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[GameplayWhore]

Some girls are bigger than others.

Smaller ones are always a big shock. I think I've had three instances of mild internal panic thinking "aw, crap, what happens if I can't get in??!?".

Spoiler

not a stealth brag, I'm just normal in that regard, but I think smaller girls seem more likely to head in my direction for some reason

Balls, I have to leave work. This thread is really fun and I'm probably going to miss like the next ten pages. D:

 

[Count Dookkake]

It's a cabinet. In the bathroom.

/creeper

Uh since I can't help myself, another question, what's something that made you go flaccid on the spot during sex or a blowjob? Or has it even happened?

Poor performance.

Boredom.

 

[clearacell]

Women don't really need that much advice since they are the pursued...it's the pursuer that needs the advice (men)

 

[leadbelly]

Anymore questions? I'm here all night.

 

[Mineshaft_Gap]

If you've ever been sent naked pictures from your girlfriend and she asked you to delete them right after... did you delete them?

 

[SmokyDave]

Uh since I can't help myself, another question, what's something that made you go flaccid on the spot during sex or a blowjob? Or has it even happened?

1; Being excessively drunk / stoned (happened more than once)

2; Performance anxiety with someone ridiculously attractive.

3; Being reminded mid-coitus that I was cheating on someone.

And once when I received a handjob from someone using a perfumed oil that disagreed with my chap. It went flaccid as I ran through her hallway looking for icy water.

If you've ever been sent naked pictures from your girlfriend and she asked you to delete them right after... did you delete them?

Nope. Don't send 'em if you don't want them archiving. We never delete them unless we are cheating on someone.

 

[Devolution]

Women don't really need that much advice since they are the pursued...it's the pursuer that needs the advice (men)

Hey, shut up, I'm having fun and learning here.

 

[Anton Sugar]

Boredom.

Boredom, on her or my part.

Teeth always do the job, too.

 

[JudgeN]

Dave Chapelle already got this covered, there are only 4 things women need to do keep a man happy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7be-E7_Xb_s

This should really be in the OP.

 

[grumble]

I have male friends that feel threatened by women that masturbate or happily profess to owning toys but you're really not missing much if you miss those guys out.

I feel the same about women that would take issue with their boyfriends masturbating.

Well I could see some threatening feeling if the girl owns fairly hardcore toys. I'd be a little concerned that relatively vanilla sex wouldn't 'do it' for her, because of desensitization and her just being used to very intense sensations.

 

[SmokyDave]

When a girl farts when you go down on them.

Pure sulphur. Doesn't kill my boner but, my god, it can make you heave.

Well I could see some threatening feeling if the girl owns fairly hardcore toys. I'd be a little concerned that relatively vanilla sex wouldn't 'do it' for her, because of desensitization and her just being used to very intense sensations.

Certainly, it seems to me that prolonged use of the Ann Summers Rampant Rabbit reduces clitoral sensitivity (more than older 'vibrating shaft' designs did), but you've just got to work harder. Get jaw muscles like a hyena and defeat that rabbit.

 

[GameplayWhore]

Uh since I can't help myself, another question, what's something that made you go flaccid on the spot during sex or a blowjob? Or has it even happened?

When a girl isn't doing much. Sometimes girls need to go a bit trancey, focusing on getting to orgasm. It's still sexy that you know that they're enjoying it, but every now and then we need a visual or audible reminder of some sort to remind us that we're kind of hot and not just useful appliances for the moment.

Also, not getting any guidance ever. It doesn't lead to softness, but it is a little annoying when we don't get to learn a girl's individual and unique wants. Despite what the movies say, we do like hints beyond "just drill me hard for the next forty-two minutes please".


Edit: After hiking for forty-five miles over two or three days in Reno and San Francisco, during the third time in a row (with a sleep cycle between two of them), this happened to me legit. I kinda felt bad about it, but I can accept that I'm not a well-oiled mechanical man.

Editedit:

And once when I received a handjob from someone using a perfumed oil that disagreed with my chap. It went flaccid as I ran through her hallway looking for icy water.

That reminds me: Never masturbate using menthol-based cream as a lubricant. It feels good for about thirty seconds. Then the universe collapses to a very tiny point for a subjective eternity.

 

[computers putin']

If you've ever been sent naked pictures from your girlfriend and she asked you to delete them right after... did you delete them?

Yes

 

[Sickboy007]

3; Being reminded mid-coitus that I was cheating on someone.

