You're not supposed to exceed 1000mg at once, even less if you're drinking. If you're young, you probably dodged a bullet.
Dying of hepatic failure is an awful way to go. Be careful. It will not be quick and easy.
Depression
- Thread starter Jea Song
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You're not supposed to exceed 1000mg at once, even less if you're drinking. If you're young, you probably dodged a bullet.
Dying of hepatic failure is an awful way to go. Be careful. It will not be quick and easy.
I was going to call a doctor today to get help with my social anxiety and depression but I just couldn't do it. Been sitting with the phone in my hand for hours but I'm not able to dial the number and describe my problems.
I've had these problems for years and I have never told anyone about it and it just feels impossible. I hope I can find the courage to call tomorrow.
I feel so low right now
I've had these problems for years and I have never told anyone about it and it just feels impossible. I hope I can find the courage to call tomorrow.
I feel so low right now
Could I ask for some advice, please.....
We've got a couple of kids, the youngest is 6 ish months old.
1st birth was "normal" ish.
2nd not so great, emergency c-section etc.
All fine though, mother and baby no problems.
But it's really messed my wife up. She can't stop thinking about it, says she replays it every night before going to bed, can't stop thinking about it all, all the time.
It's making her hard to live with, to be honest. She's very angry / upset most of the time.
Last night she told me to leave the house because of some stupid argument about a nappy before breaking down into tears, again going back to the birth.
I know she's tired at the moment as baby doesn't sleep too well, but it's something deeper than this.
I'm crap at stuff like this, really crap. My view is, yes, it was shit and scary at the time, but everyone is fine, things could have been far worse.
I don't understand why she's like this, just can't get my head round it.
I've tried to get her to go to see her doctor and set that in motion. I've told her we can find some money to go to see a psychiatrist private. But she's flat out refusing. Her dad has struggled all his life with mental health issues, being on a cocktail of meds etc and she's determined not to go down that path.
I don't know what else to do, I know postnatal depression can last for a while and I know how serious it can be.
Help, please!
We've got a couple of kids, the youngest is 6 ish months old.
1st birth was "normal" ish.
2nd not so great, emergency c-section etc.
All fine though, mother and baby no problems.
But it's really messed my wife up. She can't stop thinking about it, says she replays it every night before going to bed, can't stop thinking about it all, all the time.
It's making her hard to live with, to be honest. She's very angry / upset most of the time.
Last night she told me to leave the house because of some stupid argument about a nappy before breaking down into tears, again going back to the birth.
I know she's tired at the moment as baby doesn't sleep too well, but it's something deeper than this.
I'm crap at stuff like this, really crap. My view is, yes, it was shit and scary at the time, but everyone is fine, things could have been far worse.
I don't understand why she's like this, just can't get my head round it.
I've tried to get her to go to see her doctor and set that in motion. I've told her we can find some money to go to see a psychiatrist private. But she's flat out refusing. Her dad has struggled all his life with mental health issues, being on a cocktail of meds etc and she's determined not to go down that path.
I don't know what else to do, I know postnatal depression can last for a while and I know how serious it can be.
Help, please!
Sorry to hear that you've been feeling that way. Here's some stuff to get you started:
1. If you have insurance, call 'em and see if they cover mental health. If they do, they'll probably have a website where there's a database of therapists that take that insurance in your area.
2. Talk to your GP about it and ask if they can refer you to a therapist.
3. Depending on what city you're in, there might be options for cheap sessions without insurance. This will usually be a center that can refer you to someone in the city. If you're in New York City, PM me and I can give you some info regarding this.
4. If you're in college, there should be a counseling center on campus. They typically don't see you long term, but they can refer you to other resources.
I hope everything works out for you and that this has been helpful.
Thank you. This is exactly what I needed.
I was going to call a doctor today to get help with my social anxiety and depression but I just couldn't do it. Been sitting with the phone in my hand for hours but I'm not able to dial the number and describe my problems.
I've had these problems for years and I have never told anyone about it and it just feels impossible. I hope I can find the courage to call tomorrow.
I feel so low right now
You'll feel great after doing it. Don't think. Just do it.
I called the doctor spoke to me and then said you've got serious problems. I'll talk to my supervisor and we'll get back to you. They recommended CBT and it's on a 6 month waiting list. I have no idea what to do until then. From what I understand in the UK these guys are therapists and can't prescribe medicine. My GP doesn't want to prescribe medicine and I have no idea how to get to a psychiatrist.
I don't understand why your GP wouldn't give you medication. When I approached my doctor about depression he immediately prescribed me AD's and referred me to a mental health assessment.
Did he give you a reason why he wouldn't give you medication? Did you ask him about prescribed drugs?
No. You would just be dead and that would be a damn shame. Stay positive brother.
