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GAF, I'm 100% sure I'm getting friendzoned on Monday

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I forgot something.

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I need a userscript to replace the gaf banner with this, someone please.
 
Since we can't speak over here, I just showed her the thread and my post about telling her that my feelings may not change.The following is our exchange on Notepad since he's still right there and I'm sure he's figured out what's up.

OP: This maybe creepy but ain't no one ever gonna care for you like I do

Her: . . . . . I'm sorry ): >: D: >:

OP: Maybe we really should take some time off...see what happens...

Her: Yeah. Maybe there will be someone out there and you will find her

OP: Could u clone yourself?

Her:I wished but yeah. Plenty o' fish in da ocean

I showed her Taylor Swift's You belong With me lyrics at this point.

OP: Sorry that I had to put you thru this.. but I couldn't take it anymore... :(

Her: It's okay. I know that sometimes we have to clear things out in order to move on.

Probably cringe worthy to most of y'all and I guess I fucked up huh? Not sure what I'm supposed to do now, we're all still sitting here.

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Reading this thread made me more uncomfortable than anything written by Larry David, Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant; combined.
 
For those who are curious:

The Shuri Saga is what launched Girl Age. The cliff notes version of it starts as thus:

Shuri meets girl. Says she is hot.

They start dating.

Shuri starts venturing into other threads about guys trying to get girls and saying, "Hey I have a hot girlfriend. The secret to getting a hot girlfriend is being nice!" A lot of posters start running an internal clock in their heads until it explodes.

The explosion happens a few weeks later with a post stating, "So my girlfriend has been hanging out with her sleazy ex-boyfriend a lot lately, should I be worried?" Most posters state, "Yes." Shuri continues to believe in the girlfriend. He continues to fill in details that further confirm the posters suspicions. The saga gets lots of hits around the internet. Becomes top story on Digg.

Turns out she was sleeping with the ex-boyfriend. Shuri is ordered by bishoptl to cut off the relationship. He cuts it off. Rewarded with tag. He attempts to get back with her. Gets new shameful tag. He breaks off with her. Still stuck with shameful tag.

Then goodcow saved this part of the end of the saga:

http://www.goodcowfilms.com/farm/basement/ga-archive/shuri-ex-gf-just-called-01-26-2004.htm

After his saga wound through, lots of other folks posted their own Girl Age threads. Thus, the NEOGAF Girl Age was launched, and the hostility towards "simping" was born.

I love old folk story time!
 
Will the mods please quit trying to be cute by changing the thread titles? The difference between 99% and 100% is huge. One conveys a glimmer of hope, while the other makes this thread sound like futile self-loathing. For what, a little anonymous unfunny bullying?

Will the mods please ban this man? He smells of shit, vinegar, and SALT.
 
I'm still 100% certain this is a troll thread, HOWEVER in the slight chance that it is not and you are being serious...

Other guy and "your" girl are FUCKING right now and laughing about you. While you are sitting around playing GTA V he's fucking the shit out of her and she's going to town on his cock. When they're together without you and the slight chance you enter the conversation they are talking shit about you and laughing at you.

I'll have to sort of stick up for the OP here. There is no way that an Asian girl is going to town on any cock, I'm sorry. Asians are awkward when it comes to sex. They do not "fuck." They do not go down on each other. They're probably also playing video games and giving each other Eskimo kisses.
 
Since we can't speak over here, I just showed her the thread and my post about telling her that my feelings may not change.The following is our exchange on Notepad since he's still right there and I'm sure he's figured out what's up.

OP: This maybe creepy but ain't no one ever gonna care for you like I do

Her: . . . . . I'm sorry ): >: D: >:

OP: Maybe we really should take some time off...see what happens...

Her: Yeah. Maybe there will be someone out there and you will find her

OP: Could u clone yourself?

Her:I wished but yeah. Plenty o' fish in da ocean

I showed her Taylor Swift's You belong With me lyrics at this point.

OP: Sorry that I had to put you thru this.. but I couldn't take it anymore... :(

Her: It's okay. I know that sometimes we have to clear things out in order to move on.

Probably cringe worthy to most of y'all and I guess I fucked up huh? Not sure what I'm supposed to do now, we're all still sitting here.
Moral of the story: there's no such thing as the 'friend zone'.

