GAF.. Help me deal with it HIV

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M

Mieu

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Where do I start from picking up the pieces? It's really hard to deal with it. Can you help in clearing my mind?

Any form of feedback is appreciated.

Regards,
 
Damn.

The first thing is knowing that your life isn't over, and there's still a really great future ahead of you.

Someone nice told me that not too long ago.
 
It's a horrible virus that affects too many people. I'm guessing one of them is you. It sucks, but you gotta take your meds and do your best to understand that it isn't a death sentence anymore. You minimize risk to yourself and others that way, and you'll learn to live within the confines of the virus and it isn't the end of the world as you may think it to be now.
 
A nurse told me living with HIV is alot easier than living with diabetes, so that might make you feel better.

Unless you have both.
 
For what it's worth, it's easier to deal with it now, where a generation ago it may have been a death sentence. I give you my deepest and most sincere apology. I've had family members who have contracted the virus and I hope you find the will and strength to continue living.
 
hang in there bro, current meds and treatments make living with it very easy compared to year ago. for whatever you need gaf is here for you.
 
I think your best bet would be to join a support group. People who have been through what you are going through would provide the kind of support you need right now. Here, you'll just get a page or two or shitty quips and feigned pity.
 
Damn man, sorry to hear.

One of my friends who also happens to be one of the most vibrant, successful, kind, hilarious people I know is positive. We never really talked about it but he definitely leads one of the richest, fullest lives of anyone I know. I'm fairly sure he's been positive for a pretty long time and he seems healthy and looks great. Fuck, he won a Tony not too long ago.

Keep on living OP :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_v1vU7DgOs
 
If you live in a first world country, your life expectancy with HIV is almost normal and prospects continue to improve. That is not to say that this diagnosis will not change your life, but it is not the humongous deal that it once was.
 
Osteoperogies said:
Random question, but when you get tested, do they give you some indication of your t-cell count initially?
Click to expand...

That's the next batch of thest. Normally you go through the first test which is 95% accurate. A second test goes through and that validates the infection.

After confirmation, that's the time you need to know how grave your infection is. Part of it includes counting the T-Cells.


TheMan said:
I think your best bet would be to join a support group. People who have been through what you are going through would provide the kind of support you need right now. Here, you'll just get a page or two or shitty quips and feigned pity.
Click to expand...

Yeah there is one available. It's mainly helmed by volunteers from the LGBT community. At this point, you will just need all the support you can get. However shallow it is.

Fugu said:
If you live in a first world country, your life expectancy with HIV is almost normal and prospects continue to improve. That is not to say that this diagnosis will not change your life, but it is not the humongous deal that it once was.
Click to expand...

Unfortunately, not in a 1st World country. But yeah, thanks for making me realize that part. Good thing is that we can count on the government to at least should the ARV meds to keep life going.

Thanks for everyone. Every bit of encouragement helps. I'm afraid the infection is already severe. Fever and chills have been on and off for a month. Fungal infection is already evident.
 
GAF still loves and supports you bro. Always will.

Sure you're gonna have to take some extra precautions from now on, but it's nothing to be ashamed of. The human body isn't as impervious as we'd like it to be and illness/disease is a risk of living in general. Just do what you gotta do on the healthcare side of things and continue to live your life. Stay strong.
 
My best friend was diagnosed with HIV in 2008 and AIDS in 2009. I know it sounds like an impending sentence but its not. It's 2014 and he doesn't even seem like a different person. If anything, it seems like he has put his health first above everything and has become a better person. He's fitter in body and of mind and he is happy. In his relationship, his boyfriend is HIV neg and they plan on keeping it that way. Life changes but only so much.

If you take care of yourself, and do what is needed to take care of your needs over your wants, I am confident you'll get over it.
 
It's a scary disease to learn that you have, but always remember that is it treatable and there are many people who are virtually undetectable with today's medicine. It's no longer a life threatening illness, but one that you can live a normal life with.

Chin up, make sure you have a great support system, and just know that you'll become an old fart like the rest of us. :)
 
Loofy said:
A nurse told me living with HIV is alot easier than living with diabetes, so that might make you feel better.

Unless you have both.
Click to expand...
Only that it can greatly affect intimate relationships with people and can hold a stigma. For the OP, like others have said don't see this as a dead end and whatever the situation may be don't look for regret or blame.
 
I know 2 people with HIV who live pretty much perfectly normal lives (with some obvious exceptions due to keeping it in check and whatnot). It's tough but it hardly means the worst, OP. Not only can it be totally manageable but I also wouldnt be surprised if a straight up cure shows up sooner than later.
 
Keep your head up, OP! I don't have much advice to give other than talking about it with other people in a support group might help. Everything you're feeling and wanting to know is what these other people are feeling and experiencing. Having an outlet for your anxieties is going to help a lot.
 
I can't offer you anything other than a dancing guinea pig :(

35347521568c8a59f0.gif
 
The quality of meds is dramatically better than what it was even a decade ago. When I was in high school, we had a guy who came around to talk about it and he took literally 2 handfuls of pills. Today, they have combined meds which are just a pill or two, and there's really no limit to life expectancy with HIV.
 
