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[Twilight Gap]

That's one way to describe my mom in one sentence.

-She has religious pictures all over the walls; magnets all over the fridge; a screensaver on her computer that plays a slideshow of various images of Jesus.
-She has published spiritual poetry
-Constantly prays and listens to sermons every night
-Buys dishes with spiritual messages on it
-Buys me religious books. Got a bible for my birthday with my name engraved on it! (I'll put it next to the others from the last three years).

I don't have any problem with this. She has struggled through life and found a way to cope through it. It obviously works for her and I respect anyone who sticks to their beliefs. I am not an atheist but I'm not invested in any faith currently.

And that's because there are far too many people who use faith as an excuse to be the biggest fucking bigots on the planet. Over the last hour i've had to listen to her go on one of her weekly rants (usually while flipping through TV channels).

-Anything involving sex or sexual jokes is "garbage"
-Any movie or TV show with bad words that are not "damn" or "hell" is "garbage".
-It's October, so guess what? I get to hear her say "Halloween is garbage" every single day.
-Men who do not act or appear masculine are "gay" and it's "disgusting"
-Violent shows, games or movies are "garbage" (you do not want to know what she thought of Mad Max. I didn't even like the movie and I can't stand her opinion on it).

Again, I don't have any problem with those opinions on their own. Whatever. Everyone has things they don't like for whatever reason.

What I have a problem with is how much she claims to be so in tune with a religion that is based entirely around love, forgiveness and acceptance, and yet is the most judgemental person I've ever known.

We had an exterminator come by a few months ago to take care of insects. He came and left and she was all friendly with him until she started seeing bugs again. So she spends the next several weeks referring to him as the "stupid man" and going on and on about how he scammed her and is a shit person for coming in the house with his stink shoes and stealing her money. She constantly harasses this guy to come back and exterminate the place again for free.

So he does. And the bugs keep showing up.

Guess where the fucking bugs where coming from? Some new piece of furniture she bought. Soon as she got rid of it they were gone.

This is a regular occurrence. She judges everyone as soon as she sees them, calls them stupid behind their backs and thinks everyone owes her respect. I don't need to be religious to know that Jesus was not that kind of person.

A while ago I asked her if she knew anything about Dream Catchers. She used to be into crafts and I figured it might be a way to strike up a conversation. She then goes on a rant about how it's witchcraft and I should stay away from that kind of stuff. lol it's fucking native american and has nothing to do with witchcraft.

When I told her I wasn't religious a few years ago, we got into an argument and I was kicked out of the house for 3 days because she refused to believe it. If only she knew that she was the reason.

Apologies for the blog post but I just needed to vent. Anyone have similar experiences?

 

[Shaanyboi]

Your mom sucks. Sorry OP.

 

[Twilight Gap]

Your mom sucks. Sorry OP.

Yes she does, but I can't move out yet so I have to deal with it.

 

[Jaffaboy]

Tell her all this to her face, confronting her actions is the only way she can change her ways. Probably best to not go at her aggressively though, just sit her down and tell her the issues you have with her.

 

[Snorlocs]

My grandma is like that. She is 95 years old though and lived in a pretty horrible time period for black women in a british colony. Still fucking sucks though. It's impossible to deal with. Just bear it as much as you can until you can leave

 

[Twilight Gap]

Tell her all this to her face, confronting her actions is the only way she can change her ways. Probably best to not go at her aggressively though, just sit her down and tell her the issues you have with her.

I don't expect her to change; people rarely do, especially when they're as set in their ways as she is.

Writing it down is the only way I don't snap and say it though.

 

[dabig2]

Considering God is the biggest hypocrite in the universe, she's just following the flow.

 

[Twilight Gap]

My grandma is like that. She is 95 years old though and lived in a pretty horrible time period for black women in a british colony. Still fucking sucks though. It's impossible to deal with. Just bear it as much as you can until you can leave

i understand being apathetic to the world after going through many hardships and giving no fucks about anything. I do not however understand the point of choosing to believe in a faith that is centered around healing and moving past that, and then doing the exact opposite.

