This fedora meme is one of the most obnoxious ones doing the rounds of the internet today.
Pls respond
This fedora meme is one of the most obnoxious ones doing the rounds of the internet today.
I think my problem with that is, I know quite a few people who will have a loooot of trouble finding someone without significant changes to who they are. Being themselves is why they're lonely. I don't think there's anything wrong with changing who you are, even if the reason is just to have more friends.
Reading threads like this just makes me glad I missed that whole dating thing and just skipped straight to the fucking bit.
I just woke up and already there's one of these threads on GAF.
I'm dying here. My coworkers are looking at me like I'm nuts cause I have a stupid shit-eating grin on my face as I try not to bust out laughing at this last page.
Damn you, all. DAMN YOU.
Pls respond
This fedora meme is one of the most obnoxious ones doing the rounds of the internet today.
Pls respond
why is OT so filled with these romance threads
pls respond
Um.
What? Where does what I'm attracted to come into this?
People are attracted to a vast array of qualities. If you are trying to attract someone who is not attracted to your particular subset of traits, faking what they might like makes for a really shitty relationship.
So yes, be yourself, and you'll attract the type of people you are compatible with.
pablum followed by contradiction said:Be yourself, be nice because that's literally the least you can do, and don't let people walk all over you.
Power of the neck tattoo?
"Be yourself, but also be nice and don't be a pushover" because those are qualities you - and, you assume, a majority of women - find attractive in people. You're not really saying be yourself. You're saying be attractive according to that standard you've set. I agree with you; a guy should strive to be an attractive person if he wants to be successful with women.
"Be yourself," on the other hand, means nothing and is terrible advice.
This fedora meme is one of the most obnoxious ones doing the rounds of the internet today.
I have (had) an Audi (A3 hatchback). It was nice!
Threads like these just serve to confuse me and make me even more hesitant to try dating at some point. My first love was a girl I met the first day of high school ( not on that day though lol) and our relationship including the eventual marriage lasted just over 10 years. Being in a lesbian relationship was a bigger hardship due to other's reactions than the awkward teenage dating phase was.
I haven't tried dating since the divorce and I have no idea what the hell proper dating etiquette is these days. I don't know what people expect of each other and what behaviors or phrases have secret messages attached. Added to that is the fact that while I have an interest in men as well as women I have even less of an idea of how to interact with them in that sort of setting.
Why the hell is everything so complicated? How am I supposed to tell genuinely good people from "nice guys/girls"? How do you not give "confusing signals' and end up being the source of people's ire for unintentionally misleading them?
Put me in the camp that says "be yourself" is pretty useless, terrible advice. "Don't fake interests or skills you don't have in an attempt to falsely seem more attractive then you think you are" is just fine, as far as advice goes, but "be yourself" can just as easily mean "the problem is them, not you, so don't bother examining yourself or striving to improve since that would somehow be betraying your specialness"
So lets be specific when we give advice
Is this a reference I'm not getting?
Why the hell is everything so complicated? How am I supposed to tell genuinely good people from "nice guys/girls"? How do you not give "confusing signals' and end up being the source of people's ire for unintentionally misleading them?
Though the article was confirmed troll, no?
Put me in the camp that says "be yourself" is pretty useless, terrible advice. "Don't fake interests or skills you don't have in an attempt to falsely seem more attractive then you think you are" is just fine, as far as advice goes, but "be yourself" can just as easily mean "the problem is them, not you, so don't bother examining yourself or striving to improve since that would somehow be betraying your specialness"
So lets be specific when we give advice
"Be yourself, but also be nice and don't be a pushover" because those are qualities you - and, you assume, a majority of women - find attractive in people. You're not really saying be yourself. You're saying be attractive according to that standard you've set. I agree with you; a guy should strive to be an attractive person if he wants to be successful with women.
"Be yourself," on the other hand, means nothing and is terrible advice.
No. "Be yourself" is advice saying you shouldn't hide what you like and fake your interests.
Improving yourself doesn't mean changing who you are.
"the problem is them, not you, so don't bother examining yourself or striving to improve since that would somehow be betraying your specialness"
Maybe we should be saying 'don't be fake', but seriously, be yourself is general because everyone has unique things and we can't be specific about shit unless we have a hidden camera watching all your social interactions, you know?
I have a neck tattoo of a fedora.
I have a neck tattoo of a neck beard.
Examining yourself and striving to improve should usually be done in an introspective, "do it for yourself, not someone else" way - examining yourself in the context of pleasing someone else is not very productive or lasting.
I'm just saying that I think "don't be fake" has much less room for misinterpretation, willful or genuine. I've never liked that "be yourself" can carry connotations of "don't change", since I think changing is an incredibly important part of the human experience.
Apparently it also means adding new interests that other people will find attractive. Be yourself! But also cook and rock climb because those are cool.
Seriously, y'all can be honest. It's not going to hurt you. It'll keep you from saying things like this:
I have a neck tattoo of a neck beard.
"In your twenties you barely gave me the time of day. Meanwhile you were jumping in bed with any guy with a neck tattoo or a prison record."
Please respond.We're going to run that one into the ground. Again.
I created a fedora out of a neck beard.
Apparently it also means adding new interests that other people will find attractive. Be yourself! But also cook and rock climb because those are cool.
Seriously, y'all can be honest. It's not going to hurt you. It'll keep you from saying things like this:
Apparently it also means adding new interests that other people will find attractive. Be yourself! But also cook and rock climb because those are cool.
Seriously, y'all can be honest. It's not going to hurt you. It'll keep you from saying things like this:
i have to wonder ...
if being nice to girls whom your interested in converts you into a neckbeard salty fedora wielder douchebag ...
then, should it expected for guys to treat them with no respect?
How about this: be the best person you can be without betraying who you really are.
You are kinda hilarious.
Are you trolling right now? I was using examples, not listing out shit I'm attracted to. I fucking hate rock climbing and have no interest in it thanks.
I'm being completely honest. Getting out in the world, interacting with people, and discovering new things that you like and enjoy isn't changing who you are.
...if you're not an active person maybe you should stop trying to date women who are attracted to active men?
I mean, it's just a thought.
i have to wonder ...
if being nice to girls whom your interested in converts you into a neckbeard salty fedora wielder douchebag ...
then, should it expected for guys to treat them with no respect?
Or can we just stop beating around the bush: Be attractive. Here are things that most people find attractive...
Or can we just stop beating around the bush: Be attractive. Here are things that most people find attractive...
One? Today is a landmark day for the socially confused and angry, RS.
And your coworkers think you're nuts anyway. It just goes with the territory.
Or can we just stop beating around the bush: Be attractive. Here are things that most people find attractive...
I really can't figure out how you still don't understand that that is literally change.
But thanks I think I'm hilarious, too.
You're right. And pale shut-ins who live their lives through the internet should stop trying to date women who aren't into that. It'll eventually work out.
Oh right, I see.
Amusingly, the only thing on my neck is a surgical scar from a biopsy operation over a decade ago.Dating is difficult when you're trying to come to terms with both your gender and sexual identity surrounded by people who confuse cancer with STDs.
People who put others down are dicks, and fair exchange of courtesy is best, of course, but you want people to give you kudos for being a normal, decent human being...? It's a baseline, man. Not something you get extra points for.
not sure why anyone is surprised by the 'be honest about yourself' pushback. happens every time.
Hey, I know pale shut-ins who are in relationships.
The point is, if you're not willing to improve in a certain area or learn something new, if you don't have that natural passion, stop expecting to get with people for whom those are attractive traits.