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Mental Health |OT| Depression & Co.

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PM me your steam nick.

Also could totally still be IBS. IBS isn't a diagnosis you have a lot of testable criteria for. You have irregular bowel movements once in a while, increased during stressful/emotionally taxing situations? That's it. You go check if it's not something else (Crohn's/Colitis being the common testable ones) and if it's nothing else it gets diagnosed as IBS, basically. Very simplified.

Thing that helped me most is cutting out lactose out of my diet, which has the side effect of also helping if your problem is simply lactose intolerance.

/enough with the medical advice online :lol.
Well, I do drink a lot of milk but I haven't in the past two weeks (ran out). I know coffee isn't much help but I need that to wake up in the morning and I don't like the carbonated energy drinks, nor could I afford them anyhow. I thought it was IBS too however, but the cramping is usually not that bad. But yes, during stressful situations and anxiety, my stomach is affected.
 
Well, I do drink a lot of milk but I haven't in the past two weeks (ran out). I know coffee isn't much help but I need that to wake up in the morning and I don't like the carbonated energy drinks, nor could I afford them anyhow. I thought it was IBS too however, but the cramping is usually not that bad. But yes, during stressful situations and anxiety, my stomach is affected.

Stress and anxiety will really do a number on your stomach/gastrointestinal tract. I almost developed Crohn's last year (had I continued on Accutane, I definitely would have), and since then my stomach/bowels haven't really been the same. Especially when I'm stressed out or anxious these days; my stomach will begin to cramp/burn terribly. I have found that eating a cup of yogurt with probiotics helps ease the pain slightly, but only if I keep up with it.

You can do itttttt. Did you end up seeing a doctor for your eye?

On a personal update, there's too much happening in my life right now and I'm not capable of emotionally processing it properly, so I just go along with it and hope it all somehow works out without it totally backfiring or me hurting anybody. Who knows. I'm so confused.

Probably not. Or not all of it, not as well as I need to do, at least. And no, I didn't, after seeing the stye on my upper eyelid and Googling it, but if it hasn't eased by Friday, I'm definitely going.

I should have some time to talk tomorrow, or Friday for sure (all day since there's no school). Or just text me right now/whenever and I'll get back to you asap. I need to contribute here more often.
 
On a personal update, there's too much happening in my life right now and I'm not capable of emotionally processing it properly, so I just go along with it and hope it all somehow works out without it totally backfiring or me hurting anybody. Who knows. I'm so confused.

Ya, this is where I'm at this past month. Trying to date/sleep with people after a few years off, and I'm definitely just sort of letting go, while occasionally having an internal freak out. I want to not distance myself from myself too much so that I can still make sense of it later and not let it get too lucid.
 
Giving myself a break today from physical workout. Worked on my studies a little bit, had a nap and read. Having a bad stomach day today, think I had one piece of chili-chocolate too many. D:
 
After seeing a post on my FB feed today, I realize I'm going to be alone the rest of my life and die alone. I just have way too many physical, mental and emotional problems that will prevent me from ever being with someone I can care about. Bad enough I saw a cool game online today I'd love to buy, realizing I'm literally completely broke but that FB post just straight out burned me. I've been pretty down for the last two weeks, so it's not just "one of those days" but yeah, it surely isn't really off to a good start either.
I feel this too, but it isn't due to Facebook. I can't manage to make any girl interested in me, and it's obvious. Why would they be? If I were a girl, I wouldn't be interested in someone like me.

I wish I could stop thinking about that. Like, never think about it ever again.
 
So I figure that my first post on GAF should be in this thread since this is the thread the pushed me to get an account (I’ve been lurking forever), though I did pop into chat once.

Without going into too many details, several months ago I started to have some vague suicidal thoughts which I thought was odd but I didn’t worry too much about it. Around the same time I started to do poorly at work. I couldn’t get things done and I was really struggling and had no clue as to why. Though I didn’t really notice it at the time, I also had difficulty making even simple decisions at home and I started to withdraw from people. It became difficult to fall asleep, taking me hours. I had no strong emotion about anything. I just didn't care one way or another. I was simply existing.

