Princess Viola
Member
Because I'm afraid my step-dad will say no.
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Gay and Bisexual thread |OT2|Bears and Twinks and Otters. Oh My!
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Princess Viola
Member
Heh, I'm still desperately messaging him in the chat because the chat is set to sign you out automatically after 50 minutes of inactivity and it's been over an hour...I hope...
But this only confirms that everyone hates me and I should die.
I wish those pills had killed me.
But this only confirms that everyone hates me and I should die.
I wish those pills had killed me.
No point in varnishing the truth: you need to find a better way of coping with being alone, preferably facilitated by someone who has working experience with anxiety sufferers and the like. Don't stall, don't wait, get the ball rolling as soon as you can so that you're not at the mercy of panic and whim all the time.
Aiko, a couple points and suggestions for the future:
- Not everything that happens is about you. The fact that someone does not message you could be for any number of reasons, from him not having the means to get your message to him taking a nap to being in another tab to playing a game to watching a video to whatever. Do not read into it. Doing this will drive you nuts.
- No, you don't wish the pills had killed you. That's the depression talking. What you want is to get past this issue you are having with coming out to significant others, and so you are trying to talk to people to work through that and you are disappointed that someone you'd like to talk to is currently unavailable.
- When posting, it is usually a good idea to attempt to post differently than one would if one were talking in a chatroom. What I mean by this is that you could probably have combined six or so of your posts into one more extended post, rather than doing a sort of stream-of-consciousness style of making a new post every time you have a random stray thought cross your mind. Collect your thoughts, figure out what you want to say, and say it - and then don't post for awhile while you wait for people to respond to your post. You'll spam less.
- While you may want to share details of your life, and I don't discourage that completely, I would suggest not going into too great of detail. Posts stay in your history, and if you do end up lasting here for an extended period of time, you may not want to have posted about specific details of your life that you might find embarrassing later, whether about your behavior towards your boyfriend (that post which got you your ban) or other potentially embarrassing things.
Feel free to PM me if you have questions.
Addendum:
Botolf is right regarding your anxiety. You evidently have problems with it, and learning to cope is very important. And for what it's worth, I say this as someone who has struggled with anxiety and had a suicide attempt at around your age.
Princess Viola
Member
on second thought, this was a bad idea this post
You give the appearance of panic in your posts (content, style, and frequency give this impression), and this is what I, at least, mean when I talk about you seeming to have anxiety issues. And the difficulty to be alone does suggest that there might be something there. So I do think it is at least worth talking to a counselor if that is an option. Even if you don't think there's a problem, it could still prove unexpectedly beneficial.
If you have questions about a moderation, you can PM me or another moderator, though it is now very late and I am going to bed, so I will not respond to a PM until tomorrow.
Princess Viola
Member
Oh, no it's no problem. I just think I worded the post wrong is all.
Hey, I took the punishment calmly and fairly.
I mean, I've never been formally diagnosed with depression or bipolar disorder. But I have all the signs of it.
Hey, I took the punishment calmly and fairly.
I mean, I've never been formally diagnosed with depression or bipolar disorder. But I have all the signs of it.
Since when is rez a misfit?
D
Deleted member 30609
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Princess Viola
Member
I don't get it.
Jinfash
needs 2 extra inches
Since ya'll decided to gang up on him.
Princess Viola
Member
Oh.
Well, it's 5:00 am, and I'm still panicking so it's understandable that I can't understand some posts, I guess.
I also can't word posts right.
Phonomezer
Banned
Welcome back, Aiko Heiwa.
dragonlife
Member
Princess Viola
Member
Um, I've been back for a few days.
Welcome back, Aiko Heiwa.
Unless of course you haven't been here.
Phonomezer
Banned
I haven't been checking.
I've been busy pampering my garden, resoiling plants that are dying because they're covered with snail excretions.
Princess Viola
Member
Ah, okay!
You should post pictures.
dragonlife
Member
I didn't know you were into snail excretions. I feel like I've learned something important about you.
Your avatar makes sense now
...of the garden. Although talk about snail excretions would be an improvement in the conversation.
you're right i smear my face with feces
dragonlife
Member
We'll be covered in bug juice eventually, pal.
I'd like to delay having a snail facial for as long as possible.
