Widdle Puppy
Banned
This is the most Kentucky thing ever
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Barge-Size Noahs Ark Is a Creationists Wet Dream
- Thread starter Dalek
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Rentahamster
Rodent Whores
Almighty God didn't get a degree in marketing and business management, apparently.
Chmpocalypse
Blizzard
Dreams-Visions
Member
ZOOM IN ON THE KIDS FACE
There is so much wrong to unpack here. I don't even know where to begin.
Like fuck it, we're gonna just make this shit up as we go along. Let's just do it and be legends, man.
God Dayumm
Banned
I would go too.
Vital Tundra
Member
There is something just so hilarious and pathetic about people believing that shit would have been possible to build.
Ether_Snake
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I like how some creationists, instead of saying the dinosaurs never existed and such, they accept them, but just add them to the ark. If there were aliens landing tomorrow, they'd make some bullshit claim about them too.
Nope. Pigs are still around.
Where is the line drawn between one matter of foolishness and another when it comes to 100 million dollar monuments of ignorance?
PhantomThief
Banned
Religious people usually don't think things through, sorry to say. They believe one thing and shall not deviate!
ClayKavalier
Banned
You can exchange money for goods and services.
It takes a lot of manpower and engineering to place that Dippin Dots machine!
UnluckyKate
Member
The ark is solvent if offered as a venue for galas, art exhibits and raves.
That's an EDM festival just waiting to happen.
They gave Noah's ark a bulbous bow ? That's an early 20th century engineered hydrodynamic feature, best case scenario, late 19th.
But nope, Noah got all figured it out long before everybody else, he was the original true master ship build after all
Frozenprince
Banned
I mean, whoever thought a $100M tourist trap designed for a niche ass group of people would actually make money, well first I question how they got $100M, and second probably should have their business degree revoked.
Well, let's hope the Internet isn't regulated by corporations by the time they come of age
I'm being optimistic here. The Internet could be a poor man's college education if they're genetically predisposed towards being convinced by logic
They don't use science to observe and learn, they find elements of science that will reaffirm their own beliefs.
Like, what's the fucking point of using scientific research when you already know what you're trying to find
BladeoftheImmortal
Member
Problem is it doesn't have rides. For 100 million they could have had at two roller coasters. Theme that shit around a small replica arc. Water rapids ride that shows you how dinosaurs and humans lived together before the flood. Then culminates in a huge drop that brings you to the arc. baby, you got yourself a winner.
Instead it's a 100 million dollar non-floating boring piece of human hubris. Checkmate atheists.
Instead it's a 100 million dollar non-floating boring piece of human hubris. Checkmate atheists.
Amazing
Elwood Blues
Member
Everybody knows that dinosaur bones were really placed on Earth by the devil to trick people into not believing in God.
KeyBladerXIII
Member
That reminds me, is that Bibleland in Orlando still around? I remember seeing brochures for it last time I was there.
TheOctodad
Member
So. I grew up believing this shit and hate it now.
But here's the thing, as a kind of fantasy thing it's kind of badass.
Can we start a church or Game of Thrones and build giant replicas? I mean, purely from that perspective these things are awesome.
But here's the thing, as a kind of fantasy thing it's kind of badass.
Can we start a church or Game of Thrones and build giant replicas? I mean, purely from that perspective these things are awesome.
Huw_Dawson
Member
This is a hilariously stupid waste of money. Even if you take the bible as literal, the core dude you are supposedly repping is asking you to go live humble lives in service to your community, not blow a hundred million dollars on what is essentially a temple.
I mean, it would take a shitton of money and construction crews to replicate the Great Pyramids as well, and a lot of heavy equipment to build Stonehenge as well, that doesn't mean they didn't exist and weren't built years before modern construction equipment. Given time and dedication and a lot of dudes with low pay requirements and questionable safety standards, you can get an amazing amount of stuff done.
Of course, as pointed out the design of the Ark is an anachronism, but considering it's got dinosaurs in it hoping for a reasonably accurate replica according to known archeological data was hoping for a bit much.
The actual history behind the deluge stories in various world cultures is still really interesting, especially now with modern climate science suggesting how much really could have happened to impress people for thousands of years after the fact.
(Also, props to the author of the Pathos article for not succumbing to the stereotype and going all in on Ham. He might deserve the derision, as do the politicians who gave public money to this boondoggle, but acting like an actual journalistic outlet is appreciated.)