Who the hell does that?

To answer the question, alcohol, badly fitting condoms, boredom.

Has anyone else ever faked an orgasm? That's got to be my lowest point.

 

[Mineshaft_Gap]

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

 

[FallingEdge]

I want my woman to enjoy it just as much as I do. It really is a 50/50 split. If she isn't into it, then neither am I. I dunno, I'm weird like that.

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

I'm whatever about it. Doesn't matter to me.

 

[shadyspace]

Has anyone else ever faked an orgasm? That's got to be my lowest point.

Yep.

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

No. I've had girls be proud of coaxing a particularly big one, though.

 

[computers putin']

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

Oh hell Yes.

 

[iamblades]

How do you feel about a finger up the ass when getting a blowjob?

To be honest?

Depends on the woman's fingernail length. If they are closely trimmed I'd be ok with it.

 

[akira28]

Proper use of teeth through a condom can be some expert level ish, especially when mixed with different sensations of soft and smooth friction.


Talking about non-sexual stuff, or just non-sexual, mundane thoughts going through the mind during sex can distract the attention and alter the mood as well.

 

[grumble]

Women don't really need that much advice since they are the pursued...it's the pursuer that needs the advice (men)

That's ridiculous. If women want information on how to be pursued by a guy they want pursuing them, how to rock a guy's world in bed and learn how guys think in relationships would probably not hurt anyone's ability to enter into and have a successful relationship with a guy.

Not to mention this thread could be used to talk about the male perspective on a million different issues that girls might be involved in. Not necessarily relationship stuff even.

 

[clearacell]

If you've ever been sent naked pictures from your girlfriend and she asked you to delete them right after... did you delete them?

I still have many homemade porn vid/pic of my ex g/fs on my hard drive, but not because I'm still into them anymore or want a revenge porn posting on a website...but because they're genuinely good vids/pics, and for the most part they are very tasteful.

 

[SmokyDave]

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

Neither, although I've never been anxious that I don't measure up, which makes me feel arrogant. Having said that, I've seen bigger than mine and I know my partners almost certainly have and that doesn't phase me either so maybe the important thing is being happy with what you've got. You only get one.

Edit: I misread the question and thought we were talking about willies. I think I cum too much, the wet patch spreads across most of the bed

 

[DY_nasty]

You guys are better than me. I don't have the patience, or the decency apparently, to fake an orgasm.

If you've ever been sent naked pictures from your girlfriend and she asked you to delete them right after... did you delete them?

Nope. I don't show off naked pics.

But I do keep them forever

 

[marrec]

Well I could see some threatening feeling if the girl owns fairly hardcore toys. I'd be a little concerned that relatively vanilla sex wouldn't 'do it' for her, because of desensitization and her just being used to very intense sensations.

Oh Jesus I'm boned.

In my experience you can't really make the comparison. I'm very successful with vanilla sex and 'hardcore' sex. I've never been worried about all the... toys that we order because the normal stuff is still pretty good.

Of course, this is only 4 years into the relationship... the graph could get fucked up soon.

But this thread isn't "Man-GAF talks about Man-GAF stuff" so:

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

Nope, never really thought of it. Sometimes it gets out of control though and you can't help but have a laugh afterwards.

How do you feel about a finger up the ass when getting a blowjob?

I'm the vanilla one in the relationship, so I don't like. Not one bit!

 

[SteveWinwood]

If you've ever been sent naked pictures from your girlfriend and she asked you to delete them right after... did you delete them?

Women, don't send nude pictures to anyone's phone. Ever.

 

[Always-honest]

If you've ever been sent naked pictures from your girlfriend and she asked you to delete them right after... did you delete them?

Don't ever do that. Think about your future kids.

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

haha, no not really. A large load can be funny though. Feels good....

 

[Count Dookkake]

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

Don't really care either way, but it is pretty funny when you have a monster load out of no where.

 

[GameplayWhore]

Has anyone else ever faked an orgasm? That's got to be my lowest point.

Most of the time I either fake or just stop and hope the girl has had enough, because my arms and legs want to collapse. It's getting easier to legitimately orgasm with a girl as I get older, though.

Spoiler

aargh, thread to fun to leave work!

 

[Sanky Panky]

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

Not self-conscious if it's not a lot, brag/evil laugh about it if it's a lot

 

[ShockingAlberto]

Oh Jesus I'm boned.

