Guy-GAF, Why Do You Hate Anal Sex?
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Captain Europe
Member
You don't sound very knowledgeable about this subject, if you clean your butthole in the shower and your body functions normally, you won't have residue in your anus.
evil solrac v3.0
Member
girl has tried on more than a few occasions to put a finger up there. IT. FUCKING. HURTS.
Ewwww.
Captain Europe
Member
Thread isn't about poop.
Maybe if you sneezed a couple more times it would start to feel gud.
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
I'm caught between wanting to answer the question honestly but also have become more aware of all the crazy shit I've written with my GAF name. So, carefully: I would love to get into it but haven't really been able to for a number of reasons. Mostly I guess because my wife, while not against it per se, seems a bit squicked out when we explore there so I tend not to push the issue. But beyond that even, I think I have an odd anatomy down there which makes exploring a bit painful and on occasion bloody. So while it sounds like an awesome idea in theory it's and bit of a pain in the arse to follow through on.
Double bum pun, get in.
Double bum pun, get in.
Captain Europe
Member
I lol'd!
Chagrijn, just having some fun here regarding some posts in this topic.
I've never done it (and don't plan to) but I heard positive stories from friends who did.
Fuark off!
I kid =P
skyfinch
Member
Im currently on the phone with a good friend of mine. Let' s call him John. Anyway, we were talking sports and hunting. Anyway, he wanted to know what vagina tasted like, more importantly, he wanted to know what sex with a woman felt like. Im too tired and angry to answer this fool's stupid ass questions. Does gaf want to help? Please describe in great detail as well. This fool has no sense of iimagination.
Vigilant Walrus
Member
I have a hairy butthole. I'm so ashamed.
CadetMahoney
Member
shit leftovers are the best part.
but seriously in porn they do have thorough enemas to make sure.
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
Tell him it feels much like having sex with a dog but less scratchy. He'll understand where you're coming from.
Barrylocke
Member
One thing that people who are worried about the pain side of things should remember is that it tends to be more pleasant when the receiver is able to relax. If they're tense and worried (very understandable if it's a surprise entry or they're exploring this new way to play) , it's just going to be worse for them.
I have a theory as to one reason that anal play can come be more pleasurable than a bowel movement. Usually something being inserted in for pleasure is being guided by someone (you or your partner) and so its not going to really get stuck inside of you (unless you do something really stupid like shoving a Lego Block inside of you). Plus, you're usually pretty tense when you're on the toilet, straining to remove the waste from your body. That's the opposite of what I pointed out in the last paragraph, so it makes sense that it's less pleasure and more discomfort.
And finally, on a personal note, I always thought fingers were less enjoyable than penises. They're pokey and oddly shaped, and that's not even factoring in potential nails (ouuuch...). I've have success with digits, but it seems to require more skill/communication than the "normal" way does. Rimming of course is very painless, and most people who get into it seem to enjoy it to some degree but it obviously requires even more boundary crossing than penis or even finger inside of anus does.
On another note, I think this is the most I've ever typed about anal sex. I hope you people in this thread are proud.
I have a theory as to one reason that anal play can come be more pleasurable than a bowel movement. Usually something being inserted in for pleasure is being guided by someone (you or your partner) and so its not going to really get stuck inside of you (unless you do something really stupid like shoving a Lego Block inside of you). Plus, you're usually pretty tense when you're on the toilet, straining to remove the waste from your body. That's the opposite of what I pointed out in the last paragraph, so it makes sense that it's less pleasure and more discomfort.
And finally, on a personal note, I always thought fingers were less enjoyable than penises. They're pokey and oddly shaped, and that's not even factoring in potential nails (ouuuch...). I've have success with digits, but it seems to require more skill/communication than the "normal" way does. Rimming of course is very painless, and most people who get into it seem to enjoy it to some degree but it obviously requires even more boundary crossing than penis or even finger inside of anus does.
On another note, I think this is the most I've ever typed about anal sex. I hope you people in this thread are proud.
kurisu_1974
Banned
Yeah, no thanks. I'm glad it works for you, but I think it's silly to think we're all crazy because we don't want to clean the inside of our colon so that people can safely stick stuff up our asses.
user8503492
Banned
Took some years of trial and error but now the wife allows me about 50% to finish off in the bum. She cums super hard that way but admits its still uncomfortable to a degree. On occasion shes actually told me "Fuck my ass!" and Im obliged to do so lol.
