Alright well I didn't know if this was the right thread to post this in, but my aunt has had a vast history of mental illnesses including depression and schizophrenia. I haven't talked to her in a very long time, yet randomly this morning she sends me two very extravagant texts about how much she loves me. While that was nice it just felt very off. Are these often precursors to something suicidal or am I just dumb going down that line of thinking?
Depression
- Thread starter Jea Song
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Zeouterlimits
Member
I hate this! Hate it. God... 
MisterLuffy
Member
I took a test for calculus last week on Volumes of Revolution, Areas and Volumes, and Volumes of Slice. It was really hard test. I didn't get to do the last problem, but at least I did the rest. However, when I got out, I felt that I didn't pass. For the past two weeks I didn't understand the concepts that well. It really stressed me out to know what I got, but what's the point of knowing if you know your going to fail it. That's how I feel with my life. I always relate my tests I take with my life because I feel like a failure and I'm not doing anything to fix my failures over the past 6 years.
Lucian Cat
Kissed a mod for a tag; liked it
I'd check it out just to be safe. You wouldn't want that on your conscience if something did happen.
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
Trent Strong
Banned
Placebo effect.
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
So my therapist gave me an ~exercise~ to do, but I can't do it
What is this exercise?
Write a letter to myself about positive things about me. :/ I really have absolutely nothing positive to say about myself. Like...staring at this page for an hour and coming up blank.
ClassyPenguin
Banned
This.
And also, those can interfere with medications and cause things like Serotonin Syndrome. So mention it to your doc if you take these things.
So beginning CBT?
It takes some effort to begin but after a while you find yourself catching and hopefully stopping yourself from negative thought-spirals or traps.
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
If it makes you feel any better, I probably couldn't make a positive list about myself either. :/
I think so? But she didn't say that directly. This exercise isn't something I can do though. The best I can say is "well. You're a person. Who does stuff. Good for you!". There is absolutely nothing positive or good or right about me :/
Which probably isn't the point of this exercise. :lol
what to do with us?ClassyPenguin
Banned
I think so? But she didn't say that directly. This exercise isn't something I can do though. The best I can say is "well. You're a person. Who does stuff. Good for you!". There is absolutely nothing positive or good or right about me :/
Which probably isn't the point of this exercise. :lol
Just write stuff down. Anything, but be descriptive. Like think of any hobbies or stuff that you like to do (for example, posting on neogaf.)
But that's not like... "Wow that's such an amazing thing about you!" It's just a thing that I do.
You can write that you have a good design sense because your avatar is awesome.
Certainly not, they do tangible things on the body. My body is very sensitive, I do feel them, and I see the positive results in my blood tests.
There are lots of clinical trials done on various herbs, look them up. Many quite positive results. Also, herbal healing was part of the folk wisdom of many cultures for thousands of years. There's a lot of immensely valuable herbs to unearth, that can allow us to cope better with a variety of ailments, including depression.
I disclose everything to my doc, none of the herbs have any interaction with my medication.
Also, what about all the noxious side effects of medication itself? Herbs help your body to heal itself, often you can just take them for a few months.
I suppose only a minority of people could come up with truly amazing things about themselves. Start with things you can just do better than others, even if they seem neglectable or common to you.
Yes. It would be fine if I had something to do for the better part of the week, though. Otherwise I don't like being completely unproductive.
You betcha, I don't have to deal with thinking about dumb personal issues when I'm at work.
brianjones
Member
the main source of my depression is not having a job
I wish I did. Then I'd be happy working.
Depressed the most at work. I feel like something inevitable is going to come up. Slowly creeping up on me, and if I don't do something soon, I'll make an irrational decision.
Prax
Member
I didn't make it
Lol that song.
You can write that you can write. xD Relatively good grammar.
And that you like that you are relatively healthy. And you know how to enjoy a good laugh. Can navigate the internet and are technically savvy. Doesn't want to murder everyone. Even the simplest things you take for granted can be good things!
Just imagine yourself as a third person that you are only acquainted with and start listing good things you would normally say about anyone. I think you will realize how forgiving and compassionate you can be to others but are somehow withholding it from yourself (something I also have to remind myself all the time). The exercise is about finding that balanced perspective, I'm guessing.
And I just wanted to drop into this Depression thread to let everyone know here you have my support and everything. I don't post too often on GAF because of my own social anxiety, which even limits my internet posting (and I even considered deleting this post multiple times out of fear of making a fool of myself!), but I figure if it makes some people at least feel better or something, it will be worth it. O___O
I don't have any advice since I don't know what will work for people, but I've always thought that keeping yourself busy and engaged in something keeps intrusive negative thoughts away (whether work or a hobby--as long as it is a good amount of challenge and is enjoyable.. for example, art and creative endeavours is what does it for me).
