful of fat I can grab.
By the way, if anyone is curious, this is me. And to make people feel any better about the shirtless thing, I'll do it for the sake of being nice, but don't expect anything good. Just wanted to show that I am fat. lol!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v252/RPGCrazied/Picture548.jpg
*For the record, I am 110kgs of lard arse who is slowly getting in better shape.
Facebook has a privacy setting so only friends can see the tags, I think.fernoca said:*sigh* ..me too.
And taking pictures is such a pain, because there's never one picture I like; so for example in my Facbeook nearly all my pics are taken by others. Of course I don't like them, but I got tired of un-tagging myself...my main-profile pics end been usually drawigns of my face, or recently my Mii on the 3DS. XD
RPGCrazied
Member
Being socially awkward doesn't help either. I'm quite shy in person, I'd probably never ask anyone out, they would have to do that.
I'm quite shy in person, I'd probably never ask anyone out, they would have to do that.RPGCrazied said:Being socially awkward doesn't help either.
When I was in high school I used to have the courage to ask guys out but was rejected 100% of the time.
I wish I had some good advice for you. you do look cute and sound nice.
Grimmy said:
Could be. Meeting lots of guys?
fernoca said:Hahah, was kinda lucky that there was no year book in my case, though I was still tagged in a few pics..ugh.
Baby pics I'm fine, since I looked cute during the first years...chubby, clean face/body and good hair!! Now I'm slim, hairy, f'd face and bad hair!! XD
I used to ask my mother why didn't she drown me when i was a baby whenever i looked my baby photos.
RPGCrazied
Member
I know. I sit in my computer chair a lot. I don't get out much. Thanks for the kind criticism. I'm really not all that though, but thanks guys for saying that.
Thanks for the kind criticism. I'm really not all that though, but thanks guys for saying that.neojubei said:
Meeting guys is never difficult. Finding one-night-stands is easy but finding an actual workable relationship is much tougher. I'm nearly 34 and been single for over 4 years. And I work in an industry where you can walk 5 minutes without bumping into gay guys. And now that I'm in Berlin it's even less of a distance :lol:
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