Agave
Member
Ever since the incident, I've been worried about myself. Another one down the drain, another cycle on the way, but for how much longer will I stay? It's been years now since I started this weird journey, but the older I get, the more I desire to seek some conclusion to it all, but how can I? When everything I've destroyed and everything I've created oughta creep up on me for an indefinite time, and no resolution to any of them, reminding me every day that I need to come back. I'm too sicken to see who I was, but I'm too scared to see what lies ahead, knowing what waits past each door might finally strip away the only things left that feel like mine. Maybe revisiting what I can remember might clear things up, I mean, after all, this still matters to me, the friends, the family, my many, many lives, through the internet. With each fragment of memory, I can try and face each one of them, see where this truly builds up to the present. It's been a while since I've pieced together what my story was like.
(Sorry for posting it here, I hope you guys don't mind, there's like only 4 forums here and I figured this would be the best choice-)
BootThunder:
I wanna start simple, and something a little funny. He's one of the first friends I made when I first entered my old site. We were on the same development team, invited by another friend of ours to help create a game for Mario Odyssey. I don't think he did anything; he kinda just did his own art in the corner, but it was cool either way. His OC's name is Jimmy, which I think was cute. How we became friends is something I don't remember. I think he followed me one day, and I followed him back, and voila, we're friends!! Interpret it how you want, but we've always been on good terms since he would like my art, and I would like his, simple as that. Any notable conversations we had? Well that's what's special about BootThunder, his thing was that he did not talk, like at all, for the few years he and I have been friends, our way of interaction was just liking each others art, simple as that, and I imagined it meant a lot to him like it did to me since if I remember correctly, we were usually the first people to see each other's new uploads. The reason he didn't talk was due to the fact that his account was restricted by parental controls. There were days when I wondered how cool it would be to talk to him, but it would be a very long wait til I get that moment.
2023:
A few years went by and everything just happened out of the blue. There I was just drawing, or doing whatever, living casually in my old home when I received a notification of someone following me, someone familiar. It's BootThunder!! But he has an alt now?? Whoa, I don't know why he needed one. Maybe something happened to his account, or he lost his password? He's not the most active user out there, so there was a possibility, but I checked his account to see what he's cooking up and OH MY GOSH IT'S NOT A RESTRICTED ACCOUNT. I quickly checked his wall posts (status) and saw if he posted anything, and lo and behold, his first words on the site, EVER.
"Hi"
My first response, "FIRST WORDS"
It was the craziest conversation I have ever experienced in a long time.
Then his second words in his next status update.
"I gotta change my pfp"
He never did change his pfp.
Then the next AWESOME thing he did was having a decently long conversation with another friend of ours, Lundwig (who will get his own story along the road)
I ain't gonna share it since it's their business, not mine, but it was wholesome either way.
There was one notable thing I needed to bring up from that convo. Apparently, all this time. From the silent interactions he and I and the rest of the community have for years, he DID NOT KNOW THAT HIS ACCOUNT WAS RESTRICTED, AND JUST "fixed it" LIKE HE SAID
And now, years of seeing his main account private now came back up and fixed into a normal account with statuses and being able to chat, is like fucking whiplash to me!!. What a day that was oh my gosh. I have no idea why he didn't realize this after so long. It's like you think eventually he or the other person would've tried to start some small talk, but nope.
Our next and . . unfortunately final conversation was around a few weeks later, where he @ me in his wall post, suggesting an idea for our Mario Odyssey project, in which all the members would put their OC next to their names in the credits, which I said it was a good idea and he would begin working on it. He even made a drawing for all of us to edit our OC's in it, but um . . I don't think anyone did, sadly- the group was dying by that time, and people were moving on, but it was still sweet that he cared so much about the group that he would do this for us. For talking so little, he has a big heart.
After that, things went normal, somewhat. Even with the account unrestricted, BootThunder wouldn't speak much at all; in fact, he wouldn't even be active much, days would go by without him uploading anything, and that's when one day it came to the worst possible situation.
"I've been gone from q̶̧̡͕̗̬͍͎͖́̌͝x̸̡̙̻̠̦͑͊̅̅̓͠͝ͅĮ̶̪̘͖̬̀̉͒͊͆͋̽̊͒͝L̷̟̘̄̋̆a̴̡̋̋́͐̚̕b̸̢͚̳̣͛̓ṭ̵͊̑̈̕͝ for a couple of months because of school and personal things, and when I get the chance to be on here I have nothing to draw and just do something else. Maybe if something really cool comes to mind and I could draw and canvas of sprites I could come back, but, it dosen't really seem like it. For now, Goodbye."
I was sad, but I kept my head up because I know he would return one day. He's a good friend, a great one even, because despite the silence, he contributed so much in my everyday life back then, just seeing him was a vibe. He didn't need some complex lore, or pizzaz, he was simply a person who you would get along with so easily, and he just always be there by your side, supporting you no matter what. He didn't need to say it, because he knew, and I knew we both appreciated each other's company.
My last words to him before he left.
