GAF Anonymous Confessions thread 4.0 the last huzzah

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One of my older cousins seemed to be very interested on that, but luckily I didn't keep contact with him. Always thought he'd end up as a convicted sex offender.
 
The Anti-Monitor said:
He's got quite the womanizer fame and made some pretty creepy comments about me growing up. Logically I didn't really ask about them, and luckily he didn't insist too much.
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Oh ok, I ask because I have two pretty hot cousins but I always tried to act like I didn't notice. Plus we would never see each other for years on end so each time I came back they always looked different. I never said anything creepy or acted strange, but kind of hard not to notice. Fuck I just made a confession.
 
Riggs said:
Oh ok, I ask because I have two pretty hot cousins but I always tried to act like I didn't notice. Plus we would never see each other for years on end so each time I came back they always looked different. I never said anything creepy or acted strange, but kind of hard not to notice. Fuck I just made a confession.
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Well, there's a difference between complimenting how well you're growing up and doing so while focusing on certain parts and staring at them.

And comparing them with those of an ex.
 
The Anti-Monitor said:
Well, there's a difference between complimenting how well you're growing up and doing so while focusing on certain parts and staring at them.

And comparing them with those of an ex.
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Lol I didn't compliment them at all, I didn't want anyone to realize I was attracted to my cousins on ANY level. Shit is just way to taboo, hopefully they never noticed that I was. I would never of acted on anything, but yeah I always felt guilty about even being remotely attracted to either one of them.

Your cuzzo does sound creepy though lol.
 
It's a doozy. I slept with my brothers first g/f and future wife. We were both 16 at the time and my brother was 14. They weren't having sex, and she didn't know how to make it so they would and i sorta took advantage of it by telling her I could help. We had sex constantly, but, I never felt any love with her, and she sadly did love me. I felt bad, but, she was so damn hot and I was horny and lonely. When they finally started having sex, she lied and said she was a virgin to him and he believed it. She never really loved him but was too afraid to break his heart because she was very weak willed and shy. She grew up very socially awkward, had few friends and was just odd. After we graduated HS we both stayed at home and went to a Community College. her grades were terrible and she couldn't afford a university. I as well. Things got worse when my brother after graduating went off to join the army. He told me before he shipped out, he wanted to marry her before he left.

I didn't have anything to say, but, good luck. I wish I could have told him how she really felt. That night I got the worst news of my life when she told me she was pregnant. I asked her if it was ours or his, and she didn't know. I told her, she had to get an abortion. Im then told her we had to stop having sex, and just sorta end the relation between us. She cried, because she to my horror loved me. I managed to guilt trip her into getting the abortion by saying "if you really love me you'll do it and then we'll see what happens", despite her wanting to have the child. I knew she would be devastated but kept on pushing her. A couple days later she got the abortion, and that was the end of that. I felt it was probably a good time to fully tell her how i felt, and so I told her off and told her I never loved her and didn't want to keep on with the relation. It killed her inside, and all she said was "I hate you" in such a cold voice. She accepted his proposal, and they've been married ever since. She doesn't love him nor herself and you can tell she doesn't because she's lost her youthful charm, now she's bitter and depressed. She' lies and says she's just depressed and as such their relation suffers. they constantly fight, and my brother comes to me and tells me how he doesn't understand why she's so depressed. I ruined her life because I kept on sleeping with her instead of laying down the law and ending it before things got out of hand.

Nobody knows about this, and if they did find out I'd be no longer welcome with the family. My brother would probably kill me if he knew I was sleeping with his g/f and fiance and got her pregnant and forced her to have an abortion. It's been a few years, I'm nearing 30 and to be married in October. I regret every moment of it. She's been suicidal several times now, and has a child she doesn't care for, a husband she doesn't love and a life she didn't want. I do my best to avoid her, and likewise with her.

How did my brother or anyone never find out? Simple my brother was an idiot and we hid the relation. My brother knew we were friends, but, never figured out we were more then friends. We had a few close calls, but, we never really did anything but have sex. Sometimes we'd go out on dates, but, those were few and far between. Whenever he asked why she was so upset, she alway's made excuses on how she hated the world, pr just said her parents. She hated her dad, her mom had died during child birth and her dad blames her for it and has always been cold and distant and somewhat abusive.
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Holy shit you are a terrible person
 
Cyan said:
I love that Doozy is still racking up the negative comments several days and pages later.
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I'm kinda surprised that not a single person have even tried to defend him, either genuinely our just for the sake of some debate.
Glad to know that pretty much everyone thinks that Doozy made a big doozy.
 
