I am on enough medicine and spend way too much on it all. I'm going broke, yo
Depression
- Thread starter Jea Song
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I am on enough medicine and spend way too much on it all. I'm going broke, yo
if it helps bagels i only went to the doctor this week because talking to you convinced me i should. was prescribed fluoxentine (but told there's no there's no therapists avaliable :/) and told to come back in a month for a check up. it was really easy and smooth. hopefully the pills help.
Charles Foster Kane
Rosebud
nm
Possibly? Classroom time is really odd. I never know how busy I'm going to be day to day.
Find me on Skype. If various unnamed people aren't lecturing me on Batman, asking for free healthcare after they slept on their arm wrong, telling me all about Canada, bumming me the hell out, talking about cheekbones, or ignoring my erudite analysis of the film "Titanic" (you all know who you are), I'm probably free. Unless there's more detailed news of Kate Middleton's vomit and/or breasts, in which case I'm obviously going to need to be free from distractions.
Collete
Member
I'm not the most helpful of people for you,but you're still free to PM me, Bagels.
Sounds like shit got worse for you.
Charles Foster Kane
Rosebud
Yeah that sucks. I've added you. I hope things get less crowded and annoying. Thanks.
Ok, so browsing through this thread got me thinking. I know that those internet-test-thingies are most likely total bs, but maybe I shouldn't ignore that my outcome was as bad as it was. The thing is I know that I'm mentally speaking not at my best at the moment. I'm listless, can't barely sleep at night, friends tell me that I'm agressive, my eating is out of control, I'm can't really stand anyone around me (though I don't show it), and my drinking (which I had under control) is starting to get worse again. I spend most of my days either mindlessly surfing or listening to music and sleeping/daydreaming. The only times I can pull myself reasonably together is when my husband comes home from work, which makes me dread weekends when he is home all the time, because I don't know I somehow feel pressured to be happy and active and what not and it is exhausting.
Thing is I know that maybe instead of writing whiny posts on neogaf I should seek professional help, but I had some sessions with a psychologist a couple of years back when my drinking habbit was really out of hand, and I'm sorry to say that it did not really see the use in it. Sure I drank less but just because the old bat had the attrocity to tell my that I should try to stop drinking for a week, but that she was sure I couldn't do it... I didn't drink for three months, just to prove that b**** wrong.
The second problem besides my previous experience is that I'm sure that I will not talk openly to any person about this face to face. I'm far to used to putting on my happy mask by now. So my question is this: Anyone here who had dealt with those kind of problems who was able to beat them alone? And if yes, how?
Thing is I know that maybe instead of writing whiny posts on neogaf I should seek professional help, but I had some sessions with a psychologist a couple of years back when my drinking habbit was really out of hand, and I'm sorry to say that it did not really see the use in it. Sure I drank less but just because the old bat had the attrocity to tell my that I should try to stop drinking for a week, but that she was sure I couldn't do it... I didn't drink for three months, just to prove that b**** wrong.
The second problem besides my previous experience is that I'm sure that I will not talk openly to any person about this face to face. I'm far to used to putting on my happy mask by now. So my question is this: Anyone here who had dealt with those kind of problems who was able to beat them alone? And if yes, how?
Collete
Member
As a person dealing with horrible MDD that as of late is going to push me off the cliff,you just can't deal with this alone. Please try again to get help. Not all psychologists are as shitty as you described. Keep searching and don't give up. Take your time talking to others, I wasn't keen on talking to someone when I went to my first therapist, it takes some time.Please just don't give up, if you have an opportunity to seek professional help, you are beyond privelleged.
do you guys have music that make you instantly feel better??
I don't know how or why but Toto's "Africa" puts me in a good mode, unlike many other songs I like but don't do it for me when I am feeling down.
I don't know how or why but Toto's "Africa" puts me in a good mode, unlike many other songs I like but don't do it for me when I am feeling down.
Charles Foster Kane
Rosebud
The Beatles have the power to both cheer me up or depress me.
These make me feel better.
here comes the sun
Let it be
I recommend anyone with depression to watch a movie called Nights of Cabiria. Such a great movie, It made me feel better. Please don't spoil it for yourselves.
No feel-good music, but Lester Young, Billie Holiday, Charlie Parker... have the power to make me feel good about being depressed.
No feel good music here, but I tend to use music as a coping mechanism for depression.
I know I should. I really do. I just don't see myself doing it. I can't even talk to my best friend about this though I know that she would be like the most supportive person ever and I'm also sure that she kind of suspects that I'm not all that well but every time the topic comes up start to play it down, makes stupid jokes or simply ignore it untill the topic changes.
Charles Foster Kane
Rosebud
Jazz is beautiful. Some music does have that power.