This went on for months and months, without me even having a clue as to what was wrong (I feel kinda stupid now that I didn’t realize it) until I finally “broke” for lack of a better word. I spent a few days crying in bed not wanting to move with some more serious suicidal thoughts. This frightened me enough to call a friend who dragged me to the doctor. I was diagnosed with depression, put on some anti-depressants and got myself into therapy.

While I’ve been doing much better, I don’t think it would take too much for me to falter again.

I also want to say that this thread has been a great help to me over the past few months.
 
Stress and anxiety will really do a number on your stomach/gastrointestinal tract. I almost developed Crohn's last year (had I continued on Accutane, I definitely would have), and since then my stomach/bowels haven't really been the same. Especially when I'm stressed out or anxious these days; my stomach will begin to cramp/burn terribly. I have found that eating a cup of yogurt with probiotics helps ease the pain slightly, but only if I keep up with it.
I heard about the yogurt thing and I do love yogurt. I'm going to make sure to pick some up whenever I can next.

I feel this too, but it isn't due to Facebook. I can't manage to make any girl interested in me, and it's obvious. Why would they be? If I were a girl, I wouldn't be interested in someone like me.

I wish I could stop thinking about that. Like, never think about it ever again.
Facebook just bums me out because I see people having a good time, people in relationships, certain people who talk non stop about politics, etc. A certain post just got to me the wrong way today because it was this person I have as a friend of FB going off about "friendzoned idiots" and how she thinks guys feel they're entitled and expect sex for being nice, which I find to be totally off and it all around came off mean spirited. I guess I took it a bit personally since I'm "that guy" who gets "friendzoned". However, things she mentioned don't apply to me, like expecting sex (I'd like an actual girlfriend or relationship) or guys who won't take no for an answer (also not me.... a girl says no, I never go further.... no means no). Hell, I can't remember the last time I went up to a girl and even tried to ask her out. I have problems enough initiating conversations. And that's with anyone, not just women!

I'm a tall, skinny goofy fugly looking guy who's very clumsy, socially awkward, below average intelligence, neurotic and anxiety ridden. I kinda look like a tall, skinny Jeff Goldblum (he's good looking, though) with an overbite if you really need visuals. Mix that in with the mental and emotional issues I have and you can imagine why not a single woman would want anything to do with me other than a friendship. And making/keeping friends is another thing too.

Edit: Just came to the realization I've only had two bites of food today and it's almost 9pm where I'm at.
 
Windam I had a lot of fun helping you with that math! That was a very pleasant evening.
 
Facebook just bums me out because I see people having a good time, people in relationships, certain people who talk non stop about politics, etc. A certain post just got to me the wrong way today because it was this person I have as a friend of FB going off about "friendzoned idiots" and how she thinks guys feel they're entitled and expect sex for being nice, which I find to be totally off and it all around came off mean spirited. I guess I took it a bit personally since I'm "that guy" who gets "friendzoned". However, things she mentioned don't apply to me, like expecting sex (I'd like an actual girlfriend or relationship) or guys who won't take no for an answer (also not me.... a girl says no, I never go further.... no means no). Hell, I can't remember the last time I went up to a girl and even tried to ask her out. I have problems enough initiating conversations. And that's with anyone, not just women!

I'm a tall, skinny goofy fugly looking guy who's very clumsy, socially awkward, below average intelligence, neurotic and anxiety ridden. I kinda look like a tall, skinny Jeff Goldblum (he's good looking, though) with an overbite if you really need visuals. Mix that in with the mental and emotional issues I have and you can imagine why not a single woman would want anything to do with me other than a friendship. And making/keeping friends is another thing too.

Edit: Just came to the realization I've only had two bites of food today and it's almost 9pm where I'm at.
We're not too different, you and I. Though I am not too tall, I'd say average, and I look like Macaulay Culkin (I've been teased for it all my life, lol). I too have lots of trouble talking with strangers, and don't have a single female friend, nor would dare to ask any woman out (luckily I still see my high school friends from time to time).

I totally understand what you mean about being friendzoned, and yet being different than other guys. I do.

Guess this is it, this is what my life will always be about: work, video games and music (and forcing myself to go to university, but that's futile). Nothing else, nothing interesting, nothing worth living for. Of course, it's much less worth dying for, so I'd rather live if only because I have no better thing to do. You know what? If you want, feel free to PM me/add me on Steam or whatever.
 
