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[Chinner]

Tonight (29th March) on Channel 4 at 8PM is "Ask the Chancellors", live debate between Alistair Darling, George Osborne and Vincent Cable, watch it and also be here to discuss!
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With the ever increasing debates on UK politics on GAF I figured we should have our own thread so we could be collectively bitter and also have a place where we can talk about Greggs. I mean shit, if there’s a thread about closing your eyes and then drawing a cat why can’t we have one?

So I present to you:

UKGAF thread of Politics, Britishness and the Daily Hail.

I’ll be blunt people, this is the first time I’ve actually bothered putting effort into an OP, and chances are it’ll be rewritten at some point, so I’m actually not going to bother making a 20 page OP detailing what bike David Cameron rides or the exact policies of each political party. I’m assuming you guys know this stuff.

Still, for those who don’t know what the shit is happening I’ll give you a quick (and possibly biased) run down of the political parties and news sources.

Political Parties:

New Labour: Currently in power, with Gordon Brown as the acting leader and Prime Minister. Claims to be centre-left but actually isn’t. After being slapped about by the Tories in the 80s and 90s, Labour reinvented itself as New Labour with bullshit lines such as “Tough on crime and tough on causes of crime” and “Education education education” aimed at pleasing both sides of the political spectrum. Is known for creating the NHS, minimum wage act, reducing our right to protest and involving us in a war no one wanted to be part off.

Conservative (also known as the Tories): Main opposing party to Labour and is currently led by David Cameron. Currently leading in the polls. Right wing, so expect the usual shit: Free market, trickle down economics, flat taxes and general conservative view point to social policies. There’s a lot of scepticism (well, more than usual) due to the Tories basically saying anything to please the proles, and their only line for ‘fixing’ the economy is “trust us”. Recently joined a new EU group full of homophobes and the sort. Is known for Winston Churchill, and Margaret Thatcher fucking up the unions in the 80s, privatising and selling off trades and the FREE MARKET.

Liberal Democrats: Currently led by Nick Clegg, but Vince Cable is generally viewed as one of the most respectable people from the group. Was created from a merger back in the late 80s between the Liberal Party and Social Democratic group. The main ‘alternative’ choice. Is known for being liberal when it comes to social policies, but still quite right when it comes to economic (see: The Orange book). Is known for being against Trident and watching to restore our liberties, opposing the Iraq War, predicting the recession and Charles Kennedy being a lovable drunk.

Note: I say that Lib Dems are the main alternative vote (some say Green), but majority of people either vote Labour or Tory, resulting in UK politics being likened to a game of table tennis.

Minor Parties:
Scottish National Party (SNP): Centre-left. Does everything to do with Scotland, devolution and independence.
Green Party: The alternative alternative party. Left wing, loves renewable energies and anti-science or something.
United Kingdom Independence Party (UKIP): Hates the EU cause its so super gosh darn bad! and I mean it!!! Led by Nigel Farage, but he's going to resign in an attempt to become a MP and knock out John Bercow (Speaker of the House of Commons).
Pirate Party: Stuff to do with copyright, privacy and freedom of speech.

The loons:
British National Party: Led by Nick Griffin. In 2009 they managed to get 2 MEPS elected. Basically a bunch of fascist racists.
English Defence League (EDL): Group led by football firms cause they hate muslims. But they have black member so it's cool.
The Christian Party: Crazy right wing Christians who believe in privatising the NHS.

Sources of News:
BBC: Funded by the tv license (UK population). Has a charter to provide a variety of programming to all audiences. Bit shit at criticism with the current government but otherwise owns.
The Sun (tabloid): Owned by Murdoch. Right Wing and populist in views. Swap sides last year and now supports the tories. ALWAYS supports the troops.
Daily Mirror (tabloid): Always supports Labour.
Daily Star(tabloid): isn't a newspaper.
The Times: Owned by Murdoch, right wing broadsheet.
The Guardian: Left wing paper. Bit long winded like all heavy hitters, but the best newspaper.
The DailyTele(tory)graph: Right wing broadsheet, probably the best place to go if you want to read right wing news.
The Independent: Left wing but claims to be independent. Good little newspaper. Has been bought for £1 by an ex-KGB millionaire; still in circulation but fate unknown.
Daily Mail: Known for causing moral panics. Read by middle age housewives. Wildly entertaining, but worrying influential.
The Financial Times: Don't care.

