Let's talk about catcalling

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pashmilla

Banned
Y'all know how I love my
overly
provocative discussion threads! Inspired partially by that female cyclist thread where fellow girl Gaffers shared their experiences of being catcalled. Some people were like "wow the level of catcalling in that video was almost sexual assault/harassment!" so I'll say it straight up

👏 catcalling 👏 is 👏 sexual 👏 harassment 👏

I expect some people on Gaf have done it, even if they won't admit to it. So let's get this straight: wolf-whistling as I walk past doesn't make me feel flattered, it makes me feel violated and gross. Yelling "heyy lady!!" as you ride past me on your bicycle doesn't make me want to sleep with you, it makes me want to punt you into traffic. Asking me if my titties are cold doesn't make me think you're so witty and funny, it makes me want to knock you off your bike. Telling me to "smile, you're pretty" doesn't make me feel pretty, it makes me feel self-conscious about how I look and reinforces the notion that a woman's only value lies in her appearance. Beeping at me as you drive past just scares me.

My friends and I got honked at once on our way to a school disco. We were 13. Do you realise how profoundly messed up that is?

So if you ever think to yourself "hey, maybe I should catcall that girl!" here's a tip: DON'T!!! FUCKING!!! DO!!! IT!!!

And if you ever forget this handy tip, watch this video and remind urself that catcalling is for scumbags
 
I predict 99% "yeah it's terrible" posts until one person writes an "actually" post or objects to a specific complaint in the OP, then it's 75% dogpiling on them and 25% people still replying "yeah it's terrible" to the OP as if nothing is going on.

Anyway, it's terrible.
 
pashmilla said:
Inspired partially by that female cyclist thread where fellow girl Gaffers shared their experiences of being catcalled. Some people were like "wow the level of catcalling in that video was almost sexual assault/harassment!" so I'll say it straight up
Click to expand...

In that video, the attempts to block her from riding past and trying to grab her were much more than catcalling (unless the people you mention were solely talking about the verbal harassment).
 
uncelestial said:
I predict 99% "yeah it's terrible" posts until one person writes an "actually" post or objects to a specific complaint in the OP, then it's 75% dogpiling on them and 25% people still replying "yeah it's terrible" to the OP as if nothing is going on.
Click to expand...

Oh I know some dickhead will probably come in and defend it. I'm curious to see how they'll try.
 
Did it as a kid and soon discovered I'm too good-looking for it.

Men only catcall/wolfwhistle women they can't get in bed with.
 
I've never felt the need to catcall, personally. I've seen guys do it and I just think it's pathetic and desperate.
 
Holy shit. Everything is sexual harassment nowadays. Catcalling is nothing, just ignore it and move on.

And that video doesn't prove or show anything.
 
uncelestial said:
I predict 99% "yeah it's terrible" posts until one person writes an "actually" post or objects to a specific complaint in the OP, then it's 75% dogpiling on them and 25% people still replying "yeah it's terrible" to the OP as if nothing is going on.

Anyway, it's terrible.
Click to expand...

Well actually...

it is terrible and something I will never understand. What's wrong with actually approaching somebody and striking up a conversation like a normal human being instead of behaving like some neanderthalic meathead?

Edit: oh shit there it is right above my post.

dgbg.gif
 
Catcalling IS sexual harassment. Imagine someone doing that to your daughter or wife, or mother. If it feels wrong, its wrong.
 
It is rude af and also really pathetic. Besides that I don't think it has ever 'worked' in the history of mankind.
 
Never understood how anyone could catcall and not see themselves as an asshole. "Oh yeah this person is attractive let me just harass them instead of trying to attempt a conversation".
 
Thanks for saying this, Pashmilla.


At the end of Michael Che's stand up special he starts going on a turn and defending catcalling, even going so far as to say women are lucky if that's all that happens. Suffice to say it was appalling and in terrible taste.

When has catcalling ever been successful? When has it ever achieved anything besides make everyone feel gross?


StaticJam said:
Never understood how anyone could catcall and not see themselves as an asshole. "Oh yeah this person is attractive let me just harass them instead of trying to attempt a conversation".
Click to expand...

Some men don't seem to think of it as harassment. "How can being flattered possibly be a bad thing?"
 
Never felt like I wanted to do it. Mutual eye-contact with strangers is so much hotter.

Btw this is the girl on bike video. Delicious at the end.
 
Tence said:
It is rude af and also really pathetic. Besides that I don't think it has ever 'worked' in the history of mankind.
Click to expand...

I'm sure it worked before we evolved to become what we are today. But man... Why even go there?

Skyzard said:
Never felt like I wanted to do it. Mutual eye-contact with strangers is so much hotter.
Click to expand...

There's a thin line between what you might think is mutual eye contact and straight up staring. If you're making eye contact with me for more than a few seconds without saying anything then that's just fucking weird and creepy.
 
AllGamer said:
Holy shit. Everything is sexual harassment nowadays. Catcalling is nothing, just ignore it and move on.

And that video doesn't prove or show anything.
Click to expand...

