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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|

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I wouldn't say it's common, but I've definitely come across elements of biphobic feeling in the community. Not necessarily outright animosity that often, but the peddling of old tropes like the idea that bi people are just greedy or they're too scared to admit being gay, which generally pisses off bi/pan people. The latter is annoyingly prevalent because I think the 'oh i'm not gay, i'm jut bi' phase is quite common when people are coming to terms with their sexuality and people often assume that all bi people are still stuck on that stage. I know I had a moment where I thought I was bi. Admittedly it lasted all of about a day before I realised that I was strictly dickly, but the point still stands.
Took years for me. I was indeed attracted to guys and girls at the same time throughout much of middle school and high school. Attraction waned to just guys in college (probably by 20 or 21.)

It was a transitional phase, but the attractions were very real and took me a long time to come to terms with. Things have evened out a lot since then.
 
I always thought there was strong cohesion between gay/bi community...hell even the thread title gives that impression...

An old work colleague of mine recently commited suicide after his gay bf found out he had a wife and kid and told the wife the situation.
 
I always thought there was strong cohesion between gay/bi community...hell even the thread title gives that impression...

An old work colleague of mine recently commited suicide after his gay bf found out he had a wife and kid and told the wife the situation.

Ugh, awful.

Bisexuals do exist for the record *points at self*
 
The "issue" with Bi people is that if they are in a relationship, the other person will never truly know if they are giving them what they want.

At least that's where most of the problems usually start from what I've heard.

Personally I have nothing against Bi people.
 
If your boyfriend approves and you're not hiding the open relationship, then why not just ask outright that you guys are looking for a third? I don't think you need to make it overly complicated. Even I would feel flattered if I were ever approached with a similar proposition by my friends (though I'd never do it).
Well, because I don't want to risk ruining a friendship or making things awkward. We don't know for sure if that's what he really wants. It probably sounds very obvious from what I posted, but that may only be because I'm explaining it how I perceived it. As much as I'd love for us to have a thing with him, I value our friendship more. We're not just looking for sex. We're looking for a friend who might want to fool around with us, because we're curious. But friendship is more important, and I don't want to ruin one. =/

I wonder why I bother posting this stuff here anyway... I do want advice, but it's not like anyone here could give me very good advice unless they actually know both parties personally. I guess it's just me jumping at the chance to talk about something here, because I have no interest in most other stereotypical gay discussions, or I just can't relate to the discussion at all.
 
I always thought there was strong cohesion between gay/bi community...hell even the thread title gives that impression...

An old work colleague of mine recently commited suicide after his gay bf found out he had a wife and kid and told the wife the situation.

That's unfortunate but I think that this had probably more to do with the fact that this guy had 2 lives (one with the bf, one with the wife) than anything else. The bf must have felt betrayed and thus acted out of that more than out of the fact that he doesn't like bi people (and that's if he does actually dislike them).
 
That's unfortunate but I think that this had probably more to do with the fact that this guy had 2 lives (one with the bf, one with the wife) than anything else. The bf must have felt betrayed and thus acted out of that more than out of the fact that he doesn't like bi people (and that's if he does actually dislike them).
Exactly.
Gay men "hate" bisexual men as much as they hate other gay men, lesbian, bears, twinks, etc. (meaning that it depends on who you ask and that there's no one general consensus :p)

In some cases there's some history related to it that causes that hate (one side lied, had a second life, used gay men as just a quick fuck, etc.); in others just plain ignorance (bisexuals are just gays in denial, etc.).

And agree with FoneBone too. In the end is about trust, heck..a straight woman can be with a straight man and never know he's married or who is he thinking when they're together. That's not related to been straight or not.


Oh!

And damn nice pic F#A#Oo!
MOAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

:p
 
The "issue" with Bi people is that if they are in a relationship, the other person will never truly know if they are giving them what they want.

Which of course is silly logic because, no matter what, you can never truly know if you're giving your partner what they want.

That sounds like a trust issue, really, and not the fault of a given bisexual person.

Yup, the whole issue stems from insecurity.
 
I always thought there was strong cohesion between gay/bi community...hell even the thread title gives that impression...

An old work colleague of mine recently commited suicide after his gay bf found out he had a wife and kid and told the wife the situation.

ouch, but yeah that is certainly more to do with the fact that he was living two separate lives and when they eventually collided he couldnt handle it.... huge shame :(
 
My favourite artists are Mentaiko and Takeshi Matsu.
Takeshi Matsu is good.
.

Question: Is it common for gay people to dislike or hold some sort of animosity towards bisexuals?
Yes, unfortunately. Any mistrust I feel toward them stems from personal insecurities and negative past experiences. I try to give everyone an equal chance, but I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't be a little apprehensive at first if it were a bi guy again.

Growing up, many bi guys I knew masqueraded as heterosexuals and only acknowledged their other side when it was most convenient to them--in complete and total confidence. And when things got too complicated? They dropped all contact completely. You don't treat people like that. This eventually led to me getting burned way too many times because I repeatedly forgave that kind of behavior. It always left me in a horrible position. I had to be understanding of all the other crap in their lives that would've been compromised, but what else could I have done without making myself a target in the process?

Also:
The "issue" with Bi people is that if they are in a relationship, the other person will never truly know if they are giving them what they want.
This. It doesn't help being fem and feeling like I have to compete with women all the time. It's personal insecurity and not the bi person's fault, yet it's the nature of the situation.
 