UK Blogs:
Liberal Conspiracy
Guy Fawkes's blog


In memory of SmokeyDave

 

[avaya]

Creating the NHS (Aneurin Bevan)

 

[Chinner]

Ta. You're totally right. Clement Attlee still owns though.

 

[silverbullet1080]

 

[Chinner]

now to sit back and watch this thread crash and burn.

 

[Empty]

this is a good site if you want to see how close the election is

http://www.ukpollingreport.co.uk/blog/

this what they currently predict based off the average of the most recent polls translated into a uniform swing.

c: 307 l: 264 ld: 49 other: 31, which means a hung parliament with the tories 19 seats short of a majority.

 

[ghst]

should probably put a line in the lib dem section about vince cable, being just about the only front bench politician still held in any sort of reverence (and nick clegg is about as compelling as a stevenage car park).

 

[navanman]

Whats the big deal with a hung parliament?
Nearly every other country in Europe has coalition goverments so I can't see the issue with it.

 

[Walshicus]

Fuck Britain, I'm English.

I'm sure that'd make a good bumper sticker, if I were a chav.

 

[Stinkles]

Fuck Britain, I'm English.

I'm sure that'd make a good bumper sticker, if I were a chav.

I would certainly key your car and knock the burberry off your scone.

 

[Chinner]

Whats the big deal with a hung parliament?
Nearly every other country in Europe has coalition goverments so I can't see the issue with it.

not sure actually, but what will basically happen is that if there is a hung parliament they'll just recall the election again until the leading group has the majority. the lib dems are kind of hoping for an hung parliament cause then they'll become pretty valuable.

 

[Subliminal]

Whats the big deal with a hung parliament?
Nearly every other country in Europe has coalition goverments so I can't see the issue with it.

It not as much a big deal as its just something that hasn't happened in a while.

And with a Hung parliament the Lib Dems will get alot more power.

 

[Chinner]

Fuck Britain, I'm English.

I'm sure that'd make a good bumper sticker, if I were a chav.

racist

 

[Walshicus]

I would certainly key your car and knock the burberry off your scone.

Hey hey I love Scotland; but I love it enough to set it free.

And joke's on you - I don't have a car! In fact I don't know whose car that was that you would have keyed... or whether the tenses in that last sentence work.

 

[i hate bees]

I was quite hyped by the Conservatives originally, I was caught up in their propaganda, change at least! hooray! I wonder what it will be!

So I waited, and I listened, and quickly my hope became diminished, Cameron reminds me of that quote from Batman, that he's like a dog chasing cars and that he wouldn't know what to do with one if he caught it.

I wouldn't be surprised if people voted Labour not to keep them in but to keep Cameron and the shadow cabinet out of any real responsibility.

 

[MrPing1000]

If it's as close as they're thinking it might be, the influence of the Scottish, Welsh and Northern Ireland parties may end up being hugely important in the aftermath.

If I could I'd vote Lib Dem, but Norn Iron is tribalist bullshit so allaince party and greens, might as well throw my vote away.

 

[ghst]

Whats the big deal with a hung parliament?
Nearly every other country in Europe has coalition goverments so I can't see the issue with it.

basically this:

 

[navanman]

If it's as close as they're thinking it might be, the influence of the Scottish, Welsh and Northern Ireland parties may end up being hugely important in the aftermath.

If I could I'd vote Lib Dem, but Norn Iron is tribalist bullshit so allaince party and greens, might as well throw my vote away.

Now thats would be classic.
The fate of the UK parliament depending on the DUP or Sinn Fein :lol

 

[Subliminal]

If it's as close as they're thinking it might be, the influence of the Scottish, Welsh and Northern Ireland parties may end up being hugely important in the aftermath.

If I could I'd vote Lib Dem, but Norn Iron is tribalist bullshit so allaince party and greens, might as well throw my vote away.

That's the idea of a Hung Parliament, Cause there's no majority the big parties need to form coalitions with small parties to make a majority and be able to form a government.


Its all explained here

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8427233.stm

 

[Chinner]

I was quite hyped by the Conservatives originally, I was caught up in their propaganda, change at least! hooray! I wonder what it will be!

this?

 

[Barberetti]

Ah nice, somewhere to have a good bitch and moan as the general election draws near.

 

[Subliminal]

this?

http://mydavidcameron.com/

 

[defel]

A nice, objective OP there I dont blame your cynicism though.

 

[SecretBonusPoint]

Yup, there we go, Cameron's reptilian visage now in this thread. We are doomed.