SquiddyBiscuit said:
I'm kinda surprised that not a single person have even tried to defend him, either genuinely our just for the sake of some debate.
Glad to know that pretty much everyone thinks that Doozy made a big doozy.
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Yeah, now we know where the lines are actually drawn in regards to the claim that there is a defense force for everything on gaf. Everyone can link to this post and say "no, not everything".
 
jorma said:
Yeah, now we know where the lines are actually drawn in regards to the claim that there is a defense force for everything on gaf. Everyone can link to this post and say "no, not everything".
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Can you imagine being that guy? The one guy that does something that even GAF can't muster a defense force for? That's when you' know you've gone off the deep end.
 
Does GAF believe in redemption, though? What if he genuinely regrets his actions? He's already crossed the point of no return, and there's probably nothing he can do to salvage the situation. If he can't be redeemed, is he better off just killing himself? I don't like to believe that should be a solution. He can keep it hidden forever (won't happen), or run away and start a new life elsewhere. Do past crimes remove any right he should have to happiness? I don't think I know the answer to that. What if he spends the rest of his life atoning for his past?

I think regret can change the nature of a man, though. Planescape: Torment taught me that.

That's as close of a defense I can make for him. What he did is terrible, but he's still human, and he felt enough remorse to post about it anonymously on a videogame forum, at the very least. Who knows.
 
Why do people keep saying Doozy's story will eventually come out? He's not planning to say anything and its not like the wife has any reason to talk. If it hasn't come out by now it never will
 
HamPster PamPster said:
Why do people keep saying Doozy's story will eventually come out? He's not planning to say anything and its not like the wife has any reason to talk. If it hasn't come out by now it never will
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If (when) the unhappy marriage falls apart, after all the divorse settlements are done, what easier way to hurt the brother? To spite the poster?

The only sympathy I have is for the brother and the kid.
 
Llyranor said:
If (when) the unhappy marriage falls apart, after all the divorse settlements are done, what easier way to hurt the brother? To spite the poster?
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Yep. Or, when she's at the end of her tether, and feels like she has nothing to lose...

Sirpopopop said:
I shall use Doozy's story as inspiration for my next tale of star crossed lovers who went to Berkeley and Stanford.
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This is already a sad story. :(
 
HamPster PamPster said:
Why do people keep saying Doozy's story will eventually come out? He's not planning to say anything and its not like the wife has any reason to talk. If it hasn't come out by now it never will
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Stuff like that always comes out in the end or she will blackmail the OP into some more loving.
 
Llyranor said:
Does GAF believe in redemption, though? What if he genuinely regrets his actions? He's already crossed the point of no return, and there's probably nothing he can do to salvage the situation. If he can't be redeemed, is he better off just killing himself? I don't like to believe that should be a solution. He can keep it hidden forever (won't happen), or run away and start a new life elsewhere. Do past crimes remove any right he should have to happiness? I don't think I know the answer to that. What if he spends the rest of his life atoning for his past?

I think regret can change the nature of a man, though. Planescape: Torment taught me that.

That's as close of a defense I can make for him. What he did is terrible, but he's still human, and he felt enough remorse to post about it anonymously on a videogame forum, at the very least. Who knows.
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I think redemption is internal. Like externally, if his friends/family knew what he did they would probably never forgive him, no matter how much he changes. But internally if he can make that shift away from being what is clearly a terrible person and turn his life around, then that is meaningful in some way, even if only for him. I think he could at least make amends with himself, but that would probably have to involve him leaving the life that he knows. And maybe a hundred years of good works to bring some balance back to the world.
 
Man..reading the last few pages of stories of guys cockblocking themselves brought up a ton of memories of me doing the same thing to myself from childhood to adulthood.

- In middle school I was fairly popular with the ladies but I had a big crush on the hottest girl in school and pretty much only had eyes for her throughout 8th grade. Well a few 7th grade girls invited me and some friends over to a house to hangout and they plotted to lock me in the bathroom with one of the girls who liked me. Once we were in there she was like "hey, I want to give you head" and I was pretty much like "nah I'm good.." knowing that if it got out I'd never have a chance with my crush. I eventually did get with my crush but she ended up cheating on me so even now like 15 years later I wish I let that girl blow me.

