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Gay and Bisexual relationship thread |OT|

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Sseklebeast said:
Aw. :) I was there last year to visit some relatives and go to this political snafu that my dad attends every year in Lares. It was uhh interesting.. Lol
Ah yeah! XD
Though I usually go to Lares with friends, for the icecream. I go for the basic flavors, but they got codfish and rice & beans.
 
fernoca said:
Ah yeah! XD
Though I usually go to Lares with friends, for the icecream. I still go for the basic flavors, but they got codfish and rice & beans.

Ooh yeah I got ice cream when I was there! :) I saw some Arroz con gondules flavored ice cream but I didn't have the balls to try it. :p The flavor I picked was pink but I forgot what the heck it was. :( I remember my head was shaved at that time and my head ended up getting scorched lol. It was pretty funny. :P
 
Sseklebeast said:
Ooh yeah I got ice cream when I was there! :) I saw some Arroz con gondules flavored ice cream but I didn't have the balls to try it. :p The flavor I picked was pink but I forgot what the heck it was. :( I remember my head was shaved at that time and my head ended up getting scorched lol. It was pretty funny. :P
Hahaha, welcome (back) to PR. :p

I usually shave my head, but my skin got used the the temperatures/sun I guess. :p
 
fernoca said:
Hahaha, welcome (back) to PR. :p

I usually shave my head, but my skin got used the the temperatures/sun I guess. :p

Yeah it was a nice return. The last time I was there I was 8 years old so was nice to see it again. My sister , her husband and I stayed at a pretty nice hotel while my dad stayed at his sisters.. Hotel was right on the beach so I was like "AHHHHH yes!" haha .. The best part was going in the pool and seeing iguanas walking around freely. They were so cute! >.<

I hope to go back there again soon .. I'm pretty sure my dad is going back this month for Grito de Lares. We'll see :>
 
Sseklebeast said:
Hah imagine if I told him I was into anime??? The horror!
I feel like a triple minority in that sense [gay black and a nerd] and while the topic of being gay and nerds are at hand, does anyone here have plans to go to New York comic con in October? It would be cool if some of us were able to meet and have fun somewhere and be all nerdy and gay.
 
Sseklebeast said:
Recently this young gay dude I met on MH said "You play games? You're one of those?!?" Yep, I'm one of those, whatever those are anwyay.. :p
I'm too far gone. MH = Monster Hunter to me :P

But, yeah, add me to the [video game] nerd list. I watch some anime here and there, though.
 
chronos4590 said:
I feel like a triple minority in that sense [gay black and a nerd] and while the topic of being gay and nerds are at hand, does anyone here have plans to go to New York comic con in October? It would be cool if some of us were able to meet and have fun somewhere and be all nerdy and gay.

I went last year and I am thinking about going again this year. I hope the Anime Con portion will be bigger this year though.

*edit*

dragonlife said:
I'm too far gone. MH = Monster Hunter to me :P

But, yeah, add me to the [video game] nerd list. I watch some anime here and there, though.

Aw lol. Sorry MH = Manhunt. I don't go on there much anymore though..log in once in awhile to check messages.

Do you play Monster Hunter 3 Tri dragon?
 
chronos4590 said:
I feel like a triple minority in that sense [gay black and a nerd] and while the topic of being gay and nerds are at hand, does anyone here have plans to go to New York comic con in October? It would be cool if some of us were able to meet and have fun somewhere and be all nerdy and gay.
I'm actually planning a trip to new York this October! When is comic con, and how much are tickets? I'm from Virginia but I have a few black gay nerd friends who would all want to go too. We could like, be a clique of "those guys"
 
Sseklebeast said:
Aw lol. Sorry MH = Manhunt. I don't go on there much anymore though..log in once in awhile to check messages.

Do you play Monster Hunter 3 Tri dragon?
I would, if someone I know would play. We've had it since last year but we're still HR 4, I think. I haven't played it and concentrated on other stuff, but I really just want to play it now. I'm trying to convince another friend to get it, but he's always broke.

:(

Do you play it?
 
The Abominable Snowman said:
I'm actually planning a trip to new York this October! When is comic con, and how much are tickets? I'm from Virginia but I have a few black gay nerd friends who would all want to go too. We could like, be a clique of "those guys"

It's October 13th-16th and each days has different ticket prices. If you buy before September 16th you get a discount. Prices are here : http://www.newyorkcomiccon.com/Buy-Tickets/

dragonlife said:
I would, if someone I know would play. We've had it since last year but we're still HR 4, I think. I haven't played it and concentrated on other stuff, but i really just want to play it. I'm trying to convince another friend to get, but he's always broke.

