Confrontation
Member
Damn son. Spitting truth.
When you hit 30 as a virgin, you become a wizard. But what kind of wizard?
- Thread starter Burger_Baron
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Damn son. Spitting truth.
Confrontation said:
I don't think it was particularly truthful or constructive, to be honest. It once again paints people who can't obtain sex as somehow being inadequate or non-functioning. It implies a level of importance for sex that is simply not fair to apply across the board, and gives undue pressure to those who absolutely do want to get laid but have mental barriers to that.
It's so much easier for those who don't understand and experience those mental barriers to say "get over it man." But life doesn't actually work like that, no matter what machismo bravado we put on to make ourselves feel superior to those who have difficulties. People really do have social anxiety, depression, emotional disorders. Some people really do have a level of physical unattractiveness that puts them at a disadvantage, and no amount of big talking will change that. Trying to 'one size fits all' a problem is hardly a solution and becomes often, as was the case with Bobandy's post, insulting instead.
Is it really helpful to once again fall back to lazy insults and eye rolling references to fedora's? SOME people who are virgins may be lazy and not trying hard enough, but if you read through this topic many others have issues of a different sort. It's really a bit shameful that some people would rather act like they're in high school bullying the nerdy kids instead of trying to be constructive.
A baseball player eh, i do wear a lot of Yankee hats haha.
You know what I don't like? My snozz. Without being attracted to dudes, do you think my nose is as big and ugly as I feel it is? I could never get around that when I look at myself, even when I'm reasonably happy with where I'm at haha
It's all good
Thank you! And yes, I enjoy being weird lol. And looking forward to my wizard powers
If you could have any one wizard power, what would it be?
Dice
Pokémon Parentage Conspiracy Theorist
Your nose looks perfectly in proportion to the rest of your face in size and structure. If you were a default character in a game that I could mess with in a character editor, I'd probably just roll with default. Anyway, this is quite a tangent from the topic at hand. I think the stunning presumptuousness, insensitivity, and rudeness of some posters in here should be further admonished. It's a shame the posts will probably pass by without even a warning.
Confrontation
Member
Maybe the 'uglier' people are putting the bar a bit high?
Like some said, the means nowadays to get laid are almost endless, but you gotta keep your expectations in check.
You can't expect to get a match from the 'hotties' on Tinder for example when looks are all that matter.
Hitting a gym will go a long way in improving your confidence and looks. That's a start.
Become succesful. I've got some ugly as shit buddies of mine, but they're dating pretty girl because they have an awesome job and are doing something with their life and are going places.
It's amazing what a bit of confidence does with people.
And the 'Damn son' was just referring that that Junior don't give a damn lol.
I agree that in some cases, the solution is that they need to be more realistic. But the point I'm making is that it's not a "one size fits all" solution. Sometimes that works, other times it does not. Sometimes these issues recycle themselves into a state of mental despair that truly cripples peoples ability to act. Sometimes they already have social anxiety/depression/emotional disabilities that already give them a huge handicap in the approach.
And so..
...it's not just cut and dry to say "well do X, Y and Z." I can say that for some people, getting in shape might be the answer. But some people can be in the fittest shape of their life and still be miserably depressed and lack any and all self-confidence. Similarly, some people have very unique personalities defined by any potential thousand reasons, and they might have a very difficult time conversing with someone they're attracted to or making themselves interesting enough to be appealing. Maybe this disconnect again makes it difficult for them to see a path around it to get to a point where they can be sexually intimate with someone.
Additionally, saying "become successful" is at best a nice thing to say, at worst it's an unrealistic expectation set up by the modern capitalist drive to believe everyone can just win the world if they just try their darndest. But the reality is some people will try and try and try and still never become successful, at least if we're defining success by financial security and upward mobility. We just don't live in a world where everyone can be successful, and we also live in a world where it is impossible to deny that the inherent privileges some are born with give them a massive advantage in the rat race to actually reach that success.
