The BDSM Thread
- Thread starter Captain_Spanky
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Indeed. All the best, Cad.
I read a really amazing comic about BDSM ,check it out http://shiniez.deviantart.com/art/page-zero-dun-dun-dunnnnn-underwhelming-huh-311369363
Messofanego
Banned
Yup, pretty great stuff.
Messofanego
Banned
Featheredkitten
Banned
Wondering how I didn't know about this thread. Catching up will be nice.
mmmmmm, best movie.
Yeah no lol
mmmmmm, best movie.
DoktorEvil
Banned
Where the safest place to meet a partner in the Kink community? I know the regular Tinder/OKC/Match hookup won't be the same.
Featheredkitten
Banned
They've mentioned fetlife.com in the thread a couple times, seems like a nice place to meet like minded folks in your area, at least. Haven't used it personally.
Yep, been following it for quite a while. Love it.
Yeah, register on Fetlife (be honest, it's much better for you that way, trust me) and find out where the nearest Munch is.
Always somewhere public. Never agree to meet someone at their place without meeting them in public first. Also, if you are heavily involved in your local scene, ask someone you trust about them. Make sure they are who they say they are and act the way they seem. If coffee or something seems too boring, you could always go to something in your local scene together. Things like seminars or rope bites are a lot of fun and let you get a kind of idea about how the person acts outside the vanilla world. Be sure to check Fetlife and see if you have any going on. Also, the person may be as scared as you are and just as nervous. It just helps to assume the best and prepare for the worst.
Edit: Oh, you meant meet as in to meet them. That's easy. Fetlife. They probably have a list of events in your area. Go to a munch. Attend a rope bite. Or a tng meeting. Fetlife is much more a social networking site than a dating site, I've found. Go be social!
GungHo
Single-handedly caused Exxon-Mobil to sue FOX, start World War 3
Yeah, I'm in the community but damned if it doesn't sound like some sort of life insurance policy for the autoerotic asphyxiators.
demosthenes
Member
Choose your restaurant more carefully and go when it's busy.
Also have one, but haven't had a chance to use it yet, and I'm not sure what the range of the remote is like...
Would be interesting to hear people's experiences, and how and where they use them
Definitely this. I started off going to munches and now organise some on there. Most of my closest friends I have found from munching so it's absolutely worth it.
I don't think that qualifies as BDSM. I used to go to this BDSM bar in Osaka, and the cool thing about it was it was really tame compared to what I imagined BDSM bars were like in America. Met a lot of girls dressed in school girl outfits into the submissive role. Fun times
I'd also like to parrot the consensus and say Fetlife. I've made some great friends there, as well as a lovely litle sub I'll be breaking in when I go to Japan this November.
I'm so happy some GAF members are on Fetlife. I searched for a NeoGAF group but didn't find one and assumed I was on my own
That shitshow has a very limited understanding about what BDSM actually is.
The important thing to remember about Fetlife is that it isn't a dating site it's a community site, one with a lot of pictures of very kinky hot people but still mostly community. You get out of it what you put in. Unfortunately If you are one of the unlucky ones to be male then you have to put a lot in and frankly the best you can do is use the site to find local munches and actually chat to folk.
Luckily this past year the almost militant feminist wave has died down and guys can try to enjoy the site too, there is still the occasional profile that starts off with 'if you are male then fuck off and die in a fire' or some such but it's no where near as hostile to men as it used to be.
Luckily this past year the almost militant feminist wave has died down and guys can try to enjoy the site too, there is still the occasional profile that starts off with 'if you are male then fuck off and die in a fire' or some such but it's no where near as hostile to men as it used to be.
Any FetlifeGAF members brave enough to share their username via PM? The gamers on Fetlife's gaming-oriented groups are pretty basic and uninformed, and don't follow much more than IGN. It'd be awesome to have GAF friends over there too.
I understand if everyone wants to remain anonymous though.
I remember enjoying that too. *checks Google images* Yep, still like it
I understand if everyone wants to remain anonymous though.
I remember enjoying that too. *checks Google images* Yep, still like it
I never said that was what feminism was, purely that it's the banner that a very vocal group used on Fetlife, mostly last year when the kinky and popular section was a vile wastland of hatred. And yes there were quite a few profiles from *self declared* feminists that begin with big red text telling men to go die in a variety of ways. It's why I only used the site for arranging munches and keeping up with people I have met in real life. But as I said things have been markedly better this year.
Featheredkitten
Banned
I'd honestly love to use the site, but my guy is....very much so not into the scene and quite monogamous...I did recommend it to my best friend though and he was quite appreciative.
DoktorEvil
Banned
Always somewhere public. Never agree to meet someone at their place without meeting them in public first. Also, if you are heavily involved in your local scene, ask someone you trust about them. Make sure they are who they say they are and act the way they seem. If coffee or something seems too boring, you could always go to something in your local scene together. Things like seminars or rope bites are a lot of fun and let you get a kind of idea about how the person acts outside the vanilla world. Be sure to check Fetlife and see if you have any going on. Also, the person may be as scared as you are and just as nervous. It just helps to assume the best and prepare for the worst.