- High school, fairly similar status with the ladies, going through them pretty quickly, but in senior year I finally get a serious girl. Cue (another) younger friend of mine showing up at my window one night Dawson's Creeks style, dropping her pants, exposing her fully shaved self, and asking me what I'd like to do. Of course I tell her I'm in a serious relationship right now and love my girl (I did) and decline but again, as an adult I think what the fuck was wrong with me I should've smanged that girl.

- In my early 20's and hooking up with this British chick I met in Japan. Things are going fairly quickly and we're definitely going to seal the deal, but she casually mentions that her "ex" will be coming to visit her in a week and when that happens I'll pretty much have to avoid her otherwise he'll freak out. I'm fine with that, nothing serious here, no feelings, but in the back of my head I'm thinking "ick..". Anyway, we go out for some drinks with friends, head home, she throws me on the floor, takes my pants off, ready to jump on my cock but I stop her and say "listen, your man is coming tomorrow, why don't you see how that goes first before you make a mistake here". This one actually turned out to be the right call because she became a totally different person after her ex came and went off the deep end.

Looking back on these instances I can't help but laugh now as a married man with kids.. I envy my younger self for even being in those kind of situations but having this weird sense of honor or romanticism or something that stopped me every time because there was someone else I liked or I was involved. For the record I've never cheated once in my life and never plan to (I'm sure my wife appreciates that).
 
Mudita said:
I think redemption is internal. Like externally, if his friends/family knew what he did they would probably never forgive him, no matter how much he changes. But internally if he can make that shift away from being what is clearly a terrible person and turn his life around, then that is meaningful in some way, even if only for him. I think he could at least make amends with himself, but that would probably have to involve him leaving the life that he knows. And maybe a hundred years of good works to bring some balance back to the world.
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Excellent post. Internal is keyword here folks.


worldrevolution said:
Man..reading the last few pages of stories of guys cockblocking themselves brought up a ton of memories of me doing the same thing to myself from childhood to adulthood.

- In middle school I was fairly popular with the ladies but I had a big crush on the hottest girl in school and pretty much only had eyes for her throughout 8th grade. Well a few 7th grade girls invited me and some friends over to a house to hangout and they plotted to lock me in the bathroom with one of the girls who liked me. Once we were in there she was like "hey, I want to give you head" and I was pretty much like "nah I'm good.." knowing that if it got out I'd never have a chance with my crush. I eventually did get with my crush but she ended up cheating on me so even now like 15 years later I wish I let that girl blow me.

- High school, fairly similar status with the ladies, going through them pretty quickly, but in senior year I finally get a serious girl. Cue (another) younger friend of mine showing up at my window one night Dawson's Creeks style, dropping her pants, exposing her fully shaved self, and asking me what I'd like to do. Of course I tell her I'm in a serious relationship right now and love my girl (I did) and decline but again, as an adult I think what the fuck was wrong with me I should've smanged that girl.

- In my early 20's and hooking up with this British chick I met in Japan. Things are going fairly quickly and we're definitely going to seal the deal, but she casually mentions that her "ex" will be coming to visit her in a week and when that happens I'll pretty much have to avoid her otherwise he'll freak out. I'm fine with that, nothing serious here, no feelings, but in the back of my head I'm thinking "ick..". Anyway, we go out for some drinks with friends, head home, she throws me on the floor, takes my pants off, ready to jump on my cock but I stop her and say "listen, your man is coming tomorrow, why don't you see how that goes first before you make a mistake here". This one actually turned out to be the right call because she became a totally different person after her ex came and went off the deep end.

Looking back on these instances I can't help but laugh now as a married man with kids.. I envy my younger self for even being in those kind of situations but having this weird sense of honor or romanticism or something that stopped me every time because there was someone else I liked or I was involved. For the record I've never cheated once in my life and never plan to (I'm sure my wife appreciates that).
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I don't know what 7th grade male could turn down a blow job at that age, you are like some kind of god of self control. Mad props for being a good guy though, never cheated either and it feels good.
 
Well, here goes...