:(

Do you play it?

I play it still yes. Not as often as I used to but I was on earlier tonight and was having fun helping some people out. I'm HR 122 but I can always buy some old gear if you did not want me to kill stuff easily. :)
 
The Abominable Snowman said:
I'm actually planning a trip to new York this October! When is comic con, and how much are tickets? I'm from Virginia but I have a few black gay nerd friends who would all want to go too. We could like, be a clique of "those guys"
October 13-16. For 3 days Friday Saturday and Sunday its $65 other wise Friday and Sunday is $35 and Saturday is $50. And buy them before September 16th or you have to wait on that massive line at the Javits Center. For $85 you can go on Thursday[the preshow]- Sunday. But thats too much comic con for me + I'll be pooped from class.
Edit: Well got dayumn i was beat but yes all relevant information is still relevant
 
Sseklebeast said:
.

Recently this young gay dude I met on MH said "You play games? You're one of those?!?" Yep, I'm one of those, whatever those are anwyay.. :p
I always tell about the videogames as soon as possible, before the first date if possible.

"If you wanna be my boyfriend, you better play videogames" ala Spice Girls :P
 
Jezan said:
I always tell about the videogames as soon as possible, before the first date if possible.

"If you wanna be my boyfriend, you better play videogames" ala Spice Girls :P

Rofl I should have done that with my first boyfriend. I only hid it from him because he turned out to be 12 years older than me ( long story ) and I knew he didn't like it.
 
oh my god. cutest thing happened to me today... throughout the whole day, i've been having a text message conversation with disneyland guy. i've never actually met him yet in person as we've met on Grindr and since then we've exchanged numbers and have just been talking through text messages. while i was at work, he texts me saying how he wants to see me but he currently has no car. i asked him if he wanted me to pick him up, but he said he wouldn't want me to drive really late at night just to hang out for a little bit, and then drop him back home, so i said ok maybe next time. an hour and a half before i got off of work he texts me "surprise!" then "i don't see you" and i reply "huh? don't mess with me, you're not here. i don't see you!" he replies, "oh...i think i'm at the wrong one..." he tried surprising me with a visit at work but ended up at the wrong Starbucks...LOL. funny thing is, he ended up at the one my brother works at. I told him that the one i work at is literally all the way down the other side, 2 cities over. he says that he's sorry he failed, but i replied saying at least you tried. he tells me he's going to the gym since that was his original plan, and i let him be so he can work out without me bugging him.

20 minutes later, he sends me a text saying "i see you :)" i look outside the window and he's sitting outside smiling back at me. my face flushed red and my coworker starts wondering what's wrong with me. Haha. i tell him that i'm off in an hour, and he says that he'll wait for me. that last hour had my heart pounding. he's even hotter in real life, his smile is even cuter up close, and his personality is not nearly as "bad boy" as i pictured. i was so nervous to actually spend time with him in person that i kept dropping things at work and tripping over stuff. after i got off, i go outside and i see him sitting in a truck. he tells me that his sister let him borrow her truck which is how he got to see me. he tells me that i'm so cute that i make him nervous and intimidated. i couldn't help myself because at one point we caught each other just staring and smiling, admiring each other's company. it was a really cute first meeting and it went a lot better than i had imagined.

he asks me out on a dinner date but i tell him i don't want to go with my work clothes on. he says he doesn't care and thinks i look cute in it. lol. we eventually decide for some fast food at Sonics; he buys me my food and we sit down and have our first personal talk. we talk about our families, where we came from, and our previous relationships. he got really sad when he started talking about his recent car accident that caused him to start taking physical therapy classes, so i hugged him and he embraced me so warmly- we didn't let go for a good while, we just kept hugging and it felt so good. eventually, our little date ended. before he went to the truck, he motioned for a hand shake and said "it's nice to finally meet you", he smiled and then walked off.

nothing like this has ever happened to me and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. i really can't wait for disneyland now :)
 
ciD_Vain said:
oh my god. cutest thing happened to me today... throughout the whole day, i've been having a text message conversation with disneyland guy. i've never actually met him yet in person as we've met on Grindr and since then we've exchanged numbers and have just been talking through text messages. while i was at work, he texts me saying how he wants to see me but he currently has no car. i asked him if he wanted me to pick him up, but he said he wouldn't want me to drive really late at night just to hang out for a little bit, and then drop him back home, so i said ok maybe next time. an hour and a half before i got off of work he texts me "surprise!" then "i don't see you" and i reply "huh? don't mess with me, you're not here. i don't see you!" he replies, "oh...i think i'm at the wrong one..." he tried surprising me with a visit at work but ended up at the wrong Starbucks...LOL. funny thing is, he ended up at the one my brother works at. I told him that the one i work at is literally all the way down the other side, 2 cities over. he says that he's sorry he failed, but i replied saying at least you tried. he tells me he's going to the gym since that was his original plan, and i let him be so he can work out without me bugging him.