Absolutely. I live for jazz in all its flavours from bluesy swing which makes me feel melancholic in a very good way to hard bop which makes me want to dance.
Wow. I got into a fight with a girl friend on Saturday and I was pretty bummed out until yesterday when I started to feel better. I weighed myself and I've dropped about 5 pounds in 3 days.
Yeah, Hold On Be Strong by Tupac has a calming effect on me. When I was a youngin I'd fall asleep to his R U Still down? album playing through head phones on nights when I was extremely depressed.
Yeah, Hold On Be Strong by Tupac has a calming effect on me. When I was a youngin I'd fall asleep to his R U Still down? album playing through head phones on nights when I was extremely depressed.
Collete
Member
You guys might like this artist?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9xsoCki4pTk
It's like electric jazz I guess.
I know, it's not easy. I never thought in a million years I would be a depressed person going to therapy. But it is start to at least look for one. Go whenever you feel like you're ready, but at least start looking for a decent one.
Wait you start to play down the topic when it comes up, or you friend does? (got confused.)
Charles Foster Kane
Rosebud
Yeah feeling melancholic in a good way is unappreciated sometimes. It's really a great emotion. That bluesy feel is awesome. I'm don't know much about jazz and really have to pay more attention to it. My idol has always been Dylan. I love his raw voice in the early years. He does give me a similar feeling.
Music can have the opposite effect on me too. Songs that have a depressing feeling can make me feel sad almost instantly if I listen to them when I feel good.
Does coffee have an effect on any of you? A strong cup of coffee is almost like an instant anti depressant for me.
Does coffee have an effect on any of you? A strong cup of coffee is almost like an instant anti depressant for me.
Beat them alone? The success rate for some of these things (quitting drinking, say) is not mind-blowing even with optimal care (it's actually not bad, but relapse rates are still depressing) - if you really, really want to change things, you need to be motivated and willing to take steps to maximize your chances. If you can, find good professional help that will work WITH you and that you actually like.
I know the face to face thing is hard. I'm happy to chat with you on Skype about options and approaches, which has the benefit of you not having to see my face (which is also a huge drawback, as I am a beautiful, beautiful man - feel free to back me up ANYONE). I'm only a student, so it's by no means professional advice (maybe pretty solid minor league advice?), but it's something.
I appreciate the concern, Oomi et al., but I'm actually pretty okay. Possibly being busy some days beats knowing you're going to be run into the ground every day, at least.
Totally kidding about Skype being annoying. If I can't or don't want to talk to people, I just don't log on.
Collete
Member
If you say so.
Just remember I'm still around here as an illusive spirit.
Lol; all right. But I can understand if you do think it's annoying. It's understandable.
I do. I'm pretty sure if I would tell her even half of what I just wrote here she would drag my ass into therapy faster than I could say "I'm fine."
Collete
Member
Really? It makes my head throb and keeps me awake (assuming they make it right).
It has a pretty bad effect on me unfortunatly.
Are you even conscious of why you try to play down the topic?
the times i've seen a therapist it was suggested by my mother.
my dad is more of the "men shouldn't cry or talk about their problems type", heh..
Not really. It is just what I do as soon as people are around. "Me problems? Nah." I think that at some point in my life I had gotten so used to deal with my own problems on my own. So now I think I lost the ability of asking for let alone accepting help.
I don't want to brag, but I will anyway, because I actually do want to brag.
I wrote a textbook chapter on adenosine receptors (where caffeine acts) and neurological and psychiatric disorders. Adenosine receptors are implicated, through multiple lines of evidence, in both anxiety and depression. It's complicated because caffeine binds to two different adenosine receptors that have opposite effects. What is clear, from large epidemiological studies, is that coffee drinking (caffeinated only) is associated with lower depression. This is population level, so a cup of coffee may not make any one person feel better (you can be super sensitive and go straight into anxiety with one cup, for example) but, overall, coffee drinkers are less depressed.
I could have just said "yes," I guess, but I wanted to be able to say I literally wrote (part of, one of) the book(s) on coffee and depression.
I find coffee perks me up... Granted, being on the antidepressent has made me more susceptible to the effects of caffeine, but I really get perked up after I have a nice cup of coffee...
Collete
Member
Yup. Parents believe I have a behavioral probelm and acting spoilt in general. (Maybe.)
Pretty sad even after I confessed to them I had depression and my mother even saw my scars.
Ah well.
It's understandable if it's a group of people. I sure as heck don't admit my problems to others.
However I think best friends assuming you trust them, have a right to know about this.
If it's any condolences, I'm starting to lose the ability to ask for help as well. These days I'm starting to do things in silence without anyone knowing...