We're not too different, you and I. Though I am not too tall, I'd say average, and I look like Macaulay Culkin (I've been teased for it all my life, lol). I too have lots of trouble talking with strangers, and don't have a single female friend, nor would dare to ask any woman out (luckily I still see my high school friends from time to time).

I totally understand what you mean about being friendzoned, and yet being different than other guys. I do.

Guess this is it, this is what my life will always be about: work, video games and music (and forcing myself to go to university, but that's futile). Nothing else, nothing interesting, nothing worth living for. Of course, it's much less worth dying for, so I'd rather live if only because I have no better thing to do. You know what? If you want, feel free to PM me/add me on Steam or whatever.
Some really cool people in this thread, that's for sure.

I went ahead and shot you off a PM. I have a Steam account and gonna try and remember it. I have only one game on there I think.

But regarding what you said, yeah pretty similar. I do have a few female friends, who I met through other friends of mine - mostly ex-girlfriends of my friends. It sounds like you certainly have a lot of passion, which is something I lack. What I have is nearly four decades of gaming so it's been a hobby of mine since the Magnavox Odyssey 2. Not much of a turn on, I know. Heh.
 
Some really cool people in this thread, that's for sure.

I went ahead and shot you off a PM. I have a Steam account and gonna try and remember it. I have only one game on there I think.

But regarding what you said, yeah pretty similar. I do have a few female friends, who I met through other friends of mine - mostly ex-girlfriends of my friends. It sounds like you certainly have a lot of passion, which is something I lack. What I have is nearly four decades of gaming so it's been a hobby of mine since the Magnavox Odyssey 2. Not much of a turn on, I know. Heh.
I don't know if I can call it passion. I do like playing games, and love listening to music (bought 4 CDs today, I seriously gotta stop doing that), but it doesn't prevent me from feeling empty. And my bass playing skills are simply awful. Nah, as much as I like that stuff, I still believe that I need to get a girlfriend, despite probably not being the solution and me ruining everything.

You played all those retro consoles? That's amazing! Are they as bad as the AVGN (NSFW!) made them seem? You have lots of experience on the field, so that's a great thing, at least for me.
 
I don't know if I can call it passion. I do like playing games, and love listening to music (bought 4 CDs today, I seriously gotta stop doing that), but it doesn't prevent me from feeling empty. And my bass playing skills are simply awful. Nah, as much as I like that stuff, I still believe that I need to get a girlfriend, despite probably not being the solution and me ruining everything.

You played all those retro consoles? That's amazing! Are they as bad as the AVGN (NSFW!) made them seem? You have lots of experience on the field, so that's a great thing, at least for me.
I'm as bad with games as you are with CDs when I have the monies. The one positive thing I had with my ex-girlfriend was she was a true gamer. She actually had knowledge of obscure JRPGs and had a limited edition copy of one of the Growlanser games (which I never heard until she busts it out).

Yeah, I played a lot of the games AVGN did which is why I love watching him. Some of the games he plays I really like but some others and truly the duds he makes them out to be.... Seriously, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is as bad as he said.

Edit: Welcome to the forum, ShadowKat.
 
Feel like I really just need to tell this to someone, even if it is just a bunch of random strangers on the internet.

I just feel sad sometimes. It can be about little things like hearing really sad stuff on the news. It could be about really stupid stuff like today my sister came over and brought a little bit of food for our Memorial Day gathering and that after she left I drank the last of a 2 liter bottle of Dr. Pepper she brought and ate the rest of the taco dip she brought. I was hungry after watching the hockey game that was on so I ate it and drank the Dr. Pepper. Afterwards I just felt guilty. It is so stupid to get worked up about something like that but I've been just a wreck for a little while now.

Sometimes feeling sad means feeling guilty or just helpless in my life. I don't have a job and I think money and not having it plays a huge part in how I feel. I absolutely hate when people buy me things. I almost have to convince myself weekly that my parents paying for part of my college isn't the worst thing anyone has ever done. It almost becomes like how much can I possibly live with in terms of people paying for things for me. I've never once asked a friend to pick up a tab going out to eat or anything but often times he does and I feel really guilty. I feel like even one time it happens that I'm taking advantage of him, even though in the past I've also paid for him for things.

