Support NeoGAF

[Necromanti]

I don't think that there necessarily needs to be one right way to do things, and that depending on the circumstances, either scenario doesn't need to be unhealthy. Some people put a detrimental amount of investment into pride.

I lived by myself in a different country from 20-24 years old to get my bachelor's degree, but I wasn't really financially independent until I graduated and got my first job. While it would be nice to save an additional ~$17k a year, the freedom and peace of mind are hard to put a price on. It's definitely tough saving up for graduate school, though.

 

[pbsapeer]

There is a reason why this generation is known to live at home for so long. The governments have raised prices of housing that it's almost impossible to save and rent at the same time.
I moved out when at uni and properly moved out when I was 21 with my (now) wife. I couldn't have afforded to do it on my own and wonder what we would have done without each other. System sucks but I don't think anyone should feel ashamed or be shamed from other people for still living at home.

 

[Tevious]

Can you tell us exactly what your education/career trajectory was, why you were unemployed, and what exactly you do in Korea now (hint hint).

Film major, but never had the connections to get any related work outside of my own small projects. I worked overseas in Korea teaching English for some years and then came back to the states for about 10 months unable to find any stable work. Either I didn't have enough experience or I was too overqualified for even crappy part-time jobs (I guess they realize someone with a degree wouldn't stay). So I went back to Korea and I'm self teaching myself some things so I can build a better portfolio and most likely go into business for myself.

There's a thread here on GAF about teaching in Asia, if you're interested.

 

[Relativ9]

You're not a horrible person or anything, but move out man. I'd agree that in most cases "there's no rush", but you're 30 man...there's officially a rush.

I moved out when I was 16 (for school), and only went back for a brief 5 month period when i was 21...and holy shit it sucked. Roomates are a good option, you just need to leave the nest...for everyone's sake.

 

[manfestival]

my game plan was to live with my parents till I turned 25. I ended up leaving when I turned 22 because my step father was a total douchebag about the smallest things for no reason. Which ended up being a fantastic move but I did go through some moments on living alone for a while but there is always an option out there but you need to expand your horizons.
I have lived alone and I have had roommates. I am currently with a roommate and honestly... I think having the right kinda roommate beats out living alone. The only downside is that you have to be considerate sometimes when you know the other person is sleeping or whatever the circumstances may be and no walking around the home naked.

 

[I'm an expert]

Film major, but never had the connections to get any related work outside of my own small projects. I worked overseas in Korea teaching English for some years and then came back to the states for about 10 months unable to find any stable work. Either I didn't have enough experience or I was too overqualified for even crappy part-time jobs (I guess they realize someone with a degree wouldn't stay). So I went back to Korea and I'm self teaching myself some things so I can build a better portfolio and most likely go into business for myself.

There's a thread here on GAF about teaching in Asia, if you're interested.

You're not very familiar with me lol.

 

[Tevious]

You're not very familiar with me lol.

Honestly, I don't pay that well of attention to people's names here. Why? Your question was a joke or something? I just thought you were interested in living in Korea or how I got here or something. I'm so confused now, lol.

 

[Necromanti]

Honestly, I don't pay that well of attention to people's names here. Why? Your question was a joke or something? I just thought you were interested in living in Korea or how I got here or something. I'm so confused now, lol.

He already knew you were teaching English when you mentioned being in Korea.

 

[ZackieChan]

He already knew you were teaching English when you mentioned being in Korea.

Maybe Tevious runs a kebab delivery service there?

 

[Necromanti]

Maybe Tevious runs a kebab delivery service there?

Which there is a criminal shortage of, worldwide, so I'd be down for that.

 

[IpsoFacto]

If I were a parent, I am not sure how I would feel if my kid/s still lived at home into their late 20s/30s.

It depends on the culture... but you'd be surprised how many parents want their kids to stay at home for as long as possible. Yes, even with a job and all. In latino culture (portuguese, spanish, south america), it's common to stay with their parents way past 25 years old.

Having said that, yes I'm in of those situations, partially due to taking forever to finish collegue and I've only actually started working at 28, so joke's on me.

With my current budget, I can only afford to rent a room. But if I get a raise in the near future, renting a studio apartment might not be so hard.

