Is it just me or have people become less social?

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pgtl_10

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It's funny i want to become more social and ready to make a change into becoming more social. What I find however is that people's concept of a friend is essentially connecting on facebook.

People seem less social and spend less time talking to others. It's like the time I want to finally want to make changes to my life, the rest of society is going the opposite direction. What gives?
 
It's funny i want to become more social and ready to make a change into becoming more social. What I find however is that people's concept of a friend is essentially connecting on facebook.

People seem less social and spend less time talking to others. It's like the time I want to finally want to make changes to my life, the rest of society is going the opposite direction. What gives?

What are you doing to try and be more social? Posting on GAF about it?
 
It's funny i want to become more social and ready to make a change into becoming more social. What I find however is that people's concept of a friend is essentially connecting on facebook.

People seem less social and spend less time talking to others. It's like the time I want to finally want to make changes to my life, the rest of society is going the opposite direction. What gives?

Today I had a physical encounter with a friend.
What did you do?
 
I'm in my 30s, married with 2 kids and as social as I can be. That means hanging with friends maybe once, twice a week at most, family the other nights. I still talk to and hang out with over 15 guys in 'the circle' at our age.

Maybe 25% less social than I was 10 years ago.
 
Nope joining clubs, going to groups, etc.. It's part of my plan in getting out there. I just noticed that people seem more less interested in developing friendships or even hanging out like they once did.
 
I've had the complete opposite experience with facebook over the last few years. It's how I've stayed social with most of my friends throughout various countries, from planning events to getting in touch with people to meet up. Also how I keep track of new faces and network in terms of personal and business life. It's just a giant digital rolodex (do people still know what this is?) that gives me ease of communication to people because I know others are usually checking it throughout the day. Twitter though I've never really understood or used.. just seems like a mass text of a facebook status update..
 
Today I had a physical encounter with a friend.
What did you do?

today is Monday I worked. That's what i did over the weekends. Went to club with friends, BBQ etc..

I'm merely saying I seem to think people want to communicate more online then in person these days. It's like i'm trying to the opposite of what society is doing.
 
today is Monday I worked. That's what i did over the weekends. Went to club with friends, BBQ etc..

I'm merely saying I seem to think people want to communicate more online then in person these days. It's like i'm trying to the opposite of what society is doing.

It's always been that way. It's not like Facebook and twitter have replaced anything. You can still go to coffee shops, bars, clubs, ect...and they are as packed as they've always been, filled with people to meet.
 

That's when people start to grow up and stop clubbing every weekend and generally start to figure out what they want to do for the rest of their lives. This also means a steady job, which in turn leads to a fairly steady social circle. So there's far less "socializing" in the sense of meeting new people at the clubs and parties and such.
 
Don't talk to people, stalk them on facebook.
Put headphones on as soon as you leave the classroom to listen to music.
Stay inside and socialize on forums.
Regard your fellow man on the street as a hostile stranger.
 
It's always been that way. It's not like Facebook and twitter have replaced anything. You can still go to coffee shops, bars, clubs, ect...and they are as packed as they've always been, filled with people to meet.

Sure I agree. Well except last weekend I didn't find many in the clubs. However, maybe its cultural difference. My high school was in Ramallah and practically everybody knew everybody else. It was more than hi every once in a while. When I returned to the States I have a few friends but I realize you could be good friends with one person one day and never hear from him/her again. It's weird.

I'm not the most social around. That's why I'm trying to get better at it. However I find the concept of friendship to e talking on facebook with people then actually going out with them which is weird.

Interestingly enough my two or three closest friends are either not on facebook or don't care about their accounts.
 
That's when people start to grow up and stop clubbing every weekend and generally start to figure out what they want to do for the rest of their lives. This also means a steady job, which in turn leads to a fairly steady social circle. So there's far less "socializing" in the sense of meeting new people at the clubs and parties and such.

great I'm late to the party:(
 
I think it's less about being "less" social and more about people simply changing how they choose to be social. Go to any number of facebook pages and you'll see people being "social". Posting on walls and commenting on photos etc etc. This is not "unsocial". It's just a different, simpler, (arguably) shittier way to socialize.

I have so many awkward encounters at work because people seemed to have forgotten how to talk to people. Myself included. I've always hated small talk and always go out of my way to avoid it and that's all I have at work these days so I just spend all day trying to exit conversations. I'm one of those people that will start walking away in the middle of a conversation to make it very clear I no longer want to speak to you. I often do this without even realizing it. I'll snap back into reality and suddenly be halfway across the room basically yelling toward someone.
 
Why such negativity towards a fairly mild OP? Social patterns are changing as a result of various factors, and it's worth some discussion.

It's always been that way. It's not like Facebook and twitter have replaced anything. You can still go to coffee shops, bars, clubs, ect...and they are as packed as they've always been, filled with people to meet.

Well, bars are naturally still very social, but I also spend quite a bit of time at coffee shops and can tell you that patrons are typically buried in their phones or devices, a noticeable shift from a decade ago. Even while standing in line for a moment it's all phones, completely unaware of surroundings.
 
great I'm late to the party:(

Sooooo throw your own party?