I'm fairly certain that there are aspects of my body that aren't quite right and it definitely plays a part in how I feel sometimes. I look really young and my voice is laughably high pitched and squeaky. There are other physical things that I don't really want to get into but I know for 27 years old they aren't natural. I am not at all physically like other people my age. I know that and my outlook on life has mostly been to just roll with whatever happens. But lately it's just been bugging me and it makes the whole feeling sad part really terrible because I feel like I can't control this. It's just sort of something I'm born with I guess.

I've never really told anyone how I feel. Most people who would meet me would think that I'm perfectly normal other than the physical things that are definitely not. I have what I'd consider a pretty normal social life. If I told my friends some of the scary thoughts I've had I think that most of them would be pretty surprised because of how well I can just seem happy and ok like nothing is the matter. I've thought about suicide before and in the back of my mind sometimes it is like that parachute to just get out if things get too bad. I suspect that I would never have the courage to go through with something like that because I'd never want to hurt my parents or friends like that.

I knew I had a problem when I was actually thinking about a suicide note and would I write one and what would I say to make my loved ones feel better about anything eventually happening to me. It was one of those moments of clarity where you realize what you are thinking and try to figure out how exactly it got to that point.

I guess I'm writing this because I'm just completely worn down from feeling like this. I'm too afraid to tell my parents anything is really wrong. I don't think they suspect that physically anything is wrong with me because I've never told them. And mentally I guess my mom knows that I get down from time to time but I think she'd be horrified to learn the extent of it. Some days I feel like I just can't keep it up because it's a constant struggle between being this friendly and quick witted person everyone knows me as and the often times emotional wreck that I am underneath. Many days it does feel like an absolute grind and there are many times I wish I had even just one person to be able to talk to.

Sorry that this is really long and I know most people probably won't read through it all but if even one person does then I guess my goal was accomplished. Also want to make it very clear that I'm not a danger to myself and that I do not (ab)use drugs or alcohol.

Even if we don't post replies, please don't interpret this as if no one takes notice and doesn't read your posts. We have lurkers here and people who read through, and your post(s) may actively encourage them; that they are not alone in their sadness, and that other people can relate. ;)

Sometimes, I'll get pms from some people wondering how I am. And other times I'll just pm somebody and see how they are.

edit: I'm glad for any pms that I do get. Regardless of whether they are to do with the creative writing/poetry thread or with this thread or just something completely random (those are the best ones!). :P
 
For anyone out there still playing medication roulette, I recommend you try Effexor (Venlafaxine ). Only thing that has been effective for my Major Depression. Wellbutrin, Sertraline, Citalopram, Fluoxetine and many others were all pretty much ineffective for me. Sheeit I used to be on Bi-Polar meds before I was properly diagnosed. But don't get it twisted, meds alone aren't enough. Seek professional help.
 
Thank fuck Kevin is ok. "Tough love" shitposts on internet forums can really push an unstable person over the edge.
People need to understand how and when to use tough love. I'm not saying you need to handle everyone with kid gloves, but brow beating does not work with everyone.

Feeling a little better today. I managed to get out of bed and make breakfast, which is progress.
 
God I'm just so frustrated right now. At work today I socialized quite a bit by my traditional standards, I made co-workers laugh and everybody seemed to be having a good time, but I just felt nothing. It did nothing to lower my feelings of isolation and loneliness. It felt as if I wasn't there at all. I was physically present but emotionally I was elsewhere and my mind was only taking things in at a superficial level.

Meanwhile I'm worrying incessantly about potential redundancy and feel inadequate at my job because there is one task at work that has taken me a while to get my head around (though I think I've mastered it now) and another that I have messed up on recently (though not entirely my fault).

I feel so disengaged and unconnected with the world right now. I try to force myself to engage in hobbies like reading and videogames but I get no pleasure out of them.