-kissless virgin throughout high school
-meet 8.5/10 super petite former gymnast asian/white girl through mutual friends sophomore year of college
-she works at the same place as me so we end up hanging out a lot
-start catching feelings
-she can see it and tells me we will never be anything more than friends
-can't get over her
-end up becoming best friends to this day
-end up moving into an apartment with her (2bedroom)
-she enters 2 serious relationships with guys in this time, can hear her fucking them through my ceiling
-she breaks up with both of them, I console her and try to make her feel better because I can't stand to see her sad
-we move out and into separate but close apartments
-she's on a date with a guy tonight who she suspects might be a virgin, even though she would swear to this second that she would never go out with a virgin
-still can't get over her
-now 25 year old kissless virgin (I think, I might have made out with someone while blackout drunk on my bday a year or two back)
-no idea how to move on
-no idea how to score some other chick to maybe help me get over her
-she even tries to help me but I am so fucking incapable of even approaching a woman I don't know that I think she's close to giving up on helping me

Fuck my life. At least I have a pretty good job now, so I don't have to worry about money too much. What do I do? I need to fix my crippling approach anxiety or I'll never get anywhere with anyone. She says I can't score any women because I refuse to put myself out there. I don't even know what to do or how to do it. I still want to remain friends with her, because she's awesome but I need to find someone else to take my mind off of things.
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So I don't get it. Are you not going out because you're secretly holding out for this chick? Or because if you've got social anxiety?

If the former, remove yourself from the outcome and stop caring. Changes everything.
If the latter, get help for your social anxiety first. Then the rest will come naturally.
 
Lost password from yesterday, and I forgot the security question answer. So...............
Not a troll. GS are the worst, but HGSS amends its wounds and puts in the top 3. If anyone's wondering......
Pt
HGSS
B2W2
BW
RSE
RGBY=FRLG
DP
GSC

Grew up with Pokemon, and that's honestly how I feel. DP and RGBY never did anything special for me, but the last 4 iterations of Pokemon have been gob-smackingly amazing. Favorite mon are Flygon, Golurk and Empoleon, and nothing can be said bad of them. NOTHING! So cause its a confession thread, I have some dirty things to tell strangers on a forum I'm not a member of:
Horrible luck of cockblocking myself. Couple of months ago I was sharing a cab with this woman, she had to be in her mid 20s, l'm 19,dad in the front seat. This was during rush hour, so it was a 20 minute ride. 5 minutes in after some intense staring on her part, started chatting her up, nothing special. Got a couple of knee rubs, yes I'm 19 and knee rubs still turn me on, so the flirting commenced. By the time we got to my stop my dad had that look in his eyes were he knew she whispered into my ears for me to go home with her and to do so. Completely bailed, and god damn do I regret it. Another time I was getting footsied by this girl sitting opposite of me in the internet cafe, and was too nervous to talk to her. Also could have spent a weekend with a smokin hot 20 year old at a beach side hotel for a professional convention for my profession in the same room. Needless to say forgot to call her.
Nothing else to share, but I might tell other stuff if I find away to say em without fear of being found out.
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Wait, your DAD gave you the "go sleep with her!" look and you still bailed? Man, nothing can help you (well that and your crappy tastes in Pokemon games, GS for life!)
 
Hi,

I'm not HiDes, that guy is in some serious need of help, but I have previously posted a suicide thread on GAF because I was feeling pretty bad. I wasn't anywhere near a suicide, but I wanted the attention I thought the thread would give me. I really liked all the support and attention I got, so thank you all who has posted in a suicide thread the last 10months or so
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Your mistake was giving us a timeframe. If you hadn't everyone would've thought you were manabyte, now you will be found out.
 
Also to get gaf going, I will admit to jacking off to the cousin stories. They turn me on a lot, only cause all my cousins are extremely hot, and they are complete cockteases.
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Pro-tip: Even if you anonymize your confessions but use the same anonymous alias for multiple confessions I'll know it's you. It makes these so much more fun.

my advice, dude, go get laid.
 
NaughtyCalibur said:
Not that I'm proud, but I've got you both beat...

When I was 17 creeping up on 18 I got my first real job at a hospital parking garage. The first day during lunch I decided to go to this java cafe inside of the hospital, and when I got there I was confronted with the sexiest girl I had ever seen in person (think: an 18 year old Eva Mendez), and actually chocked up a bit when I tried to order. I remember actually thinking to myself on the way back to the job that day, "never going to happen in a million years -- just forget about it."

Then that same day after work I sat at the bus stop waiting for my bus ride home, and then here she comes. She sits down at the bus stop right next to me, and then like some shit out of a movie just starts talking to me and opening up to me big time. It isn't long before she's dragging me to this coffee shop across the street and buying me espresso shots as we got to know each other fairly well. I was still in shock at this point, and couldn't believe any of it. She was a real life Manic Pixie Dream Girl, I shit you not.

