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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|
- Thread starter Replicant
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FoneBone said:
So, what are those men supposed to do? Just have thousands of messages from men they aren't attracted to pile up instead of "cutting the bullshit" and saying outright "sorry, <type> isn't my type?"
I mean this is what I'm trying to wrap my mind around. These men are supposed to just date/fuck other races/type of men they aren't attracted to because saying they're not into those men is being a "douche?"
Kyon said:
I gotta be getting to "work," in a minute but I'm going to leave this discussion for later.
Suffice it to say: OKCupid has a race type, but no "looking for" race/types and the like. Grindr (from those screenshots) is VERY BAREBONES and doesn't let you give your preferences.
I feel this is a problem with dating sites in general. They don't let you outright state what you're looking for at times. So stating your turn-offs seems "douche" but it's trying to save people that aren't your type and yourself time from being told "no, sorry."
Maybe I'm just too much of an asshole. *shrug* Like I said, I don't see the issue with it because there really is no better way (currently, anyway) to give your dislikes out since there is no "wants."
~RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
Grimmy said:
From every man to muscle man. They Chris Redfield'ed him.
I like that hand with the coin in front of him. So random, ha.
As for the whole 'not into X', do you really get 1000s of messages from people you're not interested in? I mean seriously, just don't reply or block and that's it.
I mean if you're really bothered by having to spend 3 secs ignoring a message, then I guess you somehow deserve to be called douchey.
As for the whole 'not into X', do you really get 1000s of messages from people you're not interested in? I mean seriously, just don't reply or block and that's it.
I mean if you're really bothered by having to spend 3 secs ignoring a message, then I guess you somehow deserve to be called douchey.
I am infinitely horny.
Why are there no gay guys my age in this city... I've never even been in a relationship and I'm 18. This is a tragedy. D:
Oh and on a side note: People should just say "masculine" instead of "straight acting". "Straight acting" means nothing at all. I honestly know a lot of really feminine straight guys. If someone described them would they call them "gay acting"? No (well maybe if the person saying it is a huge homophobe), they'd call them feminine. Use the right words damn it.
Why are there no gay guys my age in this city... I've never even been in a relationship and I'm 18. This is a tragedy. D:
Oh and on a side note: People should just say "masculine" instead of "straight acting". "Straight acting" means nothing at all. I honestly know a lot of really feminine straight guys. If someone described them would they call them "gay acting"? No (well maybe if the person saying it is a huge homophobe), they'd call them feminine. Use the right words damn it.
I haven't slept in 2 1/2 days due to exams, ignore my rambling...
I'm 29 and I've never been in a relationship (as in date, going out, etc.) if you meant "just sex"; then at 23 was my "first".Yaceka said:
***
In any case, I don't like the whole term of "str8 atcing" neither. I know is used to "identify" as "obvious" or "not so obvious" more than anything...
But in my case; while others consider me as straight acting is nonsense; because I'm not "acting". I'm not pretending to be someone I'm not.
Which is why I don't like the term; but understand the use of it; though it always varies. I mean; I've seen guys across multiple websites identifying themselves as "str8 acting" yet; even my mom is more "str8 acting".
Souldriver
Member
There's something disproportioned about it anyway. His head is too small for his body, and/or his stance is really weird.Delio said:
i guess it's just another way to term gay guys that are not as flamboyant. i don't really find it offensive, but i've been told i was not straight-acting enough by the last guy i dated. The guy i'm dating now says i am his type because i am straight-acting among other things. i'm confused, am i, or am i not "straight-acting"? lol
FoneBone said:
I'm guessing you haven't had the persistant type that won't take "NO" for an answer before.
But let's turn this around and flip it: Is it that bad that I want to ignore people that I'm not interested in and am upfront about not being interested in them?
Except that ONTD article says I'm/people that have racial preferences are a "douche" because we put those racial preferences (though, in the most part, negatives for "excludes") out front for people to read instead of hiding them and being polite and taking thousands of messages from people we may not "click" with. Which is relevant to my first. Why should I put up with messages and advances from people I'm not interested in?