Just because your buddy Ahab came from nothing and is now a millionaire does not change that people born into pitiable socioeconomic conditions are infinitely more likely to end up in shit elementary schools, middle schools and high schools. This makes it far more likely they are going to receive a shit education at the most important formative years in their life. This by extension means they will be far less competitive when trying to get into decent colleges. And because they are likely to be in conditions that are poor, they are going to need financial assistance to even make it into a decent college. Much of the time the tightening filter will destroy those less advantaged.
So, while we can say "success and power attracts people", the truth is not everyone will be able to obtain that.
Not everyone can just pull themselves up by the bootstraps. And as such, being successful and working out are not going to work for everyone. Additionally, we're still once again having to recognize that being successful and being fit does not change that you may still suffer from one of these emotionally draining mental disorders, which cripple ones ability to play the game properly by society's "normative" standards.
I guess my point is it's important for us to understand that while it's OK to have a bit of a laugh at the awkwardness of this situation and to know how uncomfortable this can be, it's not OK to be serious in our attempt to dismiss people in this situation as lazy or nonfunctional or somehow less of a normal human being. Sometimes we have to acknowledge that this issue can be terribly difficult for some, and that the solutions we propose can only work in some cases.
And there's a horrifying feeling that you might end up trying everything and still not succeeding. And that's the scariest thought of all: That maybe you are right about the worst aspects of your internal thoughts about yourself. Think about how terrifying that is for someone who does want to experience that deep physical intimacy, and yet comes to a fork in the road where he can see no further solutions to try.
It takes courage to start going down that road to see if anything can work for you personally. And I think being encouraging is the best approach.
Understood. My disappointment was pretty much aimed at Bobandy anyway.
Someone will have to tell me what awesome wizard powers I'm supposed to have because I haven't found them yet!
Mine is a unique enough case, I should think. When I was a toddler, my parents noticed that my sister, a year younger than me, was growing faster than I was. After a number of tests I was put on growth hormone injections, and a few years later, after more tests, I was given Eltroxin tablets to take daily, in place of my thyroid glands which didn't seem to be working. Various scans were performed on me over the years, but the CAT scans (I believe they're called CT scans nowadays) could never find anything, so on went the injections and tablets.
Then, when I was fifteen, I became very sick and started vomiting up large amounts of blood. I was rushed to the hospital where I steadily got better - again they ran numerous tests and couldn't find anything. I had to have several blood transfusions that were quite big, though I can't remember the exact number. Regardless, I now had another tablet to add to the mix - Hydrocortisone, which takes the place of my immune system. To this day we don't know what caused that, and they were afraid it might happen again and actually seriously hurt me, but thankfully it never has.
When I turned sixteen, the hospital got one of the then-new MRI machines, and I was one of the first patients to use it - I remember the smell of fresh paint and the construction crew still putting the finishing touches to the small extension where the MRI Unit still sits today. The MRI showed my brain off in much better detail than the CAT scans did, and finally the cause of my issues (apart from the vomiting blood thing) - a fatty substance was found to be lodged between my pituitary gland and my brain. Now, the pituitary gland controls all the major glands in the body, and because of this fatty substance, mine had never developed properly. You can see where this is going. There was some talk of some extremely complex and possibly dangerous surgery to remove this substance, but the specialist decided against it as it was too invasive for too little gain - there was no proof the gland would develop properly at this late stage once the substance was removed.
The specialist decided to see how I would develop naturally over the next few years - my voice had broken by this point and I had pubic hair, but I never developed hair under my armpits, on my chest and I never needed to shave. I was perfectly fine with the latter, and still am to this day. I rebelled against all this medicine at some point. I never felt any different, I thought, when I did and didn't take my tablets, so I went off them. I pretended that I was still on the tablets, but I stopped taking the injections altogether, and refused to take them, since my body did tend to grow a little on it's own. The doctors didn't like this, but I was adamant. No more injections. I was still a fairly short size and I convinced myself and the doctors (if not my mother) that I was happy enough with my height.
Of course, what growth I did experience was minimal, and that had an effect. Normally when you experience the last stages of growth, you lose your puppy fat as the bones in your face lengthen in a final growth spurt and finally fuse together. Well, at twenty I looked like a sixteen year old, as the bones in my face fused, and to this day, at thirty six years old, I still look like a sixteen year old. It was and still is an extremely annoying inconvenience I have to go through when I'm forced to tell someone my age, go through the usual rigmarole of their astonishment and my patience as I explain it, then have them tell me it's an awesome thing and I should be grateful, yadda yadda.