Basically he told me it's an emotional problem and he doesn't believe medication would work. I said I would prefer meds and therapy and he just told me fill in this form and these guys will help you. My GP seemed like he just wanted to get rid of me and make me someone else's problem. From what I understand the people he referred me to are a therapy group and not actual psychiatrists so they can't prescribe meds along with the therapy. The therapy guys have a 6 month waiting list and I can't even imagine what kind of situation I'll be in by then, when everyday just feels empty and worthless to me. This is the only serious problem I've had with my health and it feels like the NHS just doesn't have the means to deal with it, reminds of those images where depression isn't treated like other illnesses by society.
I'm going to visit my GP again and see if I can be referred to an actual psychiatrist rather than therapy. If not I might start looking at private options though I have no idea how I can pay for that. Anyone in the UK got experience with getting help?
I'm going to visit my GP again and see if I can be referred to an actual psychiatrist rather than therapy. If not I might start looking at private options though I have no idea how I can pay for that. Anyone in the UK got experience with getting help?
revolverjgw
Member
Your problems are difficult but solvable, and doing that wouldn't solve anything. You'd just be walking away from them.
Living is my problem. Who wants to live in this body? I'm short fat and ugly. There are tons of good looking gay men that enjoy their lives yet I am cursed. Wish I never was born.
There is plenty of physically unattractive gay people, it doesn't mean they are lesser for it. If you were really attractive or had an attractive partner or whatever, it wouldn't make you a better person. I think you need to stop basing your self-esteem in comparison to how successful other people are. There will always be some one "better" off than you, in regards to whatever, just as there is someone always "worse" off. Even "well off" and " successful"people deal with anxiety with their own identity and circumstance.You need to become comfortable in just being.
As a gay man also I can understand the frustration with some of superficiality in the gay scene but it is not inclusive of everybody. There is plenty of gay people who share the same disdain for some of the trends in the mainstream gay scene.And if the value judgement of gay scene is getting you down, perhaps you shouldn't put so much credence on a scene that is based on superficial factors.
There is no purpose in life. I know nothing good will come from me living things will just get worse.
People who usually say stuff like this are already good looking
People who usually say stuff like this are already good looking
I have to get some things off my chest.
I was always hoping to be the best at everything related to school, and I often succeeded easily. Today I find myself studying something I don't want to, I was just there with a sole porpoise but I failed a it and now I think that I am just wasting my time a failing to be a good son.
And that is not the only thing that I am failing at, I have always been fat, but I have had many tries to stop it without getting to finish that goal.
Do you know what is worse? I am gay and my father is the most homophobe person you will ever meet. He is a bastard and I hate him for being how he is, but at the same time I feel guilty of my condition and I don't have anyone to come out to so no one to talk about this problem.
I am a looser and the worst person in the world, I hate living here but now I just see myself being stuck doing something I don't want to because of my multiple failures.
I don't want to kill myself just because I am not bold enough.
Sorry for writing this piece of shit, but I had to write it because I can't talk about this to anyone. :'(
I was always hoping to be the best at everything related to school, and I often succeeded easily. Today I find myself studying something I don't want to, I was just there with a sole porpoise but I failed a it and now I think that I am just wasting my time a failing to be a good son.
And that is not the only thing that I am failing at, I have always been fat, but I have had many tries to stop it without getting to finish that goal.
Do you know what is worse? I am gay and my father is the most homophobe person you will ever meet. He is a bastard and I hate him for being how he is, but at the same time I feel guilty of my condition and I don't have anyone to come out to so no one to talk about this problem.
I am a looser and the worst person in the world, I hate living here but now I just see myself being stuck doing something I don't want to because of my multiple failures.
I don't want to kill myself just because I am not bold enough.
Sorry for writing this piece of shit, but I had to write it because I can't talk about this to anyone. :'(
Hahaha, I am not physically attractive by any means. The difference is that I am not caught up in basing my self-esteem on something you can't really fix. Most of the people in the world are not exceptionally physically attractive anyway. Do you really believe that everyone in the world who isn't physically attractive should just die? And life is the entire spectrum of human experience. Positive, Negative, and all the banality in between. It is a blank slate; they may not be any purpose in life in of itself, but that doesn't mean you cannot construct your own purpose in life. It is not easy to overcome negative emotions when we are in a rut, and sometimes the circumstances in life are just plain shitty, but if you just focus on all the negativity and regress into a adolescent nihilism on the apparent "meaningless" of life than you are just being self-defeating. Try to divorce yourself from your anxieties and often you'll find whatever is causing you anguish is not really significant in the broader scheme of things.
Honestly, I'm feeling the same way right now. Thought about ending it a few hours ago. Now I just feel worse.
Prax
Member
Oh gosh, Fire Emblem is ruining my sleep and "productivity" even more. xD
Shout out to all of you who are playing in parallel to me (like Wilsongt)! Hope it's making you happily satisfied too!
"Less educated/intelligent" generally means "less options available", right? What else are you going to do if you have little options (having low interest in "higher level" avenues of enjoyment, hobbies, and productivity) except screw around? You can always "up your chances" by "lowering your standards/expose yourself to risk", but I feel like you're not desiring to do that, so.. that's the choice you make.
