Unfaithful GAF, tell me your story

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Yeah about five years into the relationship. Cheated on her with one of her classfriends from University. The other girl was in a two year relationship. Was going on for about 2 weeks when she found my cellphone. I broke up with her even though she wanted to give me a 2nd chance.

Anyway, my ex is now with my ex best friend. The girl whom i cheated her with and had a huge crush on is still together with her boyfriend she cheated with me on. We had that thing rolling a couple of months after i broke up with my gf.


And thats not even the most selfish thing ive done. All in all im a good guy to my friends etc. Just flawed. I still feel guilty about doing that to her she is a nice girl.


Edit: Fucking new page ..
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
im confused.. are you just promoting your thread, or are you suggesting we cross post?


and while cheating is never justified, miss me with the "worse thing you could do to another human being" nonsense. Id rather be cheated on in every relationship from now till the day i die, compared to being tortured or murdered.

it hurts for a while, you shrug and you move on.
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I think by "worse thing you can ever do to a person" most people mean "most hurtful thing you can do to your significant other outside of maiming/murdering them."

And I absolutely think that is the case with cheating. It's the lowest, most selfish kind of betrayal that anyone can commit within the context of a relationship.
 
ScOULaris said:
I think by "worse thing you can ever do to a person" most people mean "most hurtful thing you can do to your significant other outside of maiming/murdering them."

And I absolutely think that is the case with cheating. It's the lowest, most selfish kind of betrayal that anyone can commit within the context of a relationship.
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I would still argue verbal domestic abuse is far worse but ok, I see your point.
 
i only get in relationships if i'm 100% sure i want to be with this girl and i'm ready to stop having sex with other women. that's why of all the women i've been with, i've only "dated" 3 of them and i'm 3/3 for faithfulness.

always maintain and manage expectations - if i'm gonna bone a bunch of girls, i don't want one thinking she's the only one. it only causes problems and headaches - and then if you're in a cold streak and need to get laid, you can't even call those girls because you've burned all those bridges.

having said all that - i have slept with at least one married woman, and several girls with boyfriends. i don't see anything wrong with this, and i'm a little ashamed to say i rather like the feeling of taking another man's woman. it's a little morally questionable but whatever, i'm an asshole.
 
Only morally questionable thing I've done was looking at other girls whilst in a relationship. ONLY, never talked, let alone flirted or anything else in that vein. Truly I'm a wild one!
 
2006. Towards the end of a three year relationship (her and my first), C was starting to see someone else "as a friend." I began talking with someone that I went to high school with, albeit her being a couple of years younger, but I knew she liked me. Let's call her R. I don't know why I did it, maybe it was to feel wanted, maybe it was to somehow get revenge, whatever. We met at the wildlife reserve, where we talked and really got close.

This went on for some time, maybe 5 or so meetings, before we met back at the reserve. I don't know who pulled who in, but R and I kissed as the sun went down, and it was one that both tore at my heart and made me feel again. I don't know how else to describe it. At that point, I knew that it was over for C and I.

While C and I were in this thing, we did not have sex because she was not "ready," and I respected that. We did other things, but never penetration. Naturally, after a long period, I became a little sexually frustrated.
When R and I saw each other the time after the one above, I took her to the beach at night, where I let all of that frustration out on her. It was amazing, and I felt dead inside as I drove home. I stopped seeing R a week after that.

C and I ended things about a month later because she wanted to explore and didn't feel that we could get married, especially as young as we were. She called me a week later saying she found someone and that he was amazing in bed. I called R, but she changed her number.
 
Harpuia said:
Only morally questionable thing I've done was looking at other girls whilst in a relationship. ONLY, never talked, let alone flirted or anything else in that vein. Truly I'm a wild one!
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How exactly do you avoid any and all contact with 50% of the population..?
 
Back in high school I cheated on my girlfriend with her best friend.

I spent the next couple of months trying to convince my girlfriend to get back with me, to no avail. Then came a school trip and I convinced my then ex-girlfriend (another girl, yes) to break up with my best friend (I shit you not) to stay with me. And so she did.

Two or three hours later my girlfriend came into my room and "forgave me".

The next morning she found out about the other girl.

Fast forward to almost a decade later and I'm still good friends with everyone involved... Except for the chick who was my girlfriend, who I haven't talked to in four years, but for other reasons.