Im a sadist tho I think, I get off of the "hurt" aspect of it. It goes up there with choking, smacking, etc for me in enjoyment.
My wife's a lube, it still kinda hurts, I'm gonna cum in 5 min of it, then your done...which is ok.
An ex was a lube, fuck her ass for an hour type...basically became "ass-pussy" and was boring.
ex-ex was a no lube but spit screaming hard, maybe a whimper, ass fuck...and it was great!
I wouldn't experiment with my own bum anymore. I'm in my late 30's and have had a roid or two and if I dont watch my fiber intake some weeks I'll have problems even pooping. My ass is a minefield. In the past tho during a little ass play it was ok. I cant keep a boner tho once something goes in my ass. It becomes a weird tug/suck on a limp dick, even my cum looks odd.
Also never had a shitty dick..well ALL shitty. Had MANY dab of poo's right on the head of my dick. I take its just my clock smacking against that poo waaaaaay up in the intestine. Its not in the "chamber" just yet, but will be and Im just giving it a tap.
Im a sadist tho I think, I get off of the "hurt" aspect of it. It goes up there with choking, smacking, etc for me in enjoyment.
My wife's a lube, it still kinda hurts, I'm gonna cum in 5 min of it, then your done...which is ok.
An ex was a lube, fuck her ass for an hour type...basically became "ass-pussy" and was boring.
ex-ex was a no lube but spit screaming hard, maybe a whimper, ass fuck...and it was great!
I wouldn't experiment with my own bum anymore. I'm in my late 30's and have had a roid or two and if I dont watch my fiber intake some weeks I'll have problems even pooping. My ass is a minefield. In the past tho during a little ass play it was ok. I cant keep a boner tho once something goes in my ass. It becomes a weird tug/suck on a limp dick, even my cum looks odd.
Also never had a shitty dick..well ALL shitty. Had MANY dab of poo's right on the head of my dick. I take its just my clock smacking against that poo waaaaaay up in the intestine. Its not in the "chamber" just yet, but will be and Im just giving it a tap.
Your GF probably does a lot of maintenance work down there, just because of their monthly blood gush, and for your sake. Show a little appreciation for that work, thank you very much. There's nothing silly about it whatsoever, it's just another kind of bodily maintenance.
HUELEN10
Member
God dammit, I read this in his voice.
Fairly sure you don't generally don't need an enema to do so safely, unless you consider anything less than total cleanliness (which is an unrealistic expectation for any orifice, really, but the option's there) to be "unsafe".
This must be a heck of a thread for you, then.
Barrylocke
Member
*cringe*. Well, if all parties enjoyed themselves, I suppose.
Protip to anyone looking to try stuff though. Spit only is generally not advised. Get some lube, ideally lube made for this sort of thing (like KY), but if not, at least something like lotion. Spit is not as much of a magical lube as porn implies. That stuff dries fast.
That's not true. Have you ever seen pictures of a GI tract? Not only is there microscopic residue you can't see, there's flecks of poo gunk trapped in between the ridges of the colon even after you take a medicine that wipes you out clean for a colonoscopy.
I guess you could enema though..
Ingueferroque
Banned
They do?
For the record: my boyfriend and I have fucked each other several times and we can count the number of times we ended up with any poo or smell on our dicks on one hand and we have never used an enema. You really don't need to enema if you shit properly. If you're one of those guys who takes 15 minutes to squeeze out a log, god help you.
biggersmaller
Banned
There was a friend I had a drunken one-night stand with that put her finger up there without asking. Never before had I jumped so high, LOL.
Later out if curiosity I tried it alone a couple more times. My experience in no way matched the OP's experience of a hugely enhanced orgasm - I also know not all gay men share his enthusiasm.
Later out if curiosity I tried it alone a couple more times. My experience in no way matched the OP's experience of a hugely enhanced orgasm - I also know not all gay men share his enthusiasm.
WanderingWind
Mecklemore Is My Favorite Wrapper
So then there is poo.