Again: I don't prefer black/african american dudes. I'm sure there is plenty of "hot" ones around, but they do nothing for me. Why shouldn't I be upfront and say "Sorry, I'm not interested in Black guys. Don't bother trying to get with me if you're black?" It "cuts the bullshit," and while it sounds rude it's not meant to be rude (in general, I hope).
FoneBone said:
Ding ding ding.
I tend to really dislike those profiles. Even if I end up fitting the bill I'm turned off. It's says a lot about character - that a person would be so into themselves to think that they have to set up a filter against the hordes of undesirables that are just aching to get at them.
If I bother looking past your nudes and your stats to actually read your profile, I wanna know about YOU. Not a laundry list of things you don't like.
Sorry to break your heart 3D render lovers. But it's FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE FAKE:
http://forums.naughtydog.com/t5/Gen...-cover-legit/m-p/578245/highlight/true#M35855
A composite of Jake Gylelelelenhall's chest and Drake's pose from the trailer. That explains the weird "Coin of Cum" hand pose. If Elena was trying to protect Drake's modesty, she's doing a bad job of it.
DarkUSS said:
Watch and see Naughty Dog including "Shirtless Doughnut Drake" as a costume to troll everyone.
I'm guessing that I figured out that it took about one second to block them.TheSeks said:
I'm not talking about having racial preferences, I'm talking about how you express them. It comes across as hostile to spend too much time on negatives. Even if I agree with the preferences in question, it's a huge turn-off.
MidnightScott
Banned
It's so cold out here in Houston (54 degrees) that my nipples are hard. lol
Also :O at Nathan Drake, *fap fap fap*
Also :O at Nathan Drake, *fap fap fap*
Ugh, what a dumb situation.
Going out with a guy tomorrow (Mike, for the sake of this). I was chatting with a different guy tonight (let's say, John) that I had a date with once (never went anywhere, but we chat online on occasion and stay in touch), and randomly mentioned my new date Mike. Fast-forward, John had a date/sleepover with Mike, which ended abruptly over something dumb.
Apparently, John's wanted to reach out to Mike again recently, but didn't know he was single. Now he's learned I'm about to go on a date with him, and I strongly suspect he's going to try and sabotage this somehow so that he can get a crack at him again. He's made it really clear that he now 'has mixed feelings about the situation', and I feel like, what little I know about his personality, that he'd go for it and screw me over. We're not really friends at all, like I said. Just acquaintances that had a date that didn't work out. Like...I could see him make up a lie about me in a conversation with Mike, or whatever.
Do I even bring John up at all?
If Mike suddenly acts flakey or disappears on me or something, I'll probably get all neurotic crazy that something was said. lol
Going out with a guy tomorrow (Mike, for the sake of this). I was chatting with a different guy tonight (let's say, John) that I had a date with once (never went anywhere, but we chat online on occasion and stay in touch), and randomly mentioned my new date Mike. Fast-forward, John had a date/sleepover with Mike, which ended abruptly over something dumb.
Apparently, John's wanted to reach out to Mike again recently, but didn't know he was single. Now he's learned I'm about to go on a date with him, and I strongly suspect he's going to try and sabotage this somehow so that he can get a crack at him again. He's made it really clear that he now 'has mixed feelings about the situation', and I feel like, what little I know about his personality, that he'd go for it and screw me over. We're not really friends at all, like I said. Just acquaintances that had a date that didn't work out. Like...I could see him make up a lie about me in a conversation with Mike, or whatever.
Do I even bring John up at all?
If Mike suddenly acts flakey or disappears on me or something, I'll probably get all neurotic crazy that something was said. lol
Hecatonchires Custom
Member
TheSeks said:
OMG I think I've had the worst possible date with that type of guy.
I've met the guy online and talked to him for a few weeks before arranging an actual date. Since the weather was pretty bad, we decided to have a nice indian dinner at my place and watch movies and shit. Since he's from another city, he came down by bus and I met him down at the station. But the moment he stepped out of the bus, I knew that it wouldn't work. Guy barely looked like the pics he sent me, had a super raspy and annoying voice and acted like a dick.