 

[AUS Karol]

Yeah as someone who is Catholic I can definitely understand.

Just because your identified yourself with a 'good'organization does not make you a good person.

It's about actually practising the beliefs, calling someone stupid is as a malicious insult is not Christian. I am sure there are oher people who are good because of christianity because of what it teaches OP.

 

[Disgraced]

I have similar problems with family, OP, in my case not really overtly religious so much as it is prudish, regressive, and dysfunctional.

Not much you can do other than continue working towards getting out. I wish you the best of luck.

 

[Cartman86]

Considering God is the biggest hypocrite in the universe, she's just following the flow.

All I can think of when I hear this.

 

[MikeDown]

Christianity is more of a culture then a religion, and most honest believers I think will admit to being hypocritical.

 

[Fj0823]

Yeah as someone who is Catholic I can definitely understand.

Just because your identified yourself with a 'good'organization does not make you a good person.

It's about actually practising the beliefs, calling someone stupid is as a malicious insult is not Christian. I am sure there are oher people who are good because of christianity because of what it teaches OP.

Ditto

 

[guek]

Considering God is the biggest hypocrite in the universe, she's just following the flow.

So edgy I nearly cut myself.

Also, first thing I thought of when I saw the title was the Republican party

 

[AUS Karol]

Christianity is more of a culture then a religion, and most honest believers I think will admit to being hypocritical.

Yeah sometimes I do or say things that are hypocrtital but I like to think I am improving slowly.

But I think that any belief/organization has hypocrites.

 

[Tagyhag]

A lot of people pick and choose what they want out of religion. I bet there's a good amount of Christians who never even read the entire Bible.

Hell, if you wear clothing made out of more than one animal, then you'd be a hypocrite.

 

[akira28]

everyone is at a different point in their journey, even if their path is a Christian one. But everyone, especially those who have a really significant passion, need to learn to be a little more empathic and try not to hurt but help. And "help" as defined by others, not by you.

 

[The Artisan]

Guess where the fucking bugs where coming from? Some new piece of furniture she bought. Soon as she got rid of it they were gone.

I just wanted to say I think this particular part was funny.

 

[KevinCow]

"I'm a good Christian person, I go to church every Sunday, but I don't want any of my tax dollars going to help the poor and needy!"

 

[Twilight Gap]

I just wanted to say I think this particular part was funny.

it would have been hilarious if she would ever admit to being wrong but she still goes on about the guy like he killed her dog or something.

Just want to say, you will likely meet much more horrible people in your life who have authority over you. Your mother isn't terrible, she really isn't.

part of the reason i'm still here is because i refuse to put myself in that situation. i'm not going to take that kind of shit from anybody.

 

[AntoneM]

I read the whole post, just snipping it so as to not create a wall of text.

Just want to say, you will likely meet much more horrible people in your life who have authority over you. Your mother isn't terrible, she really isn't.

 

[Azulsky]

Have x beliefs on the afterlife/origins of humanity doesn't make a person less judgmental.

 

[akira28]

A lot of people pick and choose what they want out of religion. I bet there's a good amount of Christians who never even read the entire Bible.

Hell, if you wear clothing made out of more than one animal, then you'd be a hypocrite.

A lot of people look at the byblos as an instruction manual, and others as the foundation for a godly way of living. One way is clear but inflexible and not prone to change or acceptance of realities, the other is a reconciliation of life on Earth and what the interpretation of God's plan might be, and how to life between.

you might call it picking and choosing, other people call it an evolution of faith, which the Catholic church has been a part of, even though it took a lot of disaster and loss for them to finally 'admit defeat'. Or acknowledge realities and stop trying to force them, I'm not sure which. Both are kind of tentative, but the stone is definitely no longer affixed.