But I was never one to overthink the issue of needing to have sex. It just didn't seem very important to me and I always found it strange so many people were fixated on the whole losing virginity thing. But then again, I am Vietnamese and different priorities have been enculturated into me. It'll be different for everyone, but I wish people didn't sweat this stuff to the extent they appear to do in the media.
Waiting for answers is always anxiety-inducing, but at least you did your part. Focus on taking care of yourself in the meantime. Even little things like taking extra time with hygiene or tucking yourself into bed nicely will give yourself an extra feel of "I accomplished something extra today".
Hopefully seeing the doctor face-to-face will let those words flow out and your doctor will know how to engage you with more questions. The secretary might prompt questions from you anyway, in which case, you don't have to think of a speech and can just answer yes/no and pick a convenient time.
It is okay to not "win" at everything. Some things you can't change and you make the best of it you can and try to find happiness and peace with yourself in your own way. Same thing when it comes to parents. They go and figure it out for themselves too. lol You try to love and support one another if you can, but everyone also makes their own way in their own way. Can you join a support group in your area? Do you have a gay community online to vent to and get support from? Cool siblings?
I have some family that are kind of stuck in a similar situation as you. Homophobic family (well, the older part of it.. I don't think the children part of it care), homosexual and hasn't come out because they still live with them. It's difficult, but it doesn't make you bad, and definitely doesn't make you the worst. If you can do it and you're close to finishing your schooling, then try to finish it. You can always go into something else you want later. Focus on making the small accomplishments in front of you right now (do your homework lol, study a chapter, write a resume, etc.) and know that your path is not irreversible. You can always do something else. Try something new. You have a lot of time ahead of you to do all sorts of things.
I am going to get a haircut tomorrow. I have needed one for monnthhss.. Are any of you in need of one? If any of you decide to do the same, it would be like in parallel together with me and that'd be cool.
Hopefully you all can try to tuck yourselves in a little extra nicely tonight, because why not? Might as well! It's okay to be nice to yourself. Have a relaxing sleep, everyone.
Shout out to all of you who are playing in parallel to me (like Wilsongt)! Hope it's making you happily satisfied too!
Haha. I don't see the big deal. It makes sense.
"Less educated/intelligent" generally means "less options available", right? What else are you going to do if you have little options (having low interest in "higher level" avenues of enjoyment, hobbies, and productivity) except screw around? You can always "up your chances" by "lowering your standards/expose yourself to risk", but I feel like you're not desiring to do that, so.. that's the choice you make.
But I was never one to overthink the issue of needing to have sex. It just didn't seem very important to me and I always found it strange so many people were fixated on the whole losing virginity thing. But then again, I am Vietnamese and different priorities have been enculturated into me. It'll be different for everyone, but I wish people didn't sweat this stuff to the extent they appear to do in the media.
Hopefully you get a response soon. Maybe they are swamped from coming back from vacation. Have hope in their professionalism!
Waiting for answers is always anxiety-inducing, but at least you did your part. Focus on taking care of yourself in the meantime. Even little things like taking extra time with hygiene or tucking yourself into bed nicely will give yourself an extra feel of "I accomplished something extra today".
You can do this! If you have too much anxiety about calling and saying stuff over the phone, just call to set an appointment. "Hello, can I make an appointment with Dr. _____? When is the soonest he is free?"I was going to call a doctor today to get help with my social anxiety and depression but I just couldn't do it. Been sitting with the phone in my hand for hours but I'm not able to dial the number and describe my problems.
I've had these problems for years and I have never told anyone about it and it just feels impossible. I hope I can find the courage to call tomorrow.
I feel so low right now
Hopefully seeing the doctor face-to-face will let those words flow out and your doctor will know how to engage you with more questions. The secretary might prompt questions from you anyway, in which case, you don't have to think of a speech and can just answer yes/no and pick a convenient time.
I think I know how you feel. I always wanted to be at the top.. or at least ONE of the people at the top. It was a lot of pressure, but it was doable for a while. But then things happened and I lost interest or got too scared and I sabotaged myself into not succeeding. I am still kind of sensitive about it, and thinking that people will think less of me or that I am stupid is something that will trigger anxiety or sadness spikes in me (typing this actually makes me feel bad right now.. lol. It's so weird). But I try to remind myself that this is just how life sometimes plays out. And it's not the overdramatic end of everything that it feels like. It takes all kinds to make this world, and I am part of it, and that's okay!
It is okay to not "win" at everything. Some things you can't change and you make the best of it you can and try to find happiness and peace with yourself in your own way. Same thing when it comes to parents. They go and figure it out for themselves too. lol You try to love and support one another if you can, but everyone also makes their own way in their own way. Can you join a support group in your area? Do you have a gay community online to vent to and get support from? Cool siblings?
