Going to bars solo and not drink alcohol. Is this allowed?

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Akahige said:
So is this bar busy? Like people standing around waiting for a seat.
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Nah I would never do that at a busy bar. I mean why do guys go alone to bars in the first place? Usually to unwind after work under the pretext of a drink while either watching sports or to socialize and meet new people/girls.
 
I rarely buy alcohol at bars, shit's too expensive for my budget, and nobody has ever said anything to me or my friend I go with that does the same.

As for being alone, my friend has gone and danced alone without buying drinks and nobody said anything, though our town only has small bars, so I don't know about bigger cities.
 
ConfusingJazz said:
But why would they kick you out for that?

An Irish coffee is alcoholic.

I am confused.

Were you in Ireland or was the bartender Irish or something?
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Well, they said it was "special". I can't say much more than that, other than it was. Oh yeah, the Bartender was Irish I think.

It was Seattle.

They didn't kick me out for getting the drink, they kicked me out for what happened after.

Apparently, I shouted the wrong slurs at the wrong bodyguard, mistaking his skin colour as a sign of dehumanizing aggression. I did this all in a Chinese accent although I speak perfect english and can't really even speak chinese although I look asian.

I had assumed he was a fundamentalist terrorist who had taken jobs from america (I am from Hong Kong, so I don't know why I was so upset about that). I think I just said this because I was upset they were not going to let me back in.

I continued for a while, and he slapped me around and choked me a few times. I wasn't that upset and was enjoying it up until I realized that my BFF was nowhere to be found after a half hour of this street performance.

I got bored, went in to pay the bill ( I was dragged in by the bouncer). I paid the sum, tipped well for their trouble, and then left.

I still don't remember why I actually got kicked out in the first place, but that's what happened after.

Anyway, I didn't like that I had made generalizations over skin colour and therefore resolved to quit drinking after that.
 
EdibleExplosives said:
That's totally foreign to me, I've never heard of anyone tipping at a bar over here. I am Scottish though, so maybe that's why.
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I wanted to make a Scottish independence joke but thought that would be in poor taste.

Something along the lines of "apparently the concept of independence is foreign to you as well."
 
Go for it. Especially once you get to know the staff, if yo tip well and are well behaved, provide good convo, etc. then it will soon be the norm. Also if you occasionally order alcohol, but just grab a coke and nachos on other nights then I am sure you'll be good and have a blast. I see nothing wrong with it.
 
Laughing Black said:
Well, they said it was "special". I can't say much more than that, other than it was. Oh yeah, the Bartender was Irish I think.

It was Seattle.

They didn't kick me out for getting the drink, they kicked me out for what happened after.

Apparently, I shouted the wrong slurs at the wrong bodyguard, mistaking his skin colour as a sign of dehumanizing aggression. I did this all in a Chinese accent although I speak perfect english and can't really even speak chinese although I look asian.

I had assumed he was a fundamentalist terrorist who had taken jobs from america (I am from Hong Kong, so I don't know why I was so upset about that). I think I just said this because I was upset they were not going to let me back in.

I continued for a while, and he slapped me around and choked me a few times. I wasn't that upset and was enjoying it up until I realized that my BFF was nowhere to be found after a half hour of this street performance.

I got bored, went in to pay the bill ( I was dragged in by the bouncer). I paid the sum, tipped well for their trouble, and then left.

I still don't remember why I actually got kicked out in the first place, but that's what happened after.

Anyway, I didn't like that I had made generalizations over skin colour and therefore resolved to quit drinking after that.
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Wait, is anyone reading this?

What?
 
Laughing Black said:
Well, they said it was "special". I can't say much more than that, other than it was. Oh yeah, the Bartender was Irish I think.

It was Seattle.

They didn't kick me out for getting the drink, they kicked me out for what happened after.

Apparently, I shouted the wrong slurs at the wrong bodyguard, mistaking his skin colour as a sign of dehumanizing aggression. I did this all in a Chinese accent although I speak perfect english and can't really even speak chinese although I look asian.

I had assumed he was a fundamentalist terrorist who had taken jobs from america (I am from Hong Kong, so I don't know why I was so upset about that). I think I just said this because I was upset they were not going to let me back in.

I continued for a while, and he slapped me around and choked me a few times. I wasn't that upset and was enjoying it up until I realized that my BFF was nowhere to be found after a half hour of this street performance.

I got bored, went in to pay the bill ( I was dragged in by the bouncer). I paid the sum, tipped well for their trouble, and then left.

I still don't remember why I actually got kicked out in the first place, but that's what happened after.

Anyway, I didn't like that I had made generalizations over skin colour and therefore resolved to quit drinking after that.
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Are you drunk at the moment?
 
Feep said:
Wait, is anyone reading this?

What?
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I don't know. I am trying to decipher everything, and it still doesn't make much sense.