My God dude...I was wondering why this thread was still going...
 
I'll have to sort of stick up for the OP here. There is no way that an Asian girl is going to town on any cock, I'm sorry. Asians are awkward when it comes to sex. They do not "fuck." They do not go down on each other. They're probably also playing video games and giving each other Eskimo kisses.

Wrong. So wrong. My Asian GF is coming over right now to suck my dick (she loves that, and swallowing too) and loves riding the fuck out of it and getting fucked from behind while screaming into a pillow.

Not awkward at all, let's put it that way. You need to get fucked by an Asian girl so she can suck the lies out of you. Through your dick!
 
Since we can't speak over here, I just showed her the thread and my post about telling her that my feelings may not change.The following is our exchange on Notepad since he's still right there and I'm sure he's figured out what's up.

OP: This maybe creepy but ain't no one ever gonna care for you like I do

Her: . . . . . I'm sorry ): >: D: >:

OP: Maybe we really should take some time off...see what happens...

Her: Yeah. Maybe there will be someone out there and you will find her

OP: Could u clone yourself?

Her:I wished but yeah. Plenty o' fish in da ocean

I showed her Taylor Swift's You belong With me lyrics at this point.

OP: Sorry that I had to put you thru this.. but I couldn't take it anymore... :(

Her: It's okay. I know that sometimes we have to clear things out in order to move on.

Probably cringe worthy to most of y'all and I guess I fucked up huh? Not sure what I'm supposed to do now, we're all still sitting here.


So so fake
 
I'll have to sort of stick up for the OP here. There is no way that an Asian girl is going to town on any cock, I'm sorry. Asians are awkward when it comes to sex. They do not "fuck." They do not go down on each other. They're probably also playing video games and giving each other Eskimo kisses.
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I'll have to sort of stick up for the OP here. There is no way that an Asian girl is going to town on any cock, I'm sorry. Asians are awkward when it comes to sex. They do not "fuck." They do not go down on each other. They're probably also playing video games and giving each other Eskimo kisses.

I beg to differ..I wont be doing fucking Eskimo kisses when I get home!
 
My standard advice for anyone needing help for a specific girl: You're approaching it from the mentality that she's special. She isn't. Don't pay any special attention to one girl. Play the field. Your neediness is in all likelihood very off-putting.
 
I'll have to sort of stick up for the OP here. There is no way that an Asian girl is going to town on any cock, I'm sorry. Asians are awkward when it comes to sex. They do not "fuck." They do not go down on each other. They're probably also playing video games and giving each other Eskimo kisses.

Just because there aren't any Asian girls that would go to town on your cock doesn't mean Asian girls do not suck dick.
 
Different cultures and all that, but it really isn't over here.

Or maybe this is just the exception to the norm. Trust me, it's all good.

I don't think any culture handles playing Taylor Swift songs and humiliating yourself in front of a girl you like, as the norm.
 
I don't think any culture handles playing Taylor Swift songs and humiliating yourself in front of a girl you like, as the norm.
Like I said though, she doesn't care and she and her boyfriend still act the same around me. And although I know I fucked up, I'm ready to put all that shit behind me.

Well with that post you just linked the whole story becomes less sad. Ask the new girl out dude
I've only spoken to her face2face once so would "Hey guess what, I'm gonna have to be in school tomorrow to hand in this document. All my friends have the week off and are chilling back home. You wanna go grab some lunch together?" be alright?
 
Like I said though, she doesn't care and she and her boyfriend still act the same around me. And although I know I fucked up, I'm ready to put all that shit behind me.


I've only spoken to her face2face once so would "Hey guess what, I'm gonna have to be in school tomorrow to hand in this document. All my friends have the week off and are chilling back home. You wanna go grab some lunch together?" be alright?

Why would you mention that about the friends? You're making everything needlessly complicated.
 
You are very indirect.

First you tell her you want her number just to win a bet now you write out this huge rationalization for why you are asking her to lunch.

"Hey, my friends are gone and I have nothing to do, want to go to lunch with me? I'm just asking because my friends are back home, nothing threatening or anything. If they were here I totally wouldn't be asking btw."

It's like you are trying to mask your intentions (which, I'm guessing is you like her). Or like, you are afraid that she will know that you are attracted to her (which she already knows anyways)

Why not just say "Hey, want to get lunch?" and leave it at that.
 