 

[Harry_Tequila]

Can anyone explain to me why there isn't going to be a by-election in Middlesbrough South and East Cleveland? Surely we can't just not bother when there are still a couple of months left until the election?

I mean, I've never actually contacted my MP or cared in any way what he was doig but I feel like I should be outraged that I currently have no representation in the Commons. That and it would be very amusing if the party leaders had to travel up to the frozen North to campaign for a by-election just a couple of weeks before the general.

 

[Falch]

Now thats would be classic.
The fate of the UK parliament depending on the DUP or Sinn Fein :lol

Don't see that happening, from the bbc article:

Also, in the current parliament, there are five Sinn Fein MPs who refuse to take the oath of allegiance to the Queen and as a result are not entitled to vote.

:lol

 

[Subliminal]

Can anyone explain to me why there isn't going to be a by-election in Middlesbrough South and East Cleveland? Surely we can't just not bother when there are still a couple of months left until the election?

I mean, I've never actually contacted my MP or cared in any way what he was doig but I feel like I should be outraged that I currently have no representation in the Commons. That and it would be very amusing if the party leaders had to travel up to the frozen North to campaign for a by-election just a couple of weeks before the general.

Because, in theory, an election could be called tomorrow and its not worth it electing a new MP and spending taxpayer money to get a MP in for what could potentially be only a few months/weeks

 

[painey]

a hung parliment is gunna kill the £.. anything but that.. hell even a tory *spit* outright win than a hung parliment..

I find it amusing that my current MP is a Tory who voted strongly for the war.. strongly for an investigation for the war.. strongly against gay rights.. and strongly against a hunting ban. What a classy gal.

 

[slider]

I come from a Labour supporting family. Weird cos looking back we were probably the only ones who were in the immediate area.

I'm worried Cameron won't be up to the job or have enough substance. But the cynic in me absolutely despises how beholden Labour is/can be to Trade Unions.

 

[I NEED SCISSORS]

All the parties are horrible. Not a single likeable candidate. David Cameron is pompous, Nick Clegg is his genetically identical clone, and Gordon Brown has a face like a smacked arse. But, I will pick one just so that the BNP do not get in.

Also, I wish the SNP would change their name. Decent party, but there are bound to be some misconceptions based on the name similarities to the BNP.

 

[Walshicus]

a hung parliment is gunna kill the £.. anything but that.. hell even a tory *spit* outright win than a hung parliment..

Currency strength isn't that big a deal overall.

 

[Subliminal]

All the parties are horrible. Not a single likeable candidate. David Cameron is pompous, Nick Clegg is his genetically identical clone, and Gordon Brown has a face like a smacked bottom. But, I will pick one just so that the BNP do not get in.

They kind of look similar, but otherwise I don't see your point

 

[painey]

Currency strength isn't that big a deal overall.

it is when you need to buy/sell it.

 

[Harry_Tequila]

Because, in theory, an election could be called tomorrow and its not worth it electing a new MP and spending taxpayer money to get a MP in for what could potentially be only a few months/weeks

In theory it could be June until an election is called. Surely it can't be allowed to just leave us with no member of parliament for months on end...

I'm going to complain! Just wait until my MP hears about this... oh...

 

[Subliminal]

Currency strength isn't that big a deal overall.

yes. yes it is. Remember last year when there was £/Euro parity for like a day and a shit ton of european/irish crossed the border and gutted all the shops?

In theory it could be June until an election is called. Surely it can't be allowed to just leave us with no member of parliament for months on end...

I'm going to complain! Just wait until my MP hears about this... oh...

Only 3 months!!

 

[Funky Papa]

yes. yes it is. Remember last year when there was £/Euro parity for like a day and a shit ton of european/irish crossed the border and gutted all the shops?

Well, that's not too bad for you guys, is it?

 

[Subliminal]

Well, that's not too bad for you guys, is it?

Its terrible for shopowners. Stock will lose value overnight.

 

[Lo-Volt]

Whats the big deal with a hung parliament?
Nearly every other country in Europe has coalition goverments so I can't see the issue with it.

I'm a little out of my league answering this, because I'm not European, but...

I guess it's a mental expectation. Few British governments in recent history had small majorities or pluralities and went the distance in the first place. In addition, the Liberals did not have as much influence or MPs as they seem to have now, so British voters saw no more than two parties (Labour and Conservative) taking the reins of power from each other. And since Labour effectively replaced the old Liberal party as the voice of the left, I don't think British voters are really used to seeing a "kingmaker" in their politics in the first place.

