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Gay and Bisexual thread |OT2|Bears and Twinks and Otters. Oh My!

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I am glad you two are BFFs again!
UBgSj.gif


And happy birthday to both Cosmic and Magnus <3
 
I got done working out and made a pizza. Sauce was something like:
5% lime juice
5% Heinz 57 (steak sauce)
10% salsa (sucked, needed more tomato)
15% Tabasco
65% red sauce

With onion and herb mrs. Dash, steak rub, Mediterranean seasoning and vegetarian bacon on top. My taste buds go into pregnant woman mode when I'm hungry. I was 90% done... and then I realized what I was eating. Fuuuuuuuck my life.
 
Happy burfday, Mister F!

I have a question: what's the proper etiquette for flirting and potentially hooking up with a friend's ex?
 
I have a question: what's the proper etiquette for flirting and potentially hooking up with a friend's ex?

Flirting is harmless, I wouldn't worry about that.

I haven't been in this situation but I would just check in with the friend on if there are any lingering feelings. You're not obligated to follow his wishes but it will give you an idea of who might be hurt and how much if some boundaries are crossed. The only way to make a somewhat objective decision would be to temporarily set aside your interests, which can be done it just calls for a certain amount of honesty. If you don't feel like you're sacrificing the greater good for something you want then you're probably fine. Being considerate doesn't mean never upsetting people, it's instead closer to an absence of selfishness, or considering other people's perspectives on even footing with your own so you can reach something like an objective 'good'. If you have any doubt at all, just hold off on it, since you can't really take back a decision and all it really calls for is self-discipline to keep from making a hasty decision.
 
If there's no hard feelings between the two and if your friend is not still hung up on his ex, then I don't see why not.

That guy is an ex for a reason, it didn't work. Doesn't mean it won't for you.

But then again, depends on how recent it is and how it ended.
 
Well, these two are better described as casual acquaintances, to be totally honest; previously, I would see them a couple times a year. They broke up in stages after a four year relationship, culminating now with a total cut-off of all communication between them. They both wanted to move on.

We started texting frequently this week after I ran into him on the way to work. I suggested we should hang out sometime, and exchanged numbers. Things went from friendly to flirty (and a little dirty) and now I'm definitely getting the impression he's interested in our dicks doing the hanging out, if y'know what I mean.

I'm not looking for a relationship with this guy and would/will be making that clear. He's very attractive (and has a sweet tooth, score!) but there are conflicting feelings about it nonetheless.

Hey guys in college/uni (or just graduated in the last few years), would you take my survey about social networking and education?

survey link

Done.
 
Thanks CosmicBus!

Again, depending on your relationship with the other people, be careful. IME, People look down on it, even when they aren't involved. Even when people say they're ok with it, they're often not. It comes up as a trust/loyalty issue. I've heard numerous times among friends (he slept with someone's ex...).

if you're just acquaintances or you don't mind things being uncomfortable, go for it.


it really sucks in Seattle, as I've got some friends who know and/or have dated a lot of people, and they're all off limits for me. Combined with other activities and I have a small dating pool.
 
it really sucks in Seattle, as I've got some friends who know and/or have dated a lot of people, and they're all off limits for me. Combined with other activities and I have a small dating pool.
That doesn't strike you as slightly unfair? Considering how few gay people there are, it just strikes me as strange to rule out an entire swathe of people and make your options even more narrow than they already are. Also, I took the survey. Good luck with whatever you're working on.
 
That doesn't strike you as slightly unfair? Considering how few gay people there are, it just strikes me as strange to rule out an entire swathe of people and make your options even more narrow than they already are. Also, I took the survey. Good luck with whatever you're working on.

Fair in what sense? The people I call friends are really important to me. I've seen these types of things cause problems for a lot of people and effectively end friendships.

It's not like my pool has been limited to 20 people ;)
 
Fair in what sense? The people I call friends are really important to me. I've seen these types of things cause problems for a lot of people and effectively end friendships.

It's not like my pool has been limited to 20 people ;)
I suppose I agree with Alcoori's points. It seems strange to me, but it's not a position I've ever been in, so I might think differently should it happen to me.
 
I suppose I agree with Alcoori's points. It seems strange to me, but it's not a position I've ever been in, so I might think differently should it happen to me.