Well, because I don't want to risk ruining a friendship or making things awkward. We don't know for sure if that's what he really wants. It probably sounds very obvious from what I posted, but that may only be because I'm explaining it how I perceived it. As much as I'd love for us to have a thing with him, I value our friendship more. We're not just looking for sex. We're looking for a friend who might want to fool around with us, because we're curious. But friendship is more important, and I don't want to ruin one. =/

Well, if he's a true--

I wonder why I bother posting this stuff here anyway... I do want advice, but it's not like anyone here could give me very good advice unless they actually know both parties personally. I guess it's just me jumping at the chance to talk about something here, because I have no interest in most other stereotypical gay discussions, or I just can't relate to the discussion at all.

Okay. Good luck then.
 
I think I just hold onto the bisexual tag because I'm too afraid to admit that I'm gay. I only see girls every once in a while who I think are hot but I do see guys all the time that I do think are hot. However, I have yet to have full on sex with anyone so who knows what I am. :/

I tell my parents I'm going to meet someone from online and that it's a guy but I never let on to the fact that they are gay guys. However, I think my parents suspect it.

EDIT: I had a blowjob from a friend and wasn't able to stay hard get off and y'all said I'm probably just not attracted to him. Maybe you are right!
 
The "issue" with Bi people is that if they are in a relationship, the other person will never truly know if they are giving them what they want.

If you're wondering this about the person you're dating (Not you, B, I mean a general 'you'), then you'd probably be insecure about it no matter what their sexuality is, and what your genders are. This is absolutely a trust issue, and not a sexuality issue.

Edit: I identify as bisexual, and I have yet to have sex with a girl. I tend to like guys more, and I feel like I could relate better to one, but I don't think I'd have any issues being with a girl (in any sense) outside of nervousness, at first.
 
I think I just hold onto the bisexual tag because I'm too afraid to admit that I'm gay. I only see girls every once in a while who I think are hot but I do see guys all the time that I do think are hot. However, I have yet to have full on sex with anyone so who knows what I am. :/

well, sexuality starts in your mind. If your sexual fantasies are filled with guys, then your mind is telling you your sexual preference, isn't it? let your mind and heart give you a diagnosis and then follow that path in your life, your partners/lovers will be happier if you stay true to yourself.
 
If you're wondering this about the person you're dating (Not you, B, I mean a general 'you'), then you'd probably be insecure about it no matter what their sexuality is, and what your genders are. This is absolutely a trust issue, and not a sexuality issue.

Edit: I identify as bisexual, and I have yet to have sex with a girl. I tend to like guys more, and I feel like I could relate better to one, but I don't think I'd have any issues being with a girl (in any sense) outside of nervousness, at first.

The fact is that if you're bi, you like both sexes. And sex-wise, that's problematic if you're the boyfriend or the girlfriend of the situation since your partner will likely need also the genre you're not.
 
The fact is that if you're bi, you like both sexes. And sex-wise, that's problematic if you're the boyfriend or the girlfriend of the situation since your partner will likely need also the genre you're not.

Well I know bisexuality can work different for people, and I have known some folks that feel like it's a switch, so they're either only attracted to guys, or only to girls. For both my ex and I, it was just a general attraction to both genders. I never had the urge to cheat or be unfaithful while we were together, because he made me happy.

This still isn't a sexuality-exclusive thing. You could say the same thing about any relationship, gay or straight. Your partner probably isn't into only one body 'type' (I know I'm not!), so I think it's a little silly to say that we 'need' something different when we're with someone already. I'm sure some people do, and that's probably why people cheat in the first place, for something different, but anyone and everyone can do it.
 
samurai on the cover and his son who are held hostage by some sort of feudal lord, tied up, tortured, raped and forced to fuck each other. It's pretty cool actually, one of his tamer works.

O________________________________________________o
 
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The fact is that if you're bi, you like both sexes. And sex-wise, that's problematic if you're the boyfriend or the girlfriend of the situation since your partner will likely need also the genre you're not.
For me it is more about indifference to gender, not wanting both. I appreciate male and female bodies, and am able to have emotional and physical connections with either. That doesn't mean I want both.
Well I know bisexuality can work different for people, and I have known some folks that feel like it's a switch, so they're either only attracted to guys, or only to girls. For both my ex and I, it was just a general attraction to both genders. I never had the urge to cheat or be unfaithful while we were together, because he made me happy.

This still isn't a sexuality-exclusive thing. You could say the same thing about any relationship, gay or straight. Your partner probably isn't into only one body 'type' (I know I'm not!), so I think it's a little silly to say that we 'need' something different when we're with someone already. I'm sure some people do, and that's probably why people cheat in the first place, for something different, but anyone and everyone can do it.
Well said. I often liken it to hair colour. I love redheads and brunettes, but just because my current partner is a redhead doesn't mean I will be wanting a brunette as well.
That’s when big brother stepped in. He said to his Dad “It’s my money, it’s my gift to him, if it’s what he wants I’m getting it for him, and if your gonna hit anyone for it, it’s going to be me.”

Damn, that brother is doing his job and then some. Hope the little brother makes it out okay.
 
The fact is that if you're bi, you like both sexes. And sex-wise, that's problematic if you're the boyfriend or the girlfriend of the situation since your partner will likely need also the genre you're not.

I don't know why so many people make this assumption. Just because a person is attracted to both men and women, doesn't mean that they NEED to have sexual relations with both. One or the other usually does the job.
 
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