Here's hoping.

 

[LyleLanley]

Unless it is cultural or you have some health related roadblock (you or another family member that you have to care for) preventing you from breaking away, this really isn't an uncommon viewpoint to have.

I imagine when most people, at least here in America, hear that someone lives with their parents at that age they're going to be wondering what's wrong with that person.

 

[FyreWulff]

Around here, families in houses are often 3 generations deep. Whatever works, and I personally do not care if someone lives with their parents or not. Just like any other relationship, if they let their parents walk all over them like a doormat, it doesn't matter if you move out, their parents will still walk all over them like a doormat and the fact that they live outside the house is a mere formality.

I often find people that are concerned with the living situation of others are either insecure or put their nose in business that doesn't hurt them whatsoever.

It's not uncommon around here for people to marry and then they move into one of their parents' house.

 

[QuicheFontaine]

Around here, families in houses are often 3 generations deep. Whatever works, and I personally do not care if someone lives with their parents or not. Just like any other relationship, if they let their parents walk all over them like a doormat, it doesn't matter if you move out, their parents will still walk all over them like a doormat and the fact that they live outside the house is a mere formality.

I often find people that are concerned with the living situation of others are either insecure or put their nose in business that doesn't hurt them whatsoever.

It's not uncommon around here for people to marry and then they move into one of their parents' house.

Where? Why leave out this information?

 

[ibyea]

Yes and no. If you're working retail/fast food through your teens and early 20's, I respect that. If you're still in that same entry level position in your late 20's early 30's and beyond, you've failed. You've become content with your easy breezy lifestyle, you have very little responsibility at work, then you come home to your parents house where you have little/no responsibilities except maybe doing your own laundry and washing dishes. That's a failure IMO.

Not only is working retail/fast food not an easy breezy lifestyle, not only do you know nothing about people who live with their parents, this shows a complete lack of empathy with people who have fallen through the cracks.

 

[Tuffty]

I'm 28 and live at home with parents. I contribute a monthly rent towards the house partly because both parents are retired whose only source of income is through a pension, but mainly that I don't want to be seen as a scrounger! More than that though, it's to keep my mother company. She is the type to worry about any little thing, who will think the worst has happened if you're 10 mins late and is afraid of being on her own. I can see that recently in full force as my dad was admitted to the ICU 3 weeks ago for septic shock and she was damn near inconsolable thinking about life without my dad after being married with him for 42 years. So at the minute, I wouldn't want to move out as I want to be there to care for both of them, especially when dad gets out of hospital.

 

[25_Cans_Of_Bacon]

I'm 38 and live with the folks, so I may be the oldest user (haven't read all the pages yet) here in this situation, I don't know. I kind of have an excuse, as at 20 I was slammed with cancer which I fought on and off throughout my 20s and 30s. To make a very long story short, during those times it was filled with self-harm, mental hospitals, detoxes, and PTSD, all that fun stuff. I'm also Bipolar II as well.

Now I'm out the other side and finally stable enough to go to school and pursue where I left off, but I have to say I'm very ashamed and embarrassed to be with my parents. I crave independence desperately and am working towards finding a means towards it. Every time I hear or read "someone living in their parents' basement", my heart sinks. It hurts. There's absolutely a cultural stigma, and I also come from a very successful family with richy siblings and Ivy league pasts from which I feel like a black sheep in terms of a "successful" life. I'm very grateful I have my parent's support when many others haven't in similar situations, but nonetheless still am very self-conscious about it.

But eh, such is life. Different for everybody, everyone has their different crosses to bear. I admire people who are independent greatly, and can't help but be a bit envious.

 

[nekkid]

I reckon I'd have been the sort of person that would have lived at home well into my 20s, so I'm glad university forced me to have to leave not just home but my home town at 18.

Never lived on my own, per se (always had housemates, girlfriend/wife), but never lived with my parents since then despite moving back to my home town not long after uni ended.

 

[Tevious]

Maybe Tevious runs a kebab delivery service there?

I wish they delivered kebabs or had them all over the place. I have to go to Hongdae or Itaewon for those. Korea needs to branch out faster with a variety of foreign foods.

