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2013-14 NBA Dec |OT| The Nets are the Knicks of Basketball

L

LiveFromKyoto

Member
Herpes Reasons said:
oh hey look.
lakers finally play.
we get another 5 day break in conjunction to a number of injuries.
i want to meet whoever is responsible for scheduling and punch him on the throat
Click to expand...

Whoever is responsible for schedule for the Lakers hands you guys bonus wins every year. They consistently get the cushiest schedule in the league.
 
R

reilo

learning some important life lessons from magical Negroes
@Passionweiss: Vastly would've preferred Kobe's return video to be him and Vanessa re-creating the "Bound 2" video, but you can't always get what you want.
Click to expand...

Konex told me he was hoping Kobe's return video was him and Kobe recreating "Bound 2", but he says you can't always get what you want.
 
N

Ninja Scooter

Member
nike-kobe-9-elite-xl.jpg

Go home, Nike. You're drunk.
 
R

reilo

learning some important life lessons from magical Negroes
Cloudy said:
KOBEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Click to expand...

Dear Kobe, I wrote you but you still ain't callin'
I left my cell, my pager and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not've got em
There probably was a problem at the post office or something
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot em
But anyways, fuck it, what's been up man, how's your daughter...
 
K

Kobe24

Member
KOBEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
 
Dominican Power

Dominican Power

Member
12. BROOKLYN NETS, 5-14
The Good News: I know it's not Thanksgiving anymore, but I'd like to thank the Nets for teaching us some valuable lessons. They taught us that it's dangerous for players to immediately become head coaches, and that coaching an NBA team is much harder than we thought (especially if you don't have a pulse). They taught us that Russian billionaires can't just waltz into the NBA and succeed as owners. They taught us that you can't intentionally spill a drink to get a free timeout, and that all NBA games are filmed by cameras that catch such behavior. They taught us to be careful anytime a rival GM seems overly excited to trade you two of his best players. They taught us not to film a Beats by Dre commercial that insinuates you might be washed up if you might be washed up. They taught us you can get rid of anyone you don't want by "reassigning him" to write daily reports. And they taught us to use better protection — not just when we're having sex with people we don't know, but when we're giving away first-round picks for expensive veterans. So it hasn't been all bad.

The Bad News: For 40 solid years, Gene Simmons's appearance on The Mike Douglas Show held the "Most Awkward/Uncomfortable/Sprawling Train Wreck That Leaves You Absolutely Dumbfounded And Even A Little Slack-Jawed" championship belt.

And then … the first five weeks of the 2013-14 Nets season happened.

Random Thought: Mark Felten from Sterling Heights wonders, "At what point do you stop calling Mikhail Prokhorov 'Mutant Russian Mark Cuban' and start calling him 'Mutant Russian Ted Stepien?'" I think we're there. I'm excited for "The Prokhorov Rule," whatever that ends up being. Four possibilities …

1. "You can't hire a former player as head coach unless he's been out of the league for one calendar year."

2. "If you pay more than $80 million in luxury tax and miss the playoffs while also not having a first-round pick, you have to sell your team within 45 days."

3. "Nobody is ever allowed to hire Billy King as GM again."

4. "If you dump your $6 million assistant coach five weeks into the season and 'reassign' him to writing daily reports, those reports have to be made public every day."

(The last one kills me. How much would you pay to read "The Lawrence Frank Report" every day? I'm in for $500.)

SportVU Revelation: Remember that protecting-the-rim stat from Toronto's section? Only one player has protected the rim better than Hibbert: Brook Lopez. Wait, what???? Brook Lopez?!?!?!?!?!? Opponents shoot only 35.8 percent when he protects the rim. His brother, Robin, comes in at a respectable 43.4 percent. Well done, Mrs. Lopez! Way to teach your kids how to protect the fort!

Worst-Case Scenario: You can't write them off until Deron Williams comes back (he's their only perimeter player who can create a shot) and Andrei Kirilenko comes back (he's their only "dirty work" guy). But it's a painfully slow team that never gets easy baskets. It's a dreadfully coached team — I don't see how that gets better. It's running the Clogged Toilet Offense about as inefficiently as we've ever seen. And Pierce and Garnett have lost a step and a half each when neither of them could afford to lose anything. This is really, really, really bad. There's a reason they keep getting blown out. But the WORST-case scenario? Brooklyn panic-trading Lopez as a last-ditch effort to shake things up over just eating Kidd's contract (and hiring, say, George Karl).

Prognosis: I can't see them winning more than 40 games, which means they'll miss the playoffs … unless the allure of Tankapalooza 2014 sways enough Eastern foes. It's 50/50. Unbelievable! I ranked the Nets seventh heading into the season! Never ever ever ever ever ever saw this coming.
Click to expand...

http://www.grantland.com/blog/the-t...-and-nets-circle-the-drain-at-the-toilet-bowl
 
S

Spooks

Member
Alright Cavs-age. Going to Hawks Cav game tonight(also happens to be my very first basketball game ever). If they get blown out you know who to blame.
 
D

dalVlatko

Member
Spooks said:
Alright Cavs-age. Going to Hawks Cav game tonight(also happens to be my very first basketball game ever). If they get blown out you know who to blame.
Click to expand...

I went to the game against the Wizards where they were losing by 30 at one point so it can't be any worse than that
 
M

Mothman91

Member
Isn't that fucking ironic. The day Porter is able to come back and play, Webster goes down.

Doesn't look good, but one of our commentators said it looks like he twisted his ankle when he was coming down and landed on one of the Bucks players foot.
 
F

Future PhaZe

Member
Mothman91 said:
Isn't that fucking ironic. The day Porter is able to come back and play, Webster goes down.

Doesn't look good, but one of our commentators said it looks like he twisted his ankle when he was coming down and landed on one of the Bucks players foot.
Click to expand...

Straight out of 2k lol
 
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