20 minutes later, he sends me a text saying "i see you :)" i look outside the window and he's sitting outside smiling back at me. my face flushed red and my coworker starts wondering what's wrong with me. Haha. i tell him that i'm off in an hour, and he says that he'll wait for me. that last hour had my heart pounding. he's even hotter in real life, his smile is even cuter up close, and his personality is not nearly as "bad boy" as i pictured. i was so nervous to actually spend time with him in person that i kept dropping things at work and tripping over stuff. after i got off, i go outside and i see him sitting in a truck. he tells me that his sister let him borrow her truck which is how he got to see me. he tells me that i'm so cute that i make him nervous and intimidated. i couldn't help myself because at one point we caught each other just staring and smiling, admiring each other's company. it was a really cute first meeting and it went a lot better than i had imagined.

he asks me out on a dinner date but i tell him i don't want to go with my work clothes on. he says he doesn't care and thinks i look cute in it. lol. we eventually decide for some fast food at Sonics; he buys me my food and we sit down and have our first personal talk. we talk about our families, where we came from, and our previous relationships. he got really sad when he started talking about his recent car accident that caused him to start taking physical therapy classes, so i hugged him and he embraced me so warmly- we didn't let go for a good while, we just kept hugging and it felt so good. eventually, our little date ended. before he went to the truck, he motioned for a hand shake and said "it's nice to finally meet you", he smiled and then walked off.

nothing like this has ever happened to me and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. i really can't wait for disneyland now :)
These are all very good signs, methinks.
 
How much can you press your SO to come out to his parents without being an asshole? We've been together for a year and we've lived together for six months, and I feel it's time for him to take some responsibility. I'm completely open myself and I feel like I'm done with lies, pretending etc. Some days I feel like it's completely up to him, that he should come out in his own pace and all that, and some days I'm in Dan Savage-mode (meaning, force him to man the fuck up).

It just annoying (if not hurtful) to go from partners living together one day, to pretending to be just another friend the next.

I've met both his parents btw and they're cool people so it's not like they're going to disown him...
 
moniker said:
How much can you press your SO to come out to his parents without being an asshole? We've been together for a year and we've lived together for six months, and I feel it's time for him to take some responsibility. I'm completely open myself and I feel like I'm done with lies, pretending etc. Some days I feel like it's completely up to him, that he should come out in his own pace and all that, and some days I'm in Dan Savage-mode (meaning, force him to man the fuck up).

It just annoying (if not hurtful) to go from partners living together one day, to pretending to be just another friend the next.

I've met both his parents btw and they're cool people so it's not like they're going to disown him...

In my opinion you should encourage him but not force him. Coming out is a very personal decision and outing him to his family will most likely have negative repercussions on your relationship.

Has he any reason for not coming out to his parents? Are they valid at all? Try to reason with him and tell him that you'll be there for him whatever happens. Coming out is daunting for some people, I'm sure it was to you so maybe try to understand where he's coming from.

Also, how old is he? Is he independent financially?
 
ciD_Vain said:
oh my god. cutest thing happened to me today... throughout the whole day, i've been having a text message conversation with disneyland guy. i've never actually met him yet in person as we've met on Grindr and since then we've exchanged numbers and have just been talking through text messages. while i was at work, he texts me saying how he wants to see me but he currently has no car. i asked him if he wanted me to pick him up, but he said he wouldn't want me to drive really late at night just to hang out for a little bit, and then drop him back home, so i said ok maybe next time. an hour and a half before i got off of work he texts me "surprise!" then "i don't see you" and i reply "huh? don't mess with me, you're not here. i don't see you!" he replies, "oh...i think i'm at the wrong one..." he tried surprising me with a visit at work but ended up at the wrong Starbucks...LOL. funny thing is, he ended up at the one my brother works at. I told him that the one i work at is literally all the way down the other side, 2 cities over. he says that he's sorry he failed, but i replied saying at least you tried. he tells me he's going to the gym since that was his original plan, and i let him be so he can work out without me bugging him.