He spewed racist shit, but it's ok, he is from Hong Kong. He doesn't speak in a Chinese accent, but he did. He got his ass kicked, but he enjoyed it. He doesn't know why he was bounced.

I think that's the summary?

Also, this started off when I asked him why he was kicked out for ordering an Irish coffee.
 
I've been to lots of bars that give out free soda, theoretically to reward DDs. Either that or they don't sweat the 5 cents it costs them when mixed well drinks are 1-2 bucks anyway.
 
Laughing Black said:
Well, they said it was "special". I can't say much more than that, other than it was. Oh yeah, the Bartender was Irish I think.

It was Seattle.

They didn't kick me out for getting the drink, they kicked me out for what happened after.

Apparently, I shouted the wrong slurs at the wrong bodyguard, mistaking his skin colour as a sign of dehumanizing aggression. I did this all in a Chinese accent although I speak perfect english and can't really even speak chinese although I look asian.

I had assumed he was a fundamentalist terrorist who had taken jobs from america (I am from Hong Kong, so I don't know why I was so upset about that). I think I just said this because I was upset they were not going to let me back in.

I continued for a while, and he slapped me around and choked me a few times. I wasn't that upset and was enjoying it up until I realized that my BFF was nowhere to be found after a half hour of this street performance.

I got bored, went in to pay the bill ( I was dragged in by the bouncer). I paid the sum, tipped well for their trouble, and then left.

I still don't remember why I actually got kicked out in the first place, but that's what happened after.

Anyway, I didn't like that I had made generalizations over skin colour and therefore resolved to quit drinking after that.
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You sound like a dickhead.
 
If in doubt order a mix drink, say a rum and coke, then let the run evaporate over time and then you can enjoy your de-alcoholed coke
 
Laughing Black said:
Apparently, I shouted the wrong slurs at the wrong bodyguard, mistaking his skin colour as a sign of dehumanizing aggression. I did this all in a Chinese accent although I speak perfect english and can't really even speak chinese although I look asian.

...

I still don't remember why I actually got kicked out in the first place, but that's what happened after.
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I'm pretty sure yelling racist bullshit to a bouncer will get you kicked out of almost any bar.
 
LyleLanley said:
I'm pretty sure yelling racist bullshit to a bouncer will get you kicked out of almost any bar.
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Yeah, of course I know that.

I said I used racism to try and get back in the door out of frustration.

I also tried the backdoor, but they were watching that one. They know my move.

Anyway, who cares? It was a long time ago. I just wanted to support anyone here who wanted to put down the drink. Let's get behind that and not this silly drama, huh?

Say no to drugs!
 
Laughing Black said:
Well, they said it was "special". I can't say much more than that, other than it was. Oh yeah, the Bartender was Irish I think.

It was Seattle.

They didn't kick me out for getting the drink, they kicked me out for what happened after.

Apparently, I shouted the wrong slurs at the wrong bodyguard, mistaking his skin colour as a sign of dehumanizing aggression. I did this all in a Chinese accent although I speak perfect english and can't really even speak chinese although I look asian.

I had assumed he was a fundamentalist terrorist who had taken jobs from america (I am from Hong Kong, so I don't know why I was so upset about that). I think I just said this because I was upset they were not going to let me back in.

I continued for a while, and he slapped me around and choked me a few times. I wasn't that upset and was enjoying it up until I realized that my BFF was nowhere to be found after a half hour of this street performance.

I got bored, went in to pay the bill ( I was dragged in by the bouncer). I paid the sum, tipped well for their trouble, and then left.

I still don't remember why I actually got kicked out in the first place, but that's what happened after.

Anyway, I didn't like that I had made generalizations over skin colour and therefore resolved to quit drinking after that.
Click to expand...

nothing really ever is exactly as it seems
 
Laughing Black said:
Well, they said it was "special". I can't say much more than that, other than it was. Oh yeah, the Bartender was Irish I think.

It was Seattle.

They didn't kick me out for getting the drink, they kicked me out for what happened after.

Apparently, I shouted the wrong slurs at the wrong bodyguard, mistaking his skin colour as a sign of dehumanizing aggression. I did this all in a Chinese accent although I speak perfect english and can't really even speak chinese although I look asian.

I had assumed he was a fundamentalist terrorist who had taken jobs from america (I am from Hong Kong, so I don't know why I was so upset about that). I think I just said this because I was upset they were not going to let me back in.

I continued for a while, and he slapped me around and choked me a few times. I wasn't that upset and was enjoying it up until I realized that my BFF was nowhere to be found after a half hour of this street performance.

I got bored, went in to pay the bill ( I was dragged in by the bouncer). I paid the sum, tipped well for their trouble, and then left.

I still don't remember why I actually got kicked out in the first place, but that's what happened after.

Anyway, I didn't like that I had made generalizations over skin colour and therefore resolved to quit drinking after that.
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This is amazing.
 
