Support NeoGAF

[Sub_Level]

$35 on Amazon.

Thirty five dollars that will change your life. Hate to break it to you, but wiping will not clean your anus. The bidet provides the moisture and even a little pressure needed to clean the area. It also saves money on toilet paper since you'll use less than you otherwise would. And of course save you tons from having to buy "flushable" wet wipes.

Common misconceptions:

- The water is too cold especially in the winter. Not really. Its room temperature like your toilet. Same water source.
- The pressure is too high. Nope. You can easily adjust it so only a light stream comes out. Doesn't hurt a single bit.
- Hard to install. You can install a bidet in 30 minutes or less. You just connect a T to your toilet's water hose, and screw the bidet in between your toilet seat & the toilet itself.

We won't move to the metric system. We won't move to celsius. But dammit I'm telling you guys the foreigners have it right when it comes to bidets. Make the transition.

 

[Cunth]

no. *laughs in skidmarks*

 

[FunkMiller]

Everyone in Europe looking at you calling that a bidet.

 

[FunkMiller]

no. *laughs in skidmarks*

You're Australian. Bidets are illegal in Australia.

 

[Rival]

I'd totally buy one

 

[GeorgPrime]

I'd totally buy one but have yet to find one with an acceptable maximum pressure level.

Buy the "Resetera Edition". It will stick something up your ass before cleaning it.

 

[FreedomOfSpeech]

The true solution is to cultivate a pink sock that just folds back inside after the fact.

 

[Calcium]

It's easier to just spend more on flushable wipes. I'm old and I don't like change.

 

[teezzy]

Ew, no. Not squirting water there. Exit only please.

Who am I - brap ?

 

[The New Guy]

Ew, no. Not squirting water there. Exit only please.

Who am I - brap ?

I'd totally get one if I wasn't poor and stuff.

 

[teezzy]

I'd totally get one if I wasn't poor and stuff.

 

[Deleted member 801069]

sounds a little gay tbh

 

[Elcid]

I just wipe then shower.

 

[ipukespiders]

No.
Toilet paper works fine. A little dab of water on it if need be.

 

[Rival]

Buy the "Resetera Edition". It will stick something up your ass before cleaning it.

If this

 

[Riven326]

$35 on Amazon.
Thirty five dollars that will change your life. Hate to break it to you, but wiping will not clean your anus. The bidet provides the moisture and even a little pressure needed to clean the area. It also saves money on toilet paper since you'll use less than you otherwise would. And of course save you tons from having to buy "flushable" wet wipes.

Common misconceptions:

- The water is too cold especially in the winter. Not really. Its room temperature like your toilet. Same water source.
- The pressure is too high. Nope. You can easily adjust it so only a light stream comes out. Doesn't hurt a single bit.
- Hard to install. You can install a bidet in 30 minutes or less. You just connect a T to your toilet's water hose, and screw the bidet in between your toilet seat & the toilet itself.

We won't move to the metric system. We won't move to celsius. But dammit I'm telling you guys the foreigners have it right when it comes to bidets. Make the transition.

 

[amc]

I wipe my arse with a few sheets of luxury soft triple quilted then finish off with fresh scented flushable aloe vera moist wipes.

None of this namby pamby bidet shite. Oh..

 

[888]

Yeah I'm considering it myself.

 

[ManofOne]

Water is luxary resource now haven't you heard. I can only afford gold paper now.

 

[iconmaster]

You can install a bidet in 30 minutes or less. You just connect a T to your toilet's water hose, and screw the bidet in between your toilet seat & the toilet itself.

Just because I play Mario games it don't make me a plumber.

 

[amc]

But seriously, if you're worried about just using dry toilet paper then just finish with a flushable wet wipe. Lovely clean bum and none of this French water jet anal intrusion nonsense.

 

[Deleted member 1159]

I want the full on Japanese experience. Heated seat, lid that opens up automatically when you go in the bathroom, heated bidet water, little jingle that plays as white noise...in the meantime I'll just keep downing large amounts of coffee in the morning so I can empty out before my shower.

 

[DESTROYA]

And walk around with swamp ass all day, no fucking thanks.
Don't you still use toilet paper to whip the water from your ass anyway ?

 

[levyjl1988]

No need for a bidet. Here's an alternative method.

1. Fill tabo with water.
2. Shit.
3. Put on gloves.

4. Wipe until all the brown is gone with toilet paper.
5. Put liquid soap on gloves.
6. Pour Tabo while washing your ass.