I'm starting to think that I need to be more emotionally expressive to actually connect with people on an emotional level but worry about people thinking that I'm putting on clown-faces or putting on an act, particularly as people have got used to me being emotionally unexpressive and withdrawn up to this point. A big problem with emotional openness I have is that I feel so exposed and vulnerable, and I feel like I would not be able to cope with the hurt if I got a negative response ( I am very sensitive emotionally as it is). I don't trust people enough to open up to them I think.
 
Thank fuck Kevin is ok. "Tough love" shitposts on internet forums can really push an unstable person over the edge.
Tough love can sometimes be useful for those who are occasionally down but otherwise emotionally "normal". Attitudes like this however....

"Pull yourself up by your bootstraps."
"Stop feeling sorry for yourself"
"Pity party."
"There's people starving in Africa and YOU'RE depressed!?"

.... I do not see being helpful one bit especially when someone starts comparing your problems with the rest of the world's. To me, that's nothing more than putting a guilt trip on someone and doesn't solve any problems.
 
I so need a new job, my current one is just miserable. I've thought about so many times just going in and quitting, even though I have no other job lined up. I'm searching for work right now, hopefully I can get something with better hours at least. I'm in retail currently and close almost every day I fucking work. So I'm stuck in that hell till about 12 AM four or five days out of the week, which totally kills any chance at a social life I might have. I used to just hate it when I was there, but it's beginning to creep into other areas of my life and I hate it. hate it hate it hate it hate it. The day I leave that shithole will be one of the happiest days of my life.


I'm also having problems with eating, I just have no will to do it. The past few days I've eaten one meal a day, and they aren't big meals. It will be a sandwich or something. I have no drive to eat, and when I do because I know I should, it feels forced and foreign almost. =/
 
I decided to try cutting just to see why teenage girls did it so much. It's stupid and it hurts, but now I'm doing it out of boredom. I don't get it. But now I'm an emo 16 year old girl. I need to get me some Ashba SWAG and Jeff Hardy face paint immediately.
 
I so need a new job, my current one is just miserable. I've thought about so many times just going in and quitting, even though I have no other job lined up. I'm searching for work right now, hopefully I can get something with better hours at least. I'm in retail currently and close almost every day I fucking work. So I'm stuck in that hell till about 12 AM four or five days out of the week, which totally kills any chance at a social life I might have. I used to just hate it when I was there, but it's beginning to creep into other areas of my life and I hate it. hate it hate it hate it hate it. The day I leave that shithole will be one of the happiest days of my life.
How many people work with you? Can you talk to your boss?

I'm also having problems with eating, I just have no will to do it. The past few days I've eaten one meal a day, and they aren't big meals. It will be a sandwich or something. I have no drive to eat, and when I do because I know I should, it feels forced and foreign almost. =/
Going through this myself, in fact, in the past few days as well.
 
Christ, just when you think things are going well something always has to happen. I'm just so frustrated with my family. We are a fucked up bunch, everyone has their own mental issues, but I can't relate to anyone in this fucking house. I almost broke my bedroom door in half, goddammit. This is the anger that I would channel into self-harm behaviors like cutting, I have no idea what to do with this anger. I just want to hurt something, which usually means myself.


Edit: I think the worst has passed, but now I simply feel like garbage. Useless trash.
 
Even if we don't post replies, please don't interpret this as if no one takes notice and doesn't read your posts. We have lurkers here and people who read through, and your post(s) may actively encourage them; that they are not alone in their sadness, and that other people can relate. ;)

This! I try to read as much as I can but I've been working a lot lately. Sometimes it's just a timing thing. I also have a personal rule where I try not to respond to posts in here until I feel I am familiar enough with the poster or the type of problem they're having. If possible, I like to get more of a feel for what is going on with someone over a period of time before offering advice or support. I feel that way I might be able to help more if I have a better idea of where someone is "at" mentally.

I myself use this thread as my own personal progress check with how I am doing since it's one of the few forums I still regularly post at. Never feel like you can't drop in and get something off your chest in here. But it's important to be able to walk away from what you just let out without apprehension or anxiety to how the community will respond.

We're all here for a reason; getting to everything just takes time. :)

Sometimes, I'll get pms from some people wondering how I am. And other times I'll just pm somebody and see how they are.