Amjad said:
This is amazing.
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Oh, thank you!

Yeah, sometimes its important to recognize that there are known knowns, known unknowns, unknown knowns, and unknown unknowns. When it comes to harbouring subconscious preconceptions against others that would be the basis for aggression, why not take the most sentry-like approach and assume you know nothing about the extent of your own preconceptions? Always watch your mind, then you won't be racist! Or at least, have a better chance of not being racist?

Anyway, what do I know? I'm not a social worker or psychologist or anything, this is just something I learned while being dehumanized, I mean introduced to my own inhumanity against myself. I wasn't going to go by the rules of my preconceptions and judge on appearance anymore. Oh, no sirree. The last thing you want is for someone who outweighs you by a good 80 lbs to find your comments boring or repetitive, or hostile.

People get angry for that. I like to go to bars still, but now I smile warmly and try not to step on any toes and maybe have fun if there's the opportunity. But mostly, I just like to relax and enjoy open mic at the bars.

Oh sure, I'm not perfect. There have been times where I've slipped in the recent past. But, nobody's perfect. Just keep trying is all I can do and be of the humble opinion that I should never think I ever know what the fuck is going on because otherwise I'll get fixated and end up preconceiving again.

Just try to do right by others whether or not they appear to you as menacing or not.

So, there you go.
 
I actually have personal experience with this subject. I work at a bar (as a karaoke host, not a bartender--but I am DLC certified) and we had this guy who kept coming in just to hang out. He would get nothing but water and just watch karaoke and mingle around the bar. It started making the bartenders uncomfortable and frustrating them because he was never there with people, so it's not like he was a DD (which they have no problems with, drink responsibly). He would just creepily walk around and talk to random girls, and after about a week or two the staff wanted a reason to not let him back in but nobody had directly complained--which my girlfriend immediately did upon hearing that because he would often walk up and start talking to her when I was otherwise occupied.

TL;DR - People go to bars to drink. Going there and not ordering drinks only weirds people out and pisses off the staff.
 
As long as you're paying them they shouldn't care. I have seen someone get kicked out for just ordering water though.
 
Laughing Black said:
Well, they said it was "special". I can't say much more than that, other than it was. Oh yeah, the Bartender was Irish I think.

It was Seattle.

They didn't kick me out for getting the drink, they kicked me out for what happened after.

Apparently, I shouted the wrong slurs at the wrong bodyguard, mistaking his skin colour as a sign of dehumanizing aggression. I did this all in a Chinese accent although I speak perfect english and can't really even speak chinese although I look asian.

I had assumed he was a fundamentalist terrorist who had taken jobs from america (I am from Hong Kong, so I don't know why I was so upset about that). I think I just said this because I was upset they were not going to let me back in.

I continued for a while, and he slapped me around and choked me a few times. I wasn't that upset and was enjoying it up until I realized that my BFF was nowhere to be found after a half hour of this street performance.

I got bored, went in to pay the bill ( I was dragged in by the bouncer). I paid the sum, tipped well for their trouble, and then left.

I still don't remember why I actually got kicked out in the first place, but that's what happened after.

Anyway, I didn't like that I had made generalizations over skin colour and therefore resolved to quit drinking after that.
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Is this post performance art as well
 
neurosisxeno said:
I actually have personal experience with this subject. I work at a bar (as a karaoke host, not a bartender--but I am DLC certified) and we had this guy who kept coming in just to hang out. He would get nothing but water and just watch karaoke and mingle around the bar. It started making the bartenders uncomfortable and frustrating them because he was never there with people, so it's not like he was a DD (which they have no problems with, drink responsibly). He would just creepily walk around and talk to random girls, and after about a week or two the staff wanted a reason to not let him back in but nobody had directly complained--which my girlfriend immediately did upon hearing that because he would often walk up and start talking to her when I was otherwise occupied.

TL;DR - People go to bars to drink. Going there and not ordering drinks only weirds people out and pisses off the staff.
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Yeah that's what I thought. But this is just for going out alone on weekdays after gym and work. I maybe have 2 hours after I hit the gym. Only been in NYC 3 weeks and I'm already noticing a dangerous habit of going out for those 2 hours and having like 4 drinks.

I guess I could do the soda and bar food, bit why does bar food always have to be so damn unhealthy.

Of course on weekends I go out actually drinking. I've just gotten this obsession since moving to NYC to always go out and try and find the best bars for each night of the week.
 
supergiz said:
I guess I could do the soda and bar food, bit why does bar food always have to be so damn unhealthy.
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It really depends on the bar. If it's a dive bar (basically the one I mentioned) unless they have other stuff going on just going there to hangout puts people off. But if they have food and such if you go there and get a few sodas and maybe some food I doubt they would care. The environment also changes how people percieve you in a situation.
 
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