 

[Anteater]

I live in hong kong

i can't afford to move out

my brother did but he's sharing the rent with his girlfriend and his girlfriend's brother

basically everyone I know/neighbors are living with their family because of the cost

 

[unknownstranger]

I'm 25 right now and still probably won't move out for awhile. I'm autistic and still struggle with so many basic tasks. I do want to at least to try to move out eventually but at the same time I don't know if I could ever live alone. Plus my mom doesn't really want to live alone either. I remember hearing her have a phone conversation a few years ago, a bit after my dad passed away, that when she turned 60 if I still didn't have much of a future that she was going to adopt a child. I still need to try to find a job but I'm so afraid of making mistakes that I back out of them whenever the opportunity comes up. Right now I'm just working on a little more schooling (already have my Associate of Arts degree) until the right opportunity comes up, which might never happen.

 

[I'm an expert]

Honestly, I don't pay that well of attention to people's names here. Why? Your question was a joke or something? I just thought you were interested in living in Korea or how I got here or something. I'm so confused now, lol.

i have never seen your name before or any of your posts, but as soon as you made that one post last page, i knew everything about you, because i have met a million people like you. fuck your life up, then use the ridiculously dumb english in asia get of jail card. i wont go on, you can look up my past posts on what i think of people who go teach in asia as their last resort. or dont. my point was you are the textbook example of everything i wrote the last few pages. if there wasnt a 'teach' in asia industry, think about where you'd be right now. probably living at home, working at walmart. which is the result of your mistakes in your studies, networking, and job hunting. i'm glad you did at least have the selfawareness to admit it in your first post. where's cosmicblizzard? see what i was talking about?

 

[Mendrox]

I'm 25 right now and still probably won't move out for awhile. I'm autistic and still struggle with so many basic tasks. I do want to at least to try to move out eventually but at the same time I don't know if I could ever live alone. Plus my mom doesn't really want to live alone either. I remember hearing her have a phone conversation a few years ago, a bit after my dad passed away, that when she turned 60 if I still didn't have much of a future that she was going to adopt a child. I still need to try to find a job but I'm so afraid of making mistakes that I back out of them whenever the opportunity comes up. Right now I'm just working on a little more schooling (already have my Associate of Arts degree) until the right opportunity comes up, which might never happen.

It's okay to make mistakes. Everyone is afraid even if they are not honest about it. The people that have courage just tell themselves that they shouldn't give a fuck if something happens, because that is life. Talk to yourself by using a mirror and encourage yourself with that. The right opportunity ALWAYS lies in your hands. Do something and something will happen - easy as that.

Wait, so what if you're the subordinate? How do you "work smarter" when people higher up who also want to "work smarter" are making you work harder?

Cute. I like to use people here to my advantage. If I only need 5 minutes for something that looks complicated to them, I can abuse this by giving them my shit work which I only have to verify after they finished. Saves me a ton of time and stress. It's like watching someone use a computer and not doing any shortcuts - so you can do them a "favour" and afterwards give them the shit things.

 

[PulseONE]

In my country, if you move out before 30 you either have a very good job or you're getting married.

I get in America people move out from very young, but I never got the stigma against people who don't. There isn't anything wrong with that. Especially these days when its harder and harder to afford rent.

 

[SliceSabre]

I understand the whole stuck at home with parents thing.

I wasn't able to get out from under my parent's house till I was 25 and got a job that paid well enough to afford the bills I would have and then some because I live alone and only have myself to count on. As for those still in their parent's houses in their late 20 and 30s, I don't judge them to be quite honest. I fully understand life is fucking hard out there and everyone's life situation is different. Hell a lot of people in my family have had to move back in with their folks again in their 40s.

 

[Christhor]

I moved out about half a year ago at 22, bought myself a pretty small, although just recently built apartment. There's no better feeling in the world than owning something of your own. And at the pace I'm saving up money, it looks like I can buy myself a decent house in roughly two years.

 

[Dee Dah Dave]

In my country, if you move out before 30 you either have a very good job or you're getting married.

I get in America people move out from very young, but I never got the stigma against people who don't. There isn't anything wrong with that. Especially these days when its harder and harder to afford rent.