Those were the times.
 
I was dating a girl for 3 months and she was really pretty shitty to me the whole time. She didn't want to introduce me to any of her friends, and she hated having sex.

So I cheated on her. I didn't really feel bad either. Dumped her like a week later, anyway.
 
My HS sweetheart and I dated for about 14 months or something (this was...a decade ago). She split up with me because of reasons and then a friend hooked me up with another girl. Hit it of right away, she was great, blah blah blah and then ex-gf got jealous and started weaseling in on me.

She'd come over at night just to try and bang and I'd say no no no...but eventually I let her blow me and then it just went from there.

Broke it off with new g/f, got back with ex g/f, and then got cheated on like 40 times and we had a brutal break up like 3-4 months later. I regret breaking it off with the better chick. Bad idea.
 
Made out with a girl while in a relationship in high school. I felt bad so I broke up with her about a week later. Nothing special really.
 
ThoughtsOfSpeaking said:
I was young broke and living in what we call in the UK a homeless hostel. I don't know what you yanks would call it, but anyway, my only light, best friend and all that in between was supporting me. (not financially, just mentally). At times I hated her guts because she would never give up on me and just move on, but at the same time i felt i needed her. However, after a set of setbacks in her own life, she began to be increasing irratble, withdrawn and bad tempered. i tried to be there for her as she was me but it just decended into shouting matches and arguements. The main issue was that i had a real close female friend she didnt like and that I lived 20 miles away (a stones throw really, but I used to live practically on her doorstep)

I didnt feel stro0ng enough to end it, because i felt i needed her but I was drifiting away from her at the same time. Up pops a new girl in my hostel, who basically made it clear from day one she wanted me. We ended up doing the do and my girl found out. Not my finest hour.

But it gets worse.


instead of just dumping me, my girl (who at this point was kinda co-dependant on me too) stuck me in a weird situation. Basically she was free to do exactly what she pleased, but at the same time she was still seeing me and having sex with me, hanging the carrot of us getting back together over my head. meanwhile the new girl, who I had told over the phone to basically fuck off, to get back in my exes good books, still for whatever mad reason wanted me. as I was sorta single, i ended up seeing both of them for a few months, which culminated with them both getting pregnant for me within a week of each other. Call it good luck, bad luck karma or fate, they both lost the babies.


to this day neither of them know how far things went with the other girl after they initally found out about each other.

thats the last time i really cheated as such, although Ive had sex with other women, when ive been on "breaks" with other girls, but its been all above board - no sneaking around.
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You sound like a jerk and your sperm is weak.
 
Mully said:
Been cheated on twice and possibly a third time.

The first time I was in a silly relationship for 6-7 months my junior year of high school. The girl made out with a guy from her school at a party, I found out a few days later and I dumped her on the spot.

The second time I was in another silly HS relationship. We were going out for over a year. One night I got really drunk and just said "You don't know much about me and I don't know much about you." That was three months into the relationship. According to her, she got scared and started hooking up with random guys for the next 9 months while still dating me. My best friend knew for months but didn't tell me and I only found out because of a joke my teammate blurted out about her sleeping around during practice one day. I didn't even bother calling her. I just texted her, "We're done. Have a good life." She kept calling me for weeks. Each message was more desperate than the last.

I'm skeptical that my most recent ex-girlfriend cheated on me or courted some other guy for weeks just before she called it quits with me due to my depression at the time. It wasn't until recently that I thought of that happening, but it makes sense. Our relationship was falling apart. She was away at school, right next to a frat house that she partied at a lot. A lot of her FB photos prior to the breakup feature her with the same guy over and over again. It's all circumstantial and hearsay and I'm sure it will stay that way, but if I ever hear that my intuition was right, that will hurt the most.

I have to say that it hasn't changed me in any way. I'm not jealous. I don't keep tabs on where a person is going, what they're doing, who are they talking to. If they want to make it my business, it's up to them. They shouldn't feel obligated to tell me everything and if they really want to stay with a person, they'll make sure to be honest.
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Have to respect that. I was cheated on also, and now apart of me is constantly paranoid or on edge. Of course, maybe I just need a few years to pass.
 
ive never cheated while i was in a rship.

ive hooked up with girls who told me AFTER i hooked up that they were in a rship/married - i dont consider that cheating.
 
cheated on one of my earliest "girlfriends". Had sex with a girl during summer and ended up staying with her in her home for like a week. When I came back home I ended it (was thinking about it for a while now and things just werent going well, hence how this even happened) and found out she had been cheating on me for a while.