 

[Chinner]

They kind of look similar, but otherwise I don't see your point

they're just the next generation of blarites.

 

[Funky Papa]

Its terrible for shopowners. Stock will lose value overnight.

I honestly don't get it. Years ago (we are talking before-euro times) Spain made a lot of money thanks to the then low price of the peseta. Britons, Frenchs and Germans came here to raid the shops as soon as they got vacations.

 

[Walshicus]

Its terrible for shopowners. Stock will lose value overnight.

For some.

Currency devaluing as a result of uncertainty from investors following a change in government... will almost certainly self correct. And if it doesn't, exporters' joy will certainly compensate for retailers woes.

 

[Chinner]

jesus christ, what is this shit
http://londonersdiary.standard.co.uk/2010/03/maggie-makes-her-mark-on-the-club-scene.html

Maggie makes her mark on the club scene

Move over, Mahiki. Nightclub entrepreneurs Charlie Gilkes and Duncan Stirling are soon to launch Maggie’s, a new Eighties-inspired club in Chelsea, in honour of Lady Thatcher. David Cameron may be reluctant to embrace Thatcherism but London’s hip and trendy young things certainly aren’t.

The club, on Fulham Road, will pay homage to the decade of kitsch, and Lady Thatcher, who lives within walking distance, has been invited to the opening night next month.
Lucky club-goers will hear famous speeches from the Iron Lady playing in the loos. Thatcher memorabilia will vie for space on the walls, along with such paraphernalia as A Team action men and A-ha platinum discs. Timmy Mallet, John McEnroe and Bananarama will be depicted in a giant mural.

Gilkes, who is also behind the clubs Barts and Kitts, explains: “Duncan and I love the general style and music of the Eighties but have always found
Eighties nights to be cheesy and naff. We wanted to create somewhere which totally encapsulates the period, from its history to its music, drinks and style, where people can relive or indeed live this amazing decade for the first time.
“We want to open a nightclub that transcends politics but it will be open in time for the general election.”


Musicians from the Eighties will DJ, while iconic drinks such as Babycham will be served at the bar. Staff will be suitably attired in roller skates serving revellers at tables resembling giant Rubik’s Cubes. No doubt Princes William and Harry and their entourage will be first in the queue.

this is horrible and i hope it fails

 

[funkmasterb]

So...some questions...

Why does every story coming out of the UK sound like you're building a real life 1984 there?
Why can't you kick the ass of someone breaking into your home?
Why do town councils sound like just really shitty HOA's?
If you find a gun, and return it to the police, why would you be arrested?

I just don't fucking get it. It sounds horrible from a personal freedoms perspective.

 

[Subliminal]

So...some questions...

Why does every story coming out of the UK sound like you're building a real life 1984 there?
Why can't you kick the ass of someone breaking into your home?
Why do town councils sound like just really shitty HOA's?
If you find a gun, and return it to the police, why would you be arrested?

I just don't fucking get it. It sounds horrible from a personal freedoms perspective.

No.

Just every news article you've seen has probably had some Daily Mail Spin on it.

 

[killer_clank]

No.

Just every news article you've seen has probably had some Daily Mail Spin on it.

The right wing press lives off scaring people.

 

[Chinner]

The right wing press lives off scaring people.

It doesn't really live off it, it just gives their audience what they want.

 

[SoulPlaya]

basically this:

I'm sorry, but :lol

 

[Cindres]

Oh it's not some 1984 state.
People forget palces like australia with increasingly stupid censorship laws, or all the many horror stories of police bruatility and bullshit in the states when they're saying we're all under the watchful eye of big brother.

 

[Joel Was Right]

:lol :lol

 

[funkmasterb]

No.
Just every news article you've seen has probably had some Daily Mail Spin on it.

I don't read the daily mail, it's a rag.



http://www.thisissurreytoday.co.uk/...nding-gun/article-1509082-detail/article.html

^Immediate arrest following returning weapon to police.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/beds/bucks/herts/8413787.stm

^Attacking intruder

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/8551188.stm

^Nanny state

http://www.wired.com/dangerroom/2009/08/uk-anti-terror-technology-007-or-1984/

^10k video cameras?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serious_Organised_Crime_and_Police_Act_2005
^
Serious Organised Crime and Police Act. Hugely abusable.



Tell me I'm not the only person who sees a steady erosion of freedoms?