Catcalling may not be very physically or mentally significant, but it is still sexual harassment.

AllGamer said:
No, it's not...

I'm not even defending it. Guys who do this only want to get attention and they are probably never successful but come on, its far from sexual harassment.
Click to expand...

giphy.gif
 
GHG said:
There's a thin line between what you might think is mutual eye contact and straight up staring. If you're making eye contact with me for more than a few seconds without saying anything then that's just fucking weird and creepy.
Click to expand...

Lol, I'm not advocating going around staring people down. You can tell when someone is looking at you, you can look back and smile.
 
pashmilla said:
Y'all know how I love my
overly
provocative discussion threads! Inspired partially by that female cyclist thread where fellow girl Gaffers shared their experiences of being catcalled. Some people were like "wow the level of catcalling in that video was almost sexual assault/harassment!" so I'll say it straight up

�� catcalling �� is �� sexual �� harassment ��

I expect some people on Gaf have done it, even if they won't admit to it. So let's get this straight: wolf-whistling as I walk past doesn't make me feel flattered, it makes me feel violated and gross. Yelling "heyy lady!!" as you ride past me on your bicycle doesn't make me want to sleep with you, it makes me want to punt you into traffic. Asking me if my titties are cold doesn't make me think you're so witty and funny, it makes me want to knock you off your bike. Telling me to "smile, you're pretty" doesn't make me feel pretty, it makes me feel self-conscious about how I look and reinforces the notion that a woman's only value lies in her appearance. Beeping at me as you drive past just scares me.

My friends and I got honked at once on our way to a school disco. We were 13. Do you realise how profoundly messed up that is?

So if you ever think to yourself "hey, maybe I should catcall that girl!" here's a tip: DON'T!!! FUCKING!!! DO!!! IT!!!

And if you ever forget this handy tip, watch this video and remind urself that catcalling is for scumbags
Click to expand...

I get your point op. I've spoken many times with my girl about this and personally she doesn't care, but I can understand that for many this feels bad. I would never do it. There is a big difference though between "hey lady" and your "titties are cold" imo.
 
That video never fails to shock me at how disgusting and creepy people can be.

Have some respect for your fellow human beings, have some respect for yourself. Jesus Christ.
 
Cat calling like any sexual harassment is done by men who only spend time around other men and their sole experiences with the opposite sex is in romantic situations.
 
I can barely stand unsolicited conversation, so I can only imagine how much more unwelcome catcalling can be.

zoukka said:
Cat calling like any sexual harassment is done by men who only spend time around other men and their sole experiences with the opposite sex is in romantic situations.
Click to expand...

Don't you mean 'people', as in 'women too'? Because that can happen.
 
It's definitely sexual harassement.

Never felt the urge to do it so I can't really relate.

My ex always said she liked it, though. But she also hated feminism passionately.
 
Anyone else listen to TAL episode where a journalist spent like a week trying to convince a guy to stop catcalling and he just wouldn't budge or admit their is something wrong with it (well he did then toke it back)
 
AllGamer said:
No, it's not...

I'm not even defending it. Guys who do this only want to get attention and they are probably never successful but come on, its far from sexual harassment.
Click to expand...

Sexual harassment isn't just the overt stuff. There are degrees to it, and labelling catcalling correctly as sexual harassment doesn't diminish the severity of the term. It's all awful. It's kinda sad calling people out gets such a push back.
 
I'd like to know if catcalling has been successful for anyone ever
There has to be SOME reason why it proliferates
 
Surely everyone who uses as internet forum such as NeoGAF has a moral compass that points a certain way. I doubt anyone on NeoGAF has or ever will have cat called anyone. It's stupid and it makes people feel uncomfortable.
 
I used to date a model in South America and not only would she get catcalled in front of me, they were quite colorful and "creative" about it too.

(loosely translated from Spanish) "Hey gorgeous, for you I'd become a widow."

This was the waiter serving us at the restaurant. :/

Eventually I got used to it and even came up with snarky replies of my own to counter.

But OP, I do have a question for you: is there a nice and / or respectable way to tell a woman that she is stunning?

I was at a gallery exhibit recently and there was a beautiful Russian woman greeter in her early twenties and I just told her that she was really stunningly gorgeous (when she was not busy greeting, if course) . She appreciated the compliment. Then we exchanged contact information.

Is that acceptable in your book?
 
Any guys here ever get it?

I have several times, I'm not even (that?) handsome. Always it was a group of women, never single. often alcohol was clearly involved but not every time. Usually girls from the.. rougher side.

Also once some teenagers decided to come up to me and call me ugly to my face. I took her open can of beer off her and walked up the road drinking it. Now that's a public service.

I remember my ex telling me about an incident with a guy, a little after I left her off to walk a little home as i went my way. I was so pissed off, I would have knocked the fucker out. Of course, it didn't happen while I was there. Cowardice and Catcalling are bedfellows.
 
No wonder women are always worried to go out alone in their city/town or travel abroad alone. Fuck catcalling and any form of harassment. Can't people just stick to their business and not bother anyone!? damn. What's the point anyway?!
 
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