A warning for you doonscrollers sitting on the porcelain throne

Sitting for prolonged periods is simply bad in general, no?

But damn, they're suggesting a 10 minute time limit on the pot?

I don't think I can comply, Captain. I have certain rituals that I must adhere to. 😆
 
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Eat more fiber and drink more water. ;)
season 2 chocolate with nuts GIF by SpongeBob SquarePants
 
I don't get how people can sit on the toilet for so long and especially use their phone or play on their switch/steam deck.

I want to get my shit done ASAP. And it's fucking disgusting sitting there breathing in poop particles, poop particles going all over your device of choice, and then touching it with your poopy smelling hands. I bet most people don't even bother washing their hands.

I wouldn't want to be near any of your stinky ass phones or handheld consoles. The buttons are probably all crusty with pee drops and poop mushrooms growing out the vents.
 
I don't get how people can sit on the toilet for so long and especially use their phone or play on their switch/steam deck.

I want to get my shit done ASAP. And it's fucking disgusting sitting there breathing in poop particles, poop particles going all over your device of choice, and then touching it with your poopy smelling hands. I bet most people don't even bother washing their hands.

I wouldn't want to be near any of your stinky ass phones or handheld consoles. The buttons are probably all crusty with pee drops and poop mushrooms growing out the vents.
Same man, I honestly find it gross that people use their phones in the bathroom. They have an addiction, man.
 
If you work out and clean your ass with water, none of the issues in the article are relevant if you sit 10 mins or so on the toilet. I always wash my ass after a poop, unless at work ofc, because thats....what every human being should do especially if you have hair down there.
 
This has been sponsored by business owners who have had enough of people spending too long in the bathroom.

Nonsense
 
Shit in bin bags and throw them in the bushes. The neighborhood with think someone's got a large dog, and your ass is hemorrhoid free.
 
How do people spend so much time on the can? I'm in and out.
Eat plenty of fiber, people. The poop just slides out. It's almost a pleasant experience.
 
I don't get how people can sit on the toilet for so long and especially use their phone or play on their switch/steam deck.

I want to get my shit done ASAP. And it's fucking disgusting sitting there breathing in poop particles, poop particles going all over your device of choice, and then touching it with your poopy smelling hands. I bet most people don't even bother washing their hands.

I wouldn't want to be near any of your stinky ass phones or handheld consoles. The buttons are probably all crusty with pee drops and poop mushrooms growing out the vents.
Scared Homer Simpson GIF by reactionseditor
 
I don't get how people can sit on the toilet for so long and especially use their phone or play on their switch/steam deck.

I want to get my shit done ASAP. And it's fucking disgusting sitting there breathing in poop particles, poop particles going all over your device of choice, and then touching it with your poopy smelling hands. I bet most people don't even bother washing their hands.

I wouldn't want to be near any of your stinky ass phones or handheld consoles. The buttons are probably all crusty with pee drops and poop mushrooms growing out the vents.
I can assure you my friend that the fecal matter fairy visits us all, regardless of our cleanliness habbits.

z8xruCF.jpeg
 
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Do you use a fresh sponge every time, or use the same one for awhile?
I clean the sponge after every use with hot water and soap, and change it after a while,

People cleaning their asses after taking a shit is such an alien concept or what? :lollipop_squinting:
 
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You need a new one after every use!

no man GIF
Do you need a new pair of hands everytime your fingers inevitably touch your shit when you use toilette paper? No because you clean them with water and soap.

My shit sponge is probably cleaner than some asses over here :lollipop_squinting:
 
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I had a friend who would routinely sit and read for up to an hour on the toilet in elementary school. He must have horrible hemorrhoids.
 
Get yourself a decent bidet bro - give that bullet hole a proper douche every time.
I have a bidet and i also use a sponge, do you people use your fucking fingers or just the water stream to clean your butthole when you use a bidet and have the audacity of calling other people out?? :lollipop_squinting:

i know we are joking but still :lollipop_squinting:
 
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Yeah in a family of five in a small house the porcelain throne was the only place I could get some peace.
It is scientifically proven that the brain absorb more info when you read something while on the throne.

People only use 20% of their brain when they are not taking a shit.
 
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