Mysterious Stranger
Member
Get more sunlight and stay BUSY!
It's getting harder and harder to resist my girlfriend's depression taking me down with her, especially when she tells me she rather break up and be alone than see a therapist. fuck. I'm reaching the end of my ideas of how I can help her.
thesoapster
Member
For me it's just never been there. I could write out things that are positive about me, or go by all the positive feedback I get in various ways, but it doesn't change the way I feel or fix what's missing. I feel like a very incomplete person.
Surface of Me
I'm not an NPC. And neither are we.
The past few days have just been a low pit. I have no idea why. I just have no will, I feel so miserable. I just think that I wouldn't care if I died right now, I'm not going to attempt suicide or anything, but I would welcome death right now.
lol
I hope they weren't banned for this
Vitamin D deficiency is related to depression
RPGCrazied
Member
I guess I have mild depression, but lately I've been so lonely. Family doesn't count. I can't talk to them about my interests and other stuff. Plus, I haven't been with a guy in over 10 years, being 35 and kinda chubby doesn't help matters either. I just would like to find someone interested in friendships or more, but its been so hard to even find the friend part.
ChackanKun
Member
Surely he wasn't banned for saying one of the things that helped me the most lol
Another thing it helps a lot when I'm down is jazz. Not rock or anything that can bring out bad emotions, and most of all no sad songs!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCPs8bZ-KhE
Been feeling like shit lately. Made worse by the fact that I just totally bombed another test today.
Also had my first clinic visit today. Seemed like it was more of the same question-analysis stuff I went through with my GP and the crisis-worker I talked to last Friday. Psychiatrist said I suffer from extreme depression (yikes) as well as anxiety. He tried explaining to my dad what depression is, and I don't think the message went through so clearly.. -_-
Since the clinic operates on appointments, the psychiatrist gave me two addresses with walk-in clinics, but forget that. I'd be at square one all over again, and I really hate having to answer the basic "so how long have you felt this way?" stuff (guess that's the part of me that doesn't open up easily). He did seem a bit pushy on me taking meds, however, and that made me sort of cringe. Anyway, next appointment is a little over a month away. Going to my GP later tonight to see what he says regarding medication.
EDIT: Got prescribed with cipralex by the psychiatrist, 5 mg a day for 2 weeks, then I'll be bumped up to 10. Anyone had any experience with it? Bit nervous to try meds since it seems I'm always in the % group that suffers some bad side effects (had to be taken off Accutane due to horrible stomach pains which my doctor said could have developed into Crohn's :/).
Also had my first clinic visit today. Seemed like it was more of the same question-analysis stuff I went through with my GP and the crisis-worker I talked to last Friday. Psychiatrist said I suffer from extreme depression (yikes) as well as anxiety. He tried explaining to my dad what depression is, and I don't think the message went through so clearly.. -_-
Since the clinic operates on appointments, the psychiatrist gave me two addresses with walk-in clinics, but forget that. I'd be at square one all over again, and I really hate having to answer the basic "so how long have you felt this way?" stuff (guess that's the part of me that doesn't open up easily). He did seem a bit pushy on me taking meds, however, and that made me sort of cringe. Anyway, next appointment is a little over a month away. Going to my GP later tonight to see what he says regarding medication.
EDIT: Got prescribed with cipralex by the psychiatrist, 5 mg a day for 2 weeks, then I'll be bumped up to 10. Anyone had any experience with it? Bit nervous to try meds since it seems I'm always in the % group that suffers some bad side effects (had to be taken off Accutane due to horrible stomach pains which my doctor said could have developed into Crohn's :/).
Been feeling like shit lately. Made worse by the fact that I just totally bombed another test today.
Have you spoken to your school about your issues. It's not right that some mental health problems negatively impact your schooling. If you let them know they may be able to provide you with some support or accommodate you in some way.
Not yet, but I do plan to soon. If I really did get below a 75% on this test (modern, quantum physics unit of physics), then I'm dropping the course. Or, I actually might just drop the course either way. Mentally I'm not up for the stress it's putting me through (lack of concentration -> lack of motivation -> last minute cramming -> fail -> repeat cycle).
Try asking them for copies of their/your records, so you can give them the next psychotherapist or psychiatrist. It saves their time and you don't have to explain everything again. I had to explain my anxiety symptoms on three different occasions, annoying as hell if you just want help (then again, the more the therapist knows about you, the better). Luckily I could start a therapy at the third therapist. I don't know how the legal status of personal health records is where you live (Canada?), but e.g. here in Germany patients have the right to get a copy of everything.
