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Getting over painful breakups?

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Just broke up with my lady of 2 1/2 years. I don't think its really sunk in just yet, but when it does, I'll probably be in a world of hurt. Anything to make me laugh, forget, or beat my chest like a man would be greatly appreciated.
 
Do things she would never let you when you were together. Play videogames for 16 hours straight, drink malt liquor, snort some coke; but whatever you, DO NOT SMOKE WEED!
 
btrboyev said:
time is the only thing that really works, and even then it never really goes away


so, so, so, so fucking true. i'm sorry, but i couldn't have said it any better. this is fact =/
 
Do not be alone. Hang out with some friends or try to meet a new group of people. But like btrboyev said, the feeling won't really go away....that is unless u find another relationship.
 
beerbelly said:
the feeling won't really go away....that is unless u find another relationship.

DO NOT take this perspective (ie. "the only thing that will make me happy is being with someone", it will only make things worse.
 
Diablos said:
:lol :lol :lol

Ecrofirt is in love with Rosy Palms.
peopleseyebrow.jpg

I've had a girlfriend for 3.5 years. I was just giving our newly dumped Nino sound advice.
 
btrboyev said:
time is the only thing that really works, and even then it never really goes away

Agreed on the first part. Disagreed on the second. Been through several bad breakups, but nothing hurts forever.

As for getting through the immediate pain, that seems to vary each time. But one time I just played Castlevania: Symphony of the Night obsessively to completion over the course of a week or so, and felt much better afterward. Worth a shot.
 
I'd say it never goes /completely/ away. At least, with first loves. :x Since my only really bad break up I've had so far has been with my first love. :lol It doesn't really affect me badly anymore but every now and then some things still remind me and I get a little hurt from it.
 
do not get drunk... you will end up crying in your hands and whining about the whole ordeal to your friends, who will then of course hate-chu

and i disagree with some in here. the pain will of course go away. %100 and completely. eventually.
 
Do things that will keep your mind off of her till you find someone else. Don't be in any rush to find a relationship or you will end up in a worse position than you are now.
 
btrboyev said:
yeah i got fucked..so i know how it goes.

me and you both buddy. i know a while ago(wtf was that, like a year and a half? who knows) we didn't have a healthy relationship on GAF...but i'm with you the whole way in this thread man :)
 
Boogie said:
It's as easy as flicking a light switch!
Don't be ridiculous, Boogie. As easy as changing a lightbulb with another bulb of the same wattage, perhaps. But flicking a light switch? You're out of your mind.
 
I can send you some free promotional material. If you like what you see, you can become a full-blown member for a nominal fee. If in doubt, refer to the avatar. It's 4 easy steps. :) PEACE.
 
My last girlfriend was fucking amazing. Which sucks cause now I hold every girl I meet to the standards set by her, which is horribly unfair. Guess I wont be dating for a while :(

*fires up Deathcab and buys booze*
 
keep yourself busy. and by that, i mean focus your energy on classes if you're a student, become a workaholic if you have a job, and leave little time for yourself other than sleeping and eating. when your mind is occupied on these things, it will give you little energy to think about her.
 
smirkrevenge said:
keep yourself busy. and by that, i mean focus your energy on classes if you're a student, become a workaholic if you have a job, and leave little time for yourself other than sleeping and eating. when your mind is occupied on these things, it will give you little energy to think about her.
I agree, this is the best way to do it...it's like scar though, never will heal right, but enough to move on i guess...

DCX
 
What sucks is all the movies you used to watch, things you both liked, and things you did will always crop up and make you feel like shit.
 
The pain will go away from a breakup as simply put, you were not 'meant to be.' It will be hard, but you will get over it.

I bet some good old fashioned porno would help you.
 
A night of good pizza and good 'guy movies'. Repeat until you no longer regret being single.

And sorry to hear about the breakup - that's a long time.
 
Indeed, sorry to hear about the breakup. I was in a relationship for almost 2.5 years as well, before we split a couple years ago.

I was in BAD BAD shape for a LOOONG-ass time, until a sequence of events led me to be social again. It was weird... as SOON as I started hanging out with my friends and meeting new people, I instantly felt better. So yeah.
 
