Of course they can, I'm just being realistic when I say that the more a woman is into her boyfriend/husband, the less she will talk to or feel the need to talk to any male friends, all the way down to not talking to them at all. I think it's the same way for guys too, except guys just like having women around lol
Dating-Age |OT3| Positivity, Confidence, and Not Being a "Nice" Guy
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Of course they can, I'm just being realistic when I say that the more a woman is into her boyfriend/husband, the less she will talk to or feel the need to talk to any male friends, all the way down to not talking to them at all. I think it's the same way for guys too, except guys just like having women around lol
There's a difference between a strong willed woman and an actual bitch though. My gf is pretty strong willed and would probably be considered a bitch by people who don't know her. Which is what I imagine you are describing. Saying that women who are defined (with good reason) as bitches are misunderstood is the same as saying guys who are defined as assholes are misunderstood. In most cases someone has done something to earn that moniker. There are a lot of times where they get thrown around for no reason, yes, but there are also times when the person has earned that title.
Also, as far as the term bitch goes, anyone who uses it in this thread should make sure that they are careful with how they use it. Calling a specific person a bitch is now a bannable offense for those who don't know.
Hypereides
Member
Thats pretty much the message I wanted to convey, in my short post.
EDIT: Hence the apostrophes.
My ex was absolutely a bitch lol. No two ways about it. I was fine with it to be honest, but in time it became exhausting. It really burned me out with all the negativity and control-aspect. Perhaps some people take for granted being with a "sweet girl". I suppose there's pros and con's to each personality.
Do you honestly think that women don't like having men around? Everyone likes attention. It makes you feel good about yourself. The way you made it sound in your original post you came off as someone who doesn't think that women should talk to other men at all. That they should only rely on you for a male friend. That was what triggered my dickish response.
thestopsign
Member
I've been texting with the girl from earlier and I sort of made fun of myself for asking her too late in the summer, but asked if she would want to hangout when I was back on break and she texted me back "I would like that 
".
".You are a sucker. Plain and simple. Sucker. You are a sucker in the first degree. A lot of girls cling onto a guy until they know for sure they have someone else in the bag. You're going to get dropped soon. Have fun though, YOLO. But in the mean time, you are no man to her, she doesn't see you as a person to respect. If a girl did any of that while I was with her I would have dumped her on the curb.
Liu Kang Baking A Pie
Member
The hard truth about most of the posts and situations presented in this thread is that a lot of you are wusses and lovefools that are just basically asking "how can I trap this woman into staying with me when she's clearly mentally checked out?" There are so many possessive dudes here who are scared of losing what they think they have.
It's fucking sad, and MVP is right about a lot of this, even if you don't agree with his choice of words or how he frames the situations. A woman that actually wants you and respects you will want and respect you exclusively without you having to trick her into it. If you feel someone pulling away or shopping for other options, fucking bail out and sack up for your next relationship.
It's fucking sad, and MVP is right about a lot of this, even if you don't agree with his choice of words or how he frames the situations. A woman that actually wants you and respects you will want and respect you exclusively without you having to trick her into it. If you feel someone pulling away or shopping for other options, fucking bail out and sack up for your next relationship.
Liu Kang Baking A Pie
Member
There is no way this is real. This is sad, and you're a sad person for staying with her.
What worth will a woman find in a man that will stick with her no matter what horrible things she does to him?
Hypereides
Member
Was just listening to this song... kind of thought of some posters when I listened to it. Seems quite adequate and relevant to this thread:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbevQH1B9ic
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbevQH1B9ic
Anastacio. I've been friends with enough young women to know that girls are masters at stringing a guy along. The moment she started showing attention to other men while on your time, you should have left. Refusing to leave a place before she got a random guys number? Bowing out of sex to speak to some dude who randomly called her? She doesn't give a fuck about you bro. You're being strung along until she can find someone else. And she's probably dating and fucking on the side to boot. Listen to Liu King Baking a Pie. Question yourself bro.