At age twenty I was put on a new injection - testosterone replacement. Given once per month by my doctor, I hated and still hate taking the stuff. I never had to go through puberty like most guys, where your dick will act as if it has a mind of it's own, and I found it really difficult to deal with. I could be sitting down at home watching tv or something with friends, not even remotely thinking of anything sexy, and bing! Sudden erection for no damned reason other than my body decided that it needed to suddenly rush a large amount of blood there. I wear tracksuit pants at home and I'd find myself unable to get up and go get a drink until it went back down again.
The injections were replaced by patches which I could apply myself, but they irritated my skin, so were replaced by a cream. I told the doctors that I hated taking them but they insisted that they are essential for my health. Well, my years of ignoring them has now borne fruit in that I am osteopoenic (I have brittle bones) and it's getting worse. Even now, I still barely take my tablets and much less so the damnable testosterone, but I've made myself a promise to get back to taking them regularly. I get a lot of calcium and protein intake every day, so hopefully there'll be signs of improvement by the time my next bone density scan is due.
Anyway, you can imagine what kind of neurotic mess this has made me when it comes to relationships. One girl did show interest when I was seventeen, but she lived on the opposite side of the country and moved to another country soon after anyway, and I'm fairly sure she was drunk that night considering how differently she acted towards me the following day or two (that I heard her brother asking her about - she looked in my direction and blushed, saying she wasn't, but I pretended not to have heard them). I've had to grow up with all this shit as well as a complete asshole of a father who I'd never gotten on with (my mother finally saw the error of her ways and seperated from him when I was 24). My maternal grandfather was more of a father figure to me than he ever was, and he unfortunately died when I was fourteen. I also just did not want to grow up, because it was awkward and I was miserable at school and had so much more fun as a child.
Add to that mess a bundle of nerves and you have one very awkward short, young looking fool of a man who has been a virgin all his life. One other girl apparently showed interest one night when I was at a club with friends, as they all insisted at various times throughout the night, but I was so drunk I could barely see past arm's length. Since then, nobody has come knocking and I've not gone out looking for anybody myself. When I was a child, I always thought I'd end up married. When I passed through puberty and into adulthood I realised that possibility was very low. When it came to sex, from around the age of fifteen up until the age of twenty five I had a policy of not worrying about it because it'll happen when it happens. It never did happen, of course, and I learned to accept it.
So now I'm thirty six, still look like a sixteen year old, and I'm still and, at this point, always will be a virgin. I've come to terms with that long ago, so I'm fine with it. There's no pressure at all, and I do alright on my own. I realise I may have some issues worthy of counciling but I'm not bothered at all. If a woman asked me out, I'd find some way of turning her down that didn't hurt her feelings (not, thankfully, that any woman ever has). I'm not interested in a relationship and least of all would I want to hoist all my emotional problems onto anyone else - I've never spoken of this to anyone, so this is the closest I'll get to it. I'm attracted to women and can appreciate the female form as well as any other man, but I'm just not interested in going any further than looking.
You guys have no idea how freeing it is not to have testosterone running around your system. No unwanted erections, no pressure to relieve yourself by masturbating, no women on your mind 24/7 that guys going through puberty seem to have to deal with... none of that. It's no wonder I hate taking the stuff, even if I should for health reasons.
I'm not asking for advice or anything, but I thought my story would be relevant to people who think guys who are still virgins after a certain age should "just get over it".
Mine is a unique enough case, I should think. When I was a toddler, my parents noticed that my sister, a year younger than me, was growing faster than I was. After a number of tests I was put on growth hormone injections, and a few years later, after more tests, I was given Eltroxin tablets to take daily, in place of my thyroid glands which didn't seem to be working. Various scans were performed on me over the years, but the CAT scans (I believe they're called CT scans nowadays) could never find anything, so on went the injections and tablets.