I have some family that are kind of stuck in a similar situation as you. Homophobic family (well, the older part of it.. I don't think the children part of it care), homosexual and hasn't come out because they still live with them. It's difficult, but it doesn't make you bad, and definitely doesn't make you the worst. If you can do it and you're close to finishing your schooling, then try to finish it. You can always go into something else you want later. Focus on making the small accomplishments in front of you right now (do your homework lol, study a chapter, write a resume, etc.) and know that your path is not irreversible. You can always do something else. Try something new. You have a lot of time ahead of you to do all sorts of things.
Well, I'm glad those thoughts drifted back into the thought stream and out of the picture for now. Focus on the good thoughts you do have and do remember, and take a deep breath and let those more miserable ones go wherever without taking you with them. Have a drink of water. Brush your teeth. Wash your face. Comb your hair. Feel fresh and accomplished for doing so.
I am going to get a haircut tomorrow. I have needed one for monnthhss.. Are any of you in need of one? If any of you decide to do the same, it would be like in parallel together with me and that'd be cool.
Hopefully you all can try to tuck yourselves in a little extra nicely tonight, because why not? Might as well! It's okay to be nice to yourself. Have a relaxing sleep, everyone.
Listen to this man.
If you're in the UK and not sure how to go about getting a therapist for the first time, go here for a list of lots of accredited therapists in your postcode area:
http://www.itsgoodtotalk.org.uk/therapists/
http://www.itsgoodtotalk.org.uk/therapists/
Thanks for this. Do you know how I could get referred to a psychiatrist through the NHS? I know therapy works too but my problems are serious enough that I think I'll need meds too. The therapist I spoke to on the phone said as much.
scar tissue
Banned
All I read was another typical "Just try harder and your depression/anxiety will disappear" post.
e.g.
I'm not even insulted, that's just pretty ignorant and stupid. Do you guys even have depression/anxiety/some kind of mental disorder, or are you just dishing out "useful" advice ITT?
I'm not all that anxious to have sex right now, or even this year at all costs. The problem is, since I didn't get laid in the past 6 years, and girls mostly don't care for me at all, I might not get laid ever, if stuff doesn't change. I just don't have a fucking chance. And it only gets worse: right now, I am a 23 y/o virgin. It's going to be fun being a 30 y/o virgin. How am I supposed to not make a big deal out of that?
As for lowering my standards: I'd probably have sex with about 80% of the girls see at university, and probably around 50-60% of the general female populace in my age (basically everyone but the morbidly obese, extremely filthy or generally trashy attitude). I'm not going to lower them any further.
I was mostly agreeing with him about the attractiveness thingy.
Scar Tissue you are not at all too late to still have a sex life. I'm not familiar with your situation outside the social anxiety, but I was in a similar state of mind once. A big change in my social circles was the key to get rid of my fears/anxiety.
And i'm not depressed now, but I was when I was younger. At some point I had no social life at all. No family support, no friends and I'm kinda lucky to have survived that phase alive. Then again luck has nothing to do with it. Just my decision to move and leave all the shit behind.
Scar Tissue you are not at all too late to still have a sex life. I'm not familiar with your situation outside the social anxiety, but I was in a similar state of mind once. A big change in my social circles was the key to get rid of my fears/anxiety.
And i'm not depressed now, but I was when I was younger. At some point I had no social life at all. No family support, no friends and I'm kinda lucky to have survived that phase alive. Then again luck has nothing to do with it. Just my decision to move and leave all the shit behind.
Collete
Member
I'm starting to realize my major and life options I have made up till now are a big mistake. I don't think I can go the life I wanted with a Psych degree.
But that said, all the other options presented require a great deal of stress and study for the salary I want.
*sigh*
Thanks...still nothing though. I'm starting to feel like they're ignoring me on purpose because I'm unemployed and require a sliding scale fee...
But that said, all the other options presented require a great deal of stress and study for the salary I want.
*sigh*
Thanks...still nothing though. I'm starting to feel like they're ignoring me on purpose because I'm unemployed and require a sliding scale fee...
Burgess_101
Member
BruiserBear
Banned
Many people recover from depression or anxiety problems without using medications. It is absolutely possible, and some experts would even tell you it's preferable. So that may not have been a person trying to get rid of you, and instead may have been someone giving you their honest opinion.
scar tissue
Banned
I've been there too. Two years ago, I literally had zero friends. Right now, I'm okay in the friends department. I've got a few friends and a few people who aren't quite friends.
I don't feel quite as worthless as I did back then, having friends is pretty cool I guess. But for my anxiety, that did nothing. My friends and acquaintances mostly fall into one of two categories: A) normal, can't relate to my problems or B) have depression/anxiety too. Neither are really that helpful in getting over anxiety/depression, because A) can't understand what's up and B) tells me I'm doing fine anyway, considering the circumstances.
As for my sex life, yeah, unless shit changes radically, it's not going to happen. I know/knew a few girls who have depression themselves (some of which are rather cute), but even they have boyfriends. And I doubt they'd be interested in me if they wouldn't have any. I'll admit there were, in total, maybe 4 situations where I could've gotten laid, but I was practically frozen in place by my anxiety and the window of opportunity quickly closed. And 4 opportunities in the last 6 years isn't all that great, is it. Better than nothing but certainly not enough to gain any kind of practice.
