Stripper posts insane story on Twitter with more twists than a Shonda Rhimes script

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jstripes said:
Dude. She conveyed her own story in the way she wanted to. Casually, and with humour.

She expected people to be entertained by it.

Are you saying she's wrong?
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Just to play the other side of the field, the dude didn't say she shouldn't be a writer because of the language she used.

He's saying she shouldn't be a writer because, uh.

Shit. I dunno. What qualifies someone to be a writer other than capably communicating a story through a written medium?
 
XenodudeX said:
I don't agree. I don't see how someone getting shot in the face and human trafficking makes a funny story. I guess I'm just old fashion

I'm not trying to act high and mighty, I just see how this is a funny story regardless how it's told.
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but someone getting shot in the face and human trafficking is as old fashioned as it gets.
 
ruxtpin said:
Should someone post a translated version?

Part 1 -

You should listen to this story. This story is long. I met a white woman at Hooters(TM). I was her waitress. She came in with a big old black man. As a waitress we have to conversations with our customers. I was sitting with the couple and the woman tells me that she dances (aka strips). I said, "Oh yes bitch! Me too!" Then she tells me the giant black man is her sugar daddy and I said "Oh yes bitch! My sugar daddy is at home. I feel you." We found mutual ground over our "hoeism" and exchanged numbers. Both of us agreed that the next time one of us was dancing that the other would join. The couple leaves.
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it already is translated, anyone who can't understand it needs to have their intelligence questioned, go back to school and learn about context clues.
 
Amazing, doubt it's really but it was still entertaining as fuck.

Lol at the people who have "trouble" reading it or are acting so morally superior about an obviously fake story. Y'all must have some sad lives.
 
Sylas said:
Just to play the other side of the field, the dude didn't say she shouldn't be a writer because of the language she used.

He's saying she shouldn't be a writer because, uh.

Shit. I dunno. What qualifies someone to be a writer other than capably communicating a story through a written medium?
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I'm not saying she should be a writer, proper, but she tells a good story.

It's Twitter. It's not a novel. It's closer to pages in a graphic novel.

Anyway, communicating the story is the key thing. Most people can't tell a story worth shit.
 
Stet said:
no, you're wrong because i never mentioned her slang in the first place.

it's a fine story. it's funny. she would make a great internet comedian.
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Then why do you keep mentioning that she is better internet comedian than a writer? It's obviously rooted in her ability to write in slang and "language that everyone posesses" You recoiled against the idea that she should be writing a book. If not for the language, then what?
 
Rembrandt said:
That's lame, it's English regardless. It doesn't need translated because some people are being subtly racist.
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Seriously. We're one post away from someone saying that she needs to stop using "ebonics" and talk in proper English.

People think they're being sneaky/clever with their low-key racism, but they aren't.
 
ruxtpin said:
Should someone post a translated version?

Part 1 -

You should listen to this story. This story is long. I met a white woman at Hooters(TM). I was her waitress. She came in with a big old black man. As a waitress we have to conversations with our customers. I was sitting with the couple and the woman tells me that she dances (aka strips). I said, "Oh yes bitch! Me too!" Then she tells me the giant black man is her sugar daddy and I said "Oh yes bitch! My sugar daddy is at home. I feel you." We found mutual ground over our "hoeism" and exchanged numbers. Both of us agreed that the next time one of us was dancing that the other would join. The couple leaves.
Click to expand...

Nah, if Good Ole Boy English Defense Force wants their sanitized version so it stands proudly among their Sonic fanfics and My Little Pony Dvds the "hoeism" part must be removed too. Maybe replace it by "The Free Love Spectrum" or something.
 
raphier said:
Then why do you keep mentioning that she is better internet comedian than a writer? It's obviously rooted in her ability to write in slang and "language that everyone posesses" You recoiled against the idea that she should be writing a book. If not for the language, then what?
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who said anything about a book?

what on earth?

she told a single story in a way that was okay.
 