Then, when I was fifteen, I became very sick and started vomiting up large amounts of blood. I was rushed to the hospital where I steadily got better - again they ran numerous tests and couldn't find anything. I had to have several blood transfusions that were quite big, though I can't remember the exact number. Regardless, I now had another tablet to add to the mix - Hydrocortisone, which takes the place of my immune system. To this day we don't know what caused that, and they were afraid it might happen again and actually seriously hurt me, but thankfully it never has.
When I turned sixteen, the hospital got one of the then-new MRI machines, and I was one of the first patients to use it - I remember the smell of fresh paint and the construction crew still putting the finishing touches to the small extension where the MRI Unit still sits today. The MRI showed my brain off in much better detail than the CAT scans did, and finally the cause of my issues (apart from the vomiting blood thing) - a fatty substance was found to be lodged between my pituitary gland and my brain. Now, the pituitary gland controls all the major glands in the body, and because of this fatty substance, mine had never developed properly. You can see where this is going. There was some talk of some extremely complex and possibly dangerous surgery to remove this substance, but the specialist decided against it as it was too invasive for too little gain - there was no proof the gland would develop properly at this late stage once the substance was removed.
The specialist decided to see how I would develop naturally over the next few years - my voice had broken by this point and I had pubic hair, but I never developed hair under my armpits, on my chest and I never needed to shave. I was perfectly fine with the latter, and still am to this day. I rebelled against all this medicine at some point. I never felt any different, I thought, when I did and didn't take my tablets, so I went off them. I pretended that I was still on the tablets, but I stopped taking the injections altogether, and refused to take them, since my body did tend to grow a little on it's own. The doctors didn't like this, but I was adamant. No more injections. I was still a fairly short size and I convinced myself and the doctors (if not my mother) that I was happy enough with my height.
Of course, what growth I did experience was minimal, and that had an effect. Normally when you experience the last stages of growth, you lose your puppy fat as the bones in your face lengthen in a final growth spurt and finally fuse together. Well, at twenty I looked like a sixteen year old, as the bones in my face fused, and to this day, at thirty six years old, I still look like a sixteen year old. It was and still is an extremely annoying inconvenience I have to go through when I'm forced to tell someone my age, go through the usual rigmarole of their astonishment and my patience as I explain it, then have them tell me it's an awesome thing and I should be grateful, yadda yadda.
At age twenty I was put on a new injection - testosterone replacement. Given once per month by my doctor, I hated and still hate taking the stuff. I never had to go through puberty like most guys, where your dick will act as if it has a mind of it's own, and I found it really difficult to deal with. I could be sitting down at home watching tv or something with friends, not even remotely thinking of anything sexy, and bing! Sudden erection for no damned reason other than my body decided that it needed to suddenly rush a large amount of blood there. I wear tracksuit pants at home and I'd find myself unable to get up and go get a drink until it went back down again.
The injections were replaced by patches which I could apply myself, but they irritated my skin, so were replaced by a cream. I told the doctors that I hated taking them but they insisted that they are essential for my health. Well, my years of ignoring them has now borne fruit in that I am osteopoenic (I have brittle bones) and it's getting worse. Even now, I still barely take my tablets and much less so the damnable testosterone, but I've made myself a promise to get back to taking them regularly. I get a lot of calcium and protein intake every day, so hopefully there'll be signs of improvement by the time my next bone density scan is due.
Anyway, you can imagine what kind of neurotic mess this has made me when it comes to relationships. One girl did show interest when I was seventeen, but she lived on the opposite side of the country and moved to another country soon after anyway, and I'm fairly sure she was drunk that night considering how differently she acted towards me the following day or two (that I heard her brother asking her about - she looked in my direction and blushed, saying she wasn't, but I pretended not to have heard them). I've had to grow up with all this shit as well as a complete asshole of a father who I'd never gotten on with (my mother finally saw the error of her ways and seperated from him when I was 24). My maternal grandfather was more of a father figure to me than he ever was, and he unfortunately died when I was fourteen. I also just did not want to grow up, because it was awkward and I was miserable at school and had so much more fun as a child.