That's basically what it's like in the UK these days. House prices have sky rocketed and have basically pushed 'normal' people out of the market.

You need to be a couple or have a very good job to buy / rent anything of significance. Unless you want to live on an absolute shoestring with probably a ton of debt.

I'm fortunate to have my own company and so it wasn't an issue for me. I still spend a fair bit of time 'at home' though, even when I have my own home.

There's nothing wrong with it whatsoever and I pity the people who pity others for doing so!

 

[RoadHazard]

This is quite different in different countries, obviously. Here in Sweden most people move out at around 20, or even a few years earlier. I was 22 when I moved out for real (before that I had been away studying for two years, and was only home for breaks). I wasn't in any terrible rush to get out, but it was great to get my own place. I'm now 31, and I absolutely could not go back. Doing so would be very difficult anyway, as my parents don't live in the same city as me.

 

[Vault Dweller 111]

i have never seen your name before or any of your posts, but as soon as you made that one post last page, i knew everything about you, because i have met a million people like you. fuck your life up, then use the ridiculously dumb english in asia get of jail card. i wont go on, you can look up my past posts on what i think of people who go teach in asia as their last resort. or dont. my point was you are the textbook example of everything i wrote the last few pages. if there wasnt a 'teach' in asia industry, think about where you'd be right now. probably living at home, working at walmart. which is the result of your mistakes in your studies, networking, and job hunting. i'm glad you did at least have the selfawareness to admit it in your first post. where's cosmicblizzard? see what i was talking about?

I pity you.

 

[TatteredHat]

I pity you.

You'd be wasting it.

 

[Mendrox]

I pity you.

He is not exactly wrong either, because exactly that is a current trend for many people.

 

[TyrantII]

i have never seen your name before or any of your posts, but as soon as you made that one post last page, i knew everything about you, because i have met a million people like you. fuck your life up, then use the ridiculously dumb english in asia get of jail card. i wont go on, you can look up my past posts on what i think of people who go teach in asia as their last resort. or dont. my point was you are the textbook example of everything i wrote the last few pages. if there wasnt a 'teach' in asia industry, think about where you'd be right now. probably living at home, working at walmart. which is the result of your mistakes in your studies, networking, and job hunting. i'm glad you did at least have the selfawareness to admit it in your first post. where's cosmicblizzard? see what i was talking about?

 

[NeonBlack]

i have never seen your name before or any of your posts, but as soon as you made that one post last page, i knew everything about you, because i have met a million people like you. fuck your life up, then use the ridiculously dumb english in asia get of jail card. i wont go on, you can look up my past posts on what i think of people who go teach in asia as their last resort. or dont. my point was you are the textbook example of everything i wrote the last few pages. if there wasnt a 'teach' in asia industry, think about where you'd be right now. probably living at home, working at walmart. which is the result of your mistakes in your studies, networking, and job hunting. i'm glad you did at least have the selfawareness to admit it in your first post. where's cosmicblizzard? see what i was talking about?

The words of a true expert.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

I see people are buying into fantasist ideals.

Are some of you projecting where you wish you were in life and finally have someone to give voice to your bitterness and resentment with life?

From a self ascribed 1% too. Lol. Tell me about your investments, I'm an expert. Tell me about your dividends, your projected returns for the year, what funds you're invested with, what your property portfolio looks like.

Tell me bro, let's swap tips and see if we can both make more money. Come on...don't leave me hanging.

 

[kewlmyc]

24 almost 25 and lived with my parents for all but 6 months of my life. I would love to live on my own, but I can't afford it due to debt.

 

[JB1981]

Around here, families in houses are often 3 generations deep. Whatever works, and I personally do not care if someone lives with their parents or not. Just like any other relationship, if they let their parents walk all over them like a doormat, it doesn't matter if you move out, their parents will still walk all over them like a doormat and the fact that they live outside the house is a mere formality.

I often find people that are concerned with the living situation of others are either insecure or put their nose in business that doesn't hurt them whatsoever.

It's not uncommon around here for people to marry and then they move into one of their parents' house.

India?

 

[Mendrox]

I see people are buying into fantasist ideals.

Are some of you projecting where you wish you were in life and finally have someone to give voice to your bitterness and resentment with life?