 

[Walpurgis]

Your mom sounds difficult but she is your mom. I strongly recommend that you tell her about the hypocrisy that you are seeing but do it from a Christian angle. It might soften her and make her more open to what you have to say. You can even feign interest in Christianity if that is what is needed to get her to listen.

Either way, you should take care of her when she is old, just like she took care of you when you were young. Try not to hate her.

 

[Twilight Gap]

Have x beliefs on the afterlife/origins of humanity doesn't make a person less judgmental.

thought the whole point of 'practice what you preach' was to live by those beliefs. otherwise they're pointless "good feeling" words.

 

[The Artisan]

it would have been hilarious if she would ever admit to being wrong but she still goes on about the guy like he killed her dog or something.

seriously? couldn't you just be like, 'ma...we found where the fuckin bugs are coming from, they were coming from your nasty ass couch, and now that it's gone. they're gone. how is it the man's fault?'

 

[IdreamofHIME]

Jesus forgives her.

 

[dabig2]

So edgy I nearly cut myself.

Also, first thing I thought of when I saw the title was the Republican party

Literally no other way to phrase honestly. The entire foundation has a corrupted source. Is it a surprise that most that adhere to it strongly employ it in their own lives?

 

[Mental Atrophy]

Few things are as amusing to me as somebody who starts a BBS thread to complain about mommy.

 

[AUS Karol]

"I'm a good Christian person, I go to church every Sunday, but I don't want any of my tax dollars going to help the poor and needy!"

Helping the poor is an act of charity.

I know people like this but please don't generalize everyone.

 

[Weiss]

Your mother is a piece of shit. Deal with her as little as possible and once you take off just try to pretend she was a bad trip.

 

[CarpeDeezNutz]

You can see their judgment of others coming out their eyes. I have a Christian friend who calls that shit out about other Christians tho, I read his posts and it makes me think this is what Jesus was about.

 

[egruntz]

Ah, yes, this is my life's frustration. Too many churches and individuals who claim they're Christians but then live their lives in ways that are contrary to many teachings of Christ. That is the meaning of using the Lord's name in vain—not saying "Oh my God," like some people think.

What's even more frustrating, I feel, is the immediate need to associate Christianity with the Republican party (I'm only taking U.S. here, folks). I have no idea why the two just have to go hand-in-hand. Meh.

Hell, if you wear clothing made out of more than one animal, then you'd be a hypocrite.

Christianity =/= Judaism. Christ came to fulfill the law (the old testament). The law was impossible to uphold back then and is impossible to uphold now. Only a perfect being (Christ) could uphold the law perfectly. That is the reason only Christ could be the sacrifice for people's sins. That's the entire point of the coming of the messiah.

 

[Northeastmonk]

Family is family though. Even though they hate media or something it doesn't mean give up on them.

My sister came out of left field with how she hates video games. She has been kept to herself her entire life, never drank, had guys over, etc etc. she was there when I was bought games and consoles. Now with her new husband and they hate video games and use it. Even though they could easily be considered nerdy themselves and a bit kept to themselves as adults.

It's weird. I taught my nephews how to play Mega Man and it's like I taught the kid how to smoke a blunt.

Family is still family and it's wise not to get rid of them no matter how much you hate their attitudes. One day that's all you'll have in life.

I grew up this way. My folks got a divorce and I went and had sex, did drugs, hung out with whoever and whenever. It bit me in the butt, but I moved past it and just did better in life. I had fun and got shunned for it too as a teen.

 

[FLAguy954]

Considering God is the biggest hypocrite in the universe, she's just following the flow.

This is all that needs to be said. My parents are the same OP (and I can't move out yet either) so you are not alone.

 

[Twilight Gap]

Why?

can't get license until the spring.

This is all that needs to be said. My parents are the same OP (and I can't move out yet either) so you are not alone.

she doesn't harp on me about it like she used to and it's not like i'm doing "unholy stuff" under her roof. but interacting with her is like talking to a wall.

Family is family though. Even though they hate media or something it doesn't mean give up on them.