Anywho, long story short, she informs me that she's emancipated and has her own place and that I should come over. I make some bullshit excuse as to why I can't come, but we exchange numbers and plan it for another day.

"Another day" comes, she not only wants me to come over but says she wants to cook for me as well. This time I say something extra lame like, "oh I wish I could but my mom needs me at home today." So postpone it yet another day. "Yet another day" comes and she calls me up, eventually telling me how horny she is and how she needs me to come over. Even though it's one bus ride away, I chicken out again. After that she stopped trying, probably figuring, with good reason, that I wasn't interested in her.

What blows my mind about this is that I was no virgin, it's just my few girlfriends before that were nowhere near as hot as this girl and I felt like I had to live up to some Godlike expectations sexually to please her, and didn't want to fail or some shit. So basically: I was an insecure little bitch. It pisses me off because had that been just two years later when I entered into college and got a whole new perspective on life I would have gone for it without a care in the world.

tl;dr -- I cock blocked myself out of potentially the best sex of my life multiple times with the same smoking hot girl who was trying hard to jump my bones. :(
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I actually cringed and felt sad.
 
NaughtyCalibur said:
Not that I'm proud, but I've got you both beat...

When I was 17 creeping up on 18 I got my first real job at a hospital parking garage. The first day during lunch I decided to go to this java cafe inside of the hospital, and when I got there I was confronted with the sexiest girl I had ever seen in person (think: an 18 year old Eva Mendez), and actually chocked up a bit when I tried to order. I remember actually thinking to myself on the way back to the job that day, "never going to happen in a million years -- just forget about it."

Then that same day after work I sat at the bus stop waiting for my bus ride home, and then here she comes. She sits down at the bus stop right next to me, and then like some shit out of a movie just starts talking to me and opening up to me big time. It isn't long before she's dragging me to this coffee shop across the street and buying me espresso shots as we got to know each other fairly well. I was still in shock at this point, and couldn't believe any of it. She was a real life Manic Pixie Dream Girl, I shit you not.

Anywho, long story short, she informs me that she's emancipated and has her own place and that I should come over. I make some bullshit excuse as to why I can't come, but we exchange numbers and plan it for another day.

"Another day" comes, she not only wants me to come over but says she wants to cook for me as well. This time I say something extra lame like, "oh I wish I could but my mom needs me at home today." So postpone it yet another day. "Yet another day" comes and she calls me up, eventually telling me how horny she is and how she needs me to come over. Even though it's one bus ride away, I chicken out again. After that she stopped trying, probably figuring, with good reason, that I wasn't interested in her.

What blows my mind about this is that I was no virgin, it's just my few girlfriends before that were nowhere near as hot as this girl and I felt like I had to live up to some Godlike expectations sexually to please her, and didn't want to fail or some shit. So basically: I was an insecure little bitch. It pisses me off because had that been just two years later when I entered into college and got a whole new perspective on life I would have gone for it without a care in the world.

tl;dr -- I cock blocked myself out of potentially the best sex of my life multiple times with the same smoking hot girl who was trying hard to jump my bones. :(
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maybe you just saved yourself a kidney

lol nah you fucked up dawg
 
It's a doozy. I slept with my brothers first g/f and future wife. We were both 16 at the time and my brother was 14. They weren't having sex, and she didn't know how to make it so they would and i sorta took advantage of it by telling her I could help. We had sex constantly, but, I never felt any love with her, and she sadly did love me. I felt bad, but, she was so damn hot and I was horny and lonely. When they finally started having sex, she lied and said she was a virgin to him and he believed it. She never really loved him but was too afraid to break his heart because she was very weak willed and shy. She grew up very socially awkward, had few friends and was just odd. After we graduated HS we both stayed at home and went to a Community College. her grades were terrible and she couldn't afford a university. I as well. Things got worse when my brother after graduating went off to join the army. He told me before he shipped out, he wanted to marry her before he left.