Add to that mess a bundle of nerves and you have one very awkward short, young looking fool of a man who has been a virgin all his life. One other girl apparently showed interest one night when I was at a club with friends, as they all insisted at various times throughout the night, but I was so drunk I could barely see past arm's length. Since then, nobody has come knocking and I've not gone out looking for anybody myself. When I was a child, I always thought I'd end up married. When I passed through puberty and into adulthood I realised that possibility was very low. When it came to sex, from around the age of fifteen up until the age of twenty five I had a policy of not worrying about it because it'll happen when it happens. It never did happen, of course, and I learned to accept it.
So now I'm thirty six, still look like a sixteen year old, and I'm still and, at this point, always will be a virgin. I've come to terms with that long ago, so I'm fine with it. There's no pressure at all, and I do alright on my own. I realise I may have some issues worthy of counciling but I'm not bothered at all. If a woman asked me out, I'd find some way of turning her down that didn't hurt her feelings (not, thankfully, that any woman ever has). I'm not interested in a relationship and least of all would I want to hoist all my emotional problems onto anyone else - I've never spoken of this to anyone, so this is the closest I'll get to it. I'm attracted to women and can appreciate the female form as well as any other man, but I'm just not interested in going any further than looking.
You guys have no idea how freeing it is not to have testosterone running around your system. No unwanted erections, no pressure to relieve yourself by masturbating, no women on your mind 24/7 that guys going through puberty seem to have to deal with... none of that. It's no wonder I hate taking the stuff, even if I should for health reasons.
I'm not asking for advice or anything, but I thought my story would be relevant to people who think guys who are still virgins after a certain age should "just get over it".
i was always wondering what does your title refer to exactly lol
This thread is absolutely insane! People getting into depth about facial structures and shit. I just can't. I believe everyone... well most people have the ability to get laid. Reason why some don't ever or until 30 or whatever I have no clue. I lost mine in my teenage years but I have no clue how I would feel if I lived on this planet for 30 years without connecting with someone intimately. I just don't know that feel.
As for people being mocked and made fun of because of it. That just blows because you are a young adult and people are teasing you about something they all experienced when they were much younger. Honestly If I were a virgin on GAF I would never post in these threads BUT I would read them learn and adapt. That's just me though.
As for people being mocked and made fun of because of it. That just blows because you are a young adult and people are teasing you about something they all experienced when they were much younger. Honestly If I were a virgin on GAF I would never post in these threads BUT I would read them learn and adapt. That's just me though.
You mean my tag?
yeah. I was wondering if I was missing an obvious joke or something, but I can't place it if it's a reference to something
I'm Puerto Rican and Italian/Jewish, so I always get curious when I see something related to Jews. Quirk of my upbringing haha
Once girlgaf wanted a no-boys safe space but Evilore dismissed it as some kind of ghetto so I said "we might as well call womens shelters concentration camps then if we want to dance all the way down to Jewish history town."yeah. I was wondering if I was missing an obvious joke or something, but I can't place it if it's a reference to something
Thought I was getting banned but the next morning I simply had this tag.
haha ok I would NOT have guessed that one. My Jewish curiosity totally was worth it here lol
Crash Station
Member
Damn, that's some heavy stuff. Sorry to hear all that crappy stuff, but I'm glad you're happy with your life.
yeah. I was wondering if I was missing an obvious joke or something, but I can't place it if it's a reference to something
I'm Puerto Rican and Italian/Jewish, so I always get curious when I see something related to Jews. Quirk of my upbringing haha
Huh, had no idea you were also a pizza bagel.
Confrontation
Member
I'm not gonna quote your whole message, I hope you're alright with that.
I actually do believe that almost everyone who had the opportunity to post in this thread, actually lives in a 'world' where they can become successful. I've seen it first hand with my own sister. It's a matter of how badly you want it and what you're willing to do for it.
And honestly, I firmly believe in the sentence 'confidence attracts people (or chicks in this matter)'. It's like women have this extra sense and they can just feel it when a guy is confident and suddenly makes him more attractive.
When I dated this girl when I was 17, she was my first girlfriend. Never got lots of attention from girls in the first place before her and I actually lucked out, cause she was a good friend of my sis. So she got to know me, etc, etc...and boom a little bit later, we were together. Anyway, it was from that moment on when suddenly I started getting looks and smiles from other good looking women.