20 minutes later, he sends me a text saying "i see you :)" i look outside the window and he's sitting outside smiling back at me. my face flushed red and my coworker starts wondering what's wrong with me. Haha. i tell him that i'm off in an hour, and he says that he'll wait for me. that last hour had my heart pounding. he's even hotter in real life, his smile is even cuter up close, and his personality is not nearly as "bad boy" as i pictured. i was so nervous to actually spend time with him in person that i kept dropping things at work and tripping over stuff. after i got off, i go outside and i see him sitting in a truck. he tells me that his sister let him borrow her truck which is how he got to see me. he tells me that i'm so cute that i make him nervous and intimidated. i couldn't help myself because at one point we caught each other just staring and smiling, admiring each other's company. it was a really cute first meeting and it went a lot better than i had imagined.

he asks me out on a dinner date but i tell him i don't want to go with my work clothes on. he says he doesn't care and thinks i look cute in it. lol. we eventually decide for some fast food at Sonics; he buys me my food and we sit down and have our first personal talk. we talk about our families, where we came from, and our previous relationships. he got really sad when he started talking about his recent car accident that caused him to start taking physical therapy classes, so i hugged him and he embraced me so warmly- we didn't let go for a good while, we just kept hugging and it felt so good. eventually, our little date ended. before he went to the truck, he motioned for a hand shake and said "it's nice to finally meet you", he smiled and then walked off.

nothing like this has ever happened to me and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. i really can't wait for disneyland now :)
this made my day! happy for you :)
 
Alcoori said:
In my opinion you should encourage him but not force him. Coming out is a very personal decision and outing him to his family will most likely have negative repercussions on your relationship.

Has he any reason for not coming out to his parents? Are they valid at all? Try to reason with him and tell him that you'll be there for him whatever happens. Coming out is daunting for some people, I'm sure it was to you so maybe try to understand where he's coming from.

Also, how old is he? Is he independent financially?

Of course I would never actually force him (like giving him an ultimatum) or out him without his consent. Yes, he's independent financially, he's soon to be 30. I don't think he has any other reason than cowardice to be honest. But he's the stoic kind and if I bring it up he doesn't have anything to say to me on the subject.

I do try to understand were he's coming from, and I know it can be hard, but we're both soon 30 and living together. I just feel that if intends to stick with me, telling his parents shouldn't be that hard, especially at our age ...

Oh well, I guess it's not that big of a deal (in day-to-day life), even if I'd rather be part of his family.
 
moniker said:
How much can you press your SO to come out to his parents without being an asshole? We've been together for a year and we've lived together for six months, and I feel it's time for him to take some responsibility. I'm completely open myself and I feel like I'm done with lies, pretending etc. Some days I feel like it's completely up to him, that he should come out in his own pace and all that, and some days I'm in Dan Savage-mode (meaning, force him to man the fuck up).

It just annoying (if not hurtful) to go from partners living together one day, to pretending to be just another friend the next.

I've met both his parents btw and they're cool people so it's not like they're going to disown him...
He's more likely to feel comfortable coming out to his parents if you're supporting him instead of putting pressure on him. And that's the right thing to do anyway.
 
moniker said:
Of course I would never actually force him (like giving him an ultimatum) or out him without his consent. Yes, he's independent financially, he's soon to be 30. I don't think he has any other reason than cowardice to be honest. But he's the stoic kind and if I bring it up he doesn't have anything to say to me on the subject.

I do try to understand were he's coming from, and I know it can be hard, but we're both soon 30 and living together. I just feel that if intends to stick with me, telling his parents shouldn't be that hard, especially at our age ...

Oh well, I guess it's not that big of a deal (in day-to-day life), even if I'd rather be part of his family.

Umm, I'm going to have to play devils advocate here and ask why the hell not drop an ultimatum?

As a general rule, you're shouldn't out people who are struggling with their sexuality, but I'll never understand our community's insistence on treating closeted gays with kids gloves. With all due respect, your partner is a grown-ass-man who is actually living with you. He is not some shy 14-year-old in a small-town high school who doesn't yet know that it gets better.

Sounds like he's gotten comfortable having his cake and eating it too, if you ask me. And, as with most things in life, sometimes it takes pressure to do what you know is right. I'd say it's high time to start lighting a fire under that ass. But that's just me.

It really depends on how much you're willing to tolerate, and how you want to live your life. Remember that. You're in the relationship, too. It isn't solely up to him to dictate the dynamics of it. Yes, you made the choice to enter into a relationship with him knowing he was closeted. But you could also follow that up with the decision to leave his ass. I'd let him know that.

I was in a relationship with a closeted guy when I was in college. At first it was exciting. But the closer we got, the more I wanted to be a part of his life. He was a part of my life as much as he wanted to be. Met all my friends. Some of my family. But I was always kept at arms-length with the people in his life, because he wasn't "ready" yet. But he swore one day that he would be, so I put up with it.