Edit: She's even on a dating site for Christ's sake. Dude, I'm going to give you advice that you won't, or are simply incapable of taking. Cut her out. Cut her out completely. If she texts you just say simply "Its over" and that's it. Don't cave. Don't answer her calls if there are any, don't answer texts. DO NOT EXPLAIN YOUR GRIEVANCES or email her or do anything of the sort. She will be with another guy within a week, but that's the sort of girl you are with. Dude, cut her out of your life. Everything she tells you will be a lie BTW. Remember, she's going to want to try to keep you, she's not ready to break up with you yet, its not on her terms. EVERYTHING SHE WILL SAY IS A LIE.
Hypereides
Member
I'd say the same. Its only a matter of time till she gives you the boot, crushes you and throws you away into a trash can.
Its a road leading to nowhere. Your clock is ticking yo.
Agreed.
Same shit here. The girl Im currently seeing keeps telling me "how guys are so easy", "lets them down easy" and "she hates it when they hit on her". Some random guys/doofuses often post on her facebook wall to get her attention, she often just flirts for the fun of it, being sarcastic and dominates the fuck out them. They get more than often frustrated and annoyed by it, ultimately giving up. I kinda get a kick out of it.
And on the oppesite side tells me by herself she thinks Im cool, always exciting to be with, complimenting me and she "loves me and hates me for it"./stealth brag
Liu Kang Baking A Pie
Member
This is my favorite post in the entire thread. The bolded part especially.Nah, she's by far not a fuck body. I feel connected and equal love while having sex, and we respect each others wishes and when we don't feel like it. I love just hugging her, sex is by no means the most important thing, spending time with her is. And I love when we are taking it easy and are just chilling, driving around, surprising each other with small things like flowers or candy or going to the cinema and we can be excited about stuff together. There's a whole lot of good things so much that I feel the love while writing this post, but there's just these bad experiences I have been through as well that I try to get over.
Mr. Saturn
Member
Are you agreeing with MVP or disagreeing? I'm just asking because, I definitely trust your opinion when it comes to women from the years I've lurked on gaf.
Anyway hopefully Anastacio will do the right thing, at least for his own self respect.
I figured you thought that. I think women are free to do whatever they want, just saying, if they like you they'll eventually just want YOUR friendship. Other guys will become distractions and they'll just stop talking to them naturally, except for maybe a few actual male friends. They'll just usually stop talking to the male "friends", the guys who like them and they count on for compliments, favors, attention, etc.
Yeah I like that my girl tells me all of the approaches she gets. It's pretty funny, yesterday someone called her Beyonce (besides being black and having a nice body, she looks nothing like Beyonce), and someone else told her that I better marry her after she told them she had a boyfriend.
I must have made it seem that my girls are actual bitches, but I just meant to say that they're perceived as bitches because they don't give guys the room to flirt or anything. They're gracious when complimented, but make it known ASAP that they are taken and don't need any more so-called "friends".
P.S. And no they don't fall for that stupid "Oh we can just be friends, your man doesn't let you have friends? Is he that insecure?" Lol try again buddy, my girlfriend's not a child.
He is right you know.
You really should take this advice. You will be glad you did in the long term. Being premptive about this will set you up to succeed in the long run way better than waiting till you hear you got cheated on, broken up with, treated all around like shit.
Buck up and handle this.
Doug Heffernan
Member
Anyone remember the show The Pickup Artist?
Last week, at a hookah bar, I saw a guy approach a group of women using the exact same lines from that TV show. Needless to say, it did not work out very well for him. Don't be that guy. ;] Funny thing is, the guy was a military type and the kind who looked like he would have no trouble at all picking up women yet he ruined his chances by using lame lines from a TV show.
Last week, at a hookah bar, I saw a guy approach a group of women using the exact same lines from that TV show. Needless to say, it did not work out very well for him. Don't be that guy. ;] Funny thing is, the guy was a military type and the kind who looked like he would have no trouble at all picking up women yet he ruined his chances by using lame lines from a TV show.