Eh
 
My stories once got me a "Dirtbag" tag...

Never again...

I do have quite a few on this subject that are pretty damn wild but I aint saying shiiiiiiit.
 
Cheated on my first girlfriend a few times.

Why? Cause I wanted some new pussy.
Did I feel bad about it? No.
Did I ever get caught? No.
Was it worth it? Yes, the new chick gave the best head EVER.
Would I do it again? Probably, who knows.
 
It's not really a cheating story but... lock your phone, seriously, if you have a smartphone that can lock with a passcode or a pattern, do it.

This girl I was talking to got access to my phone when I needed to go piss in the middle of class(bad idea) and found the text messages me and my female best friend send to each other, which are your usual bff texts and the occasional sexting(no pics just very dirty text messages) we engaged in. Needless to say she got disgusted and actually confronted my best friend about it and basically told her to lay off me.

Of course I had to side with my best friend of more than 3 years instead of some chick I met in class. A week after all that went down I found out that she had 2 other potential candidates other than me and was also still dating her HS sweetheart that's going to another college.

So for a TL;DR version: Lock your phone and if you have a female best friend who does almost everything with you but sex, let your potential candidates know just so you wouldn't get in trouble with both parties lol.
 
I was cheated on in my marriage. About 11 years in. I stuck with her because of some really messed up reasons. Still with her.

We're in therapy, both separate and some together.

It's been hard.
 
Hero said:
You sound like a jerk and your sperm is weak.
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How can we have an interesting thread if people like you are gonna limit the more interesting stories. You don't have to condone it, but really.

EDIT: And I just checked how Scoularis's thread started. Man, the best stories will be in Anonymous Confessions, won't they?
 
jongkookie said:
So for a TL;DR version: Lock your phone and if you have a female best friend who does almost everything with you but sex, let your potential candidates know just so you wouldn't get in trouble with both parties lol.
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you're solving the wrong problem
 
AlexMogil said:
I was cheated on in my marriage. About 11 years in. I stuck with her because of some really messed up reasons. Still with her.

We're in therapy, both separate and some together.

It's been hard.
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Wow. I am not sure whether to congratulate you for having the steel necessary to continue despite what happened or feel sorry for you due to that.

I don't know if I am able to stay with a person that cheated me in marriage. I had a girl cheated on me after around 3 years of relationship and it hurt like hell--can't imagine what it would feel like having that happening after an 11 years of marriage...
 
Risible said:
You sound like an outstanding person. "Two babies dead, is this good luck or bad luck, so hard to decide. Hmmmm....."
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I'm not exactly a pro-lifer, nor a fan of children.

I didn't cause the miscarriages, so outside of concerns for the females physical and mental health afterwards, do I care?

No.

besides, they both lost the child in the early stages. It would be much different if they were like 4,5 months gone.

Hero said:
You sound like a jerk and your sperm is weak.
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*yawn*

sound? I am a jerk. And I couldnt care less bout my sperm count. *shrugs*
 
Never cheated but...

Awhile ago one of my female friends got very drunk at a party and called me. I wound up picking her up and taking her to my place since it was closer, plus she lived with her parents and they were super strict (ie they probably would have kicked her out). Ive known this girl for awhile, I kind of consider her my little sister. She's very attractive but we've always had a pure friend relationship

She threw up in the tub and then fell asleep on my bed. I called my girlfriend and told her the situation; it was around midnight. My gf at the time didn't like my friend, mainly because she thought she was too flirty with guys including me. I asked her to come over but she didn't want to; she told me she trusted me, and told me to take care of my friend...

I slept on the couch; luckily my roommate wasn't home. She woke me up around 2am still drunk. She wanted me to fuck her, started crying, told me she wanted me to come to bed with her, etc. I will admit that we wound up kissing, but nothing else happened. I put her back in the bed and then I went back to the couch.

The next day she apologized and asked we did anything. I told her we only kissed; I wish I didn't tell her...but that's another story
 
Got this PMed to me:

I don't feel so good about admitting it, because I had a recent tough break-up for which I blamed her, but yeah, I cheated on my previous gf.