On the way back to my place, he tells me that he's a university student majoring in social sciences and that his thesis is about the homosexual love quest or something. I mostly let him talk at that point because I just don't really care about maintaining a decent conversation with him.
When we finally back to my apartment, he took off his shoes, revealing massive boils all over his feet and since he had no socks, the smell was really awesome. And then I noticed that he had a really bad case of crusty dry skin around his mouth and an awful breath. Ugh.
So we start eating and I feel bad for him already because I know it's not gonna work out but he seems to like me a lot. After we're done, we end up in the living room, he's on the couch but I'm sitting on my computer chair cuz I don't wanna sit next to him. He catches on to that and tries to touch me. Now, I can't fake very well when I have no interest in someone or something and he saw that immediately. But since we had to wait until the next bus so that he can leave, for the next 2 hours I had to explain the reasons why I wasn't into him. He kept quoting his damn thesis about how gays are afraid of commitment and why I should give him a chance. Guy just wouldn't take no for an answer. He kept asking the same questions over and over again and tried to analyze my every reaction or movement. The worst part was that I had to constantly lie when he'd ask if I thought he was ugly or fat; I really didn't want to hurt his feelings. Longest 2 hours of my fucking life, I swear.
Hmmm..Magnus said:
If it was me, I'll bring it up; but casually. Just for the sake of avoiding possible gossips and rumors; kinda like "damage control". At what moment of the date, I don't know. If "John" is as you describe it, and would try to sabotage stuff; he'll probably use/say something about you based on that one time and make things up.
MidnightScott
Banned
Hecatonchires Custom said:
That's when you excuse yourself to the bathroom and text a friend and ask them to call your house phone (if you have one) and say that it's an emergency lol. I know it's wrong but I would want something done for me if I was on a horrible "date".
Hecatonchires Custom
Member
MidnightScott said:
I don't have a cell and I don't think I would've done that anyway, I felt pretty bad for him (at the time).
Hecatonchires Custom
Member
FoneBone said:
The weather was beyond horrible and my town is an extremely boring place. I dunno, it was an alright idea at the time. /shrug
Hecatonchires Custom
Member
Gvaz said:
Guy took a 2 hours bus ride and turning him down as soon as I saw him would've been a huge dick move on my part. I was way too empathic for my sake back then.
SpaceBridge
Member
Argh. So fucking annoying. If youre not interested then quit sending me messages online. Im too old to be wasting time. Or at least respond to the one where Im asking you straight up if your not interested, cuz I can see when you were last online. Dumb fucks.
/end rant.
/end rant.
Masked Man
I said wow
Re: preferences on dating sites:
I tend to agree with those who express the sentiment that it's reasonable to mention that you aren't into X or Y--so long as that's not the only thing you list in your profile. I've had numerous messages from larger men (not for me), some of whom are at least 10 years older than me (also not for me). There's no nice way to say, "Sorry, not interested," so I tend to just ignore those messages. On the other hand, I'm also not interested in just hooking up with you, so I don't care about your chiseled body if all I know about you is that you don't like Asian guys or guys with tattoos.
And, speaking of dating sites, I'm meeting with someone next week. :3 We met on Jack'd (his picture was a cute cubic Ness), and we've been emailing back and forth over the summer. I'm back in Japan now, so I'm using my vacation to visit friends and (host) family members from when I studied abroad. He just so happens to live in that area, so we're meeting up on Saturday and spending the afternoon together. I really like him so far; hopefully things go well next week! (Plus, his favorite game is Mother 2/Earthbound, and mine is Mother 3. We must be soulmates!)
I tend to agree with those who express the sentiment that it's reasonable to mention that you aren't into X or Y--so long as that's not the only thing you list in your profile. I've had numerous messages from larger men (not for me), some of whom are at least 10 years older than me (also not for me). There's no nice way to say, "Sorry, not interested," so I tend to just ignore those messages. On the other hand, I'm also not interested in just hooking up with you, so I don't care about your chiseled body if all I know about you is that you don't like Asian guys or guys with tattoos.