RedNalgene
Member
Agreed. How can your girlfriend defend the fact that she's still on a dating site? There have been many red flags here, but this one is the most obvious one. I use "girlfriend" very liberally here....
Count Dookkake
Member
Don't start that shit again, please.
Great, now I'm dealing with a rape victim as well. Not her fault obviously. Thoughts? I'm not looking for a relationship and I've never met her.
Kano on the Phone
Member
Wow. You poor thing.
Doug Heffernan
Member
...?
Mr. Saturn
Member
Heh, guess it was kind of a dumb question. Sometimes I'm bad at reading people's intentions on the internet.
Is there a MK convention in here today? :lol All I meant that I could find myself in a similar situation as that other guy a few pages back who might've found a rape victim. Combined with fake accounts and other stuff, it's just not my week
I like this girl, she's seems more than alright.We've already had very heated debates about that stuff in here very recently and it turned ugly.
The Antitype
Banned
Met up at lunch with a buddy who just broke up with his girl. Kind of a mutual split, but he thinks of himself as the dumpee, not the dumper.
Anyway, he was feeling like shit, cause he honestly saw a future with this girl as they had been together for quite awhile. He feels like he screwed up or lost out something great.
I made something up on the spot just to make him feel better, and it worked. Like, he texted me back hours later to tell me how much he thought about it. So, in case anybody here needs a pick-me up in a different set of words, here we go.
First time you saw her, all you wanted to do was talk to her. Goal 1.
After you talked to her some, you just wanted to kiss her. Just once would have made you feel great. Goal 2.
After you kissed, her, you wanted to kiss her again. Alot. Goal 3.
After that, you would have killed to have sex with her. At the time, if somebody told you that you could have sex with her, but you'd never talk to her again, you'd have taken that deal in a heartbeat. Goal 4.
Of course, you wanted to show her how great you could make her feel, and get her to ask for more. Goal 5.
Then, after having sex a few times, you started thinking about how great it would be to wake up beside her everyday and be her boyfriend. Goal 6.
Now, lately, you started thinking about what it would be like to be with her for the rest of your life.... ok, so you missed that one.
You accomplished 6 goals out of 7 with this chick. That's alot, and it was a fun ride while it lasted. But always remember it wasn't that long ago just goal ONE would have had you feeling satisfied, so think of how happy you should be with how far you got.
Anyway, he was feeling like shit, cause he honestly saw a future with this girl as they had been together for quite awhile. He feels like he screwed up or lost out something great.
I made something up on the spot just to make him feel better, and it worked. Like, he texted me back hours later to tell me how much he thought about it. So, in case anybody here needs a pick-me up in a different set of words, here we go.
First time you saw her, all you wanted to do was talk to her. Goal 1.
After you talked to her some, you just wanted to kiss her. Just once would have made you feel great. Goal 2.
After you kissed, her, you wanted to kiss her again. Alot. Goal 3.
After that, you would have killed to have sex with her. At the time, if somebody told you that you could have sex with her, but you'd never talk to her again, you'd have taken that deal in a heartbeat. Goal 4.
Of course, you wanted to show her how great you could make her feel, and get her to ask for more. Goal 5.
Then, after having sex a few times, you started thinking about how great it would be to wake up beside her everyday and be her boyfriend. Goal 6.
Now, lately, you started thinking about what it would be like to be with her for the rest of your life.... ok, so you missed that one.
You accomplished 6 goals out of 7 with this chick. That's alot, and it was a fun ride while it lasted. But always remember it wasn't that long ago just goal ONE would have had you feeling satisfied, so think of how happy you should be with how far you got.
HAHAHAHA, for some reason I laughed at this.
I dont think that would have helped me out in the early stages of the break up.
The Antitype
Banned
*shrugs*
Different people need to hear different things.
This guy was just focusing on what he lost, instead of focusing on what he had done. There's a difference.
Oh im not saying it was wrong to say. Just would not have helped me. Thats all.
It was good fo you to try and help out your budy.