I made out with a girl at a The Strokes concert no less. I have to admit it, it was great. But I was in a 4+ years relationship at that point.

The worst part is that I kinda fell for that other girl, while keeping the relationship I was in. Of course, the relationship started degrading, even without she ever finding out. Because I stopped caring, stopped making plans. But the other girl didn't care much for me though, or at least she was very confused, as she sent very mixed signals.

Anyway, while this was going on I was in a destructive phase, and one night going out with a friend, I made out with yet another girl, for who I didn't care though.

Of course, all of this was eating me inside, and sometimes when I got drunk or something I would get emotional and tell my gf stupid things like "omg I have a terrible secret :(" or cry about if we ever split up. I cared for her, of course. But obviously not enough, at least at some point.

So anyway, after that episode was almost through and I had cleared the other girl out of my mind, and was sure I wanted to keep my relationship, I tried to come clean. Except I didn't. Well, I did for the most part, which was revealing that I had been having feelings for another girl... because I think that was really the unfair part. Lust is lust, love is love. But I didn't reveal that I had actually made out with her or anyone else.

She didn't receive the news well, as you'd expect. But more in a "well I don't know if I should stay would you, just because I'm not sure if you still love me or if eventually I'll have to compete with that girl". She was just afraid of losing me. But I let her rest assured that I loved her and no one else. And we went through.

But some months later, we had a rough phase and broke up. I tried to get back to her but she wouldn't take me anymore. And I'm sure that episode had a great weight into that decision. The truth is a bit more complicated than that, as she started talking with another guy, who she now dates, before we broke up. But still what happened before contributed to that as well. Because I understand that if you feel like a second choice, and not loved as much as you love someone, you probably will try to find love somewhere else, consciously or unconsciously.

The moral of the story is, don't cheat. If you ever do, man up right away, tell and break up... or if you really really really still love her (and you have to think about it quite deeply) and it was an honest mistake, forget about it, don't ever EVER tell her or anyone and don't do that shit ever again.
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JokerOfSpades said:
How can we have an interesting thread if people like you are gonna limit the more interesting stories. You don't have to condone it, but really.

EDIT: And I just checked how Scoularis's thread started. Man, the best stories will be in Anonymous Confessions, won't they?
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I'm not limiting his story, just telling him how I felt. If you think posting a story in a thread that's probably not going to paint you in a positive light isn't going to get you positive feedback then maybe people shouldn't post.
 
Hero said:
I'm not limiting his story, just telling him how I felt. If you think posting a story in a thread that's probably not going to paint you in a positive light isn't going to get you positive feedback then maybe people shouldn't post.
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don't worry about it. I don't require internet validation.

Ive done plenty of fucked up things in my past relationships, and in some ways im paying for it in my present. Still, everything happens for a reason and I feel ive learnt alot from my experiences. I don't mind sharing, negative or not.
 
Can't we all just be friends?

I want this to be judgment free zone... we have all done shit that we aint happy or proud about.
 
Man, this thread really emphasises how special it is to have someone who you know you love and you know loves you.

I'm in a long distance relationship at the moment, I'm just starting my PhD, and she is starting work in the private sector. I miss her so much.

I've never cheated on anyone, but I think if anyone ever cheated on me then it'd be over immediately - likewise the other way round.

I think there's a lot to be said for knowing you have a clean conscience. I guess the main problem though is if one of the people in the relationship enforces a "Holier than thou" complex on the other.
 
In my current relationship I've been faithful. But the last 2? Nope. Last bf got cheated on with 2. And the one before that just 1. I get neglected, I go looking for attention. There are more details but considering how much ThoughtsOfSpeaking got drilled for, that's all I'm saying.
 
Never actually cheated anyone, but had two stories with girls who cheated their bf. I didn't really pushed them to...and one of them even told me she had already broke up before anything happened (that was not the case).

I must admit that I was gullible, and thought that them cheating was to have an actual relationship with me (whereas, in one case, it was for pure fuck-fun and the other was because she was, I believe, rather looking for an exit from her relationship, to break it with a bang).

From all the drama and fuss they both generated I know for SURE that cheating leads no-one to happiness (now, I consider cheating differently than breaking up to go with someone else, which CAN lead to great things).
 
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