And then one weekend he disappeared. Finally got a hold of him the following Monday - turns out he and some of his friends took an impromptu trip to his parents house. Did some grilling and swimming in his pool. Drinking with the fam out on the deck. Perfect Summer weekend. He's got his gay life when he wants it, and his straight life when he wants that.

Meanwhile, my dumb ass is sittin at home like a dirty-fucking-secret.

That was last straw. I told him flat out that, as much as I cared about him, one thing I was learning in the relationship was that I didn't have the heart to be with someone closeted. I told him that it wasn't his fault, but if he couldn't start being more open about being with me, then we couldn't be. And he couldn't. So I left him.

And it hurt. We were together for over a year. My first long-termer.

But then I started meeting and dating guys who were out. And, as much as I cared about my ex (still do), let me tell you that when start dating someone who loves you and values you, and wants the whole world to know...it's like black, you can't go back. I couldn't imagine going back to being the human equivalent of the cum rag you keep stashed under the bed.

But back to you.

Do what you feel you need to do. You have the right to be in the type of relationship that you want to be in, just as he does. You're not an asshole for wanting your SO to acknowledge your presence in his life. And you won't get anything by sitting in a corner and suffering in silence, like some Victorian-era housewife.


EDIT: That was a lot longer than I intended it to be. But this topic always strikes a chord with me...
 
*slow clap*

Well said, Royal. I'm gonna have to agree. You might not need an ultimatum like "I'm gonna break up with you", maybe it's time for him to grow up a little.

Honestly, I feel the same way about my BF. It seems like he's out to everyone (close friends/family at least, and it's listed on his FB), but I still feel like there's some separation. He's known my 3/4 closest friends almost as long as I've known them (although I introduced him to them), and I know roughly...1 of his friends, who I've hung out with for all of 10 minutes total throughout the years we've been together. I've been kind of 'over it', because it's not a huge deal, but when I sit down here and think about it...that's kinda fucked up, and it pisses me off. A lot of his friends are gamers, too, so it's not like we wouldn't have anything to talk about.

:/ It's like the one aspect of our relationship that just doesn't sit well with me. And I know, I know, I should talk to him about it, but it just seems so trivial. I don't *need* to hang out with his friends, and honestly it wouldn't be convenient since they all live on the opposite side of the city, but it'd sure be nice to be introduced to them and to hang out and have fun with them.
 
ciD_Vain said:
oh my god. cutest thing happened to me today... throughout the whole day, i've been having a text message conversation with disneyland guy. i've never actually met him yet in person as we've met on Grindr and since then we've exchanged numbers and have just been talking through text messages. while i was at work, he texts me saying how he wants to see me but he currently has no car. i asked him if he wanted me to pick him up, but he said he wouldn't want me to drive really late at night just to hang out for a little bit, and then drop him back home, so i said ok maybe next time. an hour and a half before i got off of work he texts me "surprise!" then "i don't see you" and i reply "huh? don't mess with me, you're not here. i don't see you!" he replies, "oh...i think i'm at the wrong one..." he tried surprising me with a visit at work but ended up at the wrong Starbucks...LOL. funny thing is, he ended up at the one my brother works at. I told him that the one i work at is literally all the way down the other side, 2 cities over. he says that he's sorry he failed, but i replied saying at least you tried. he tells me he's going to the gym since that was his original plan, and i let him be so he can work out without me bugging him.

20 minutes later, he sends me a text saying "i see you :)" i look outside the window and he's sitting outside smiling back at me. my face flushed red and my coworker starts wondering what's wrong with me. Haha. i tell him that i'm off in an hour, and he says that he'll wait for me. that last hour had my heart pounding. he's even hotter in real life, his smile is even cuter up close, and his personality is not nearly as "bad boy" as i pictured. i was so nervous to actually spend time with him in person that i kept dropping things at work and tripping over stuff. after i got off, i go outside and i see him sitting in a truck. he tells me that his sister let him borrow her truck which is how he got to see me. he tells me that i'm so cute that i make him nervous and intimidated. i couldn't help myself because at one point we caught each other just staring and smiling, admiring each other's company. it was a really cute first meeting and it went a lot better than i had imagined.

he asks me out on a dinner date but i tell him i don't want to go with my work clothes on. he says he doesn't care and thinks i look cute in it. lol. we eventually decide for some fast food at Sonics; he buys me my food and we sit down and have our first personal talk. we talk about our families, where we came from, and our previous relationships. he got really sad when he started talking about his recent car accident that caused him to start taking physical therapy classes, so i hugged him and he embraced me so warmly- we didn't let go for a good while, we just kept hugging and it felt so good. eventually, our little date ended. before he went to the truck, he motioned for a hand shake and said "it's nice to finally meet you", he smiled and then walked off.

nothing like this has ever happened to me and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. i really can't wait for disneyland now :)
kWXQX.gif


This is the cutest story I've ever read on GAF. I now feel all warm and fuzzy too.
 