Still, you don't have to confess everything to your friend now. Building the courage to even admit you have a problems can be enough. The rest usually comes naturally, like releasing a giant dam.
You would want to hear of her problems as well if she was experiencing the same thing,right?
I asked out of curiosity. My parents never suggested to me that I go to therapy; I always suggested it myself. When I did mention to my father I was going therapy, he just sort of scoffed.
My grandfather always asked me growing up what would make me happy, but it was always hard to answer that question.
Collete
Member
Oh I see.
In that case, younger when I was in freshman year of high school, my brother "ratted" me out about my depression and we all went to group counseling. It was just horrible. The therapist thought I had behavioral problems and that was when the problems started about "leashing" my whole life.
Your grandfather sounds nice. I wonder if my grandparents cared about what made me happy or not.
Well first, I'm bipolar apparently. Long story short I was diagnosed as bipolar after a psychotic episode 6 years ago that was induced by marijuana use so I sometimes have my doubts.
With that said, I have read that a lot of people with bipolar disorder are more sensitive to caffeine than others and that definitely seems to be true with me. A couple cups of strong coffee gives me a euphoric like feeling but too much will cause me to get overly anxious with things that normally cause a little bit of anxiety and kind of jittery.
As a matter of fact I know all her problems every f***ing last one of them no matter how little or insignificant they are (I'm not saying they all are, she does have some mayor league problemes herself). Apparently I'm a great listener and give awesome advise. Doesn't seem to work on me though. But yeah gonna visit her next week maybe I will be able to muster up some courage and talk to her. Though I always think that and than I gladly let her ramble on for hours about her life and just give the occasional nood and encouragment or critic, whichever seems appropriate.
HahahahHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.
Oh noooooooooooooooooo. I hope I can do an interview with Bagel to show this is certainly not the case.
Collete
Member
Sorry I didn't mean to induce any horrible thoughts. I guess my inner jealousy was coming out.
You have the potential to tell her, I know you do.
If you do tell her, tell us. People on Depression GAF can use a nice piece of news here
I want to both laugh and cry.
"Is that why drinking a cup of coffee feels like holding hands with a lovely girl? I mean I love coffee, man. "
Having talked to Dice, I can assure all of you that there is very little that is normal about him.
Anytime you consistently do or don't do something it becomes a habit. If you do start opening up though, it does get easier and easier and you can develop a new habit of being more open. You can start with opening up just a little and then build from there.
You have the potential to tell her, I know you do.
If you do tell her, tell us. People on Depression GAF can use a nice piece of news here
What are you doing? Now my urge to make other feel better is practically forcing me to tell her
Serious though, that I'm even considering to talk with her about, well me for a change, makes me feel... well mostly terrified, but also a little bit better. Which leaves the big question of how to actually tell someone something like that. I'm pretty sure that once she askes me how everything is and I'll just go for the usual "Everything is fine" I'll keep on lying from there on as always. I mean where is the point at which you just open your mouth and say: "You know what I'm not fine, actually I'm pretty sure I'm far from it, but I just been lying to you for the last couple of years..."
Which by the way brings me to my biggest fear, namely she telling me to talk to my husband about it and that, well, is something I can't even think about without wanting to dig a whole and hide in it forever
Yeah I'm really not an open person... I could try to act open though, I'm good at acting...
Collete
Member
Here, take my red silk handkerchief!
What are you doing? Now my urge to make other feel better is practically forcing me to tell her
Serious though, that I'm even considering to talk with her about, well me for a change, makes me feel... well mostly terrified, but also a little bit better. Which leaves the big question of how to actually tell someone something like that. I'm pretty sure that once she askes me how everything is and I'll just go for the usual "Everything is fine" I'll keep on lying from there on as always. I mean where is the point at which you just open your mouth and say: "You know what I'm not fine, actually I'm pretty sure I'm far from it, but I just been lying to you for the last couple of years..."
Which by the way brings me to my biggest fear, namely she telling me to talk to my husband about it and that, well, is something I can't even think about without wanting to dig a whole and hide in it forever
That moment comes out when you're just tired of it all and just have to say the truth.
I don't know of any easy way to tell her about it, but what I can say is: this is your health we're talking about. This matters more than you realize.
My opinion I guess (take it with a grain of salt; I'm sure you can think of stuff better than me!) start by saying to her "Well, I actually haven't been ok" when she asks you how you have been. At that point once you say that to her, you can't lie your way out and you have to tell her at that point.
Explain to her why you can't talk to your husband about it as well.
OK. Thank you for the advice. I mean it is one thing to know this things and another to hear (or read) them from someone else. I'll try. I really will. Damn this is going to be hard. But I'm glad that I finally clicked on this thread. Regarding first steps and such you know...