(Also, it's sad these townspeople thought the Ark would solve their problem of the interstate. Has there been any small cities or towns that have managed to reverse the death sentence of getting bypassed by major roadways?)
SpartanN92
Banned
I live in Kentucky and me and my family went.
We are a Christian family and we had a great time! I'm sure this will be met with derision here on Garf but it was a spiritually enlightening place.
It's basically a museum of the Bible not just Noah's Ark. There is also a small Zoo. We rode on Camels.
They even have a zip line course. It's good family fun!
I hope it spreads the message to as many people as possible.
We are a Christian family and we had a great time! I'm sure this will be met with derision here on Garf but it was a spiritually enlightening place.
It's basically a museum of the Bible not just Noah's Ark. There is also a small Zoo. We rode on Camels.
They even have a zip line course. It's good family fun!
I hope it spreads the message to as many people as possible.
CornBurrito
Member
What message? Creation?
Nice. And that's all that matters. Spending time with the family going somewhere that holds values in what you believe.
1. He's trolling.
2. Hopefully some kids will realize that even an ark of this size still couldn't hold even a tiny fraction of all the land animals on earth, especially if you want to include dinosaurs. Some of the largest sauropods were f'n huge and very heavy.
oh no
Beren the Empty-Handed
Member
Give me a minute I think I can whip one up.
List of animals on Ark:
- Dinosaurs
- Monkeys (who do not evolve)
- Doves
- Dogs
- Cats
- Lions
- Camels
- Flamingos
- Donald and Daisy Duck
- Giraffes
- Elephants
- Unicorns
- 600 year old man and his family
- Horses
So we multiply all of that by 2 (except the humans and Mr. and Mrs. Duck) and that's 26 animals plus some ship-building senior citizens. That's totally doable.
I haven't been there, but I'm confident that's the representation. Will wait for someone to confirm.
PHOENIXZERO
Member
Poor Ken Ham, Ray "Banana Man" Comfort and the rest of those conmen peddling creationism/intelligent design horseshit.
There's a lot of Evangelicals out there.
There's a lot of Evangelicals out there.
Glad you had a good time and all, but the real important thing is that "Garf" is a great derogatory name for GAF
SolicitorPirate
Member
Wait. There are live camels and zip lines in this thing??
Dude. Its the length of a football field. That's a lot of multi-level space to fill. That thing could still probably be a home to restaurants, theaters, and other commerce.
Here's the thing. They're needing to plan, finance, and develop expansion for this thing. They have a very unique spectacle, that they could capitalize on if they utilize it right.
For instance:
PLEASE tell me there's a place of worship there. You get a decent evangelist and some good networking, with the hook of broadcasting from The Ark? You'd easily amass a huge congregation, both in person and online.
A planner for events to be held there. I'm sure that there would be many who would love to get married on the Ark. I'm sure there's many churches that would love to take field trips there. Private christian schools would love to use it as a learning tool.
I dunno, I see huge potential for a structure like that for the christian community. And I say that as someone who isn't religious.
the_darkness
Banned
The pyramids tho
Astral Dog
Member
Aww very cool
BudokaiMR2
Member
While I honestly think most creationists can get fucked and this thing is a complete waste of funds, I gotta admit that's a pretty fucked up way to label the park. I'm still laughing, but wow.....
WiiredShawn
Member
You're telling me.
I should've listened to that State Farm billboard I saw one day that said "Get to a Better State." It was a goddamn warning.
Seriously, Kentucky is going to slide backwards into its own oblivion and its people will have nothing to blame but themselves.
Hey, if he can create starlight in transit 6000 years ago to trick us, burying some dinosaur bones is child's play.
How is it possible to gather 2 of every animal, keep them on a boat big enough for all of them, and their food, for 40 days, without eating each other or getting sick and dying? How to then redistribute across the globe and repopulate the earth?
Answer to these questions, invariably, is "the power of God."
To which I say, "Then what do you need a fucking boat for?"
Answer to these questions, invariably, is "the power of God."
To which I say, "Then what do you need a fucking boat for?"
Well, it is a park effectively celebrating God's act of drowning every man, woman, child, and baby on the planet except for Noah's family for "reasons".
The story is founded in a genocidal act and results in incest, so...
So there is a God....
..mysterious ways...
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