Sai-kun said:
*slow clap*

Well said, Royal. I'm gonna have to agree. You might not need an ultimatum like "I'm gonna break up with you", maybe it's time for him to grow up a little.

Honestly, I feel the same way about my BF. It seems like he's out to everyone (close friends/family at least, and it's listed on his FB), but I still feel like there's some separation. He's known my 3/4 closest friends almost as long as I've known them (although I introduced him to them), and I know roughly...1 of his friends, who I've hung out with for all of 10 minutes total throughout the years we've been together. I've been kind of 'over it', because it's not a huge deal, but when I sit down here and think about it...that's kinda fucked up, and it pisses me off. A lot of his friends are gamers, too, so it's not like we wouldn't have anything to talk about.

:/ It's like the one aspect of our relationship that just doesn't sit well with me. And I know, I know, I should talk to him about it, but it just seems so trivial. I don't *need* to hang out with his friends, and honestly it wouldn't be convenient since they all live on the opposite side of the city, but it'd sure be nice to be introduced to them and to hang out and have fun with them.

It bothers you. That alone is reason enough for it to be a big deal. And it seems like you're trying to talk yourself out of it being a big deal.

It would be a big deal to me, honestly. I'm not advocating that couples do everything together (I hate that shit). But, with that said, you guys have been together for years and you've only met ONE of his friends once?

Yeah, that'd piss me off. Either he's ashamed of you for some reason (in which case, he's a loser), he's ashamed of his friends (in which case, he thinks too much), or he doesn't realize that you want to be included sometimes. You should talk to him.
 
Finally met and hung out with a dude I've been chatting with for *two* years off and on. Cute guy in person. He's actually a lot like me, which I always thought would be a huge turn-on, but hilariously isn't. Kid got a little ripped, had crappy opinions about a bunch of things, spouted off on conspiracy theories and between the cigarette smoke (I thought he'd quit, but he hadn't) and my newfound allergy to cats, being with him and at his place was a mild ordeal to my senses. He's been quite a bit of a flake in previous attempts to meet up, too.

Despite aaaallll this...I can't help but feel like there's some kind of spark there. I was really, really hoping our first hangout, after all this time, would have gone much better.

Oh well.
 
royalan said:
It bothers you. That alone is reason enough for it to be a big deal. And it seems like you're trying to talk yourself out of it being a big deal.

It would be a big deal to me, honestly. I'm not advocating that couples do everything together (I hate that shit). But, with that said, you guys have been together for years and you've only met ONE of his friends once?

Yeah, that'd piss me off. Either he's ashamed of you for some reason (in which case, he's a loser), he's ashamed of his friends (in which case, he thinks too much), or he doesn't realize that you want to be included sometimes. You should talk to him.

Couples doing everything doesn't bother me, because I like hanging out with him so much, but obviously everybody needs their space and some 'alone' time, and I do as well, so I don't mind that we only hang out once a week or so.

Another reason I wouldn't really want to bring it up is because although I'd love to hang out with his friends and him, I don't want him to feel like he HAS to invite me to everything, because he doesn't, and I would tell him that, but I think that he would feel pressure from me to do that (even though I wouldn't be pressuring him at all).

Fuck, I dunno. Neither of us are always completely honest with our emotions, I don't think. i've gotten a lot better at opening up to him and telling him if I'm feeling down or frustrated with something else, but if something he does bothers me, I just try to brush it off.

:/
 
My BF is out to his family, which is cool. I met his sister and his sister is bi herself. She hasn't told her father yet though. However, I really don't want to tell my family. It'll probably come to pass that they find out later on. and I will tell them, but right now I'm trying to figure out life myself.

But it's hilarious when I'm with straight friends or friends I don't know so well. I'm all Brah and act like

no-americano-jersey-shore1.gif


But let me get around my bros/sisters and the RATCHET snowman comes out. I'm a hood loud project chick on the inside like

2natqvk.gif


They say i'm the ratchet one of the group. I don't feed.
 
Ugh, this just makes me want to rage.

