YES. We are in the same position. Our son is the first grandchild on either side and, while both my husband and I each have a sibling, both of our siblings have indicated they are leaning towards not having children (although I'm not sure they're completed decided). Still, it's looking like our kiddo may be the one and only.
My side of the family has been pretty good about just buying small toys, clothes and books, but my in-laws are going NUTS. While I've suggested scaling things back, they seem hyper aware this may be their only grandchild (or nephew as the case may be) and they don't want to miss out on buying 50,000 things for him. I think they're coming at it from the perspective that every item is their ONE chance to see a grandchild [insert activity here]. I've been pretty vocal about wanting to de-clutter, but it means nothing. Every time I get one thing packed away, something else pops up to take its place!
LOL. I hope every one is this gun ho about contributing to a college fund in 17 years.
That's a really good idea! I'm positive my FIL is going to want to buy a set of drums for kiddo some day. That can definitely stay at Grandpa's.
I am just now getting out of the "million gifts from every relative" phase with my kids (first two grandkids/nephews on both sides). Here are things that occasionally worked for us though you may get push back and grief.
1) Every Christmas and birthday verbally make a rule with your family that they can get one gift. You have to do it every single time. Some will break the rule, but that will be the exception and not the norm.
2) Suggest a single higher-end gift that forces people to go in together.
3) For every new toy, animal, or whatever else, you have to get rid of two. Goodwill, garbage, whatever.
4) If you have storage space, only open a couple of presents at a time. Put the rest away and open a few more in a month or two. Kids won't even notice if they are young.
5) Finally, just get used to it. I spent two hours today with my 6 and 9 year old de-cluttering their play room of all the crap that had accumulated since the last de-cluttering three months ago. Even with no presents, toys find a way to sneak into the house. Most of it is cheap, disposable crap that brought minutes of joy at most. When you reflect on the consumerism and the waste it can make you really sad. When I buy gifts for my nieces and nephews, I make a huge effort to keep it small with some sort of redeeming educational value (books, circuits, an experience, etc).
I tried pitching to family, that we downscale Christmas this year, in anticipation of another FLOOD of toys and I literally was BOOED.
This sucks big time, but the reality is it is your house and your son. Ultimately, you will be judged fairly or not, for what type of human being he becomes. It sucks that your family can not support you in such an important area of child rearing.