From a self ascribed 1% too. Lol. Tell me about your investments, I'm an expert. Tell me about your dividends, your projected returns for the year, what funds you're invested with, what your property portfolio looks like.

Tell me bro, let's swap tips and see if we can both make more money. Come on...don't leave me hanging.

It's not funny Miles. Let us talk about parenting again.

Also please ignore I am an expert or just live with him telling you that some of you are just losers because they make up excuses. He is not wrong. He is a douchbag that loves success and he seems to be more confident than some people in this thread in here so it doesn't surprise me that he is successful in his field.

He surely is one of the people that have learned or just knew to shut up if the successful people talk, do everything they can to go up, learned to do the shit that he got told, took everything opportunity to generate more contacts by networking.

He is just not wrong and tells everybody directly how easy it can be for some people and his fucking message is "Do fucking shit, keep doing it, but always on the next level and use everything that you get offered for free". As bad as that sounds it really is easy as that if you are also able to "talk" with people.

 

[Foffy]

i have never seen your name before or any of your posts, but as soon as you made that one post last page, i knew everything about you, because i have met a million people like you. fuck your life up, then use the ridiculously dumb english in asia get of jail card. i wont go on, you can look up my past posts on what i think of people who go teach in asia as their last resort. or dont. my point was you are the textbook example of everything i wrote the last few pages. if there wasnt a 'teach' in asia industry, think about where you'd be right now. probably living at home, working at walmart. which is the result of your mistakes in your studies, networking, and job hunting. i'm glad you did at least have the selfawareness to admit it in your first post. where's cosmicblizzard? see what i was talking about?

You are painfully arrogant.

Are you a sociopath? Genuine question.

 

[EazyWeazy3]

I live in the Bay Area.

I can't afford to live on my own.

 

[Tevious]

i have never seen your name before or any of your posts, but as soon as you made that one post last page, i knew everything about you, because i have met a million people like you. fuck your life up, then use the ridiculously dumb english in asia get of jail card. i wont go on, you can look up my past posts on what i think of people who go teach in asia as their last resort. or dont. my point was you are the textbook example of everything i wrote the last few pages. if there wasnt a 'teach' in asia industry, think about where you'd be right now. probably living at home, working at walmart. which is the result of your mistakes in your studies, networking, and job hunting. i'm glad you did at least have the selfawareness to admit it in your first post. where's cosmicblizzard? see what i was talking about?

Am I? Actually, my job before Korea was with Pepsi. I was part time because I was working for them when I went to university. I could be making pretty decent money with them working full time hours, but I wouldn't have a life working up to 60 hours a week doing the exact same shit day in and day out. Money isn't everything for me. I went to Korea in the first place because I had a friend here and I just wanted the opportunity to travel.

 

[Omikaru]

UK here. 28, living with my mother rent free. Left home for four years for uni, but I always returned home. Planning to move in with my girlfriend eventually, but we decided it'd make more sense to save for a large flat deposit and pay a small monthly mortgage rather than rush to live together and pay off some greedy landlord's mortgage on their umpteenth buy-to-let property. Our rationale is twofold: firstly with a large deposit the monthly mortgage repayments are far cheaper than rent (and we plan to use the savings to hoard more cash and have a better quality of life), and secondly getting on the housing ladder is key.

Considering my circumstances, the amount I'm able to save, the hours I work (20 hours per week), and the disposable income I get from that job, I consider myself extremely lucky in the current climate. That said, even I don't have it as good as my parents did.

 

[Vault Dweller 111]

Am I? Actually, my job before Korea was with Pepsi. I was part time because I was working for them when I went to university. I could be making pretty decent money with them working full time hours, but I wouldn't have a life working up to 60 hours a week doing the exact same shit day in and day out. Money isn't everything for me. I went to Korea in the first place because I had a friend here and I just wanted the opportunity to travel.

No. He knows everything about your life, he's an expert. Don't question him.

 

[Foffy]

Am I? Actually, my job before Korea was with Pepsi. I was part time because I was working for them when I went to university. I could be making pretty decent money with them working full time hours, but I wouldn't have a life working up to 60 hours a week doing the exact same shit day in and day out. Money isn't everything for me. I went to Korea in the first place because I had a friend here and I just wanted the opportunity to travel.