Meditation has help me deal with many things in my life if you really want to clear your mind i encourage you to try meditation it wont be easy at first dealing with all those emotions but it will get easier if you practice.
 
keep your head up. it's not nearly as bad as it was 20 years ago. i know several people with it and they're fine. with proper medication it's become somewhat common for people to be have undetectable viral loads of it.
 
GAF love and support always.

I think everyone here has provided wonderful advice- I think a support group could go a long way in terms of adjusting/understanding how things may be different. Stay healthy, keep up with your treatment and stay strong.
 
I dunno, music always helps me. music is like mental morphine. Obvi I don't know what you're going thru but maybe.
 
If you're having problems dealing with it then visit your local hospital and speak with a nurse. They have a lot of information that may help you. Form a community group, there may be people like you dealing with the same things. Try and think on the positive side of life.
 
besides all of the good tips this thread has already provided, the most important thing is to not let anyone bring you down because of this or any disease. And try to love yourself as you are, HIV or not.
 
I have a close friend who was recently diagnosed.

There is a knee jerk reaction to HIV by people who don't have friends and family members who actually live with it, to see the reality of what it means to live today with consistent treatment.

You will life a full, fulfilling life, and barring roughly the same everyday dangers anyone else faces, can live to an old age -- older than some people without an illness, older than some people with another life altering one, older than some people who have HIV as well.

You will need to take care of yourself. You are probably a smart person, probably already doing so, and will just need to make a few adjustments.

You will live and love and laugh and you will not be alone now or in the future.

It's ok to be scared, that will get better. There are support groups and counselors and doctors who can hold your hand as you go through the steps to wrap your mind around it. It's what they do, and they are good at it, and they are available for you.

You are still you. Your life is still your life. If you haven't already, you can still find the love of your life. You can still raise beautiful children. You can still wake up everyday and tell someone you care about them or love them, and have them say the same in return.

This isn't a roadblock in your life. This is just a part of it.
 
I was listening to Dan Savage's podcast recently, and there were a few stats about HIV-positive folks that I was really surprised (and glad to hear):

1. It really isn't the death sentence it once was. You *can* live with HIV with proper medication and precautions. Having HIV isn't going to preclude you from having a full life. You can totally still live to be a crabby, insane 90-year-old.

2. If you're on your meds, you can pretty much eliminate your viral load and pose no danger to your sexual partners. You should still use condoms to be safe (because, hey, you don't know what THEY have), but you aren't a leper. You can be sexually active with HIV and still be responsible.

3. If you're depressed about the prospect of having to "come out" as HIV positive to every partner you have down the line, there are apparently a number of dating sites and communities of other folks who are positive. You are not even mildly alone.

The big thing to remember is that you're not damaged goods. Think of it this way - you just have some pills and check-ups you've got to be mindful of. My brother had thyroid cancer a couple years ago. As a result of his thyroid being mostly removed, he's got to take hormone supplements for the rest of his life and get annual check-ups to make sure the cancer isn't back and to make sure his hormones are aligned. From a routine standpoint, you and my brother are pretty much going to be exactly the same. And you wouldn't consider him damaged goods, right?

You're going to be alive when you wake up tomorrow. And you should feel empowered because how you choose to live that day is completely up to you.
 
meltingparappa said:
I have a close friend who was recently diagnosed.

There is a knee jerk reaction to HIV by people who don't have friends and family members who actually live with it, to see the reality of what it means to live today with consistent treatment.

You will life a full, fulfilling life, and barring roughly the same everyday dangers anyone else faces, can live to an old age -- older than some people without an illness, older than some people with another life altering one, older than some people who have HIV as well.

You will need to take care of yourself. You are probably a smart person, probably already doing so, and will just need to make a few adjustments.

You will live and love and laugh and you will not be alone now or in the future.

It's ok to be scared, that will get better. There are support groups and counselors and doctors who can hold your hand as you go through the steps to wrap your mind around it. It's what they do, and they are good at it, and they are available for you.

You are still you. Your life is still your life. If you haven't already, you can still find the love of your life. You can still raise beautiful children. You can still wake up everyday and tell someone you care about them or love them, and have them say the same in return.

This isn't a roadblock in your life. This is just a part of it.
Click to expand...

Great post!
 
Mieu said:
That's the next batch of thest. Normally you go through the first test which is 95% accurate. A second test goes through and that validates the infection.

After confirmation, that's the time you need to know how grave your infection is. Part of it includes counting the T-Cells.




Yeah there is one available. It's mainly helmed by volunteers from the LGBT community. At this point, you will just need all the support you can get. However shallow it is.



Unfortunately, not in a 1st World country. But yeah, thanks for making me realize that part. Good thing is that we can count on the government to at least should the ARV meds to keep life going.

Thanks for everyone. Every bit of encouragement helps. I'm afraid the infection is already severe. Fever and chills have been on and off for a month. Fungal infection is already evident.
Click to expand...

Where are you from OP? When did you start to first notice symptoms? Could work help you out?
 
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