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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!
- Thread starter AlimNassor
- Start date
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TheKaeptain
Banned
A lot of older than 30 women.
Presumably for the same reason many men wouldn't want women to put pictures of them in their bikinis or displaying as much cleavage as possible on these sites?
Devolution
Member
Oh those exist? All kidding aside bodies are nothing to be ashamed of though =(.
Absolutely, shame isn't the problem. This isn't a moral concern.
I would use a word like "shallow" or "superficial." It isn't morally wrong; it's just intellectually vapid, which is something I consider critically erroneous for romantic purposes. If superficial concerns like your body are so important to you that they are among the first things you show to "sell" yourself to me, then we probably have such significantly different worldviews that further romantic investigation is not warranted.
And yes, absolutely, men like this exist. I've dated a morbidly obese woman; I've dated a ballerina who weighed noticeably below 100 pounds; I've dated tall girls and short girls, girls who were considered traditionally very good looking and girls who were not. I show no discernible preferences in regards to the physical traits of my romantic interests. It isn't that I don't care at all -- I can hardly claim perfect philosophical asceticism -- but it's very far down my list of priorities and I certainly know other men who fit that description as well. Again, if a girl were to consider her body a primary feature to attract my interest, then we likely would not be compatible.
Devolution
Member
so this thread got me interested in the site.
answered quite a few questions. put up a profile. added a few pics..
looked around and messaged quite a number of girls on Sunday
not one message back yet
also, my area for some reason has so many fat chicks available? wtf
These two posts juxtaposed make for a hilarious read.
manipulate
Member
Doesn't vapid mean boring?
Also, the phrase 'critically erroneous for romantic purposes' is magnificent
I say go for it, man. I feel like there's almost nothing a girl can do at a coffee shop to really excite me. I want to see her in action, as it were.A guy just invited me to an athiest meetup/rally
as a first date.
I kind of want to go. Every date I've had, the guy was just too.... ugh.... boring.
I need a better way to meet hot, weird guys.
Like Cheezmo
A guy just invited me to an athiest meetup/rally
as a first date.
I kind of want to go. Every date I've had, the guy was just too.... ugh.... boring.
I need a better way to meet hot, weird guys.
Like Cheezmo
yeah go put that unholy water to work!
RedAssedApe
Banned
For some reason it really bugs me when people write "works hard plays hard" in their profile.
A guy just invited me to an athiest meetup/rally
as a first date.
I kind of want to go. Every date I've had, the guy was just too.... ugh.... boring.
I need a better way to meet hot, weird guys.
Like Cheezmo
nothing sounds more exciting than a rally made up of people standing around not believing in anything...
im being silly, i dont know what the hell goes on in an athiest rally...im sure it's like reddit, but in real life and minus pictures of cats and dogs
A guy just invited me to an athiest meetup/rally
as a first date.
I kind of want to go. Every date I've had, the guy was just too.... ugh.... boring.
I need a better way to meet hot, weird guys.
Like Cheezmo
An atheist rally sounds ungodly boring. And I'm atheist!
No, I admit it sounds boring as all hell, hence the skepticism; I just like the idea of a nontraditional first date.
I dislike getting to know people by going to dinner, and I always feel obligated to split the bill despite being "the girl". >.> Going broke quickly here.
This too!
I second the ">.>" face at that comment. About being "the girl".
TheKaeptain
Banned
You get drunk and try to fuck the cutie that is by herself.
Well, a couple of pages back I commented saying this girl I was chatting too just stopped replying to me for no reason. I thought it was done and finished. But just then I get a message saying she's been super busy this week and hasn't had time to chat and she'll send a proper longer reply soon.
I disagree. If you have a great body and want to show it off a bit then by all means do it. If you're proud of something, why cover it up? It's like a video game. You might see it and think "Wow! That looks incredible!" but then when you play it, you realize it's shallow and pretty boring and the impressive visuals wear off. But, if it DOES have depth to it and is fun to play, then the visuals enhance that experience. I met a woman who was a stripper, she had an amazing body. But also, the reason she was a stripper was to pay for her university fees because she was in her final year of becoming a scientist(forget which area now). She was really intelligent and could hold a conversation easily.