LOL I read the bolded part and before I finished the sentence I was like "hey me too!" :U


Christ, just when you think things are going well something always has to happen. I'm just so frustrated with my family. We are a fucked up bunch, everyone has their own mental issues, but I can't relate to anyone in this fucking house. I almost broke my bedroom door in half, goddammit. This is the anger that I would channel into self-harm behaviors like cutting, I have no idea what to do with this anger. I just want to hurt something, which usually means myself.


Edit: I think the worst has passed, but now I simply feel like garbage. Useless trash.

Do you have a gym membership or is it nice where you are right now? Go for a run, a walk, or even sprint. Even putting yourself out of breath a little bit can help elevate your mood and give you some adrenaline/pain.
 
About a minute or so ago I had a major dizzy spell and I'm almost certain it's the insomnia and lack of appetite. I really need to get a hold of some kind of sleep aid soon as I believe the insomnia is contributing to my appetite and stomach issues. I've been feeling a bit weak and dizzy lately, but the one that just passed now was pretty strong.
 
A Brief History of Mental Illness in Art
the-madhouse-1735.jpg

Sorry I haven't been terribly helpful in a while. I've been struggling with my own crap, more than usual. I cycle down pretty regularly, for no reason I can explain. I'll get to the point where I can barely talk, it's all just so painful.

Like Ashes1396 said, you can draw a lot of strength from this community. I think the general rule is reach out and people will reach back. I like a nice PM every now and then, too, and I send out more than my fair share (hey, I just hit 1400 messages in my inbox, which I guess is kind of a lot. But people contacting me out of the blue is kind of a new thing since the new thread went up. I initiated most of those conversations). People are extremely friendly here, and I know we have all of these little micro-networks - Fiction being her amazing self and watching out for kevincow is the most visible example of how we have each others backs.

For me, when I start really trending down, I can usually count on a solid two weeks of complete despair. But the last two times it has happened, the worst has passed in a couple of days. And I really attribute that to people keeping after me with messages, in chat, on steam, or just seeing people help each other in here. There's a kind of collective strength we build up. Like Nithidia said, it's nice when someone has been around a little, popped into chat, and people get a chance to know them a bit (had an EPICALLY stupid mumble chat with humbugs, nithidia, and crew the other night, which I'm still laughing about, and Boem was really nice in chat when I was feeling so down - <3 ya, guys!). We have enough people who visit chat each day (and then split off from there to play games or get on the mumble server) that, if one person is feeling down, there are enough people who are doing alright to kind of cheer them up. It really works for me, at any rate.

Anyway, I'll get back to posting more. I still read everything, but I haven't felt like I've had much to say lately. That's more about me than about what people are saying.
 
Tough love can sometimes be useful for those who are occasionally down but otherwise emotionally "normal". Attitudes like this however....

"Pull yourself up by your bootstraps."
"Stop feeling sorry for yourself"
"Pity party."
"There's people starving in Africa and YOU'RE depressed!?"

.... I do not see being helpful one bit especially when someone starts comparing your problems with the rest of the world's. To me, that's nothing more than putting a guilt trip on someone and doesn't solve any problems.

Yup. especially since that's how depression manifests itself psychology and behaviorally. Those posts are just reinforcing his negative though patterns making them a reality.
 
Do you have a gym membership or is it nice where you are right now? Go for a run, a walk, or even sprint. Even putting yourself out of breath a little bit can help elevate your mood and give you some adrenaline/pain.

I don't have a gym membership and finding the motivation to work out is difficult. I really have no business running around outside during Phoenix summer weather and the area I live in isn't exactly safe, so I'm not exactly comfortable walking around at night. I need to find something constructive to channel my rage and frustration into, I know that. But, *sigh* just finding the motivation to do anything is so arduous. I can barely get the motivation to do things I like, let alone anything constructive. I got a webcam for my birthday, which coincidentally is today. Maybe I can find something creative to do with that.

My family is like oil and I'm water, we simply don't mix. I'm dealing with people just as broken as I am at the very least, simply in different ways.
 
I think anything at that point would have pushed Kevin over the edge, guys. The post in question was fairly harmless.