Liu Kang Baking A Pie
Member
I like that technique. It's realistic and honest. We all get selfish and want more than we ever thought we could have once we get comfortable with someone. We start to take people for granted.
ClovingWestbrook
Banned
I am shocked you didn't ask him for his girlfriend's pictures so you can post them on NeoGAF.
Hypereides
Member
Alot of patience is probably your most viable option depending on how extreme her case is.
EDIT:
------
I got a personal story on this, and sadly Im gonna sound like an asshole... I used to date one. I wasnt aware of it at the time. We had the greatest, most passionate sex together. And she was widly in love with me. She told me once I was the best lover shes ever had.
So this one day Im sleep over at her place, we wake up and she wanders of to get some food from her kitchen... curiously I kinda take a tour through her dorm apartment. On her desk she has some documents lying in the open. I dont touch them but skim them. Turns out its a psychological analysis file from her psychatrist about the time when she got molested and raped when she was 12.
I was shocked. Honestly I got freaked out too, because I was a bit of a player back then. I knew if we lasted longer I'd do her more harm then good if she stayed with me. Over time I slowly broke it off with her, and never told her about what I knew. I felt alot of guilt and shame over seducing her. She didnt deserve it.
As selfish as it may sound, I kind of got scared by that fact.
ClovingWestbrook
Banned
What do you mean you're 'dealing with'?
If you are not looking for a relationship with her and don't know her, and don't seem you want to be dealing with her, why are you?
You're a self absorbed asshole (among other things) and if you can't see that for yourself then I suggest serious professional help. You need to take care of your issues before you enter into a relationship with another human being.
That's a fair question I suppose. I'm not *looking* for a relationship with anyone, if it happens it happens, but school is my top priority. We've been chatting and texting for a couple of weeks and she told me this tonight. I'm not gonna stop talking to her because of it, as it's been very enjoyable so far. Of course, I wouldn't have minded hooking up, but now I'm a bit more apprehensive. Maybe it was another one of those poor choice of words of mine
NeOak
Member
That's a fair question I suppose. I'm not *looking* for a relationship with anyone, if it happens it happens, but school is my top priority. We've been chatting and texting for a couple of weeks and she told me this tonight. I'm not gonna stop talking to her because of it, as it's been very enjoyable so far. Of course, I wouldn't have minded hooking up, but now I'm a bit more apprehensive. Maybe it was another one of those poor choice of words of mine
She trusts you enough to tell you that at least.
SlipperySlope
Banned
Somebody's girlfriend is on a dating site... And he still wants her? Dude.... Dude!!!
shanshan310
Member
Five years together, probably 2/3rds of my friends are male, including all of my 'best friends'. It probably makes a difference that my partner and I are friends with a lot of the same people, but not all of them. Should she stop being friends with her female friends as well because she has you as a 'friend and lover'? What if she was bi? Not all relationships between sexes have to be romantic in nature.
Yeah. She seems to be taking it surprisingly well, basically saying it wasn't that big of a deal. But she at the same time admits to having some mental issues to work through and feeling like crap after sex (though she felt that way before that happened too). She's selling herself a bit short I think. And in standard GAF fare, I tell her that looking for a boyfriend in that state isn't the greatest of ideas, which she agree with me on. Talk about opening up, but at the same time not building any attraction whatsoever :S
Tell her to lose weight so she won't feel so disgusting
Well after all that's been said in the past two days, me finding out she cheated and lied to me
Count Dookkake
Member
Tell her to go see a counselor. She earned that feeling.
It's not really your problem anymore, unless you want it to be.
It's not really your problem anymore, unless you want it to be.
She doesn't need to stop being friends with her female friends because they'll go shoe shopping and talk about stuff I have no interest in, but she let go of her male friends a long time ago, and she also talks to her female friends a lot less as well. She knows they all just wanted to have sex with her, and she's not immature enough to believe any new guys she meets want to be her "friend", so she doesn't waste their time or her own time.
Count Dookkake
Member
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