How to approach this girl that I like?

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1. Wrap yourself entirely in black trashbags
2. Cut a hole for your penor
3. Make your approach
4. Enjoy your honeymoon
 
JokerOfSpades said:
You deal with rejection by not investing too much into the person you're going after. You're not dating, after all.
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It's really hard to not care when you do... meaning, I started only approaching people I got to know and care about. Over the years, I tend to take rejection harder now even though I don't care about the people now as much as I did in the past. Still, I care. Can't get over being interesting in someone and not caring at the same time. Feels like rubbing my belly and patting my head. The irony is I've never been able to pat my head in grade school but about two decades later; I tried again and am able to do it without thought. I guess we do grow but I don't think I have the time to wait till I get used to rejection by osmosis. I know there is no magic bullet and I just have to keep manning up but it still never feels good. I keep praying I don't end up with people who make hurting others their forte.
 
yn-neko hates a cat said:
It's really hard to not care when you do... meaning, I started only approaching people I got to know and care about. Over the years, I tend to take rejection harder now even though I don't care about the people now as much as I did in the past. Still, I care. Can't get over being interesting in someone and not caring at the same time. Feels like rubbing my belly and patting my head. The irony is I've never been able to pat my head in grade school but about two decades later; I tried again and am able to do it without thought. I guess we do grow but I don't think I have the time to wait till I get used to rejection by osmosis. I know there is no magic bullet and I just have to keep manning up but it still never feels good. I keep praying I don't end up with people who make hurting others their forte.
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I'm sorry, but what on earth are you talking about?
 
Globox_82 said:
It's very awkward situation. We work at the same place, but she is night shit I am day shift. So when I arrive early in the morning she has one hour left before she gets to go home. Now that would be enough if we worked at the same section, but we don't. So basically I pass her every morning on my way to my section or I see her going on a break with her co workers.
I know she is a summer worker because she worked here even last summer, actually we had same "introduction day" and even then she caught my interest. Of course this is only based on psychical attraction. I think she gives me a look (you know that a few seconds longer look then it should be type of a look) like maybe she also finds me interesting( I would like to think that) when we sometimes cross roads but really we never spoke to each other so it might mean nothing.
So basically I don't have time to get close to her, and when I see her on break she is with other woman most of the time.
I am afraid that she doesn't have much left on her contract when it comes to this summer, and she might not come back next summer, you never know.

So what should I do? Approach her like some freak while she works and ask if she is single and for her phone number? She might find it creepy, all of a sudden like some stalker.

That's the problem I have no one to ask about her. If she is single or not. She might be married for all I know. It might end up being really bad if I did something rash like that. Worst of all she works with other woman and I still have to get back there and work in the future. I don't want to get rep as some weirdo.
It's so annoying. What should I do?
O and btw if it isn't clear I suck at this.
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Next time you see her and you have eye contact do the following:

-Once you've made eye contact, hold it (no, do not look down) and smile and then walk over. (Whilst walking over, step calmy but confidently, aka don't shuffle and look down like a weirdo. Ok, it's not weird but that's how she'll interpret it).
-Once in front of her, say hello and then say (post #7 and/or a variation of)
-Once she starts talking/accepting, stop her and say that you would love to keep chatting but you have to get back to work. Keep dat interest/intrigue/attraction.

Always maintain eye contact and don't dart your eyes or head around either.

Do it around her other female friends for she and her friends will appreciate the balls you had to confidently walk over and ask her out for coffee. (Be sure to acknowledge her friends/colleagues).
 
yn-neko hates a cat said:
It's really hard to not care when you do... meaning, I started only approaching people I got to know and care about. Over the years, I tend to take rejection harder now even though I don't care about the people now as much as I did in the past. Still, I care. Can't get over being interesting in someone and not caring at the same time. Feels like rubbing my belly and patting my head. The irony is I've never been able to pat my head in grade school but about two decades later; I tried again and am able to do it without thought. I guess we do grow but I don't think I have the time to wait till I get used to rejection by osmosis. I know there is no magic bullet and I just have to keep manning up but it still never feels good. I keep praying I don't end up with people who make hurting others their forte.
Click to expand...

