ECW - Hardcore TV, Episode #001 - April 4th, 1993
The inaugral episode of ECW's Hardcore TV kicks off with a snazzy intro video;
ECW Hardcore TV 1993 Intro
'Hot Stuff' Eddie Gilbert has the book and, while Paul E. is kicking around, helping out some of the wrestlers with their promos, he's not an on-screen persona at this point. After the intro we're introduced to our commentary team, Stevie Wonderful & Jay Sulli;
They bring out Todd Gordon, who has a belt in his hands. "Let me ask you a question. I see you here, holding the brand new ECW Television Heavyweight Wrestling Champion" stumbles Wonderful. That wasn't a question, Stevie. Gordon explains that this is the new ECW Television Championship and that there'll be a tournament to crown the first champion, kicking off here tonight! Before we take things to the ring, Gordon has a surprise - there's going to be a 3rd man in the commentary booth! He says this man is a "Living legend", at which point Eddie Gilbert comes out and begins to thank Todd for making him a commentator, but Gordon interrupts him and directs him towards a monitor so we can see "the real 3rd man in the booth!"
We're then treated to a clip of Quantum Leap and the fine acting skills of Terry Funk, as his character is beat up by Dr. Sam Beckett. Back to the arena and Gilbert still seems oblivious, but goes into a rage when the Funker arrives. "You and these stinkin' people want to call him a legend? To me a legend's just an old man!" screams Gilbert. Funk immediately challenges him to a match, but says Gilbert better be careful "this old man doesn't embarrass you", so Gilbert high-tails it to the back. Funk puts over the hardcore wrestling fans, the Philly area and the locker-room, before throwing the show to commercial.
The Super Destroyers (c) vs The Hell Riders (E.Z. Ryder & H.D. Ryder) - ECW World Heavyweight Tag Team Title
The Hell Riders try and get the jump on The Super Destroyers, which probably isn't a good idea. E.Z. Ryder was better known as Chubby Dudley. No idea who H.D. Ryder is. The Super D's make a near-instant comeback, taking it to H.D, making quick tags while Funk & Wonderful argue over which Destroyer is which. Eventually, The D's just throw H.D. into his own corner and he tags in E.Z. The Super Destroyers make equally short work of him and hit a powerbomb, followed by a jumping senton for the 3-count before the other Rider can make the save.
At ringside, the manager of The Super Destroyers (Hunter Q. Robins the 3rd) demands proper respect from Terry Funk, who calls him "Hunter Q. Robins the TURD" before introducing a TOTALLY RADICAL video package for The Sandman;
The Sandman, circa 1993
Back from commercial, and Stevie Wonderful & Jay Sulli announce the brackets for the TV Title Tournament;
'Ironman' Tommy Cairo vs 'Wildman' Sal Bellomo - TV Title Tournament, Round 1 Match
The Wildman Sal Bellomo and his manager The Cosmic Commander are certainly a sight;
Tommy Cairo gets a good reaction from the crowd, as Terry Funk puts him and his undefeated streak over on commentary before going ringside to put him over some more to the live audience. Cairo & Bellomo lock up and Cairo hits an armdrag with ease. Bellomo gets frustrated and grabs a hammerlock before slamming Cairo down to the mat. He works over Cairo's arm well, but Tommy manages to force him into a corner and scores with some big punches. He tries to charge the corner, but eats a big boot for his trouble for a 2-count. Bellomo continues to work over the arm, but Cairo eventually breaks free and hits a crossbody off the ropes for a 2-count of his own. The Cosmic Commander gets on the apron and distracts the ref, while Bellomo locks in a full-nelson. Out of nowhere, Johnny Hotbody runs down and goes to hit a flying knee off the top rope on Tommy, but he breaks free and Hotbody hits Bellomo instead, sending him outside the ring. The ref eventually notices and counts Bellomo out, giving Cairo the win! Johnny Hotbody attacks him post-match and tries for a top-rope elbow, but crashes and burns, running from ringside before Cairo can get his hands on him.
Tony 'Hitman' Stetson vs Rockin' Rebel
BATTLE OF THE MULLETS! Stetson looks like the 1-2-3 Kid after a year long McDonalds binge, but while his mullet is quite luxuriant, it isn't as magnificent as the Rockin' Rebel's, who is the no.1 contender for the ECW Heavyweight Title (the Rockin' Rebel, not his mullet). Stetson hits some nice armdrags to start things off and Rebel's complaining to the ref about having his hair pulled and Stetson kicking him up the ass. They lock up and Stetson hits another armdrag, before working over the arm. Rebel works his way to his feet and hits Stetson HARD into the turnbuckle to gain the advantage. He methodically picks Stetson apart, hitting a nice dropkick for a 2-count. Rebel telegraphs a back bodydrop and Stetson hits a nice neckbreaker before scoring with a legdrop off the top rope for 2. Stetson charges Rebel in the corner, but he trips Tony and rolls him up with his feet on the ropes for the 3-count! Jay Sulli interviews the Rebel post-match and he says he's putting Sandman on notice, "the best wrestler in ECW doesn't wear a belt, but he will do soon. I'm coming for your title, Sandman, and your career".
'Superfly' Jimmy Snuka vs Larry Winters - TV Title Tournament, Round 1 Match
Larry Winters gets a total jobber entrance, isn't even introduced. The Superfly comes out and drags Jay Sulli to ringside so he can announce he's signed a contract with a new representative. Out comes 'Hot Stuff' Eddie Gilbert, who says Snuka's the first acquisition of 'Hot Stuff International' and that Snuka's going to be the next TV champion. Funk puts over Snuka's wrestling skill, but says he doesn't like the man before running down Eddie Gilbert, "he's a rat and I have no respect for him". Snuka takes easy control of the match, Gilbert taking every opportunity to attack Winters behind the ref's back. Snuka's showing a total lack of respect towards Winters, but is surprised by a flurry of punches and a big crossbody off the ropes for 2. He scores with successive back bodydrops on Snuka, punches Gilbert in the face and hits a legdrop for another 2-count, but when he hits the ropes again, this time Gilbert trips him. Superfly goes up top and hits a BIG fat gut splash on Winters, pinning him with a lazy count for the 3!
Gilbert celebrates with Snuka post-match. Isn't he meant to be in this tournament, too? He'll have to hope he doesn't meet his new 'acquisition' in the finals.
After the break there's some jobber in the ring while Terry & Sulli close up the show. Terry says there's "room for improvement" and promises the fans that ECW will do just that, before he's interrupted by Sal Bellomo and The Cosmic Commander. Funk tries to tell him he's lost already, but he runs into the ring and destroys the jobber anyway. Todd Gordon is interviewed by Terry, hyping up the last quarter finals of the TV Title Tournament next week and in the TV début of ECW Heavyweight Champion The Sandman! We close the show with some more clips of Terry Funk's awesome acting skills. Not a terribly auspicious start for ECW, but Tommy Cairo looked great in his match. It's just four or so months before Gilbert is fired and Paul E. takes over the book, but hopefully things pick up before then.