It was crazy. On the train this chick across from me was all up in my business, at a party a different girl was grinding the living shit of my leg despite me kindly saying 'please stop', even when I went out to a restaurant for dinner all by myself, the waitress was completely into me. This was all within a couple of weeks. That's all because I felt good about myself and was full of confidence. Oh, and I'm an ugly and unsuccessful guy. There is absolutely no way in hell I would ever get a match from an extremely good looking chick on Tinder for example.
Now, last couple of years, I have felt pretty miserable about my life, my career, my looks etc...and haven't dated a chick in this period either. I'm sure that this 'misery' is causing me to not be as attractive to girls as I used to be. 100% sure.
Am I saying this applies to everyone? Of course not. But herein lies the toad of truth.
I can understand there are people who have such a hard time accepting "Why the fuck did get this ugly face" or "Why do I have same amount of hair as the average 95 year old" that it causes psychological issues. It's logical even, in this society where good looks are being shoved down everyone's throat. But the longer you wait with tackling this issue, the harder it'll get.
wondermega
Member
Oh wow, that's quite a story. If you've never heard of it (and given your circumstances I would be rather surprised if you hadn't) you really ought to check out Man Made by Ken Baker http://www.amazon.com/dp/1585420832/?tag=neogaf0e-20
- this guy grew up with a massive testosterone deficiency and didn't realize/correct it until well past his adolescence (mid 20s I think). His body instead was getting massive amounts of estrogen on par with a pregnant woman's, if my memory is correct. You can imagine the havoc this caused for his love life etc to that point. Eventually the issue is addressed and he goes through changes, becomes more chemically "masculine" and turns into somewhat if an asshole in the process. Super fascinating account which I believe many in this thread would benefit from reading, as far as a look at what it means to grow up somewhat gender-neutral (chemically) but still socialized as a male and what that means.. The guy was a guest on Loveline many years ago, that's how I discovered the book. I'll see if u can't dig up the audio of the interview at done point.
I am quite certain that I have a very low level of testosterone. Would explain a lot about my personality. However I kind of like the way I am. Keeps me out of a lot of trouble.
To some of my friends, it's a major deal that I get laid before I leave for Africa. It seems like, at times, they are more concerned about me having sex than I am to get through the whole ordeal! Whenever I see them, I hear, at least once, that I need to get laid before I go overseas.
terrisus
Member
We should get together <3
flaxknuckles
Member
Cheating on your wife I see
Caayn
Member
Still sending those thousans copy-paste messages
Look at it from the positive side. At least the holiday period is over, which for me is the time in which people ask about it the most which only makes it harder.I am not a virgin but I am very much alone and unhappy.
I hate when people hit me with the question, 'why don't you have a girlfriend?'.
Its as if it is something I can just snap my fingers and make happen. I try so hard and yet am still alone.
I agree, I too hate it when people say such things like it's so easy. Sorry but I'm not so good looking that girls throw themselves at me when I'm in public.
I am not a virgin but I am very much alone and unhappy.
I hate when people hit me with the question, 'why don't you have a girlfriend?'.
Its as if it is something I can just snap my fingers and make happen. I try so hard and yet am still alone.
How old are you?
terrisus
Member
Lord of Castamere
Member
7 years and I will fulfil my life goal. I'm going to take command of the Wizard army, by force if necessary, and end the world.
Sexual frustration, and sexual indifference, will be the doom of all Mankind! HaHHAHAA
Sexual frustration, and sexual indifference, will be the doom of all Mankind! HaHHAHAA
Mechanized
Member
A sad wizard.
No disrespect meant, just joshin around.
I think people get too hung up on sex, the real prize is making a stranger fall in love with you and vice versa, that's magic.
Empty sex for the sake of sex might do some good in breaking down any mental barriers you have and help you gain self confidence though. The only real advice I have, if you get an opportunity, take it. Sex isn't a big deal. It's fun, it feels great, but when its over you still have whatever problems you had before.
No disrespect meant, just joshin around.
I think people get too hung up on sex, the real prize is making a stranger fall in love with you and vice versa, that's magic.