I didn't have anything to say, but, good luck. I wish I could have told him how she really felt. That night I got the worst news of my life when she told me she was pregnant. I asked her if it was ours or his, and she didn't know. I told her, she had to get an abortion. I'm then told her we had to stop having sex, and just sorta end the relation between us. She cried, because she to my horror loved me. I managed to guilt trip her into getting the abortion by saying "if you really love me you'll do it and then we'll see what happens", despite her wanting to have the child. I knew she would be devastated but kept on pushing her. A couple days later she got the abortion, and that was the end of that. I felt it was probably a good time to fully tell her how i felt, and so I told her off and told her I never loved her and didn't want to keep on with the relation. It killed her inside, and all she said was "I hate you" in such a cold voice. She accepted his proposal, and they've been married ever since. She doesn't love him nor herself and you can tell she doesn't because she's lost her youthful charm, now she's bitter and depressed. She' lies and says she's just depressed and as such their relation suffers. they constantly fight, and my brother comes to me and tells me how he doesn't understand why she's so depressed. I ruined her life because I kept on sleeping with her instead of laying down the law and ending it before things got out of hand.

Nobody knows about this, and if they did find out I'd be no longer welcome with the family. My brother would probably kill me if he knew I was sleeping with his g/f and fiance and got her pregnant and forced her to have an abortion. It's been a few years, I'm nearing 30 and to be married in October. I regret every moment of it. She's been suicidal several times now, and has a child she doesn't care for, a husband she doesn't love and a life she didn't want. I do my best to avoid her, and likewise with her.

How did my brother or anyone never find out? Simple my brother was an idiot and we hid the relation. My brother knew we were friends, but, never figured out we were more then friends. We had a few close calls, but, we never really did anything but have sex. Sometimes we'd go out on dates, but, those were few and far between. Whenever he asked why she was so upset, she alway's made excuses on how she hated the world, pr just said her parents. She hated her dad, her mom had died during child birth and her dad blames her for it and has always been cold and distant and somewhat abusive.
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What a shitty person. Damn.
 
When I was in college we used to have Wednesday afternoons off for sports or extra studying. I was not particularly sporty, and was taking extra subjects so usually went to the library to study.

This particular Wednesday I went home, both my parents work so I was on my own. We only had a one computer for the whole family at the time, and I had turned it on when I noticed something left in the tray of the printer. It was directions to a an orgy or brothel. It had an address on it, a really dodgy picture of some woman with her breasts out, and a time and a date.

I was kind of stunned. My family consists of me, my Dad, my Mum and my younger sister. It was pretty clear who the culprit was, but to confirm it, my Dad arrived home. I had heard his car pull up the drive, so had shut the computer down and gone into the kitchen. I didn't want him to know i'd seen it.

Dad never comes home in the middle of the day. He was surprised to see me and asked why I wasn't in college. I told him that Wednesday afternoons were kept free for study/sports.

He left shortly after and when I went back to the printer the sheet was gone.

Now, I had remembered the date and Dad came home that night, but for ages whenever he worked late I was suspicious. I would log on to our computer when no one was about and look at the browser history, but didn't find anything.

After about a year, I moved away to uni, and it kind of dropped out of my mind. I have no idea if Dad has any suspicion that I might know.

I Was a real Daddy's girl and idolised my Dad. I come from a happy family, but this was the moment I realised that all adults can fuck up, and all will at some point in their life.

This is the bit I know some of Gaf will not understand; I knew that if my mum found out their marriage would be over. My Mum divorced her first husband when he cheated on her. She went back to uni as a mature student to study sociology and had very strong views on the sex industry.

But I made the decision not to tell. I had no proof and it would have wrecked my family. I didn't confront my Dad as I didn't know what the hell to say. I have also not told this to anyone, as I don't want them to think badly of my dad. And yes, I know he deserves it but...

I have no regrets at all. I don't even think about it most of the time, and it's been years now. But when I do, I always wonder if I did the right thing, or if it was just incredibly selfish and cowardly of me.

My parents are still together and seem pretty happy.

I only really bring it up because of the recent discussion about doozy, and if he should tell or nor. Sometimes, by not telling you minimise the wreckage. The fall out will be bad if he tells now or she tells later, and as they've both kept the secret for years, it might never come out.

He has nothing to gain from telling, except a clear conscience, and I don't think he really deserves that.
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Well, if it was an orgy what does the sex industry have to do with it? Maybe they're just swingers or something.
 
Not even sure if the thread is still active/alive/updated, or if you have my last confession in store somewhere, but here it goes again:

Ever since the last time I wrote, things have gotten real weird for me. I just can't get one of my wife's sisters out of my head. It seems like I think about her every day, and it's truly become an obsession. It's gotten so bad that I've actually come to the point of thinking of ways I could sneak off with her somewhere, although I know for a fact she would refuse any and all advances I could possibly make. Still, it's a feeling that's been bugging me for quite a while already. Some night I'll even dream her and stuff. I don't know, I am seriously starting to think something is wrong with me.
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So much pussy on so many pedestals here.
 