Collete
Member
Ahahaha! Ahem. Sorry. Reading things like this makes me very happy. I tried to cut coffee out of my diet before because I tended to have it in expensive, sugary, fatty latte forms.
My SO recently got a moka pot stovetop espresso maker and it's fantastic. I can have quick, delicious, fresh, intense coffee whenever I need a pick-me-up. I've had a love/hate relationship with coffee over the years (used to work at a few major coffee chains) and it's nice to hear this habit isn't as destructive as some people make it out to be as long as it doesn't send one into anxiety spikes. :3
I found a place that sells coffee beans in flavours like chestnut, hazlenut, etc. and it has become a relaxing hobby almost- the smell, grinding it, preparing everything just right. Not saying everyone should jump on the coffee bangwagon but I found the ritual of it all became relaxing in itself. I live somewhere incredible cold/dreary in the winter so it's become a daily staple for perking up my mood.
Very interesting, but why does caffeine have very little effect on some people? I can drink 10+ cups of coffee in a day and not feel a lot of difference (about the same as the average person experiences after 2 cups). Can even sleep just fine after that many cups. It definitely doesn't keep me awake when I'm tired.
YoYo Switch
Banned
Major Depression: High
Dysthymia: Moderate
Bipolar Disorder: Extremely High
Cyclothymia: Very High
Seasonal Affective Disorder: Extremely High
Postpartum Depression: N/A
http://www.depressedtest.com/
wtf gaf..
Dysthymia: Moderate
Bipolar Disorder: Extremely High
Cyclothymia: Very High
Seasonal Affective Disorder: Extremely High
Postpartum Depression: N/A
http://www.depressedtest.com/
wtf gaf..
Agent Cooper
Member
Ever since we broke up, I cannot stop thinking about him and when I do my chest gets all tight and my stomach hurts.
He was terrible, he was a bad boyfriend, he had so many issues and he was just... dumb. But I miss him.
How do I stop this.
It's making this whole anxiety+depression thing worse.
He was terrible, he was a bad boyfriend, he had so many issues and he was just... dumb. But I miss him.
How do I stop this.
It's making this whole anxiety+depression thing worse.
Maybe try to depersonalize yourself from missing him. I'm willing to bet, if you're anything like me in the past, I attracted the "wrong kind of people" for me, they were bad for me but I had a very hard time letting go and moving on to better things because I am human and I could be lonely.
When I used to think about someone from my past who wasn't in my present for a good reason, I always saw it as where my mind went when I wanted some social interaction and felt really alone in the world. He is what you were used to so it's normal for that to be what your brain is fixated on after a break-up.
When I used to think about someone from my past who wasn't in my present for a good reason, I always saw it as where my mind went when I wanted some social interaction and felt really alone in the world. He is what you were used to so it's normal for that to be what your brain is fixated on after a break-up.
User 100115
Banned
I spent a few frustrating hours searching for puppies in my area. All the local shelters don't have puppies. I don't want to get an adult dog from a shelter because I have kids, and the risk of a dog not fitting in well with kids it wasn't raised around is too great in my eyes.
Yeah, I'm doing this rather soon, but my other dog, Badger, the cute half blind doxie, is lost because Whedon was his helper dog. He's depressed and whining a lot, barely eating...and it makes me even sadder because we had to put Whedon down and garrrrr.
I looked into getting like, a Newfoundland because they are gentle and amazing with kids and huge (there had been a TON of armed break ins in my stupid town and I am getting scared to be alone in the house, a big dog would at least scare some people away).
But holy crap those dogs are expensive. Seriously, people, I don't want a champion blood line. I want a pet that I am likely going to neuter. Grrr.
Yeah, I'm doing this rather soon, but my other dog, Badger, the cute half blind doxie, is lost because Whedon was his helper dog. He's depressed and whining a lot, barely eating...and it makes me even sadder because we had to put Whedon down and garrrrr.
I looked into getting like, a Newfoundland because they are gentle and amazing with kids and huge (there had been a TON of armed break ins in my stupid town and I am getting scared to be alone in the house, a big dog would at least scare some people away).
But holy crap those dogs are expensive. Seriously, people, I don't want a champion blood line. I want a pet that I am likely going to neuter. Grrr.
Yeah, fake it till you become it as a wise woman once said.
Other strategies you can use include:
Don't take it too seriously. Don't think I've got big news, I'm depressed, I have to tell you my life story, you have to help me!!! Think small, just fyi I've been feeling a bit down. Anways let's get some ice cream.
Say something like, "I haven't been sleeping so well." The other person will ask how come? and away you go.
Write a text message with some of the issues. Then make the decision to send it. Then when you meet it will be easy to talk about. You could even send a vague message like "I got some problems, but I find it hard to talk about them"
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