I can attest to how it is among straight men. It's not as difficult. Really.
I can count several relationships which fell into my lap which I had to stop before they started. That's not even remotely how it is in the gay community and it's not simply because the potential pool of mates is lower. It's just harder to get around these hurdles.
There are most certainly days when I wish I could go back.
EDIT: You know what else? Women really didn't care so much about my body. They cared because I thought the way they do. It's very damaging to go from being able to find someone who likes you and doesn't mind your physical features so much, and then going to a field where your choice is very limited and you're very heavily scrutinized based on nothing more than appearance. I'm not saying either as generalities, but I wouldn't be shocked if you found them to be true more often than not.
Here's lot of info for you:
http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/Postnataldepression/Pages/Introduction.aspx
She doesn't have to get meds, if the doctor offers them she can refuse. In which case he'd look at what kind of therapy would be best. I would suggest be supportive of her decision to be against meds, speak out against them yourself, if she thinks you're on her side she may be more receptive of you.
I used to have this issue where I'd procrastinate before any phone calls. I didn't want to make them, I'd think about what I was going to say, it was bit of a struggle. So often I'd put it off for a couple of days. Recently I used PStec to fix it. Just before a call I'd use the track and it would reduce my anxiety and then I was able to push myself a little to make the call. The drop in anxiety was permanent. I did it 3 times and now the anxiety is almost gone completely. In fact just today when I woke up I realised I had a call to make and I did it without any hesitation.
PStec is designed specifically for emotional problems. It's helped with most of mine(I'm still working through the rest). You should have a look.
MisterLuffy
Member
I just got resigned in my job so I'm in my room, in the dark, getting angry at myself. I'm such a failure at life and it's true. I'm tired of me for always giving up on myself. I feel like I'm going to college in vain because I'm not putting so much effort in studying to make use of my education. I never been more stupider and worthless in my life. I rarely make friends nowadays.
I feel really burned out right now. so there is little to no work being done. Unable to focus because anxiety and stress also procrastination. No real social connections to speak of because of anxiety and poor decision making on my part. I feel everything is passing me by and that makes me angry because I need to change, improve and get better.
On a positive note and i am going to the gym everyday so far this week. My diet could could be better but I cut out sweet and sugar. I also lost 8 pounds since the start of the year.
On a positive note and i am going to the gym everyday so far this week. My diet could could be better but I cut out sweet and sugar. I also lost 8 pounds since the start of the year.
I wish I had good thoughts right now. All of my thoughts right now are regarding how I basically have no one to consider a friend (even if someone else considers me a friend and themselves a friend to me, I can't see it that way; my trust in people at my school is just gone), and how fucked I am for school this semester. My concentration and memory are gone. Trying to do calculus homework right now, and a question I completely forgot how to do a question that was assigned about 3 days ago. French? I have no idea what the fuck is going on. Chem? I totally forgot about stoich. Bio? Well we're not doing anything yet, so no worries there yet.
Wish I could sleep tonight; 40-something calculus questions and I know nothing. (Granted my teacher sucks.) I now understand why so many people drop out of secondary school. Can't say the thought hasn't crossed my mind. I'm enough of a failure as it is.
you could start by not making a big deal out of things that haven't even happened yet , like you being a 30 yo virgin.
TUROK
Member
As am I (on top of never having had a girlfriend). It takes a serious toll on one's mind, to the point where you wonder what the fuck is wrong with you, but you can't give up. I haven't given up yet, even though I have to fight the urge to just say "fuck it, I'm just gonna give up" every day.
I've found that the girls I know find it "cute", but I am waiting for someone I actually care about. If it's framed in a "nobody likes me and I can't get any" way, it will probably look different.
When you said that you had some opportunities to get laid, but your anxiety prevented it, what did you mean?
There's also studies that those who lose their virginity later are more susceptible to sexual dysfunction problems. It's a double edged sword.
Sidenote: Feels nice knowing I didn't fuck up my liver to the point of failure. Time to quit drinking and doing drugs for a while.
Collete
Member
Had to do some errands, but least to say it's been the first time I've been out in ages...
When I was getting myself ready to get out, I looked in the mirror and I kept thinking "I look like someone who has died...Feels like I'm dressing the dead."
Was a real struggle to get out of the door but eventually I did.
Also did a surprise for even myself, I treated myself to something nice as a reward for going outside. Took some 20 minutes of convincing but I eventually I bought it.
Still doesn't mask that I'm failing school though...eh.
When I was getting myself ready to get out, I looked in the mirror and I kept thinking "I look like someone who has died...Feels like I'm dressing the dead."
Was a real struggle to get out of the door but eventually I did.
Also did a surprise for even myself, I treated myself to something nice as a reward for going outside. Took some 20 minutes of convincing but I eventually I bought it.