GDJustin said:
Indeed, sorry to hear about the breakup. I was in a relationship for almost 2.5 years as well, before we split a couple years ago.

2.5 years seems to be a common thing.

Koshiba said:
I'd say it never goes /completely/ away. At least, with first loves. :x Since my only really bad break up I've had so far has been with my first love. :lol It doesn't really affect me badly anymore but every now and then some things still remind me and I get a little hurt from it.

This is true.
 
yea, like someone else already said, DO NOT get drunk until you're positvely sure all feelings for her are gone. if not, bad things will happen.

:lol
 
The 2.5 year mark strikes again! astro_girl and I broke up just after I landed in San Francisco for the summer (that was almost three months ago now), and it was a decision that should have been made a long time before -- we just weren't working anymore, but I was using excuses like 'I still love her' and simple pity to stop myself from going through with the act. It ended up just hurting me and her more in the end, but it's better late than never, you know?

Unlike all of you guys, though, I was totally over the relationship the minute it came to an end. Maybe it's because it's something I wanted, whereas with some of you, you were left on the other end, hoping to have the relationship come around again. I wanted out of my relationship for at least six-eight months before I actually went through with it, so it's kind of a relief at this point to be free and single - even if it means no poon.

Then again, I am going back to school in a few weeks, where the girls are in ridiculous abundance.

I still have to see her at least one more time, though. I became very close to her four sisters during the time I spent with her, and it seems asshole-ish on my part not to at least say hi/goodbye one more time. So, I'm planning on closing up that gap in the week between arriving back in Chicago and heading to school. Hopefully that's not too emotionally draining; as much as I know and feel I'm over her, who knows what it'll be like to see her again...
 
MrAngryFace said:
What sucks is all the movies you used to watch, things you both liked, and things you did will always crop up and make you feel like shit.

This is so true. :(

Time does heal though, take faith in that.

Keep yourself busy, hang out with friends, meet new people, and exercise. Basically, try to move on and take good care of yourself.

And remember: DO NOT dwell on the past or bad feelings.
 
MrAngryFace said:
What sucks is all the movies you used to watch, things you both liked, and things you did will always crop up and make you feel like shit.

god, this so true. today i watched american beauty with 4 friends, and when kevin spacey says "i think you just became my personal hero" i felt awful. that was an inside joke we had for nearly 2 years. fucking life.
 
MrAngryFace said:
What sucks is all the movies you used to watch, things you both liked, and things you did will always crop up and make you feel like shit.

I agree with everything you've said. This thread gets me depressed. All the movies I watched with my ex(like Lost In Translation, PotC etc.) I can't watch anymore because it'll just remind me of her. Hell even games I used to play in the 14 months we were going out I don't touch because it just reminds me of her.

And yeah she was a damn good GF, but I messed up, so any girl I see I automatically compare to her. The worst thing is knowing you had the opportunity but you threw it away.
 
I think I read in some psycho-babble article somewhere that people usually burn through the initial "intoxicating" feeling of being with someone in 2-3 years, normally. One of a few things happens then:

1) You accept the idea that the rest of your life isn't gonna be some fucking romance novel together and work shit out because it's important to you.
2) One person is still more invested in the relationship than the other and ends up getting a shit sandwich of a deal in the breakup(that would be the unfortunate Uno Ill Nino in this case).
3) Or you both mutually agree that it would be better that you stop seeing each other and break it off, both happy. I find this rarely happens. Someone pretty much ends up getting hurt or you settle down and have a bullshit grown up life.

Of course, if you are able to denigrate the beauty of interpersonal, intimate relations down to the Cubsfan "it's all just a chess game" mentality, then I suppose you can just go out and fuck some random dumb chick and it will all be better. Man I wish I was stupid sometimes.

Sorry, that probably didn't help. Stay busy. Yeah, that's the ticket. Moving out of state helps too.
 
I would say the first thing you could do is get off the Internet and go spend some time with some guy friends. The less you think about her for the time being- the better.
 
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