Taco_Human
Member
Have yet to try it. I plan on it, as my girlfriend did want to do it to me since I like it up there with here. It's the forbidden thing I get once every long time. Only fair she does the same to me.
Spider from Mars
tap that thorax
Spit
Monocle
Member
I'm not sure how guys who don't do anal think guys who do anal do anal, but if poop is encountered during the deed, you're doing it wrong. Prep, it's a thing.
BTW, gay people don't like poop either. (Except for the extremely rare weirdos who do.)
BTW, gay people don't like poop either. (Except for the extremely rare weirdos who do.)
ROFL, this made my day.¯_(ツ_/¯
Funky Papa
FUNK-Y-PPA-4
Eh, there are a crapload (har har har) of issues to overcome, some with more substance (HAR HAR HAR) than others.
First there's the fact that nature and society has taught heterosexual males that we are in the giving end and females are on the receiving end. Then there's the societal problem of buttsecs traditionally being considered across nearly all cultures as an act of domination, which doesn't sit well (oh dear, I can't stop myself) with plenty of males. Then't there's the pain/"but I poop from there" issue, which is VERY REAL and kind of related to the logistics needed in order to not make a mess you'll remember till the end of your days, which is no small thing.
Basically, there's a lot of work to do in order to convince a male (specially an heterosexual male) to experiment with his cloaca in ways Mother Nature did not anticipate. Also, plenty of females may find it gross for the same reasons they don't want to be on the receiving end and/or think it's something purely gay (read: "is my boyfriend secretly gay?")
First there's the fact that nature and society has taught heterosexual males that we are in the giving end and females are on the receiving end. Then there's the societal problem of buttsecs traditionally being considered across nearly all cultures as an act of domination, which doesn't sit well (oh dear, I can't stop myself) with plenty of males. Then't there's the pain/"but I poop from there" issue, which is VERY REAL and kind of related to the logistics needed in order to not make a mess you'll remember till the end of your days, which is no small thing.
Basically, there's a lot of work to do in order to convince a male (specially an heterosexual male) to experiment with his cloaca in ways Mother Nature did not anticipate. Also, plenty of females may find it gross for the same reasons they don't want to be on the receiving end and/or think it's something purely gay (read: "is my boyfriend secretly gay?")
I've been looking for an excuse to post that picture forever. Asa Akira's Twitter is a riot and half.
Captain Europe
Member
Yes it is, and I don't believe a normal human penis/finger can reach the colon lol.
If you have healthy bowl movements and a properly functioning rectum, coupled with a shower, you won't have poo gunk in there. Enemas aren't necessary unless your body isn't functioning properly.
As for microscopic shit, I suppose everyone is super worried about there phones and keyboards having more bacteria than a public toilet. I have yet to meet anyone who cleans their electronics with alcohol daily like me.... hyperboles.
CornBurrito
Member
Aren't there microscopic shit particles on most everything? I remember reading that somewhere. Especially our cell phones.
Funky Papa
FUNK-Y-PPA-4
Captain Europe
Member
This.
My asshole has its own beard and then some. I wish for some sort of device that would suck most of the hair out. I guess asshole waxing exists, but damn, I don't want to resort to that.
I could beard two or three men with my asshole hair.
WanderingWind
Mecklemore Is My Favorite Wrapper
Sho_Nuff82
Member
In one of my undergraduate labs, we actually did an anal swab and cultured it overnight. The results were...unpleasant.
The Albatross
Member
This is pretty much our position as well.
.. position.
Do you give yourself an enema in the shower?
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
This thread is amusing for the collision of perverts and clean-freaks. GAF definitely has more than it's fair share of OCD clean folks who I'm surprised can even bring themselves to wipe their own arses. This worldview is of course incompatible with good sex, and def doesn't fit with anal. Sometimes there's poop, you go wash it off. It's worth it.
peanutbutterlatte
Member
I'd be perfectly willing to try it with the proper amount of lube. But then I'd do anything to create some excitement in my sex life right now.
Barrylocke
Member
I tried that one time. I felt weird for days, and the hair stays now.
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
Now all I can imagine is that your arsehole looks like Bryan Cranston's mouth.
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