Still doesn't mask that I'm failing school though...eh.
lifa-cobex
Member
Just reading through some of your posts.
Well done for steeping out today. Years ago it would takes me hours to work up the motivation to go. Even when I did it's headphones on, out an in as quick as possible.
Try to make a habit of doing something positive (like getting yourself a treat).
Eventually you wont need to and you wont even think about it.
Work/school wise that sucks. I'm currently in a garage learning about cars on a reasonable wadge. It's something I never planned and have very little interest in. Kinda just fell into it through desperation for work.
It really really fucks me up some days. The way the place is run, getting covered in oil and shit everyday. What really bugs me is the general garage atmosphere though. All day I hear "I fucked this bird, got into this fight the other night, got pissed and car porn."
However I always remind myself It's just one chapter of my life from many. It's not forever.
Life always changes for better/ for worse even if you try and prevent it.
Years ago my friend moved away and regularly visited him. One day he just asked If I wanted to move up with him.
Not thinking about it too much I said yes. Packed a bag of clothes and lived on his pull out bed for a month or two.
Eventually I landed a job at Bose (phones help line) but fucking loved it. Got my own place, met new friends from work and life was good.
Few years later lost my job, lost contact with people and never met the light of day if I could help it. Life was bad.
Life went up again, life went down again. Went through jobs/people. Occasionally broken harts.
I think you see my point. Just keep going and at some point I'm sure you'll find yourself saying "WTF where am I?"
Collete
Member
Thanks...It was a big (and a bit horrifying) step for me.
I have been saying "WTF where am I?" as of late... (which I guess it's cause of half my depression as of late). I'm in a Psych undergraduate degree and I'm thinking of changing it to get a bigger salary. But that said, I have no idea what to change it to, mainly because I just can't deal with stress well at all or a copious amount of studying.
I wanted to go into the arts, but not like I'll get paid, if at all with a degree in that.
I've been questioning myself for some days and I just can't find an answer to where I should go or what to do.
I appreciate you replying to me, I didn't think anyone actually goes through my posts.
lifa-cobex
Member
I always wanted to go into art myself. Same problem though, pays next to nothing.
I remember talking to my uncle about it (he's a tattooist). He always wanted to design posters for movies/books etc. He's really talented and does some fantastic fantasy work for things like Lord of the Rings etc.
He could never break into it though. It bums him out a bit I think.
However he has always said that he enjoyed the journey and he wouldn't change it no matter how difficult it was.
He can still support his family quite well and still does something that is apart of something he loves even if it wasn't what he imagined he would be doing at the start.
Burgess_101
Member
Went to the doctors today and am now on some medication, a step in the right direction finally.
scar tissue
Banned
Well, I obviously haven't had a girlfriend either.
As for the opportunities, last year I was in Greece on vacation with a few buddies, and we met some other people there. This girl from the US was obviously super into me, almost to the point of desperation (she wasn't that hot but I still kinda liked her), and about a week later there was a german girl (pretty hot) who seemed willing as well (although it wasn't quite as obvious, a friend later told me that he was 100% sure I'd only have needed to go in for the kiss and could've taken her back to my room practically instantly).
I was a different kind of person because I was on vacation and not back home. I don't think I've ever had a chance to get laid back here.
Even though the girls were willing, I'd have needed to make the first move and I can't do that. Well, I did manage to do it once actually, made out with a slutty (is there any nice way to say that? dunno) girl, that was fun.
Bottom line is, the women don't want me, and when they do, my anxiety cockblocks me anyway.
tl;dr: DOOMED
KevinCow: glad to have you back, I always felt your ban was very unfair.
There are quite a few things you can do with a psych degree, but as is the case with just about any degree nowadays, if you want to make a really nice salary, you're going to need advanced training. I have a BS in chemistry and I got recruited pretty hard right out of college. The jobs paid well right off the bat, but they stayed pretty flat across your career, the opportunities for advancement were not great, and you had basically zero control over what you worked on. I could have had a nice career at Eli Lilly, but it was just too...I dunno. I was trained to be an independent investigator. My prospects for graduate and/or medical school were very bright. I always felt like I'd be running my own show, you know?
I'm not trying to turn this into a big thing about me (not this time, just every other time). I just want to point out that, even with a degree that is in demand, higher salaries, professional autonomy, career flexibility - it generally hinges on advanced training.
A psychology degree likely won't get you amazing job opportunities that aren't already open to anyone with any college degree. But, you do have the opportunity to pursue further training in clinical practice or research. Clinical psychologists are very much in demand as most of the country has woefully inadequate mental health care (as we all well know). It will take time and money and all the rest of it to get your professional degree, but a Psy.D will open up a lot of jobs.
The more research-oriented track, culminating in a PhD, lets you do the same stuff, but opens up more doors in research (obviously). I worked with a psychologist during my time studying alcohol addiction. This sort of broad neuroscience research strikes me as the real future for PhD psychologists. Taking more biology, biochemistry, etc. now will give you more opportunities to slot into biomedical research.