^ precisely. Mentioning that his friends aren't around makes you sound like a loser. And letting her know right off the bat that you're attracted to her is what you want, unless you want to keep getting friendzoned again and again and again.
 
I'll have to sort of stick up for the OP here. There is no way that an Asian girl is going to town on any cock, I'm sorry. Asians are awkward when it comes to sex. They do not "fuck." They do not go down on each other. They're probably also playing video games and giving each other Eskimo kisses.

Lololol

Is this what Asian dudes think about their women? Because as a non-Asian dude who has lived in Asia for half a decade I can tell you that the exact opposite is true.
 
I'll have to sort of stick up for the OP here. There is no way that an Asian girl is going to town on any cock, I'm sorry. Asians are awkward when it comes to sex. They do not "fuck." They do not go down on each other. They're probably also playing video games and giving each other Eskimo kisses.

Nope! "I'm Asian" too...

I'm marreid to a white gal now but I dated many Asians over the years and we fuck and suck like every other race on this planet. Then again I'm American, it may be culturally different in Malaysia, I highly doubt it though...
 
Like I said though, she doesn't care and she and her boyfriend still act the same around me. And although I know I fucked up, I'm ready to put all that shit behind me.


I've only spoken to her face2face once so would "Hey guess what, I'm gonna have to be in school tomorrow to hand in this document. All my friends have the week off and are chilling back home. You wanna go grab some lunch together?" be alright?

NO.
Simple and direct.

"Gotta be in school tomorrow, wanna get lunch?"
 
Well I didn't want to sound like I'm desperate to go out with her. I'm not exactly attracted to her, she's prettier than the other girl and all but I'm still in the process of getting over her. I just want to do this as I'm bored and lonely at home right now and I see an opportunity here to meet someone new.

So I guess I'll just stick to "I'm gonna be in Uni tomorrow cos I gotta hand in this document, wanna grab lunch?"

Edit: Or like the GAFfer above's suggestion?

I know I may be making things needlessly complicated and appear to be needing help every step of the way but after the last few fuck ups I'd rather be safe than sorry.
 
Well I didn't want to sound like I'm desperate to go out with her. I'm not exactly attracted to her, she's prettier than the other girl and all but I'm still in the process of getting over her. I just want to do this as I'm bored and lonely at home right now and I see an opportunity here to meet someone new.

So I guess I'll just stick to "I'm gonna be in Uni tomorrow cos I gotta hand in this document, wanna grab lunch?"

I know I may be making things needlessly complicated and appear to be needing help every step of the way but after the last few fuck ups I'd rather be safe than sorry.

Simple and direct isn't desperate. Desperate is beating around the bush like you're afraid of the answer.
 
So you are still going to stick with the lame rationalization despite everyone telling you not to lol.

You have an amazing proclivity for asking for advice and then ignoring what everyone tells you.

What's the point of asking and being safe instead sorry when you literally never listen to what anyone tells you?
 
So you are still going to stick with the lame rationalization despite everyone telling you not to lol.

You have an amazing proclivity for asking for advice and then ignoring what everyone tells you.

What's the point of asking and being safe instead sorry when you literally never listen to what anyone tells you?

Did you read the part where I've changed my intended text to RiffRaff's suggestion?

Sending it now.
 
You liked his suggestion because it's a shorter version of what you were already going to say.

"Gotta be at school tomorrow".

You are still hell-bent on rationalizing asking her, just now with a fewer words.
 
You liked his suggestion because it's a shorter version of what you were already going to say.

"Gotta be at school tomorrow".

You are still hell-bent on rationalizing asking her, just now with a fewer words.

That whole rationalising part was me responding to a poster.

Edit: Yeah I still told her about the school part, but I think it's simple enough overall.

I put out a suggestion and amended it after feedback off here as well as listening to Devolution's explanation about being simple and direct. How have I not listened to the advice given?
 
Glad to hear you're trying to get out there and do stuff unrelated to the original girl OP.

See, it's not so hard when you've got friends in GAF!

Now all you have to do is have GAF suggestions wired into some headphones so that you'll know what to say while talking to this other girl.

Yes, nothing could possibly go wrong from that... yes....
 
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