Every Friday 20-year-old Salt Lake City resident Dane Hall attended the gay Friday night party at Club Sound. When he left, four men approached him and began yelling “faggot” before they punched him in the back of the head, grabbed his shirt and began punching Hall repeatedly in the face. When Hall fell to the ground, one of his attackers put his open mouth on the curb and curb stomped him, knocking out six of his teeth, shattering his cheekbone, breaking his jaw in three places, and jamming a piece of his jawbone in his brain. Two other attackers repeatedly kicked Hall in the stomach before stealing his ID and $40 and running away.
http://www.queerty.com/adorable-20-...um=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+queerty2+(Queerty)

Ugh...


Sai-kun said:
Couples doing everything doesn't bother me, because I like hanging out with him so much, but obviously everybody needs their space and some 'alone' time, and I do as well, so I don't mind that we only hang out once a week or so.

Another reason I wouldn't really want to bring it up is because although I'd love to hang out with his friends and him, I don't want him to feel like he HAS to invite me to everything, because he doesn't, and I would tell him that, but I think that he would feel pressure from me to do that (even though I wouldn't be pressuring him at all).

Fuck, I dunno. Neither of us are always completely honest with our emotions, I don't think. i've gotten a lot better at opening up to him and telling him if I'm feeling down or frustrated with something else, but if something he does bothers me, I just try to brush it off.

:/

I think you should open up to him more, before these things become not-so-easy to ignore. I mean, you don't have to put pressure on him and make him feel like he has to invite you, but...again, meeting one friend one time after years of being together is a little...odd.
 
royalan said:
Ugh, this just makes me want to rage.


http://www.queerty.com/adorable-20-...um=feed&utm_campaign=Feed:+queerty2+(Queerty)

Ugh...




I think you should open up to him more, before these things become not-so-easy to ignore. I mean, you don't have to put pressure on him and make him feel like he has to invite you, but...again, meeting one friend one time after years of being together is a little...odd.
How do you think I should broach the subject? Is it okay to bring it up over text message or should I just wait until the next time we hang out?
 
I feel dirty after reading that "lisp" thread.

Anyways, congrats Cid on the hot date. Take it slow. He sounds pretty sweet, but be smart too.
 
SpaceBridge said:
I feel dirty after reading that "lisp" thread.

Anyways, congrats Cid on the hot date. Take it slow. He sounds pretty sweet, but be smart too.

Ugh, there is so much self-hate in that thread! How can we ever be expected to be taken seriously as a community when we don't take ourselves seriously? Why can't the gay community be as rich and diverse as any other?

I hate this trend of thought that we should be shunning aspects of gay culture to be accepted.

"Ew. I don't have a lisp and none of my friends do. We're not a part of the the scene like those gays..."
 
SecretMoblin said:
This lisp thread is making me feel a wide range of emotions. I stopped reading.

Yeah me too. I'd like to add my two cents...but then I think, why bother.

I dont know what they mean by lisp anyways. Noone I know has a lisp, cuz a lisp is a caricature of a gay man. Now, if were talking "effeminate" traits, like tone of voice or enunciation of words, or flourishes of gestures, then Id say they exist, but arent really forced.
 
SecretMoblin said:
This lisp thread is making me feel a wide range of emotions. I stopped reading.
Mine mainly range from revulsion (at the self-loathers) to rage (at the oblivious bigots who don't even realize how bigoted they actually are).

OHjob.gif


Best to just stay away completely.
 
Granger Danger said:
Well, my good mood after reading Cid's lovely story has been thoroughly destroyed again by that god-awful lisp thread. Never change, GAF.
:) don't be in a bad mood, i'm glad my story made you happy.
SpaceBridge said:
I feel dirty after reading that "lisp" thread.

Anyways, congrats Cid on the hot date. Take it slow. He sounds pretty sweet, but be smart too.
He is really sweet, and i will be taking it slow :) i don't want to mess this up.
 
ciD_Vain said:
oh my god. cutest thing happened to me today... throughout the whole day, i've been having a text message conversation with disneyland guy. i've never actually met him yet in person as we've met on Grindr and since then we've exchanged numbers and have just been talking through text messages. while i was at work, he texts me saying how he wants to see me but he currently has no car. i asked him if he wanted me to pick him up, but he said he wouldn't want me to drive really late at night just to hang out for a little bit, and then drop him back home, so i said ok maybe next time. an hour and a half before i got off of work he texts me "surprise!" then "i don't see you" and i reply "huh? don't mess with me, you're not here. i don't see you!" he replies, "oh...i think i'm at the wrong one..." he tried surprising me with a visit at work but ended up at the wrong Starbucks...LOL. funny thing is, he ended up at the one my brother works at. I told him that the one i work at is literally all the way down the other side, 2 cities over. he says that he's sorry he failed, but i replied saying at least you tried. he tells me he's going to the gym since that was his original plan, and i let him be so he can work out without me bugging him.