"Should have known better, because now you fucked up at life."

Expect something of the kind as a retort.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

It's not funny Miles. Let us talk about parenting again.

Also please ignore I am an expert or just live with him telling you that some of you are just losers because they make up excuses. He is not wrong. He is a douchbag that loves success and he seems to be more confident than some people in this thread in here so it doesn't surprise me that he is successful in his field.

He surely is one of the people that have learned or just knew to shut up if the successful people talk, do everything they can to go up, learned to do the shit that he got told, took everything opportunity to generate more contacts by networking.

He is just not wrong and tells everybody directly how easy it can be for some people and his fucking message is "Do fucking shit, keep doing it, but always on the next level and use everything that you get offered for free". As bad as that sounds it really is easy as that if you are also able to "talk" with people.

Whose joking?

If I came in here and said half the shit he has, I'd expect people to call me out and I'd have to back it up.

I didn't come in here and shout about my successes and then go on to put others down or mock their life choices, because I'm not a cunt and that would be a cunt thing to do. I know my success came from the advantages I had growing up. The connections and relationships that wouldn't be available to just anyone. That's the atark reality of how to attain the success I'm an expert is blowing hot air about, why pretend this isn't true?

So we can keep it real? Real fucking dumb with a bullshitter leading the charge.

 

[Symphonia]

I didn't come in here and shout about my successes and then go on to put others down or mock their life choices, because I'm not a cunt and that would be a cunt thing to do.

Sorry, but all you did yesterday was put people down for making their life choices. Now I'm not going to go ahead and call you a cunt, because I'm not a cunt and that would be a cunt thing to do, but are you admitting you're a cunt?

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Sorry, but all you did yesterday was put people down for making their life choices. Now I'm not going to go ahead and call you a cunt, because I'm not a cunt and that would be a cunt thing to do, but are you admitting you're a cunt?

Getting pregnant by accident when you're in a relationship isn't a life choice.

Don't be stupid.

 

[Mendrox]

Whose joking?

If I came in here and said half the shit he has, I'd expect people to call me out and I'd have to back it up.

I didn't come in here and shout about my successes and then go on to put others down or mock their life choices, because I'm not a cunt and that would be a cunt thing to do. I know my success came from the advantages I had growing up. The connections and relationships that wouldn't be available to just anyone. That's the atark reality of how to attain the success I'm an expert is blowing hot air about, why pretend this isn't true?

So we can keep it real? Real fucking dumb with a bullshitter leading the charge.

Please read your own past posts. Also he had the same opportunities like everyone else in his area. I mean networking is one the simplest thing and everybody should do this today. If you are thinking that it is not worth it to get into successful/higher people asses, then it is your own fault when you are complaining that you have no money for anything.

I really should stop discussing with you.

As you can see by his tag, he is a very direct person, but he is not wrong and just because some people in here feel attacked by him, doesn't mean he is wrong either. He surely sits behind his display and laughs at all people that complain that they cannot do shit - it is just not true (except for the ill people or unlucky people, but persistens helps with this).

Getting pregnant by accident when you're in a relationship isn't a life choice.

Don't be stupid.

Holy shit you really are Miles Quaritch from Avatar.

 

[Symphonia]

Getting pregnant by accident when you're in a relationship isn't a life choice.

Don't be stupid.

Choosing to keep a baby is.

 

[Koriandrr]

Please read your own past posts. Also he had the same opportunities like everyone else in his area. I mean networking is one the simplest thing and everybody should do this today. If you are thinking that it is not worth it to get into successful/higher people asses, then it is your own fault when you are complaining that you have no money for anything.

So very true. Words of wisdom.

I'm just starting out in my field and I just sent out a million messages on LinkedIn, managed to arrange a meeting with a massive CEO of a world leading company (no names), but it's the kind of person you'd think you gotta be a multi-millionaire to talk to, but you really don't. He'd talk to anyone simply because you asked. No one is less worthy than anyone else, if you want something just ask for it. The fact you didn't and someone else did is your own fault.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Choosing to keep a baby is.

Did I say people were stupid for keeping the baby or for not using contraception?