You can be interested without falling in love. But if you're the type who ends up liking few girls and on more than their looks, then I understand that. I know that feeling, but you have to remember that there are plenty of women out there. Every rejection serves to keep you from wasting your time, and theirs. Just because we like someone doesn't mean that we're meant to be with them or that we can't find someone better suited to us.
 
xxracerxx said:
This isn't a staring contest, he can look away for moments at a time. No need to go all Terminator on the poor girl.
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Green Scar said:
"COME WITH ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE AND/OR HAVE A ROMANTIC NIGHT OUT SOME TIME"
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And if she rejects you, stare her down and say "I'll be back." Do a robocop turn (body first then head) and beatbox the Terminator theme song.

[edit:] Don't over-think this. You need to approach this with the ability to laugh at yourself.
 
My advice, for what it's worth, would be to remember that women are just people not some strange alien species.

I wouldn't recommend taking any advice that sounds like it came straight from The Game, i.e. the post by Jet Jaguar above. I wouldn't worry about any kind of psuedo-psychology bollocks or looking like some alpha male.

If I were you I would go over to her next time you see her and say hi. Take it from there and strike up a conversation as you would with anyone else you work with. It doesn't have to be anything particularly insightful.

Try not to get intimidated. I know that's easier said than done but she's only human. It also might be that you strike up a conversation with her and come to the conclusion that she's a complete idiot.

I probably wouldn't ask her out the first time you speak with her.
 
@Sneds

Whilst I would agree with you, your post is effectively "be yourself" and whilst that would be cool, often it doesn't go so well, and if he's been thinking about her (which going by his op, he has), then any nerves etc will likely come through and she will notice it (especially if she has been approached by other guys before and if she's attractive then she certainly will have). Imo of course
 
Jet Jaguar said:
@Sneds

Whilst I would agree with you, your post is effectively "be yourself" and whilst that would be cool, often it doesn't go so well, and if he's been thinking about her (which going by his op, he has), then any nerves etc will likely come through and she will notice it (especially if she has been approached by other guys before and if she's attractive then she certainly will have). Imo of course
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I take your point.

It partly depends what the OP is looking for. If he is looking for some kind of genuinely meaningful relationship then at some point he's going to have to be himself around this woman and women in general.

If the woman in the OP is only attracted to confident men, and the OP isn't a confident person then that's going to become obvious and be a problem once they get to know each other. Basically, if you have to pretend to be someone you're not to attract the woman you want, then I would imagine that you're not compatible to begin with.

If all he wants is a short-term fling then I guess he might be able to pull off the faux confidence.
 
Javaman said:
That's pretty much what I did to hook up with my wife. She was working at a pizza hut and some buddies of mine and I took a break from LANning and went there to eat. I actually had met her before at work in passing while she was a temp but never really saw each other much, just in passing. I had forgotten about her until then but thought she was cute so I told her i'd like to get to get to know her better. I said, let's grab some coffee some time and gave her my number and told her call me some time. For me it's a whole lot easier to give my number than ask for hers. It probably puts her a bit at ease too. She called me later that night and we talked on the phone for hours and hit it off, meeting later at Denny's for more face to face time.

Long story short, tell her you'd like to get to know her better and give her your number and see what she says. Easypeasy

Edit: the first time you talk for more than
smalltalk tell her its nice to meat her.
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LOL
 
Lumination said:
I have a longterm girlfriend, so I hopefully never have to go through the motions again, but I've always been curious about this. How do you go about giving her your number without seeming awkward? Do you pre-write it? Do you conveniently have a strip of paper on hand to write it down? Do you say it to her while she types it in her phone? Not directed at you, but you reminded me that I've always been curious about this. Always asked for numbers, never gave them.
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Just make sure you've got a scrap of paper and a pen and start writing it down while saying "here's my number, give me a call some time" etc etc. I hadn't thought much about the phone entry thing. Just make sure the recipt doesn't have anything embaressiing on it.

"My little pony panties" $15.99
Or
How to pick up women - due back to library on ####
 
Just go up to her and talk to her, ask her out for some drinks... don't act like it is a big deal if she says no or whatever.
 
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