"Oi BootThunder. Remember this, 1. Me and a lot of people will always care about you and we're glad you're still doing well and 2. Always know that
Some day you'll find it, the Rainbow Connection, the lovers, the dreamers and yoooooooou "
(I was a Muppet fan back then)
Of course, a few months later, HE CAME BACK, but he would never speak again, like what he was back then, but that's fine, as long as he was okay, that's all that mattered.
1/25
(Sorry for posting it here, I hope you guys don't mind, there's like only 4 forums here and I figured this would be the best choice-)
BootThunder:
I wanna start simple, and something a little funny. He's one of the first friends I made when I first entered my old site. We were on the same development team, invited by another friend of ours to help create a game for Mario Odyssey. I don't think he did anything; he kinda just did his own art in the corner, but it was cool either way. His OC's name is Jimmy, which I think was cute. How we became friends is something I don't remember. I think he followed me one day, and I followed him back, and voila, we're friends!! Interpret it how you want, but we've always been on good terms since he would like my art, and I would like his, simple as that. Any notable conversations we had? Well that's what's special about BootThunder, his thing was that he did not talk, like at all, for the few years he and I have been friends, our way of interaction was just liking each others art, simple as that, and I imagined it meant a lot to him like it did to me since if I remember correctly, we were usually the first people to see each other's new uploads. The reason he didn't talk was due to the fact that his account was restricted by parental controls. There were days when I wondered how cool it would be to talk to him, but it would be a very long wait til I get that moment.
2023:
A few years went by and everything just happened out of the blue. There I was just drawing, or doing whatever, living casually in my old home when I received a notification of someone following me, someone familiar. It's BootThunder!! But he has an alt now?? Whoa, I don't know why he needed one. Maybe something happened to his account, or he lost his password? He's not the most active user out there, so there was a possibility, but I checked his account to see what he's cooking up and OH MY GOSH IT'S NOT A RESTRICTED ACCOUNT. I quickly checked his wall posts (status) and saw if he posted anything, and lo and behold, his first words on the site, EVER.
"Hi"
My first response, "FIRST WORDS"
It was the craziest conversation I have ever experienced in a long time.
Then his second words in his next status update.
"I gotta change my pfp"
He never did change his pfp.
Then the next AWESOME thing he did was having a decently long conversation with another friend of ours, Lundwig (who will get his own story along the road)
I ain't gonna share it since it's their business, not mine, but it was wholesome either way.
There was one notable thing I needed to bring up from that convo. Apparently, all this time. From the silent interactions he and I and the rest of the community have for years, he DID NOT KNOW THAT HIS ACCOUNT WAS RESTRICTED, AND JUST "fixed it" LIKE HE SAID
And now, years of seeing his main account private now came back up and fixed into a normal account with statuses and being able to chat, is like fucking whiplash to me!!. What a day that was oh my gosh. I have no idea why he didn't realize this after so long. It's like you think eventually he or the other person would've tried to start some small talk, but nope.
Our next and . . unfortunately final conversation was around a few weeks later, where he @ me in his wall post, suggesting an idea for our Mario Odyssey project, in which all the members would put their OC next to their names in the credits, which I said it was a good idea and he would begin working on it. He even made a drawing for all of us to edit our OC's in it, but um . . I don't think anyone did, sadly- the group was dying by that time, and people were moving on, but it was still sweet that he cared so much about the group that he would do this for us. For talking so little, he has a big heart.
After that, things went normal, somewhat. Even with the account unrestricted, BootThunder wouldn't speak much at all; in fact, he wouldn't even be active much, days would go by without him uploading anything, and that's when one day it came to the worst possible situation.
"I've been gone from q̶̧̡͕̗̬͍͎͖́̌͝x̸̡̙̻̠̦͑͊̅̅̓͠͝ͅĮ̶̪̘͖̬̀̉͒͊͆͋̽̊͒͝L̷̟̘̄̋̆a̴̡̋̋́͐̚̕b̸̢͚̳̣͛̓ṭ̵͊̑̈̕͝ for a couple of months because of school and personal things, and when I get the chance to be on here I have nothing to draw and just do something else. Maybe if something really cool comes to mind and I could draw and canvas of sprites I could come back, but, it dosen't really seem like it. For now, Goodbye."
I was sad, but I kept my head up because I know he would return one day. He's a good friend, a great one even, because despite the silence, he contributed so much in my everyday life back then, just seeing him was a vibe. He didn't need some complex lore, or pizzaz, he was simply a person who you would get along with so easily, and he just always be there by your side, supporting you no matter what. He didn't need to say it, because he knew, and I knew we both appreciated each other's company.
My last words to him before he left.
"Oi BootThunder. Remember this, 1. Me and a lot of people will always care about you and we're glad you're still doing well and 2. Always know that
Some day you'll find it, the Rainbow Connection, the lovers, the dreamers and yoooooooou "(I was a Muppet fan back then)
Of course, a few months later, HE CAME BACK, but he would never speak again, like what he was back then, but that's fine, as long as he was okay, that's all that mattered.
1/25
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