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[FoneBone]

OK, I know I'm rambling here, and I'm probably going to end up being insulted by somebody, but so be it.

I'm not labeling this as a Gayming-Age thread, because this is pretty clearly a universal issue. Anyway, there's this guy I've met here who I think is cute, funny, etc. We've already had some conversations about relationships and what we're looking for, and I think that generally speaking, we're both looking for the same thing in a relationship. Last night, we sort of danced with each other. Afterwards, we had a pretty long conversation over IM, but I think we kind of tiptoed aroung the proverbial "elephant in the room" -- basically, I like him, I'm attracted to him, I'd like to date him. And now I'm debating whether I should finally be blunt about it. I'm afraid I'm going to regret it.

 

[teiresias]

Getting if out of the way now, no matter how it ends up, is better in the long run. Trust me, look up my "Life Sucks and I'm going to be alone forever" (or something like that thread title). Alot of my trouble in that thread (that I'm still dealing with at the moment) would have been avoided if I'd asked the guy out on a real date months ago. Even if he'd said no I'd have been able to either A) pull away and stop seeing him at all to save myself the hurt, or B) prep myself to make sure I could handle just being friends rather than falling in love with him.

Found it, here's my old topic.

 

[StoOgE]

Being friends with someone you want more with is allways a bad idea. Go for it, even if he doesnt go for it, you would likely be miserable being around him but not being with him.

 

[Alucard]

Go for it. You're early enough in your friendship that something like that wouldn't have a detrimental effect on your relationship. He may even be thinking the same thing for all you know.

Why do I feel weird replying to this? Heh.

 

[Suerte]

Go for it, skirting around the issue sucks, I've been there before. Easier said than done I guess but just pluck up the courage, it'll be worth it in the long run!

 

[Boogie]

I think I'm almost at the state where all I'm going to be able to do to pursue a woman is flat out say "I'm attracted to you, but I suck at the dating game, so if you can excuse my bluntness, would you like to go out sometime".

Anything more charming and smooth is quite beyond my capacity.

 

[Suerte]

I think I'm almost at the state where all I'm going to be able to do to pursue a woman is flat out say "I'm attracted to you, but I suck at the dating game, so if you can excuse my bluntness, would you like to go out sometime".

Anything more charming and smooth is quite beyond my capacity.

Ha, I think most women would think that was quite cute actually. Well, I would anyway + penis.

 

[Incognito]

you won't wear a pink shirt but you'll say "cute"?

 

[Boogie]

Ha, I think most women would think that was quite cute actually. Well, I would anyway + penis.

Suerte, you're starting to make me wish I were gay.......

DAMN MY LOVE OF THE FEMALE FORM!!!!!

 

[Blackie]

I think I'm almost at the state where all I'm going to be able to do to pursue a woman is flat out say "I'm attracted to you, but I suck at the dating game, so if you can excuse my bluntness, would you like to go out sometime".

Anything more charming and smooth is quite beyond my capacity.

That sounds a hell of a lot better than doing nothing at all. At least you'd finally be doing something to net a girl.

 

[Jim Bowie]

Wait a second. By "here", do you mean the forums? Cause I think that person knows by now.

 

[demon]

Suerte, you're starting to make me wish I were gay.......

DAMN MY LOVE OF THE FEMALE FORM!!!!!

Seriously dude, I don't care what people say.....it seems so much easier to find someone when you're gay. I've been hit on by way more guys than girls....that right there says it all. If I were gay, I could be having sweet buttlove right now. But I do not crave the man butt.

 

[Keio]

A good litmus test for "the dating game" is to think how you would feel/react if someone did something to you. Many people are afraid that they are some special case that gets laughed at if they did a thing they see other people doing. That's not true! (And even if you get laughed at, it's not the end of the world.)

I'd say there's no reason to "pad the question" with explanations that you are socially inept - just ask it.

Remember to smile, say a compliment, suggest doing something nice (having dinner at a proper restaurant) and then - for example while at the dinner - just ask "would you like to go steady" or whatever

 

[Escape Goat]

Life in all areas would be alot simpler if people communicated. From "he said/she said" hearsay BS and relationship problems, just being direct cuts through all the drama and crap that ambiguity would invite in.

 

[NetMapel]

I think I'm almost at the state where all I'm going to be able to do to pursue a woman is flat out say "I'm attracted to you, but I suck at the dating game, so if you can excuse my bluntness, would you like to go out sometime".

Anything more charming and smooth is quite beyond my capacity.

I know I would giggle for a bit if I heard that from a guy, and if I like him, sure, I'd go out with him.

 

[Aurum]

IBC&F

 

[FoneBone]

Wait a second. By "here", do you mean the forums? Cause I think that person knows by now.

No, here on campus. I'm not that stupid.

 

[Suerte]

you won't wear a pink shirt but you'll say "cute"?

Eh, you sir, are a fucktard. I've heard plenty of my straight male friends describe a girl as cute. What's wrong with you? EH?

 

[FoneBone]

OK, I told him. He said no. I still feel better just for asking.

 

[Boogie]

I know I would giggle for a bit if I heard that from a guy, and if I like him, sure, I'd go out with him.

The bolded section is where I believe I would run into problems

 

[teiresias]

I'm beginning to think any gay male that posts on this damn forum is cursed somehow.

 

[NetMapel]

The bolded section is where I believe I would run into problems

Well, if you're hot, then you're settled

 

[Boogie]

Well, if you're hot, then you're settled

Awww, dammit, you're gonna make me post my pic now, aren't you? ;P

 

[Suerte]

OK, I told him. He said no. I still feel better just for asking.

Ah that sucks, don't want to be nosy but did he explain why?

 

[Pimpwerx]

Man, it is definitely better to get it over with ASAP. I went out on a date for the first time in months this weekend. Spent the last couple days with this girl I met through a friend. She was really into me when I met her on Tuesday, but she seemed pretty cold on me when we hung out this weekend. I think it might have been b/c I was really coy at first. She ended up asking me out and giving me her number and stuff. I was so blazed last Tuesday I didn't really know what was going on, so I kinda ignored all the signs she was putting forward. I tried to make up for it by being more aggressive and decisive this weekend, but she just wasn't feeling it. We ended up leaving a concert early last night, but not for the good reasons, but b/c she "wasn't into it". Meh, that might be the end of that. I think if I was more direct and persuasive from the first day, I might have had a shot. Oh well, I can't live with the regret, so I think I might throw that matzah ball out there today and see what gives. I really don't want or need a gf right now, but between this chick actually being cool, and the potential for regular sex...I have to try. PEACE.

 

[JackFrost2012]

I've wasted too many months dancing around the issue before finally asking someone out, for better or for ill. I'm trying recently to take things a lot less seriously, and realize that asking someone out isn't the same as asking them to marry you, so if you're interested in someone just do it up front and see where it goes from there! Velocity!