I agree with him in theory, but it's a case-by-case kind of thing. I think attitudes on this sort of thing also change from group to city to area. I've found Seattle to be a bit strange in issues like this.

Cosmic's case seems super minor, and it probably wouldn't matter. I'm just saying be careful.
 
Well, these two are better described as casual acquaintances, to be totally honest; previously, I would see them a couple times a year. They broke up in stages after a four year relationship, culminating now with a total cut-off of all communication between them. They both wanted to move on.
They recently broke up?

We started texting frequently this week after I ran into him on the way to work. I suggested we should hang out sometime, and exchanged numbers. Things went from friendly to flirty (and a little dirty) and now I'm definitely getting the impression he's interested in our dicks doing the hanging out, if y'know what I mean.

I'm not looking for a relationship with this guy and would/will be making that clear. He's very attractive (and has a sweet tooth, score!) but there are conflicting feelings about it nonetheless.
So it wouldn't be a serious thing, and you're both okay with it? It would probably disappoint/anger your friend. If you're okay with that, then you can go with it.
 
I don't really understand why you wouldn't want anyone of your friends to go for your exes. The only case it would bother me is if I was still into them.

I mean, they are exes for a reason and if I'm not enjoying them, then as well someone else does.
 
I don't really understand why you wouldn't want anyone of your friends to go for your exes. The only case it would bother me is if I was still into them.

I mean, they are exes for a reason and if I'm not enjoying them, then as well someone else does.

If only everything was black/white.
 
So, I pushed myself out of the box a little bit this week. I recently installed Grindr since a good group of friends seem to meet some interesting folk through there. For the most part it's been a "u lookin" from several people followed quickly with a polite but firm "No thank you" from me.

However, I ended up chatting with a guy who, as it turns out, seems to be pretty awesome. The big step for this for me wasn't the talking (though, it was a step), but we actually met up for coffee. I'm naturally extroverted, but this was definitely a big step for me to meet someone from the internet, per se.

I know people meet up/hook up/etc. from Grindr on a regular basis, but it's something that's always kind of freaked me out a little bit. At any rate, it was a positive experience and I'm glad to finally have gone through it. I doubt this will ever be something I really do as a primary way to meet people, but it is nice to have another outlet than simply through my own limited social circles.
 
They recently broke up?

Not recently. They ended the relationship several months ago, but it took a while to separate their lives due to living circumstances and whatnot. They're 100% severed at this point

My main issue right now is whether or not to consult the other friend about his feelings on the matter. On the one hand, he was definitely the emotionally needier of the two and could potentially find this problematic; on the other hand, he always made it known that their sex life was very open. Third parties were involved in the bedroom activities occasionally, and they both took breaks to see other people at least once.

I feel like if anybody is going to identify with a straightforward desire to just get laid, it'd be this guy.

Who wants sloppy seconds anyways?

Never really understood this mentality, unless we're talking about, y'know, literally stepping in 20 minutes after the first person. Practically everyone you date is "sloppy seconds."
 
I hope all of you who live in the U.S. and are old enough plan to vote for Obama. He's done a great deal for LGBT equality.

Please get that vote out!
 
Where? I certainly don't see any. Though I'm not talking about the roided up Gears type characters where their muscles are bigger than my entire body. Maybe beefcake was the wrong choice of word.

lol, but that's almost exactly what I think of when I hear "beefcake". Lots of muscles.
 
I hope all of you who live in the U.S. and are old enough plan to vote for Obama. He's done a great deal for LGBT equality.

Please get that vote out!

Lol no he hasn't. It took him till this year to finally say he was in favor of gay marriage. The timing of it during an election year, to me, is highly suspect. If you want a real candidate for LGBT issues, vote 3rd party.

lol, but that's almost exactly what I think of when I hear "beefcake". Lots of muscles.

Like I said though, was probably a poor choice of words. I hate to use a porn star as an example of the type I'm talking about but I was thinking more like Cliff Jensen or Seth Gamble type body. You know, where they clearly have a fit, toned body but it's not so bad. I wanted to say Jock but that too feels like the wrong word. I like lean muscular but there's no word that I know of that best describes that.
 
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