I think looks and intelligence are both important. I couldn't date a morbidly obese woman because it shows she doesn't care enough about her self and has little pride. However, I also couldn't date a complete bimbo in a serious relationship. I'm not saying I only date hot stripper scientists(though I would if I could!) but there needs to be balance in both areas.
I disagree. If you have a great body and want to show it off a bit then by all means do it. If you're proud of something, why cover it up? It's like a video game. You might see it and think "Wow! That looks incredible!" but then when you play it, you realize it's shallow and pretty boring and the impressive visuals wear off. But, if it DOES have depth to it and is fun to play, then the visuals enhance that experience. I met a woman who was a stripper, she had an amazing body. But also, the reason she was a stripper was to pay for her university fees because she was in her final year of becoming a scientist(forget which area now). She was really intelligent and could hold a conversation easily.
I think looks and intelligence are both important. I couldn't date a morbidly obese woman because it shows she doesn't care enough about her self and has little pride. However, I also couldn't date a complete bimbo in a serious relationship. I'm not saying I only date hot stripper scientists(though I would if I could!) but there needs to be balance in both areas.
storafötter
Member
I absolutely agree. I want to give everyone a fair chance as the personality matters more for me, as people are way too focused on appearances.
Castor Krieg
Banned
Wow, that is a lot of crap from someone who tries to rationalize himself/herself/other people not caring about themselves.
Very rarely people are just ugly. Most of the time they simply don't wear make-up, don't exercise, do not follow hygiene regimen.
Caring about your body is not "intellectually vapid", I consider it essential for a person. Like it or not, our physical appearance is what others see first. Also, to use your example of morbidly obese woman - was it humanitarian reasons? What kind of relationship would you have with a person that is destroying her health on purpose? What does that say about her?
storafötter;36282159 said:
Didn't you consider that maybe people are not too much focused on appearance, you are simply not focused enough?
storafötter
Member
I am not naive because all my life I have seen how people are quite shallow. It is not difficult to find an example of how shallow people are. Just listen to what people talk about on public transport, at work or during a class. It is not only teenagers and kids discussing the same things.
To be attracted to someone and follow that attraction is nothing wrong, but the way people make out of things is another. I am not trying to say that it is wrong at all to look at appearance, but I am more offended by the way people make other feel miserable and not wanted since they don't fit a certain "criteria".
People like to talk loud and "confident" about how imperfect someone else is and expect better of others than themselves. We often rarely try to see beauty in several things and measure partners according to a set of high standards. Like we could nitpick about the most ridiculous and minor aspect of someones appearance. May it be sharp knees, toes, fingers, nose, brows, breast, hair and the list goes on. Even if some are more accepting it doesn't change the way they speak about others among friends and relatives. If someone happens to be "ugly" people often act as if its a threat to their existence. It is not only humourous that some people are not attractive, but also offensive to those who are concerned of that.
I think people should give someone a better chance than what maybe the first impression gives with their high standards.
The Technomancer
card-carrying scientician
Well I have gotten two dates in the past two months, but neither of them went spectacularly well. I mean, not bad, but just "I can tell I have no interest in this person, nice as they may be". Still, progress!
Live, Laugh, Love
okcupid never worked out for me. seems only older white guys seem to message me though i know they probably message a lot of people to see if they find someone who answers back. thinking about putting someoone else's photograph on my profile and lying a bit and see what happens.
Ugh, I just got douche chills.
Power Glove
Member
PM to me for an automatic 5 star rating!
Oh and my date went well. We had fun at the arcade but like I predicted, she kicked my ass at almost everything there. I kept bugging her if she was a regular and she was like "ughh.. nooo. hehehe" I might have done better if I didn't have a huge glass of wine at the restaurant we went to earlier.
RedAssedApe
Banned
haha...good so its not just me sounding like a jerk.
You're gonna make yourself seem more attractive and appealing to see if you get more messages?
Seems like a pointless experiment.
Attackthebase
Member
A guy just invited me to an athiest meetup/rally
as a first date.
I kind of want to go. Every date I've had, the guy was just too.... ugh.... boring.
I need a better way to meet hot, weird guys.
Like Cheezmo
Wait a minute, are you going to the rally in DC?
I had those type of dates a few times. I usually drop them after the initial date when that happens, no reason to waste each other time.