It was a combination of posts though, not just that single post. And I can understand his frustration when he gets told that he has to get to know people if he isn't particularly attractive, when he specifically said that people refuse to contact him after an initial meeting.
 
Christ, just when you think things are going well something always has to happen. I'm just so frustrated with my family. We are a fucked up bunch, everyone has their own mental issues, but I can't relate to anyone in this fucking house. I almost broke my bedroom door in half, goddammit. This is the anger that I would channel into self-harm behaviors like cutting, I have no idea what to do with this anger. I just want to hurt something, which usually means myself.


Edit: I think the worst has passed, but now I simply feel like garbage. Useless trash.

Working out helps, but I know how you feel in feeling alienated by your own family. =/

How many people work with you? Can you talk to your boss?

I have before, it's a known problem that will never be addressed. Quite a few.
 
It was a combination of posts though, not just that single post. And I can understand his frustration when he gets told that he has to get to know people if he isn't particularly attractive, when he specifically said that people refuse to contact him after an initial meeting.

I apologize if this comes off as indelicate and I know he was valued itt (as well he should be) but Kev needs to get his fucking shit together, not engage in activities which are (1) not essential to his short-term health / survival and (2) feed into his self-harming behaviors. The obvious one being pursuing romantic interaction with women or discussing his lack of success with this on internet message boards.

In the last year he has been kind of 5150'd twice, arrested for making terroristic threats*, and, IIRC, was facing homelessness soon because his friend's mom wanted him out of her house by June. I understand the need for human intimacy and how a lack of it can exacerbate things for people in his situation, but sometimes what you want just isn't mission critical.

*Which was utter bullshit.
 
Hats off to Kevin, hope he somehow manages to get things together and get himself to a happier path here in life.

Btw you're all a bunch of cool cats in here, great little community with nice camraderie. Maybe one day i'll tell my tale or chill in the chat :)
 
Hi all, kinda new to gaf

I was diagnosed with depression/anxiety about five years ago now.
After high school I got into university and just couldn't be bothered anymore, didn't see the point in gettin out of bed or going out with friends. It was very unlike me and people started to notice especially my mum.

So off to the doctor I went... Setraline anti-depressants which gave me horrible nausea and scared the pants off me with an increase in suicidal rate and a healthy dose of coucilling. After constantly increasing my dose and geting me back out into the real world and being more socially acted I started to slowly drop the setraline doses. If you have been on them before, you will know what I'm talking about.

I was going great, completely off the meds and had ceased coucilling when I started to feel the big monster coming back. If you have had him before you just know the feeling. It's horrible!
This time the anxiety was worse! Calling my boyfriend up at work to try to get him to calm me down, also being in hysterics at work. ( I'm a nurse) Not being able to get up and go tk school. This eas not me.
so off I went to the doctors I have been subscribed beta blockers ( I didn't personally want to go back in anti depressants, I hated the way they made me feel) and more coucilling session (I do know where a lot of my anxiety and depression comes from).
It's just been a week on my new meds. Ill let you know how I go.

Just wanted to say its nice knowing I'm not alone and these threads help. Thank you gaf
 
Hi all, kinda new to gaf

I was diagnosed with depression/anxiety about five years ago now.
After high school I got into university and just couldn't be bothered anymore, didn't see the point in gettin out of bed or going out with friends. It was very unlike me and people started to notice especially my mum.

So off to the doctor I went... Setraline anti-depressants which gave me horrible nausea and scared the pants off me with an increase in suicidal rate and a healthy dose of coucilling. After constantly increasing my dose and geting me back out into the real world and being more socially acted I started to slowly drop the setraline doses. If you have been on them before, you will know what I'm talking about.

I was going great, completely off the meds and had ceased coucilling when I started to feel the big monster coming back. If you have had him before you just know the feeling. It's horrible!
This time the anxiety was worse! Calling my boyfriend up at work to try to get him to calm me down, also being in hysterics at work. ( I'm a nurse) Not being able to get up and go tk school. This eas not me.
so off I went to the doctors I have been subscribed beta blockers ( I didn't personally want to go back in anti depressants, I hated the way they made me feel) and more coucilling session (I do know where a lot of my anxiety and depression comes from).
It's just been a week on my new meds. Ill let you know how I go.