And, speaking of dating sites, I'm meeting with someone next week. :3 We met on Jack'd (his picture was a cute cubic Ness), and we've been emailing back and forth over the summer. I'm back in Japan now, so I'm using my vacation to visit friends and (host) family members from when I studied abroad. He just so happens to live in that area, so we're meeting up on Saturday and spending the afternoon together. I really like him so far; hopefully things go well next week! (Plus, his favorite game is Mother 2/Earthbound, and mine is Mother 3. We must be soulmates!)
Hecatonchires Custom
Member
Gvaz said:
Yeah probably. Now that I think about it, I haven't done that ever since, which is good.
The Broken Ska Record
Member
Wait, who are these people?fernoca said:Facebook keeps doing it!
I just wanted to come in to say that I'm really happy right now. Things with my guy is going really well and really cute. I spent most of the day with him just driving around LA to different places. Nothing sexual happened at all except maybe a butt pinch every now and then, but it felt really really good to connect really well on a level beyond physical and sexual attraction. When it was time to say goodbye, i dropped him off to rehearse with his band. We chatted a bit in the car and then he leaned in for a kiss, and i swear it was the most heartwarming kiss i've ever experienced, and there wasn't even tongue involved. The way we kissed just felt so genuinely caring. Ahhhhhhhh i can't describe it lol./my cheesy story
Facebook recommending me people to add to my list of friends.The Broken Ska Record said:
ciD_Vain said:
/my cheesy story
Send him here!!!
The Broken Ska Record
Member
Oh so just random people? I get that all the time. I don't even know who they are. D:fernoca said:Facebook recommending me people to add to my list of friends.
umop_3pisdn
Member
Does anyone else want to love temporarily? I don't mean love as in sex but more so all of those romantic notions... I think my perfect romance would be the kind that ends a little too soon, because really I just want to experience it and then continue on with my life with richer memories from the experience.
I only ask because I wonder how fair (or realistic) this plan of mine is I'm generally always honest with people, so I'd be upfront about this, but I kind of wonder how many people would understand why, let alone go for that. I honestly believe that I'm meant to walk a more solitary path in life, yet still I just want to know that I could be something else for a season or two, in part to kill my curiosity.
I only ask because I wonder how fair (or realistic) this plan of mine is
I'm generally always honest with people, so I'd be upfront about this, but I kind of wonder how many people would understand why, let alone go for that. I honestly believe that I'm meant to walk a more solitary path in life, yet still I just want to know that I could be something else for a season or two, in part to kill my curiosity.I know a lot of older people who used to believe the same thing as you. They eventually found someone perfect for them after a while of short relationships and ended up falling in love for years because he/she was the "exception". 2 of the 3 are still together. The couple that broke up was due to one of them moving away.umop_3pisdn said:Does anyone else want to love temporarily? I don't mean love as in sex but more so all of those romantic notions... I think my perfect romance would be the kind that ends a little too soon, because really I just want to experience it and then continue on with my life with richer memories from the experience.
I only ask because I wonder how fair (or realistic) this plan of mine is
I don't think telling someone this would work out in the long run. Maybe it's just because I hear a lot of people my age say "I want a short amazing romance" when they usually just mean "I don't want to be stuck in a relationship where it gets boring or is full of arguments with someone I don't like anymore". If you really go and tell someone this, you need to tell them specifically what you want. They might get the wrong idea otherwise.
Sorry for the half-awake rambling. I'm not sure if what I said even made sense. Bleh.
umop_3pisdn
Member
Yaceka said:
That does make sense, thank you, I found your response to be quite interesting... but I think my situation is a little different (doesn't everyone, lol). I eventually want to become a Buddhist monk, or if not that some sort of lay equivalent, so eventually I plan to renounce sex and to only keep platonic relationships, etc. I do have a somewhat romantic personality, but my vocational choice trumps that for philosophical reasons... but still I'm curious. In the end if I 'settled' for love, even if it was everything that I could want, I think I'd ultimately be disappointed in myself since I would be stopping so short of my goal (the elimination of craving/tanha)... so it's a sort of situation where, even if I found a person that I'd be happy to spend the rest of my life with, I still hope that I'd leave
http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showpost.php?p=31983055&postcount=6462
New pic of me. (because i can advertise)
New pic of me. (because i can advertise)
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