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[HoodWinked]

take a mulligan and do better on the next one.

 

[eddie4]

 

[SometimeLaterToday]

I don't have anything to add, seeing as there's been a comprehensive range of responses, anywhere from effective methods of improvement backed by actual research to reasonably helpful to 'slowly-backing-away-from-them-if-you-see-them-in-public', except to mention one thing.

It's important how long it's been like this; whether it's a recent development or an ongoing issue. Because if it's the latter, applying whatever needs applied and expecting immediate results and being disappointed and/or angry with that will only broaden the rift that's already there. Patience is a virtue, as they say.

 

[M3Freak]

Take his bedroom door off the hinges.

Take his bed apart and leave mattress on floor.
Take the CPU in his PC out.

Wait for confirmation behaviour has improved, permanently. Put the CPU back.

wait for further improvements before putting back test.

 

[Liljagare]

How did you deal with yourself?

 

[Tesseract]

Take his bedroom door off the hinges.

Take his bed apart and leave mattress on floor.
Take the CPU in his PC out.

Wait for confirmation behaviour has improved, permanently. Put the CPU back.

wait for further improvements before putting back test.

 

[The Incarnation]

Approach him from behind and slap the 'Million Dollar Dream' on his ass. Keep screaming, "Ring the bell, Ring the bell" while you're at it.

 

[-YFC-]

His ass + your foot = discipline.

 

[Durask]

the problem is my wife absolutely hates his game playing and has even threatened to leave me if I don't manage to bring him under control.

She will leave you so that she can enjoy managing him on her own?

 

[mcjmetroid]

I'm no parent but it seems to be like the new 'grounded' is to take away their electronic devices for an evening or two.

 

[rykomatsu]

Make him go break off a switch.

 

[p_xavier]

I already don't respect the OT. Just let him be. I left home at 15 to live on my own and to continue school elswhere. With all the BS rules my parents were making, it was the best decision I made. Stop controlling your kids folks .

 

[Dunedain_Ranger]

I take away their era account.... electronics and a firm talk first if escalated I just take use the stuff they love and take it away my son loves his football and basketball so I take his court away or have him run extra after practice. My daughter her painting and arts stuff. Thankfully I have some very good kids.

 

[Slings and Arrows]

Tan his arse black and blue with a belt.

He has to learn about the line at some point. Better it coming from you than some punk on the street

 

[SurprisedPikachu]

I would highly recommend reading Discipline That Lasts a Lifetime. You basically have to be consistent and stand your ground. You are their parent, not their friend, but that doesn’t mean you have to be an asshole either. Follow through is important - if you do X then Y **will** happen. Period. Don’t ever yell “if you do this then I will take your phone away.” Just take the phone away. You’re the boss. Boss them.

 

[Punished Miku]

I remember at that age I lied a lot. I think you learn guilt, and it's not something you automatically feel immediately. When you get caught in a really massive lie for the first or second time, and it really sits on you like a stench you can't escape - then you learn to not lie. At least that's how it was for me. Grew out of it around 16 probably. Not everyone does though.

 

[MiyazakiHatesKojima]

In fact, nothing you pick your battles and this one isn't it.




Do you remember being a teenager? Puberty, homones wild mood swings? This will pass and he'll come out the other side just fine. If he's moody, throws a strop or whatever, just let it go. What you don't do is to try and control further as it will just push him away more.



He's becoming a young adult and that should have more freedoms and responsibilities along with it. Some arbitrary number you've pulled from your ass about how long he's allowed to use his devices is overly controlling and is just driving you crazy trying to enforce a rule you've just made up, just because "That's what parents are supposed to do".
Are you on Covid lockdown? What's he supposed to do when he's not on his phone PC? Come and watch TV with his parents, the screen they can watch as much as they like and that's OK?

You do know everything is on his phone? His social life, his music, his videos and porn? Imagine your parents coming in and taking your phone away.



You're being overly controlling and in so doing you're teaching him these behaviors. My dad was the same, and I learned just to agree with him so he's shut up and leave me alone quicker. Again, it comes back to what is he supposed to to when he's not on his phone or PC? Stare at a wall?

If he's done all his schoolwork, chores and not getting in trouble then he should be able to spend his free time as he wants. If those things are being neglected because of gaming only then do you have a problem.


You don't get this reaction unless you've been really hounding the kid over this.




It will pass and he'll be just as good a kid as he's always been, sorry you're not getting your power trip of controlling him any more but he's becoming a young adult. Again, your enforcing an arbitrary number of hours just "Becuse".



How is it for his "Own good"? You've not made a good reasonable case for that at all.



Finally! This is what you should be focusing on, becuse there's a whole world of troubles he could be in and as he gets older you could still have to potentially deal with that would make you wish he was just sitting at home on his PC playing games.



Nope, you're butthurt you "Authority" has been undermined. Quite being so damn controlling and remember your sons going through puberty, soon enough he'll be out getting drunk and fucking girls (or guys, if that's his thing).

nush I COULD NOT AGREE EVEN MORE!

OP, listen and read this post very carefully because it's the truth. Let your son spend his free time.playing games, would you.rather have him.experiment with drugs or liquor instead?

 

[M1chl]

As a former addict, only thing that works is take away your shit. But I experienced it, while adult. Don't do stupid shit like get physical, because at this age it only can blow up in your face....