20 minutes later, he sends me a text saying "i see you :)" i look outside the window and he's sitting outside smiling back at me. my face flushed red and my coworker starts wondering what's wrong with me. Haha. i tell him that i'm off in an hour, and he says that he'll wait for me. that last hour had my heart pounding. he's even hotter in real life, his smile is even cuter up close, and his personality is not nearly as "bad boy" as i pictured. i was so nervous to actually spend time with him in person that i kept dropping things at work and tripping over stuff. after i got off, i go outside and i see him sitting in a truck. he tells me that his sister let him borrow her truck which is how he got to see me. he tells me that i'm so cute that i make him nervous and intimidated. i couldn't help myself because at one point we caught each other just staring and smiling, admiring each other's company. it was a really cute first meeting and it went a lot better than i had imagined.

he asks me out on a dinner date but i tell him i don't want to go with my work clothes on. he says he doesn't care and thinks i look cute in it. lol. we eventually decide for some fast food at Sonics; he buys me my food and we sit down and have our first personal talk. we talk about our families, where we came from, and our previous relationships. he got really sad when he started talking about his recent car accident that caused him to start taking physical therapy classes, so i hugged him and he embraced me so warmly- we didn't let go for a good while, we just kept hugging and it felt so good. eventually, our little date ended. before he went to the truck, he motioned for a hand shake and said "it's nice to finally meet you", he smiled and then walked off.

nothing like this has ever happened to me and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. i really can't wait for disneyland now :)

This post made me smile, congrats

The Abominable Snowman said:
But let me get around my bros/sisters and the RATCHET snowman comes out. I'm a hood loud project chick on the inside like

http://i56.tinypic.com/2natqvk.gif

They say i'm the ratchet one of the group. I don't feed.

This post made me feel all slutty, preach it gurl.
 
royalan said:
Ugh, there is so much self-hate in that thread! How can we ever be expected to be taken seriously as a community when we don't take ourselves seriously? Why can't the gay community be as rich and diverse as any other?

We're demonstrating a ton of the over-sensitivity in the community in this very thread. That's half the reason I can't take my own community of gay people seriously, where I'm supposed to feel totally at home and welcome.

I'll hide behind a forcefield now for the inevitable hate thrown my way, haha.
 
Magnus, it's just that some of your comments sound like you're dishing out on effeminate people just so that straight people will find you more acceptable.

That you aren't in effeminate gays, that's fine. But they don't give gay people a bad name. If people can't get over their bigotry, that's no one's fault but the bigots.
 
Alcoori said:
Magnus, it's just that some of your comments sound like you're dishing out on effeminate people just so that straight people will find you more acceptable.

That you aren't in effeminate gays, that's fine. But they don't give gay people a bad name. If people can't get over their bigotry, that's no one's fault but the bigots.

I often find the effeminate qualities are married to several other undesirable stereotypes in the gay community, so I apologize; I have trouble separating them in my head. Of course there's nothing wrong with a way of speaking or behaving. I just automatically leap ahead to all the other negative qualities that usually accompany those people and yeah, many of those do give the gay community a bad name.

I wouldn't let myself jump to conclusions and believe in stereotypes unless I didn't see them reinforced practically every time I interact with other gay guys. It's challenging.
 
A fanboy threatened me to stab me for saying Kojima (Metal Gear Solid series) writing is a big ball of nonsense. He was dead serious and I couldn't help but laugh at his face thing which made him madder. I simply laughed and said you mad? Then in the moment of Awkward silence a friend of mine came with the ringtone while I was laughing at the awkward silence on the table. I thought it was hilarious how serious some people can be at something to the point of even killing for someone they don't even knows. I know he admires the Kojima but people won't always agree with what he thinks and he usually talks crap about everyone else's taste so I think it was kinda hilarious the way he took it. It was pretty much 4 saying he made no sense and him getting madder by the minute.

Then I started making Jokes of how Kingdom Hearts series took a Metal Gear Story Dive after the first one just for trolling and after saying Shamalayan and Kojima should work on a movie together to see what the masterminds of nonsense would come up with the direction of Uwe Boll was the last straw which brought him to the point of threatening me of stabbing me in the face if I continued joking or talking bad about Kojima. (I like metal gear and I have made that clear but still lol)

Well I guess that's it for today I shouldn't have wrote so much. Anyhow people rarely pay attention to my posts.

:/
 
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