Empty sex for the sake of sex might do some good in breaking down any mental barriers you have and help you gain self confidence though. The only real advice I have, if you get an opportunity, take it. Sex isn't a big deal. It's fun, it feels great, but when its over you still have whatever problems you had before.
Heh it does seem weird that friends sometimes can seem more concerned about how much you got laid than you might be.
Your post reminded me of this time someone at my old job said they hadn't had sex in a decade, and he had two "buddies" that he always hung out with at lunch and during work hours. And like as soon as he announced this fact, they went on this insane crusade to embarrass the fuck out of the guy whenever possible about it. If they were eating lunch and some other casual acquaintance passed by, they'd tell them to sit down and began to explain the entire situation to him/her in agonizing detail.
"Hey Joel here has a serious case of blue balls. Hasn't been laid in ten years. We gotta help him out here!" Awkward chuckles all around.
Some cute girl behind the food line, they'd single her out and drag their friend. "Hey my friend here was really interested in asking you out. I mean you seem cool and all, and he's a nice guy. He's just had a string of bad luck... ten years of bad luck, to be exact. Dude needs to get laid!"
And on and on and so forth. I felt so bad for the guy 'cause he was clearly embarrassed as fuck about it and would complain to me later about it, but he never wanted me to go further with it so I respected his wishes because they weren't from my shop I supervised.
To me it seemed almost like a way to dominate him, like they were doing the "feel better by association of making someone else feel worse" type of thing. But in any event, it's all part of the shit some people have to go through because society deems sex as like the end line goal of every path in life. And it said a lot to me that so many people around that situation just acted like it was normal, like embarrassing the dude for not having sex in a long time was just something anyone would do.
I'd be so bloody pissed if my friends did anything like that! They don't bring it up when we're out in public, since they aren't assholes. Haha. I feel bad for your buddy though, that's pretty rough.
Leeness, I didn't recognize you without your Ellie avatar. Hoping things are going better for you in the dating scene!
Talking more seriously, the thing with sex is that it's enormously important only when you are not having it, so you see this abyss between virgin (not by choice) guys and gals and sexually active people, they are seeing the same issue from extremely different points of view. People shouldn't be that dismissive and say "just get over it", on the other hand people shouldn't get defensive when someone says that, they don't mean to offend, they literally see it that way. It's seriously not a big deal once you have it.
terrisus
Member
Haha
Just saying - it's hard to find someone who actually wants to cuddle, without it having to lead to sex. That would be pretty darn wonderful.
Unfortunately, I don't think my wife would approve >.>
Can I get telekinesis as my main power? That would be so OP!
Boss Doggie
all my loli wolf companions are so moe
Isn't there a powerlevel chart for wizards?
Why do I have to choose, don't I get them all?
Well according to my wizarding manual, Wizards get to choose one primary specializations with two minor arcane arts.
Major specializations include:
Necromancy (Zombies/Mummies/Ghouls)
Summoning (Demons/Fallen Angels/Dark Beasts)
Druidry (Healing Arts - protection spells, wounds, etc)
Chronomancy (Control of space - teleportation, warping - and some control of time... stop the clock temporarily, sometimes reverse a few minutes or go forward a few minutes)
Elements (Ice, Fire, Earth, etc spells. Most wizards apparently can usually only specialize in one or two types of elements in their lives)
Telemancy (Mind control, mind reading, etc)
Minor Arcane Arts include:
Alchemy (potioncraft)
Botany (plantcraft)
Divination (interpret visions of the future, unambiguously see the past)
Animalist (speak to animals, exert some control over them, keep familiars)
Enchanting (embue simple objects with usually elemental flair; like flame swords)
Techdry (wizards who mix magic with technology)
See above!
Cuddlr app not working?
terrisus
Member
Not available for Android, last I heard.
EDIT: Just checked - yeah, still not available for Android =(
Since, when it was announced/posted here, I was pretty interested
Ah didnt know if you were a fruit cultist.
Perhaps Tinder with specific NSA Cuddles ONLY line
grap3fruitman
Banned
Is there a forever-alone thread? I can't seem to find one.