Jinfash
needs 2 extra inches
I've never been serious.
dragonlife
Member
*whoosh*
Think ants and spiders.
Also, can you find the original render of your avatar for me?
I'd prefer not to ever think of spiders. I'm going to take Rez's post and swap out the avatars.*whoosh*
Think ants and spiders.
I'll hunt it down. The crop's
Princess Viola
Member
I have Saints Row 3. Played through it but my partner had already beaten the game and blasted through the main missions so I still have a bunch of stuff to do for achievements. Also, I've been meaning to get some of those missions done but Skyrim then Dota then Europa Universalis 3 drew all my time away.
I'm not any sort of therapist but I do have some simple advise.
-If you want to live with your mother, just say so. I understand feeling stressed out over things as everyone does. You are never going to get any sort of answer until you actually have the courage to ask. It can be something as simple as saying "Mom, I would like to live with you."
-There is absolutely no point in stressing over why someone is not answering you back. There are a multitude of reasons why a person can't reply to you. Most likely it is the simplest of things like in this case. The person you were trying to reach was sleeping since it was the middle of the night. You can't control when people message you back, let them come to you on their own terms.
-When you are stressing it doesn't help to make it worse by coming up with the worst solutions and then dwelling on them. It was the middle of the night when you probably won't be able to resolve anything. Take some deep breathes, enjoy a relaxing bath, go to sleep.
"Lord, grant me the strength to change the things I can, the courage to accept the things I can't, and the wisdom to know the difference."
excelforward
Member
Finally bought this and am obsessed. Also, relevant because of Skyrim, GayGAF, and awesome cosplay.
Back to the 1Q84 discussion: first off, the book does start slow. It gets much better, though it does return the dream-like voyeur-esque Murakami style. Sort of how you will be watching a characters every movements for days (sort of like in A Wild Sheep Chase where he is
stuck in the cabin on the mountain
Sebastian Stan playing gay?!?! Count me in!
MyAbsolution
Member
This might have been a question asked a million times in the past. So pardon me for asking since I'm new.
Do any of you put any stock in the "older brother" theory? The theory where a male's odds of being gay/bi are increased if they have an older brother (the more brothers, the larger the chance).
Most gay guys I've met all had an older brother. Only one did not. (I have one older brother)
EDIT: Not that I care one way or the other about a nature/nuture debate or WHY. I just am interested in the Science.
Do any of you put any stock in the "older brother" theory? The theory where a male's odds of being gay/bi are increased if they have an older brother (the more brothers, the larger the chance).
Most gay guys I've met all had an older brother. Only one did not. (I have one older brother)
EDIT: Not that I care one way or the other about a nature/nuture debate or WHY. I just am interested in the Science.
Necromanti
Member
I'm an only child. (On the nature side of things, having an old brother may indeed be a factor that increases the odds of the subsequent child being a homosexual, but it is obviously not the only deciding factor.)
I have an older brother. My cousin who is gay has an older brother. but I have a friend who is gay that is an only child. Maybe having an older brother increases the odds, but it certainly isn't the deciding factor.
P.S - I used to think you were cool. Then I saw you making fun of bagged milk in the New Canadian Money Melts thread. =(
It's not really a theory, per se. Data shows that for every subsequent son a mother has, his chances of being/turning out gay increase by roughly 33%. It's believed that this has to do with hormonal changes in the womb that become greater when she's carrying a boy, but girls don't seem to change anything. This is why you often see twins with one turning out gay and the other straight, despite presumably being "nurtured" the same way.
Hope that might have answered some of your questions. For what it's worth, most of the gay guys I know are firstborns, myself included. =)
I have a younger brother, so I guess between this and my superior handedness, I can firmly place myself in the genetic 1%.
I'm pretty sure Julia Roberts movies are what it did in for me though, so I'll take every study with a grain of salt until I read about the correlation between homosexuality and the number of times a person watched Notting Hill as a child.
I'm pretty sure Julia Roberts movies are what it did in for me though, so I'll take every study with a grain of salt until I read about the correlation between homosexuality and the number of times a person watched Notting Hill as a child.
my ex-ex was the oldest of 5 and very much an homosexual, with 3 sisters and then a younger brother, a happy straight married guy....
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