That doesn't sound vanilla at all!

 

[H.Protagonist]

I used to work in the industry, trying to get back in. Right now I just happen to work in the South Bay.

If you know where Konami is it, I'm in the same area.

Oh, cool. I know where their home base is. Not too far. You're not that creepy guy that looks up at the windows sometimes, are you...? O_O And, I'd be happy if you would suggest some of their finer work for me to listen to. My coworker says he has the mp3s, but just 2-3 of their best is fine.

 

[Devolution]

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

 

[leadbelly]

Is the size of your load something you're self conscious about or take pride in?

Not particularly self conscious of it as I would say it is a decent size, but I'm not sure I take pride in it. I don't have pictures of it on my mantelpiece and show visitors it when they come around.

 

[Mineshaft_Gap]

This feels weird because of real pic January. lolz

Alright. If I take your hands off of somewhere and put them somewhere else. Why is it that mid-sex you can't take a hint as to where your hands should go?

 

[marrec]

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

Besides the normal "You're so white!" stuff, one time a girl said she liked when I did an impression of Sean Connery, but only when I was naked... so I guess that counts?

 

[Zekes!]

How do you feel about a finger up the ass when getting a blowjob?

I enjoy it.

 

[shadyspace]

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

My ex used to tell me show was "in love" with my dick all the time. Like, probably more often than she said she was in love with me.

 

[Count Dookkake]

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

Not so weird anymore, but it was weird the first time a woman called me "Daddy" during sex.

I could hear the record scratch.

 

[SmokyDave]

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

"You've packed on the timber*, you look like your dad".

We hadn't fucked in about three years and that line was just weird.

*put on weight / muscle.

 

[Sanky Panky]

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

In how much detail would you like me to describe my penis to you?

They talk about the curvature... then they shut up in delight 2 minutes in

 

[leadbelly]

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

I keep myself fit and healthy.

 

[Always-honest]

Not particularly self conscious of it as I would say it is a decent size, but I'm not sure I take pride on it. I don't have pictures of it on my mantelpiece and show visitors it when they come around.

wait, load = penis?

 

[grumble]

Oh Jesus I'm boned.

In my experience you can't really make the comparison. I'm very successful with vanilla sex and 'hardcore' sex. I've never been worried about all the... toys that we order because the normal stuff is still pretty good.

Of course, this is only 4 years into the relationship... the graph could get fucked up soon.

I met a girl who used large, strong vibrators so extensively it became pretty much the only thing that could get her off. It's not that uncommon either from what I understand from self-reported statistics.

 

[computers putin']

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

Not about me, but the girlfriend of a friend of mine once said his ass/back looks like a hershey bar in front of me once. Truly disturbing to hear.

 

[TommyT]

Straight up, I get told that my penis looks like me. Heard it from 3 different women.

I have no fucking idea what it means. I look like a cock? Fair enough, I suppose

/hug

If a girl called my penis cute, I'd take it as an insult.

Na. Unless you're Rodney Carrington and you want a 'mean scary dick RAAAHHHH!!!!'

Some girls are bigger than others.

I know, and if she's using something that's out of my league... that means I'm in for using a few fingers and having the tongue do all the work .

 

[Anton Sugar]

What's the worst or weirdest thing a girl/woman ever said about your naked body and or dick?

My current girlfriend had, prior to me, slept with what would be considered a lot of dudes. Every one was circumsized, so she was fascinated by "me".

 

[akira28]

'your skin is glowing'

'your penis is perfect'.
/notastealthbrag
/yesiamagod

 

[leadbelly]

wait, load = penis?

I'm guessing. lol

Yeah my first thought was cum. My penis isn't small and I can quite easily shoot my load. I have both questions covered.

 

[bluemax]

Oh, cool. I know where their home base is. Not too far. You're not that creepy guy that looks up at the windows sometimes, are you...? O_O And, I'd be happy if you would suggest some of their finer work for me to listen to. My coworker says he has the mp3s, but just 2-3 of their best is fine.

Nah I've never actually been to the XSEED HQ, I didn't realize it was so close until I looked it up on Wikipedia earlier.

As for the Cure, I know a lot of girls like "Friday I'm in Love", "Boys Don't Cry" and "Just Like Heaven" are probably two you'll hear and recognize (assuming you ever watched any 80s movies). And of course you can't go wrong with Disintegration.

Do you have Spotify?