My main will be Chronomancy, along with Animalist and Divination. I'll be the greatest of all wizards! Mwuahahahaha!
infinitys_7th
Member
I actually have a similar medical issue (had a pituitary tumor that damaged it while in middle school). I hated testosterone replacement as well - I hated how it made me feel (in terms of aggressiveness; my sex drive was largely unaffected) and how it seemed to cloud my mind.
I feel like an (ambivalent, gray, demi, whatever) asexual for the most part, though I do get those feelings rarely and I know it will come up in a relationship. I just feel no drive for it on any level near other guys. I feel like an outsider looking in, especially with regards to women. I fall for personalities, not "hotness".
If a girl flirts with/shows interest in me, how can I respond in a way that keeps her interest without pretending to be something I am not? Unless I already know her decently well there is nothing to draw me to her.
What sucks is that I want a close relationship to the point of craving it. I really want someone to connect with emotionally, someone to trust, share life with, and mutually support. . .but I doubt I will ever find someone willing to deal with this.
Caayn
Member
So close, I picked almost exactly the same set except for Divination which I had chosen Techdry instead.
I don't want to know what the future holds, it kinda scares me.
Me_Marcadet
Member
Why would you (or anyone) care that I am confident in my skills and that I am a great lover. You can laugh and think I'm delusional, I'm actually pretty fine with that and will laugh with you, but the agressive tone of your posts make me think you have some personnal issues and seems particuliary angry and sad.
You also seem pretty ignorant. Accidents and sicknesses can affect someone life and make having sex or building a relationship one of the last thing you need to do. If you need someone to talk and iron out your anger issues, you can alway pm me. From a disfunctional person to another, it should be fun !
Hatty
Member
I'm with you pretty much all the way
When I turned 20 or 21 I went to my first physical in ten years and my blood was tested for the first time. Turns out I didn't have any testosterone in my system, like at all. They never figured out why but my pituitary gland never developed so nothing told my body to do the hormone thing. The doctor immediately put me on hormone replacements and I never felt more miserable in my life, I was sluggish even more unmotivated and got aroused without reason. Even still I was not attracted to any of the sexes so it was very frustrating. I have been off the medication for two to three years but now your story has me worried about brittle bones, I guess I should get that checked out
But i'm with you that its awesome being free from the need to sexually relieve yourself. Also I get away with bumbling around sometimes by looking 15-16 at 23
Me_Marcadet
Member
Aren't you just curious ? Seducing a stranger is the same thing as learning to know somemone. With this knowledge, it's easier to seduce someone you know nothing about. You can discuss about anything as long as you keep learning to know the person.
That's one of the things I learned in the past years, everyone could be amazing, you just have to open up and go talk to them and learn about them. When you "seduce" someone, you can decide what kind of relationship you want to share with them. It's really rather simple when you are free of any burden and just enjoy the ride. The most difficult thing is to truly know who you are and not be ashamed of it. It's hard work, especially if you do it alone. Even people who do have relationships and sex haven't done this work and could become an insecure virgin sad fuck with a blink of an eye.
Your case is really special and you shouldn't be ashamed. Would you reject someone just because of a sickness ? If a woman would show interest in you and you are seduced, would you reject her if you learned that she have sickness issues ?
Coinspinner
Member
You know whats so stupid about the whole wizard thing? You spend thirty years learning the spell that makes nude virgins appear in your bedroom, and by then youre half-blind from browsing internet forums and your brain is so addled by memes that you cant remember what's supposed to happen next.
There is a self limiting factor apparently built into the magical nexus which prohibits all but the most powerful Wizards from traveling back or forward in time for more than a few minutes. Manual says the typical master Chronomancer can consistently go back up to 3 minutes, and forward up to 6. Less resistance in the field to go forward since you're traveling with the spacetime continuum.
There must be a legendary artifact that allows me to go back to the 20yrs old myself of last summer and save me from my future mage version.
It's starting to feel like a great movie plot.
Serious talk: i even went to one of Europe's biggest music festival this year where basically everybody had some and i didn't
And i'm being an ignoring, lazy jerk in college, i'm feeling like if i am to become a mage, i'll be an evil wizard.- Status
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