Power Glove
Member
A guy just invited me to an athiest meetup/rally
as a first date.
I kind of want to go. Every date I've had, the guy was just too.... ugh.... boring.
I need a better way to meet hot, weird guys.
Like Cheezmo
This 99% match I talked to earlier this week is going also. I didn't hear about it until she mentioned it. If I had contacted her a week earlier, I definitely would have gone. Sounds awesome
I need some advice here. I can't tell if this is a scam or not. I'm on another dating site too and it's a paying site. You can do everything for free but to send full emails, you have to pay a fee.
So I get a "kiss"(a generic free message) from one girl. She only has one picture(and not of her face) and she's from another city. So already, it seems a bit odd she's even contacting me. I send another kiss back asking to see her face. No reply. So I assumed it was just bullshit and moved on. About 5 days on, today, I get an EMAIL from her. She says she's coming to my city over Easter and wanted to meet someone to show her around and gave me her phone number. However, the picture she gave was off-site. Which screams "scam". But why should they want to meet, give their number and pay real money to e-mail me if that was the case? It doesn't make sense. Like what the hell would they gain? "Haha, you went to a bar and no body showed up"? They'd pay for that?
This is the message: http://i.imgur.com/nIgbH.jpg
So I get a "kiss"(a generic free message) from one girl. She only has one picture(and not of her face) and she's from another city. So already, it seems a bit odd she's even contacting me. I send another kiss back asking to see her face. No reply. So I assumed it was just bullshit and moved on. About 5 days on, today, I get an EMAIL from her. She says she's coming to my city over Easter and wanted to meet someone to show her around and gave me her phone number. However, the picture she gave was off-site. Which screams "scam". But why should they want to meet, give their number and pay real money to e-mail me if that was the case? It doesn't make sense. Like what the hell would they gain? "Haha, you went to a bar and no body showed up"? They'd pay for that?
This is the message: http://i.imgur.com/nIgbH.jpg
Well she says it's Ellen but it also says that in the photo she sent me. I dunno, somethings just rubbing me the wrong way about it. Why wouldn't she have a photo of her face on her profile? Maybe I'm just being paranoid seeing as it's normally me making the first contact rather than the other way.
BeautifulMemory
Member
Hahahaha, why the hell do people do that? Do they not realize it's dead before it even starts?
No talent when it comes to Swedish region. I have not met one single person(date that is). A few chats, a lot of profiles are lesbians, or bisexuals looking for effeminate guys or maybe I just suck at it. Not sure. I am not Swedish so that might also play some roll, to some extent.
I don't think I am ugly. I guess I just suck that's it.
I don't think I am ugly. I guess I just suck that's it.
jokingbird
Member
I remember dating on okc. I met up with someone who used an old photo with flattering angles. I felt extremely shallow and awkward for three hours hanging out with someone who was around 150 pounds heavier than I expected.
hilarious
Bay Maximus
Banned
Holy hell, that's like another person. Ah well, builds character.
RedAssedApe
Banned
That's like that movie Shallow Hal.
jokingbird
Member
Yeah, that was a long night because I know they knew what was not being said the entire time. I just kept wanting to pretend that I was not having a problem with it, but I ignored any future date offers from them.
ElectricBlue187
Member
just call her but don't use your personal phone just in case its a scam so they can't text you BS all day long
Significantly more acne and less muscle mass than was expected =\ ohwell, he was still really nice.
Time to date a gaffer.
BeautifulMemory
Member
Ahh well atvleast he was nice...and perhaps he just hasn't worked out in a bit
Well, I was actually doing some
Kinda scary how you can do that but useful. So I think she's legit...but I'll stay vigilant.
I'm into skydiving, parties, wild nights and athletic with a 6 pack, girl.
This is me:
Pick you up 'round 8.
Spider from Mars
tap that thorax
So, how much bullshit is the "you are hot!" email that OkCupid sends out? I made a profile a couple of weeks ago just to fuck around (literally and figuratively) and have been doing ok (averaging 28 visitors a week), but I still see a while lot of unfortunate looking ladies in my quiver and matches. It still makes me sad when I get no response from people, I respond to everybody who messages me because I feel bad otherwise.
Afaik, it means something non-trivial you're in a city, but it's almost meaningless otherwise, and scales to the top 50% of users in a given area.
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