Ironic then, that churches of a religion that preaches love and acceptance need to be as discriminatory and militant as possible to retain a devout group of worshippers.
If you actually attend an average non-denominational church of the sort that is most vibrant, you'll find that they're the very opposite of discriminatory and militant. Their core mission statement is usually some variant on spreading the love of God to the world, and that is what they attempt to do through the preaching from the pulpit, through the relational connections they encourage between everyone who comes through the doors, through the community outreach to the less fortunate that they engage in. They strive to be a welcoming and caring community that fosters the spiritual health of anyone who seek them out.
It's important to note that love as understood by Christianity doesn't involve affirming everyone's behaviors or approving of people doing whatever their feelings tell them to do. I've seen a couple people bring up the story of the woman caught in adultery found in John 8 of the Bible in relation to Christian beliefs, but they haven't quoted the end of the passage:
John 8:2-11 said:
At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 4 and said to Jesus, Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say? They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.
But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her. Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.
At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. Jesus straightened up and asked her, Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?
No one, sir, she said.
Then neither do I condemn you, Jesus declared. Go now and leave your life of sin.
Jesus doesn't say, "Because I do not condemn you, you can go right back and continue with your adultery and that'll be just fine and dandy." He says, "Because I have given you freedom from condemnation, I also now ask of you to follow the path of freedom from sin." Jesus preaches both forgiveness of sin and repentance of sin. It's the same Christian perspective that is at work in the opening of Victor Hugo's Les Miserables, when the bishop who housed Jean Vajean, after Valjean is discovered by police absconding with the bishop's silver, gives Valjean the silver he did not steal and prevents him from being arrested. He does not tell Valjean, "You have my permission to go on stealing," but "With this silver, go and make an honest man of yourself." This is Christian mercy in action.
So the concept of Christian love is embracing each person as precious in the eyes of God, and offering them the grace and forgiveness that God offers us, as well as encouraging each other to avoid the sin that breaks God's heart while persuing the virtue that pleases God, and ultimately will lead to the most fulfilling life. This is, of course, a much, much broader program than the mere narrow issue of homosexuality, and those Christians who exclusively focus on that issue, especially when they use it to ignore the sin in their own lives, are badly mistaken on what the teachings they claim to follow actually say. The Christian teaching on the sanctity of marriage and the proper role of sex within it challenges many Christians living in America today. Ultimately, the ideal of Christian love as practiced by the church means that the church should be open and welcoming to all who seek its doors, recognizing that we are all sinners in need of God's grace, while challenging everyone to not continue in their life of sin, as Jesus challenged the woman caught in adultery, but to repent and seek the path of holiness that leads to communion with God and with each other.