My sister came out of left field with how she hates video games. She has been kept to herself her entire life, never drank, had guys over, etc etc. she was there when I was bought games and consoles. Now with her new husband and they hate video games and use it. Even though they could easily be considered nerdy themselves and a bit kept to themselves as adults.

It's weird. I taught my nephews how to play Mega Man and it's like I taught the kid how to smoke a blunt.

Family is still family and it's wise not to get rid of them no matter how much you hate their attitudes. One day that's all you'll have in life.

I grew up this way. My folks got a divorce and I went and had sex, did drugs, hung out with whoever and whenever. It bit me in the butt, but I moved past it and just did better in life. I had fun and got shunned for it too as a teen.

i mean i've made some dumb choices and i'm grateful that i do have that opportunity when there are others who do not. that doesn't mean i should sit pretty and listen to this toxicity every day because it is contagious.

 

[AudioNoir]

Most everyone I know is Christian (specifically Catholic) and practice "selective sinning", where they call out people on certain "faults" but exhibit faults of their own. Call them on theirs, and you get "well I'm not perfect, and God knows that."

Hurts my head every time, but I feel like this isn't uncommon.

 

[Northeastmonk]

Christianity has always felt that way because they believe in correcting every little thing someone does and they always think their way is the best way.

It doesn't have to make sense because you can just throw it back onto religion. I had an ex best friend in high school go on to be a pastor and it was like I should have never met the guy. I've met people who were Catholic and it was like their religion fell in their lives at the right place and the right time. It's always convenient for the religious people. It's like the ultimate excuse to pass judgment on something or someone.

The two more important people in my family (my dad is dead) are big with religion. It's growing in God or not growing up at all. Don't associate with others because God is all you need. Sure, one is worse than the other. My mother is religious, but she drinks and likes to do things that aren't necessarily by the book. My sister though is going through the Baptist school system with her kids. I bring up "playing with other kids" and they act like I'm talking about some weird make believe idea.

It sucks because I know both sides. I know how to be mad and how to move on. It won't make me not get mad because it's like I gotta fight a mountain for something some people don't have a problem with.

This may be a ridiculous rant myself, but even I get my past thrown back at me. I swear Christians love throwing the past at you like you were Satan. Drugs aren't in my life anymore or have been in over a decade. I was never a huge addict. I just had fun. I get that thrown back in my face by a guy I had glare at me when I first met him. This was while I was playing Halo 2 online years ago. I had underage sex brought up because I went thru an abortion with a girl I dated when I was teen too. That was weird. They tried saying I had problems in life because I had sex at an early age. Like I still lusted for young girls. It was weird and it made me upset. It sounds like a fundamental Baptist hell hole to be quite honest.

It's made me mad at religion and I sorta never went back to church because of it. I hate the political views and the personal views. Don't get me wrong. I like to help others and be there for people, but when it comes down to personal beliefs, we disagree a lot.

 

[Twilight Gap]

Christianity has always felt that way because they believe in correcting every little thing someone does and they always think their way is the best way.

It doesn't have to make sense because you can just throw it back onto religion. I had an ex best friend in high school go on to be a pastor and it was like I should have never met the guy. I've met people who were Catholic and it was like their religion fell in their lives at the right place and the right time. It's always convenient for the religious people. It's like the ultimate excuse to pass judgment on something or someone.

The two more important people in my family (my dad is dead) are big with religion. It's growing in God or not growing up at all. Don't associate with others because God is all you need. Sure, one is worse than the other. My mother is religious, but she drinks and likes to do things that aren't necessarily by the book. My sister though is going through the Baptist school system with her kids. I bring up "playing with other kids" and they act like I'm talking about some weird make believe idea.

It sucks because I know both sides. I know how to be mad and how to move on. It won't make me not get mad because it's like I gotta fight a mountain for something some people don't have a problem with.