Edit: Oh, you meant meet as in to meet them. That's easy. Fetlife. They probably have a list of events in your area. Go to a munch. Attend a rope bite. Or a tng meeting. Fetlife is much more a social networking site than a dating site, I've found. Go be social!
I'd also like to parrot the consensus and say Fetlife. I've made some great friends there, as well as a lovely litle sub I'll be breaking in when I go to Japan this November.
I'm so happy some GAF members are on Fetlife. I searched for a NeoGAF group but didn't find one and assumed I was on my own
This isn't the first time I heard of Fetlife. I'm just so apprehensive to share my personal info on there.
Darksol, what groups are misinformed on games on there? That might be the best place for me to start meeting peoples.
You don't need to share any information, you can have a completely blank profile other then a username and you can even change that every month if you wish or even close and lock out the account all together. You don't have to pay, doing so simply let's you use the video section which is fairly pointless for the type of site anyway.
You can browse and get use to the site without sharing a single thing but ultimately you will get little out of it. It is a intimacy based community and without opening up about yourself a little (which when you find the right people to do so with is very relieving) you won't get far.
As a final note I will say this, two years ago I was very depressed, depressed to the point of thinking about stupid things, not being able to be fully intimate or truly open up to people was proving to be a massive burden. Last year I went to my first munch and the sense of relief was almost euphoric, I made friends who I hold very dear and found people I can be entirely open with, on top of that had a lot of fun and some great laughs. Hell I have just got back from holiday with a friend who I can't imagine being without who
I met from there.
CornBurrito
Member
What is a munch...?
I've even noticing that a lot of people talk about being a dom, but they're mostly being tops, not doms. It's a common mistake though.
Fetlife is in fact a pretty incredible site. As other said, it's a community site and not so much a dating site, though if things go well, you can indeed find someone to date with. There used to be another well known, though infamous site: Collarme. Though, that was mostly for hookups, and the majority if the members there were pretty terrible. Fetlife has basically done for the kink community what Facebook has the vanilla population.
Oh and if anyone wants to add me, my username is Nephtis
Fetlife is in fact a pretty incredible site. As other said, it's a community site and not so much a dating site, though if things go well, you can indeed find someone to date with. There used to be another well known, though infamous site: Collarme. Though, that was mostly for hookups, and the majority if the members there were pretty terrible. Fetlife has basically done for the kink community what Facebook has the vanilla population.
Oh and if anyone wants to add me, my username is Nephtis
Groups like "Kinky and Geeky" and "Video Games". They're pretty much like most non-GAFers: mostly just concerned with AAA franchises, and have no more insight than the average IGN audience. But they're enthusiastic, so it can still be fun to see what's got them interested. I used the gaming groups as a stepping stone into Fetlife as well ^-^
^ This. Also, non-fetlife members can't see any profile page. You need an account. Also you can set photos to Fetlife Members, or Friends Only.
A gathering of like minded individuals. Usually in a public, safe environment. Chat, meet fellow members, set plans, etc.
The ones designed for wearing in public tend to be quiet enough that no one will hear. She had it inside her btw.
Thing is, if you know someone who spots your account on FetLife... they're on FetLife too. That's been my reasoning behind using it openly. Besides, embracing a less-than-vanilla lifestyle may feel shameful at first, but when you realize no one really gives a shit about it, that feeling will go away. It's something just about everyone who has experimented or embraced this side of themselves experiences, believe me.
CornBurrito
Member
I'm going to guess yes, but does Fetlife have an active gay userbase on it?
DoktorEvil
Banned
Ok I took the plunge.
GAF name is same as Fetlife name.
Oh fuck this'll be a wild ride.
GAF name is same as Fetlife name.
Oh fuck this'll be a wild ride.
They have an active anything user base lol. It's really quite good and I encourage you so give the site a try. It's not all sex and debauchery 24/7, it's a community site that just enjoys having like-minded people. There are groups for just about anything you can think of.
It has an active every userbase, you just have to find the right groups for your interests.
It will be as wild as you want it to be. I've proposed making a GAF group in Fetlife but we want to find at least 5 members before we put real consideration into it.
DoktorEvil
Banned
Sure I'm game. Gotta show these gamers what's what.
Very active.
Woot!
Our legion grows. Oh boy!
My username for any other Gaffers is:
submit-to-lashes
I think we're at 4 already ^_^
Make the group, make the group, make the group
What she said. We're all too lazy. Save us, Nephtis, you're our only hope
tearsofash
Member
My fet username is 93under93.
Edit: I got un-lazy and made a group. Huzzah!
Edit: I got un-lazy and made a group. Huzzah!
DoktorEvil
Banned
Is it particularly difficult to find a sub? What about female doms?
We're here if you need us
EVERYTHING
except scat
im already bisexual and nongendered so i like pretty much everyone
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