If your school offers cognitive science or neuroscience programs, at my school, those were basically the more rigorous alternatives to psychology (which was a huge major with plenty of losers). You could either jump majors or just take classes in those other programs to show you're serious.
For a future in clinical practice, anthro or sociology classes might be more helpful.
Of course, at the end of the day, you can just say fuck it and apply to medical or law school, or get your MBA...
nahhh. i know how you feel man. that shit sucks. you just have to keep trying to push through. you're for sure going to be a virgin forever if you dont try. its scary as fuck tho, i know.
There's a lot of people clinging to hope in this thread and you're stronger than you know.
Meds are a good first step if you can get them. They will blunt your (negative/sad/bad) emotions so that you can cope.
That's the first step. Once you get to the point where you can cope a doctor/therapist/mental health professional will be in a position to help determine what caused you to become depressed.
Was it situational? Is it negative thought patterns? Chemical imbalance? A combination of factors?
For negative thought patterns it can feel hopeless. You may be on anti-depressants and feel less like shit but not enough to matter.
If persistant negative thought patterns are a problem find a therapist that can help with cognitive behavior therapy. There are many books on it but if you're really struggling you likely need the continual support of a professional. At the very least it will make things much easier.
There are essentially four simple steps... the hard part is sticking with it when things get tough (and they will) and your brain instinctively goes back to it's comfort zone and negative self talk.
*recognize and relabel an unwanted/unhealthy thought for what it is.
*reframe the negative thought and change your perception of it. this is not me
*refocus and put your attention into something else
*revalue the negative thoughts... 'these are bullshit impulses from my brain, move along'
Here's a good article from a reputable source.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/use-your-mind-change-your-brain/201106/you-are-not-your-brain
Below her profile pic you can read more about her background and a book she co-authored. I've read a ton of self help books and its been by far the most helpful. It's simple and direct but you have to do the work of changing the way you think.
Do what you can to help yourself but if you can get the support of a professional, take it. It will make things easier and they can help you when things get tough or you slip.
Besides dropping the negative thoughts, there's something that will get you out of bed every morning, you just have to find out what it is.
Meds are a good first step if you can get them. They will blunt your (negative/sad/bad) emotions so that you can cope.
That's the first step. Once you get to the point where you can cope a doctor/therapist/mental health professional will be in a position to help determine what caused you to become depressed.
Was it situational? Is it negative thought patterns? Chemical imbalance? A combination of factors?
For negative thought patterns it can feel hopeless. You may be on anti-depressants and feel less like shit but not enough to matter.
If persistant negative thought patterns are a problem find a therapist that can help with cognitive behavior therapy. There are many books on it but if you're really struggling you likely need the continual support of a professional. At the very least it will make things much easier.
There are essentially four simple steps... the hard part is sticking with it when things get tough (and they will) and your brain instinctively goes back to it's comfort zone and negative self talk.
*recognize and relabel an unwanted/unhealthy thought for what it is.
*reframe the negative thought and change your perception of it. this is not me
*refocus and put your attention into something else
*revalue the negative thoughts... 'these are bullshit impulses from my brain, move along'
Here's a good article from a reputable source.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/use-your-mind-change-your-brain/201106/you-are-not-your-brain
Below her profile pic you can read more about her background and a book she co-authored. I've read a ton of self help books and its been by far the most helpful. It's simple and direct but you have to do the work of changing the way you think.
Do what you can to help yourself but if you can get the support of a professional, take it. It will make things easier and they can help you when things get tough or you slip.
Besides dropping the negative thoughts, there's something that will get you out of bed every morning, you just have to find out what it is.
Bel Marduk
Banned
Oh, wow. That's a lot of stuff to be upset about.
1. Don't live your life to achieve goals other people have for you.
2. If you feel fat, then lose weight. Do this and you will feel better about yourself and be in a much
better position to tackle your other problems. Exercise also releases endorphins and you will
naturally feel better about yourself and make better decisions without a cloud of depression
constantly over your head.
3. You're gay? So am I. So are lots and lots of people. You can't change your sexual orientation and
you would be wrong to try. If your dad is a homophobe it is HIM that has the problem not you.
4. Being in the closet is the most depressing and unproductive thing a gay person can do TO
themselves. You Will never get a boyfriend if you're in the closet.
5. Your failures are so bad that you want to kill youself? How old are you to put this all in perspective?
I've been doing exercise since last week, I'm not sure but I would say that I'm having less negative thoughts. I still have a lot of them but there's no emotion to them. It's like "yes I want to kill myself...what I ate for breakfast again?".
I'm not worried so much about people either I think, it's like (again) my brain is expecting the anxiety to start and it doesn't. Pretty weird, I guess I'm used to being anxious all the time.
I have not talked with a doctor yet, I think I will give exercise and diet a try until my next birthday, I will go then if I feel worse again.
I'm not worried so much about people either I think, it's like (again) my brain is expecting the anxiety to start and it doesn't. Pretty weird, I guess I'm used to being anxious all the time.