7. Throw away disposable gloves.
8. Dry ass with towel.
9. Wash hands.
10. Enjoy clean ass.

No need for a bidet or the need to do it the white people way.

White people way of shitting is shit, wipe until there is no brown and walk away. White people way is disgusting.

 

[DESTROYA]

No need for a bidet. Here's an alternative method.

1. Fill tabo with water.
2. Shit.
3. Put on gloves.

4. Wipe until all the brown is gone with toilet paper.
5. Put liquid soap on gloves.
6. Pour Tabo while washing your ass.

7. Throw away disposable gloves.
8. Dry ass with towel.
9. Wash hands.
10. Enjoy clean ass.

No need for a bidet or the need to do it the white people way.

White people way of shitting is shit, wipe until there is no brown and walk away. White people way is disgusting.

By the time you do all those steps you probably have to take another shit

 

[GeorgPrime]

By the time you do all those steps you probably have to take another shit

Or the shit already air dried so you dont have to do it anymore

 

[M3Freak]

No need for a bidet. Here's an alternative method.

1. Fill tabo with water.

You or your ancestors are from the philipines, correct?

 

[Punished Miku]

No.
Toilet paper works fine. A little dab of water on it if need be.

I don't shower either honestly. I just get some wadded up paper and rub it all over my body.

 

[Pagusas]

do they have heated ones? No way would i want to get sprayed with cold water.

 

[ipukespiders]

I don't shower either honestly. I just get some wadded up paper and rub it all over my body.

Nice!

 

[Punished Miku]

do they have heated ones? No way would i want to get sprayed with cold water.

You can get the super nice ones with everything. Same as the Japanese toilets. Personally, I think it's way more worth it to just get a nice one. They had black Friday deals.

 

[ipukespiders]

How does a blind person know when to stop wiping?

Spoiler

They taste blood.

 

[CrapSandwich]

The kind of water pressure required to clean things would destroy your butthole. That's why you need detergent and friction, which is exactly what you get with a wet wipe. Bidets only provide a light rinse. Like if you had poo on your hand, would you just give it a little rinse? Or would go for a wipe that allows you actually remove everything and cleans with detergent?

 

[DavidGzz]

I take a shower before the wife eats my ass, no need to get unpleasantly squirted twice a day.

 

[DrJohnGalt]

I bought one a few years ago wish I would have done it sooner. It took me about 10 minutes to install (and I'm not only lazy, I'm an idiot when it comes to home improvement stuff). The water is a bit cold, but it's cold in a pleasant way, like a nice walk on a fall morning. My only complaint is having to wait a few extra minutes to drip dry. But hey, when all the crying luddites were begging for toilet paper earlier this year I laughed so hard I cried. Then dried my tears with my last roll of shit tickets while they watched.

 

[Coolwhhip]

Just shower bro.

 

[levyjl1988]

You or your ancestors are from the philipines, correct?

Bingo!

 

[Fuz]

Disgusting savages.

 

[Tschumi]

I also thought you were talking about the porcelain half toilets. 30 minute installation laawl..

I have a Japanese bidet hose in my toilet.. i hate it, because it makes the first few wipes of tp sodden and, just, nasty.

 

[Foamy]

If my wife went to wash my underwear and didn't find skid marks she'd think I was cheating on her.

 

[GoodFriend]

am I able to install it in an apartment

 

[SLoWMoTIoN]

It's easier to just spend more on flushable wipes. I'm old and I don't like change.

What calcium vitamins do you take?

 

[BigBooper]

Is this for sex?

 

[haxan7]

Is this for sex?

I think the gays use them

 

[Kamina]

This is a bidet my dude

 

[DeadMansParty]

I have a toto bidet, completely worth it. Has a warm water function and seat warmer. Can't imagine not having it. Seriously, if you can spend the money it's well worth it. The most basic model is good enough to me. I used them in Japan, and going back to a traditional way is just impossible. I hate not having a bidet. It just feels like I am not clean.

 

[diffusionx]

Bidets are absolutely necessary as far as I am concerned

 

[GymWolf]

Mom can we buy a bidet this year?

But timmy you already have bidet at home.

The bidet at home

 

[Rentahamster]

It's easier to just spend more on flushable wipes. I'm old and I don't like change.

Show me a man who refuses to evolve to a washlet and I'll show you a man who still enjoys indirectly touching his anus with dead trees.

 

[Men_in_Boxes]

Seems unnecessary.