You can do what you want with your life.

Don't waste it, especially with something as easily fixed as socializing. I'll tell you the first mistake: posting on forums. That's like anti-social skill building.
 
I'm about as social as ever...you can you know, just talk to people yourself. Initiate it if people don't initiate on you.

actually I tend to be the one initiating all the time. I often feel as a person people take for granted. a good quiet person but not someone people think of as a person to hang out with. I often feel i'm overlooked and that I have to keep in contact before anybody bothers to respond.
 
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Well, bars are naturally still very social, but I also spend quite a bit of time at coffee shops and can tell you that patrons are typically buried in their phones or devices, a noticeable shift from a decade ago. Even while standing in line for a moment it's all phones, completely unaware of surroundings.

I really think it depends on where you go and what kind of atmosphere is being fostered there. I've been to coffee shops where everyone isn't about being lost in their devices but I've noticed this tends to happen more in the less busy and urban parts of places.
 
Sooooo throw your own party?

You can do what you want with your life.

Don't waste it, especially with something as easily fixed as socializing. I'll tell you the first mistake: posting on forums. That's like anti-social skill building.

Today is my first day in a long time that i actually post consistently on a forum. Most of the time I try to stay away from home even.
 
I go hang out with people probably 3 nights a week on average. Friday/Saturday and then a random day during the week. I'm reasonably introverted though, so that's more than enough for me.
 
It's funny i want to become more social and ready to make a change into becoming more social. What I find however is that people's concept of a friend is essentially connecting on facebook.

People seem less social and spend less time talking to others. It's like the time I want to finally want to make changes to my life, the rest of society is going the opposite direction. What gives?

you're going to the wrong places and doing the wrong things?

Infact, you yourself are equating social with a personal 1 on 1 connection, where as social is everything from volunteering, to exploring museums and galleries, social sport programs etc. If anything, the world is becoming more social.
 
Today is my first day in a long time that i actually post consistently on a forum. Most of the time I try to stay away from home even.

Then you already know that people aren't becoming less social if you're out that much.

Hell, all I do on the weekends is take my ipad, my stash/pipe, and wander around the dorms. Eventually you'll find SOME party to hang with if you're willing to share a bit.
 
It's funny i want to become more social and ready to make a change into becoming more social. What I find however is that people's concept of a friend is essentially connecting on facebook.

People seem less social and spend less time talking to others. It's like the time I want to finally want to make changes to my life, the rest of society is going the opposite direction. What gives?

It's part of why I don't do all the "social" networking bullcrap. Those sites just drive people away from forming real relationships with the people around them. People are generally more glued to their phone than the people eating at the restaurant sitting right beside them. It's funny that as someone who loves tech and spends so much time with computers I make an active effort to keep myself less connected than more. I'm sure there are some regions where this trend isn't true at all but it seems western culture has the worst of it.
 
Uh, it's easier than ever to be social, and I feel like everyone I know is more social than ever. It's possible to go out everyday if you want if you have a wide enough range of friends and a way to contact them by text or some online medium. I know some friends that do that, and I know I could too if I had the endurance for that sort of frequent socializing.


It's part of why I don't do all the "social" networking bullcrap. Those sites just drive people away from forming real relationships with the people around them. People are generally more glued to their phone than the people eating at the restaurant sitting right beside them. It's funny that as someone who loves tech and spends so much time with computers I make an active effort to keep myself less connected than more. I'm sure there are some regions where this trend isn't true at all but it seems western culture has the worst of it.
Every time I see something like this, I feel like it's the ranting of a person that isn't very social anyway and is just looking for something to blame for their own problems in making connections.
 
It's part of why I don't do all the "social" networking bullcrap. Those sites just drive people away from forming real relationships with the people around them. People are generally more glued to their phone than the people eating at the restaurant sitting right beside them. It's funny that as someone who loves tech and spends so much time with computers I make an active effort to keep myself less connected than more. I'm sure there are some regions where this trend isn't true at all but it seems western culture has the worst of it.

Speak for yourself, joining the reddit Vancouver group on Facebook is one of the best things I've done. One of the busiest summers I've ever had. If I wanted to I could go to an event every day of the week. As I write this I'm on the train back from a pub where we were celebrating the birthday of a person I met only months ago through social networking and she's having her actual party this Saturday.

I generally have to turn down events because social networks means I'm invited to too many things. For instance, 4 different groups of friends, I have 4 Halloween parties on October 28th.

I think you're doing it wrong.

Oh, and no one had their phons out.
 
it's just you. you should have done that shit in college like you were supposed to.

i'm 27 now and while i still make sure i see my friends, a lot of us live with our girlfriends and work full time jobs - and are petty tired of running around partying constantly.

some kids here blame facebook but when used correctly, social media only enhances your actual social network of bros you befriend, colleagues you work with and women you romance. it also helps you find out about a ton of interesting events going on in your area. the internet as a tool, imagine that?
 
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