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Im having trouble getting into the friend zone.

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S

StoOgE

First tragedy, then farce.
This might be the first time this has ever happened to a guy, ever. But there is a girl that I really just want to be friends with.. and I cant tell you why, because she is really attractive.. but she just has some personality quircky I can deal with in a friend but not someone I see all the damn time.

In any case, we went to a concert a couple weeks ago because she has the same musical taste as me, but doesnt go to many concerts.. I thought it would be nice.. but the whole time I was getting a "this is a date" vibe from her... so I just stayed away for 3 or so weeks... talked to her online or when I saw her at mutual friends houses or whatever.. but didnt really talk to her..

after figuring she had given up on me, I asked her to go to a coffee shop with some of my friends.. and my friends being a-holes (and knowing the situation) decided to no show... and now I know she is being led on horribly.. she sat there playing with her hair as though she would die if she stopped.. she kept touching my leg and elbow.. and when we ordered food told the waiter we would just eat off the same plate (which bothers me anyway, its just not sanitary)..

the only thing I know to try is to tell her she is like a sister or bang one of her friends... cubsfan, please help me.. I cant turn off the cocky funny..
 
S

SlickWilly223

Time ta STEP IT UP
Have you tried being fuck buddys? I'm serious, here.

You think she's hot, and you want to be her friend... but you don't want a deep relationship.

Perfect candidate for a fuck buddy.
 
S

SpeedingUptoStop

will totally Facebook friend you! *giggle* *LOL*
Tell her you're gay, then tell her to keep it a secret. It's something I wouldn't do, but if you're desperate to get her away from you, that should work.
 
E

evil ways

Member
Badabing said:
Have you tried being fuck buddys? I'm serious, here.

You think she's hot, and you want to be her friend... but you don't want a deep relationship.

Perfect candidate for a fuck buddy.
Click to expand...

If he does tap that ass, he runs the risk of the girl thinking that said tapping of her ass is a commitment by him.
 
S

StoOgE

First tragedy, then farce.
cubicle47b said:
Why don't you try telling her you're not interested in dating but would still like to be friends?
Click to expand...

this isnt an option.. namely because I havent ever asked her out or actually said I am intrested in her.. and neither has she.. but she is allready planning us going on a vacation together this summer :lol so, if I say "hey, I just want to be friends" she could turn it on me and say "wait, I thought we were just friends" and make me look like an ass.
 
A

Andy787

Banned
How about you tap the proverbial anus, and then tell her that you are gay. That way, she will feel guilty for the rest of her life for turning you into a homosexual, and will continue to be your friend for as long as you so desire out of sheer guilt and depression. And then when you feel the need to move on, or you have come to dislike her and wish to part ways, she will just go ahead and shoot herself in the face, making a quick and painless exit out of the relationship on your part. Win win situation, my friend.
 
I

Iceman

Member
(eh, I'm no help.)

Basically, have the friend conversation with her and be honest. You really like her but there are things that can't be changed that prevents you from pursuing a romantic relationship. It works.

Better to be clear then to let these kind of twisted feelings develop on their own.
 
F

Fuzzy

I would bang a hot farmer!
StoOgE said:
this isnt an option.. namely because I havent ever asked her out or actually said I am intrested in her.. and neither has she.. but she is allready planning us going on a vacation together this summer :lol so, if I say "hey, I just want to be friends" she could turn it on me and say "wait, I thought we were just friends" and make me look like an ass.
Click to expand...
I'll actually be helpful, ask her if you can bring your new girlfriend (just make her up) on the summer vacation together. She'll get the idea that you're just friends really quickly or she'll think you want to have a three-way and be into it in which case it's time to find another willing party. :D
 
N

NLB2

Banned
Fuck buddies. Fuck buddies. Fuck buddies. And wear a condom. Crazy girls aren't a problem as long as they're not pregnant/drug addicted potential murderers.
 
A

android

Theoretical Magician
StoOgE said:
this isnt an option.. namely because I havent ever asked her out or actually said I am intrested in her.. and neither has she.. but she is allready planning us going on a vacation together this summer :lol so, if I say "hey, I just want to be friends" she could turn it on me and say "wait, I thought we were just friends" and make me look like an ass.
Click to expand...
Maybe she does just want to be friends as well and doesn't see going away together as a romantic thing.
 
Dice

Dice

Pokémon Parentage Conspiracy Theorist
Dude, your whole problem is assumptions, don't assume. Just go with it, make sure to talk about other girls you like, and if something comes up later plead ignorance, namely because you are yet ignorant of her feelings. Hints/vibes are always uncertain--hence the common problem of guys finding out they are in the friend zone.
 
K

Kuro Madoushi

Unconfirmed Member
This is always hard...

Attraction isn't conscious, it's subconscious so you'd have to do little things to annoy her to make her like you less.

You could try being honest with her, but don't try to break it to her nicely something like:
"I find you attractive but..."
is terrible as it leaves the door open, makes you a Challenge, which girls love, and only really sends a mixed signal...

But you can always tell her straight up that you're afraid of ruining a friendship

The other more sinister way (that will get you Dark Side Points) is that you could lie to her or act like an asshole (basically the cocky - the funny)

Tell her you smoke? drink? only want to have sex and no relationship? complain bitterly about your ex's to her? tell her you like? hate? homosexuals? (opposite of her view) Tell her you support or are against abortion? (again opposite of what she feels)

As you can tell, best way to piss someone off is to get political, clingy, or bitter. Works like a charm anytime...
 
G

GG-Duo

Member
This calls for Reverse Cocky and Funny.

What you need to do is love her, and treat her like a special girl that's dear to your heart.
 
L

Litigation Manuel

Member
Do the only thing you can do: start peeing in the shower. Based on my observations, it should work. And if you already do, then I don't even know what to think anymore.
 
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