I have not talked with a doctor yet, I think I will give exercise and diet a try until my next birthday, I will go then if I feel worse again.
I need to man up and actually start talking to people.
Being quiet for such a long time though has ruined my social skills and I'm not sure I have anything to say any more.
I feel like all my problems are connected and are hurting all aspects of my life. Am I depressed because of my shyness? Do I have low self esteem because I am not working hard at uni? Am I not working hard because I am depressed?
I really feel like I could use a girlfriend to help me grow as a person, but I need to get myself a personality before anyone would be attracted to me or even like me. It's a miracle I have any friends now to be honest, but I am very thankful for that.
All I look forward to now is going out and getting drunk or otherwise fucked up. It's nice to be in that space where I don't have any of that shit on my back and I can just be myself, free of the inhibition that I feel holds me back in my day to day life. I also look forward to the opportunity to meet a girl in this sate, a state in which I appear normal (no luck on that front however).
Non of that shit is permanent though, I need to work on my personality for real, but it's hard to get over the hump and just say what comes to my mind. I have been though this before, and been successful in becoming more outgoing, so I know I can do it.
It just seems harder now as I have been like this for a couple of years now, just coasting along in life, not working for exams, going to a university that is way below my potential, doing a course I have no interest in and that is frankly below me. Yet I still am not optimistic about getting back in.
This period of depression could not be happening at a worse time! I have missed and am missing a period of important growth for me socially, and I am scared that I am not securing myself any kind of future in terms of a degree.
Time is of the essence I suppose. Fuuuuuuuuuck..... blehhh
Yuuup.
Fuck knows how I could ever approach a girl cold, I cant even do it when I know they are up for it.
Edit: Hell, it's 3:00 am, and I'm thinking I wont go into uni tomorrow (start at 9am). I disgust my self. I have been in once this term/semester. I am going to fucking fail, and I know it, and I care, and I am not going to do anything about it because I am to fucking lazy. That line of though has got to be one of the most disgusting traits a human can have, really takes my worth as a member of society down.
My mum has raised me, my step-dad has paid for my education, they have both supported me, given me great opportunities, and I am fucking them right now. I care enough for this to make me feel very sad, but not enough to do something about it. I am an almighty cunt.
Maybe I am being dramatic right now, I am pretty tired.
(I am so self centred that I have just used this thread to shit out my current line of thought. I have spent no time reading anyone else's problems or advice.)
Being quiet for such a long time though has ruined my social skills and I'm not sure I have anything to say any more.
I feel like all my problems are connected and are hurting all aspects of my life. Am I depressed because of my shyness? Do I have low self esteem because I am not working hard at uni? Am I not working hard because I am depressed?
I really feel like I could use a girlfriend to help me grow as a person, but I need to get myself a personality before anyone would be attracted to me or even like me. It's a miracle I have any friends now to be honest, but I am very thankful for that.
All I look forward to now is going out and getting drunk or otherwise fucked up. It's nice to be in that space where I don't have any of that shit on my back and I can just be myself, free of the inhibition that I feel holds me back in my day to day life. I also look forward to the opportunity to meet a girl in this sate, a state in which I appear normal (no luck on that front however).
Non of that shit is permanent though, I need to work on my personality for real, but it's hard to get over the hump and just say what comes to my mind. I have been though this before, and been successful in becoming more outgoing, so I know I can do it.
It just seems harder now as I have been like this for a couple of years now, just coasting along in life, not working for exams, going to a university that is way below my potential, doing a course I have no interest in and that is frankly below me. Yet I still am not optimistic about getting back in.
This period of depression could not be happening at a worse time! I have missed and am missing a period of important growth for me socially, and I am scared that I am not securing myself any kind of future in terms of a degree.
Time is of the essence I suppose. Fuuuuuuuuuck..... blehhh
Yuuup.
Fuck knows how I could ever approach a girl cold, I cant even do it when I know they are up for it.
Edit: Hell, it's 3:00 am, and I'm thinking I wont go into uni tomorrow (start at 9am). I disgust my self. I have been in once this term/semester. I am going to fucking fail, and I know it, and I care, and I am not going to do anything about it because I am to fucking lazy. That line of though has got to be one of the most disgusting traits a human can have, really takes my worth as a member of society down.
My mum has raised me, my step-dad has paid for my education, they have both supported me, given me great opportunities, and I am fucking them right now. I care enough for this to make me feel very sad, but not enough to do something about it. I am an almighty cunt.
Maybe I am being dramatic right now, I am pretty tired.
(I am so self centred that I have just used this thread to shit out my current line of thought. I have spent no time reading anyone else's problems or advice.)
I feel so exhausted all the time. Forced myself through a half-assed workout today that nearly put me in a coma. I had to lay down for an hour and a half. I usually feel better and energetic after a work out but not lately. I should be getting stronger but I swear I'm getting weaker. I feel really angry too like I just want to put my fist through a fucking wall.
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