Imma a long time poster on neogaf, but, thats really all I do. I have to confess because im just so lonely. Im 21 and a typical basement dweller. I have borderline personality disorder and social anxiety. I've never had a job im overweight and pasty skinned and my family is ashamed of me. I havent had a real friend since 9th grade. In HS I sat by myself at the back of the cafeteria all alone. I made myself the obnoxious class clown just to get attention to be not so alone. I played MMOs way too much and eDated girls but due to my experience in not being able to talk to people they always failed miserably. In College, I went to a CC, and flunked out due to having no ambition, no desire. I have no core beliefs, I have no idea who I am. I'm a virgin, I'm pathetic. I spend all day on various forums doing things just to get attention, and i rarely get it so I do malicious things, I PK in MMOs, I harass people, even lie about myself because im just so absurdly lonely. I'm prone to very violent outbursts and once nearly broke my cats neck in a fit of blind rage a couple years back. In a fit of rage I broke my wrist with a hammer just to get out of going on a trip with my father I dont love. That hospital trip was what got ultimately evicted since we couldnt afford to pay the bills. My brother and sister have jobs and are successful, while I sit at home jerking it to amateur porn (i like romantic love and try to imagine im the guy) and hentai and posting on ngaf. I go days without bathing because i lack the motivation to even do that. Im very close to killing myself but i cant because im too weak to do it. I want to get a job but im afraid i wouldnt be able too because i have never handled money before i wouldnt be able to work a register because i dont know how to count money or do anything. i cant even order food without panicking. I cant seea therapist because my family is poor and we cant afford to get me help.

I cant do this much longer, my heart is in very bad shape, and my health is very poor. My teeth are rotting because I cant see a dentist either. Im so ashamed of myself, but, i have no willpower, no motivation, I feel trapped in a pool of despair. I have no idea who I am or what I want in life, my only goal was just to work retail like my mom and be miserable living paycheck to paycheck. I *sigh* often cry myself to sleep praying I can find the motivation the strength to finally change and be a man, but, it never comes and probably never will. Ill probably not be here much longer, if I dont die of a heart attack I'll die from just killing myself after my mom kicks me out for good.
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One hand working is better than two hands praying.

As I had said elsewhere set small goals achievable in a week or so and follow it through. That will help you not only achieve things but it will also help with self confidence.
 
I slept wit a girl and forgot to tell her I was infected with HIV. I got HIV from sharing a needle with a druggie at a crack house when i was 17 and into doing drugs. I was drunk, and 19 and doing a ton of drugs and met this cute girl at a bar, we hit it off and she told me her name and we were both drinking and went back to her place. We were both drunk and had sex. I woke up in the morning first and saw her next to me/realized I had unprotected sex with her. I panicked got dressed,and fled. Never to see her again. 8 years later my HIV is now AIDs, and i'm in the final stages of my life. My wife convinced me to join f-book, and so I out of sheer curiosity tracked her down on Facebook (i remembered her name): much to my horror I found she was a mom and doo to her HIV progressing to AIDs is succumbing to the infections. On her wall she constantly posts about how God gave it to her, and without it she never would have met her husband (who was killed in a car accident) and raised a beautiful son.
.
..................
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I'm thinking of going to visit her before she dies...I mean I don't have much longer to live either (my health is getting worse I undergo treatments to delay it, but, it's gotten worse. I still have many years left, but, it's still an expiration date, meaning i doubt I'll live another decade. Drs say with modern treatment they can delay it to well past 5 years, but, I dont believe them) it really wasn't my fault though, I wasn't in the right state of mind and it was an accident. Im nervous.

tl;dr: I slept with a girl and didnt use protection/got her infected with HIV, years later I'm dieing from AIDs and so is she. Tempted to go meet up with her again.
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Man, this seems too bad to be true. If it is, oh man....
 
ronito said:
Man, this seems too bad to be true. If it is, oh man....
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Just read first sentence so far. WHAT THE FUCK. Forgot????????

Ok finished, you "forget" your keys. You "forget" to bring your sun glass's with you. You don't just forget to tell a girl you have HIV, oh man hope this is a troll.
 
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