This may be a ridiculous rant myself, but even I get my past thrown back at me. I swear Christians love throwing the past at you like you were Satan. Drugs aren't in my life anymore or have been in over a decade. I was never a huge addict. I just had fun. I get that thrown back in my face by a guy I had glare at me when I first met him. This was while I was playing Halo 2 online years ago. I had underage sex brought up because I went thru an abortion with a girl I dated when I was teen too. That was weird. They tried saying I had problems in life because I had sex at an early age. Like I still lusted for young girls. It was weird and it made me upset. It sounds like a fundamental Baptist hell hole to be quite honest.

It's made me mad at religion and I sorta never went back to church because of it. I hate the political views and the personal views. Don't get me wrong. I like to help others and be there for people, but when it comes down to personal beliefs, we disagree a lot.

appreciate the post and it reflects some of my experiences as well. fortunately my fam is largely more on the forgiving side then the past digging side, but i still have to tread lightly when it comes to being "accepted" for not following that belief.

i don't have any issue with the religion. i have my opinions on some things in it but i think the overall messages that i've mentioned already are powerful and something everyone should live by in some fashion.

but the people who claim to associate with it and behave contrarily are impossible to deal with it and not only turn people away from it, but also misrepresent it.

 

[Piano]

It doesn't sound like it's an issue with Christianity. It sounds like your mother has anxiety issues.

 

[Soriku]

 

[Shining Sunshine]

I think that represent a large part of Christians.

They think they are pious, but if they think that, they're giving into Pride.

Buying all of these symbols and spouting religious rabble isn't living piously. You just live it and forget about preaching it (unless you're a preacher).

 

[MrOogieBoogie]

I have this problem with my girlfriend, but she's on the other spectrum.

She believes that people should have the freedom to believe in any religion or faith or God that they want. While she is personally staunchly against abortion, she believes it is ultimately a woman's right to choose for herself. She is completely for gay marriage and has many gay friends. She doesn't think sex before marriage is sinful, nor is it a sin to divorce or use contraceptives or anything like that.

And yet she identifies as Roman Catholic because she enjoys mass and the community, which drives me absolutely crazy. You can't just go against a religion like that and still adhere to it.

 

[Seesaw15]

What do you think religious people are supposed to be like OP? You're mom sounds like she has her issues but you really need to get off your high horse OP.

 

[Soriku]

What do you think religious people are supposed to be like OP? You're mom sounds like she has her issues but you really need to get off your high horse OP.

Pointing out his mom's erratic behavior doesn't mean the OP is on a high horse.

 

[Twilight Gap]

Driver's license? How old are you, and is the issue that you can't get to work otherwise? there isn't any public transit you can use?

Am 22. No transportation around here.

Also, just snapped and her and it looks like i'm being kicked out again smh.

 

[jb1234]

It doesn't sound like it's an issue with Christianity. It sounds like your mother has anxiety issues.

Yeah. I've also seen a lot of overcompensation when people with hard lives become religious, like they're holding on to it as tightly as they can and projecting outward onto others.

 

[RatskyWatsky]

Most of the behaviors and opinions in the op don't even contradict each other though.

 

[Starphoenix]

Sorry for the situation OP. Sadly, I have family like that as well, and even being a Christian it can be hard to deal with.

I think that represent a large part of Christians.

They think they are pious, but if they think that, they're giving into Pride.

Buying all of these symbols and spouting religious rabble isn't living piously. You just live it and forget about preaching it (unless you're a preacher).

Jesus already said not everyone who claims to know Him will enter the Kingdom of God, so I think the idea that there are many people claiming Christianity that don't really reflect Christ isn't a new concept. That's why Jesus' parable of the Pharisee and Tax Collector was so profound because He illustrated the heart Christian's should have: "God, be merciful to me, a sinner."

Just because hypocrites exist in a community does not invalidate the sincere faith and gentleness of others.

 

[Wyndstryker]

In vast majority of cases it's not the religion, it's the person. Vast majority have no clue what their religion even teaches, so how the hell can they practice it properly.