Just wanted to say its nice knowing I'm not alone and these threads help. Thank you gaf
Welcome! I have no idea about meds, as I never tried any, but I'm glad to hear they are helping you (or did so in the past).

There's a lot of great people in this thread, most of whom are willing to provide help or a shoulder whenever someone needs it. So much kindness here.
 
Guys, I just wanted to pop in here to say that I won't be around for a while (both in the thread and in the chat). Nothing to worry about, but I need to clear my head for a while. I won't be using the internet for the next couple of weeks outside of checking my e-mail, at least until I get my degree. Really need to focus on that, and internet is proving to be too much of an easy distraction. I'm going to miss the interaction in here, but I think it's time for me to practice interacting irl for a bit. I've had problems with secluding myself in the past, and I have the feeling that (partly due to study-related stress) I'm falling down that hole again. Time for change, time to cut out the internet for a while!

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone in here and in the chat. You guys have made my life a lot easier. Having somewhere to share my most shameful secrets/fears/obsessions was amazingly helpful. You guys are awesome. I know I'm just a random internet guy who made a couple of gibberish-posts in here, but just being able to get the truth about everything I've done wrong out there (even if it is anonymous), and being able to talk to people with similiar issues has done me a world of good. Anyone reading this: if there's one thing you can get out of this thread, it's that you're not alone in feeling like you do, and you're not a bad/weird/crazy person for feeling the way you do. You need to realize that, and focus on what change is needed, and take action to achieve that. It won't come easy, and it will take time. And that's okay. That constant stream of self-hating thoughts won't achieve anything. Sometimes you need to give yourself a break, pick up the pieces, and rebuild your life.


I'll be back some day! I hope I'll be a bit happier/healthier when I do. Take care everyone :).
 
Guys, I just wanted to pop in here to say that I won't be around for a while (both in the thread and in the chat). Nothing to worry about, but I need to clear my head for a while. I won't be using the internet for the next couple of weeks outside of checking my e-mail, at least until I get my degree. Really need to focus on that, and internet is proving to be too much of an easy distraction. I'm going to miss the interaction in here, but I think it's time for me to practice interacting irl for a bit. I've had problems with secluding myself in the past, and I have the feeling that (partly due to study-related stress) I'm falling down that hole again. Time for change, time to cut out the internet for a while!

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone in here and in the chat. You guys have made my life a lot easier. Having somewhere to share my most shameful secrets/fears/obsessions was amazingly helpful. You guys are awesome. I know I'm just a random internet guy who made a couple of gibberish-posts in here, but just being able to get the truth about everything I've done wrong out there (even if it is anonymous), and being able to talk to people with similiar issues has done me a world of good. Anyone reading this: if there's one thing you can get out of this thread, it's that you're not alone in feeling like you do, and you're not a bad/weird/crazy person for feeling the way you do. You need to realize that, and focus on what change is needed, and take action to achieve that. It won't come easy, and it will take time. And that's okay. That constant stream of self-hating thoughts won't achieve anything. Sometimes you need to give yourself a break, pick up the pieces, and rebuild your life.


I'll be back some day! I hope I'll be a bit happier/healthier when I do. Take care everyone :).

Succes met alles!
 
Just got back from therapy, just having someone impartial to talk to is nice, kinda like this thread. Going through a lot of conflicting stuff right now with my family. The mental gymnastics I'm going through feels like its tearing me apart from the inside. I really wish I could be more specific, but I really can't. *sigh* Just need to bear with it for now.

Really looking forward to E3. I hate how I don't really look forward to much in life beyond stupid media shit like games and movies. But hey it's something right?
 
Your situation sounds a lot like what I've been through particularly school stuff. I think it would be a good idea to start therapy. It (almost) never hurts. From there they can tell you if seeing a psychaitrist would be necessary. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk. :)

As for the thread being moved to community, I think there might be more traffic on the subforum than before because of the huge amount of threads that were moved here.

Thanks. I've been feeling better for the last few days. What a weird, rambling post that was... I think for now I should work more on lifestyle changes. The day after that post I went for my first run in over a month and I think I ran harder than ever before, it was pretty intense. Felt a lot better afterwards.
 
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