GamerJM said:
What if someone actually does have problems understanding context clues?
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I mean... That's a problem with the individual and not the story, in that case?

jstripes said:
I'm not saying she should be a writer, proper, but she tells a good story.

It's Twitter. It's not a novel. It's closer to pages in a graphic novel.

Anyway, communicating the story is the key thing. Most people can't tell a story worth shit.
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Also, yeah. I totally agree with this. Though I stand by the fact that she communicated a story through a written medium and is basically a writer because of that. That sort of humor would be entertaining to read in a longer format, but that's largely up to taste at that point.
 
JDSN said:
Dude learns to read a badly-paced contrieved right-to-left manga that outstays its welcome but cant read a few tweets.
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yo
JDSN said:
Its my second language and I got it all, and im an idiot. Pretending to not understand urban slang is a weird nerd tradition that I dont get, nerds drop Valyrian all the time, talk about their waifus and yaoi shit but when its time to know what is the meaning of "salty" in an obvious context, well they just need to let the world know they dont understand these weird black urban words.

And 20th Centuray boyz aint shit b. ��������
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YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
 
Sylas said:
I mean... That's a problem with the individual and not the story, in that case?
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You're right. But I feel like people who actually legitimately have problems with understanding something deserve more empathy. I'm sure lots of people who complain about the way this is written are legitimately racist, probably way more than people who aren't, but I also don't think it's fair to insult someone just because they can't actually understand context clues very well. That's not something that comes easily to everyone.
 
Lets not act like everyone on here hasn't read a shitty reposted greentext story from 4chan that's equally poorly structured yet is entertaining as shit.

Come on, the internet stories for the past couple years has been built with nothing but run on sentences and memes. If you have problems reading the story back and understanding it them you probably have bigger problems than bitching about 140 character limits.
 
E92 M3 said:
It is surprising they went on a hoe trip after just meeting. Zola has zero fucks given.
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Zola was tryin to make some paper. Clearly she has experience making Call Girl Ads. I thought it was hilarious how the Pimp was treating her like a business partner.
 
Heavy_D206 said:
Zola was tryin to make some paper. Clearly she has experience making Call Girl Ads. I thought it was hilarious how the Pimp was treating her like a business partner.
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Her slow rise in the hoerarchy (hoe-->advertiser--->pimp---> enforcer) was an arc on its own.
 
Jess be reminding me of Asia Argento in The Heart is Deceitful Above All Things. Hope she treated her kid better though...
 
So the late nineties/early two thousands had found footage films, now we have tales told via Twitter. This is going to get popular.

Crazy story, I couldn't stop reading it in the voice of the girl from GTA V with the pick up truck lol.
 
Jag said:
When #floridaman met #blackpeopletwitter

j4Thee8.png
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Oh damn. If the story is real she possibly opened herself up to some legal consequences?
 
Wow this is one of the best things I have read in a while. I've heard similar stories about trafficked girls but not this crazy
 
cashman said:
Human trafficking is hilarious you guys
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cashman said:
My favorite part was obviously the attempted suicide. Hahaha what a loser right guys?
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XenodudeX said:
I'm glad you guys are getting a kick out of this story. Being forced to suck someone off and being fucked anally in front of your boyfriend is pretty funny
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cashman said:
I think this answers the age old question. Rape can indeed be funny
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Trying too hard, man.
 
Man from the way some of you were putting it, it read like crazybuttocks. WTF are you guys on? This is perfectly readable.

Too many smiley faces though 7/10.
 
FZZpure said:
Story wasn't that crazy but still good nonetheless
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Someone got shot in the face
A pimp got his dick sucked by a hoe in front of said hoes boyfriend, to break his manhood
Boyfriend jumps out a fourth floor balcony
The boyfriend can start and stop crying via pure will
 
Some people needing translations or not being able to read much of it because of the language...it isn't like crazy buttocks on a train wrote this.
 
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