Same in Canada, for what it's worth.
OpinionatedCyborg
Member
You can have your doctor send copies of the database to another doctor, but your new doctor is likely to do a complete health history on you anyway since the old doctor's notes are probably messy as hell and the new doctor may want to learn the information for his or herself. But any lab results or prescription history would help the new doctor a lot. In Canada, you have the right to see your records and obtain a copy at a reasonable cost to you so long as the physician does not think letting you see the records will put you or anyone else in danger. The secratorial or nursing staff likely won't let you have your records until you have spoken to your doctor directly.
Dammit! Had I known this I would have done it right away. I don't think it's likely I be able to speak to the doctor directly until my next interview (that clinic seems to be swomped in work), though I may try. My dad picked up my prescription (Cipralex, or Escitalopram) for me today. Gonna start taking it later tonight (and by that I mean about 3 am) since it apparently makes you sleepy.
I got a 76% on the physics test I did today (which is much more than I feel I deserve considering the amount of effort I put into studying for it), so at least I'm passing with a 54% now. But I didn't hand in a lab report due today as I plan on dropping the course Monday. I really just can't keep up with everything with the way I feel (and no matter how hard I try to break out of this apathetic state, it just doesn't happen.), and it makes me feel pathetic. Every other person in the class is keeping up, so why can't I?
I got a 76% on the physics test I did today (which is much more than I feel I deserve considering the amount of effort I put into studying for it), so at least I'm passing with a 54% now. But I didn't hand in a lab report due today as I plan on dropping the course Monday. I really just can't keep up with everything with the way I feel (and no matter how hard I try to break out of this apathetic state, it just doesn't happen.), and it makes me feel pathetic. Every other person in the class is keeping up, so why can't I?
Agent Cooper
Member
Uhh... Dating some guy now. Really apprehensive that he'll find out how I really am and realize he's made a mistake.
I'm just so tired. All of the time.
I hate being tired.
I'm just so tired. All of the time.
I hate being tired.
Is he nice or does he seem understanding? If he thinks being with you is a "mistake" over your depression (from what I gathered in your message, sorry if that's not all), then forget him. It's not always the easiest thing to deal with a depressed person, but it doesn't mean you shouldn't (known from experience with my friend and me currently). If things don't work out with him over this, then good riddance to him, I'd say.
I know the tired feeling. Got it right now, unfortunately.
Have you been to a doctor/are you seeing anyone for this?PM me if you want to talk more.
revolverjgw
Member
OK, I think the next time I talk to my doctor I'm going to say something about my depression. I think I want to talk to a therapist, so what can I expect? Will my doctor want to talk to me in depth about it first, or will she just set me up with somebody after our appointment? Do I ask for somebody/some kind of doctor in particular? As of right now I really don't want to be medicated, just need somebody to discuss this with.
Your doctor will likely question you with things like "How long have you been like this?" "Any suicidal thoughts/thinking about hurting yourself or attempting?" etc. From there they'll likely refer you to someone, or in my case, they may send you to a hospital's emergency centre (so you get "priority" assessment/treatment). You might want do some research on therapists in your area and ask for a referral to them, or go with who your doctor/the hospital people recommend or set you up with.
You don't have to go on meds right away. Just say you'd rather not be on them.
EDIT: 2:40 in the morning and I'm getting a random crying spell. I want someone to talk to. I need someone to talk to. I feel like utter shit all of a sudden.
The problem is that you perceive there to be absolutely nothing positive or good or right about you. It's not about reality, it's about your perceptions of reality.
I didn't say I'd become anti-social. I'm just giving up on wanting to be as social as everyone else which has always put a ton of pressure on me. Accepting that I'll never be a very social guy will result in less stress and more confidence which in turn will make me more social. Putting all your energy in trying to be social has the opposite effect and it leaves you with so little energy that you can't achieve anything in life.
I've been working on this for a few weeks already and I'm already slightly improving. I've already had a few conversations that felt more natural and less forced than usual.
So on a scale of 1 - 10 how messed up is to have a dream about your ex-girlfriend who committed suicide a couple years ago and you feel guilty for not helping out in the end. In the dream she is having issues and problems and i'm there for her, take her to dairy queen and she sits at a table with some balding older guys and starts picking one up for sex right in front of me. I'm sure there is an even deeper meaning but right now its throwing my whole day off. How pathetic am I where in my own dreams i'm getting treated like shit.
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