Baron Aloha
A Shining Example
What's the opposite of Christopher Reeves?
Christopher Walken
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I know this is a rather tasteless joke...but I couldn't stop laughing...
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Dagless M.D.
Member
How many dead babies does it take to paint a house
depends how hard you throw them
This looks retarded when written out, but I still like it.
A little boy is being taken into the woods by a child molester. As they enter the darkness the kid says "Mister, I'm scared. It's dark in here".
The child molester says "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone".
A little boy is being taken into the woods by a child molester. As they enter the darkness the kid says "Mister, I'm scared. It's dark in here".
The child molester says "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone".
B-B-Bomba!
Member
Man finds a little girl crying on the edge of a cliff, and asks her why she's so upset.
Girl explains both her parents just jumped off the edge.
Man begins unbuckling his belt, and the little girl asks him what he's doing.
Guess it's not your lucky day, replies the man.
Leon, what does poteau translate to!
Girl explains both her parents just jumped off the edge.
Man begins unbuckling his belt, and the little girl asks him what he's doing.
Guess it's not your lucky day, replies the man.
Leon, what does poteau translate to!
BobbyRobby
Member
Why did the chicken cross the road?
I heard this on an mp3 of some comedian. I think his name was Niel Hamburger. Hilarious guy. you can hear people in the background cursing him off.
to see Princess Diana lying dead in a car wreck.
I heard this on an mp3 of some comedian. I think his name was Niel Hamburger. Hilarious guy. you can hear people in the background cursing him off.
Traumahound
Member
I was sharing these with a co-worker and he told me one I hadn't heard before:
Why do pedophiles molest young boys?
Why do pedophiles molest young boys?
Their little hands make the pedophiles' dicks look bigger.
D
Deleted member 1235
Unconfirmed Member
How do you make spaghetti?
smash a leper with a tennis racquet
Stuggernaut
Grandma's Chippy
How do you make a dead baby float?
A little girl walks into the kitchen and says to her mom " Mommy, where do babies come from". The mom was busy getting ready for work so told her "Go ask your father"
The little girl found her father in the living room and asked him the same question to which he replied, "Wait till mommy leaves"
What did the canibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Take your foot off its head
A little girl walks into the kitchen and says to her mom " Mommy, where do babies come from". The mom was busy getting ready for work so told her "Go ask your father"
The little girl found her father in the living room and asked him the same question to which he replied, "Wait till mommy leaves"
What did the canibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass
Lemurnator
Banned
WARNING:
!!!EXTREMELY OFFENSIVE!!!
What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheelchair?
I'm going to hell.
!!!EXTREMELY OFFENSIVE!!!
What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheelchair?
Rollaids
I'm going to hell.
What do you do when someone gets an epileptic seizure in his bath ?
Throw in your laundry.
Litle Joey to his mother: Mommy mommy ! Daddy has hung himself in the attic !!
Mom storms in a frenzy to the attic to find nothing there...
Little Joey: haha ! April Fool's ! He's hanging in the basement.
Throw in your laundry.
Litle Joey to his mother: Mommy mommy ! Daddy has hung himself in the attic !!
Mom storms in a frenzy to the attic to find nothing there...
Little Joey: haha ! April Fool's ! He's hanging in the basement.
Camillemurs said:
:lol :lol :lol
wow, quite a few of these I haven't heard before
How did Hellen Keller burn the right side of her face?
She answered the iron.
How did Hellen Keller burn the left side of her face?
They called back.
Whats the difference between Princess Di and Tiger Woods.
Tiger Woods has a better driver
What's better than winning a silver medal at the special olympics?
Not being retarded.
Traumahound
Member
Vitten said:
You just reminded me of one of my favorite jokes:
What's blue and doesn't fit anymore?
A dead epileptic.
Manabanana
Member
Mr Pockets said:
I do believe the joke is
one can of root beer and two scoops dead baby.
mightynine
Member
B-B-Bomba! said:
This one made me laugh. Then I felt bad.
What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of him?
You only need one nail to hang the picture.
What tastes good on pie but not on pussy?
Crust.
What's green and has 12 tits?
A garbage bag at a breast cancer clinic.
Why do women have two sets of lips?
So they can piss and moan at the same time.
What did Michale Jackson say to the little kid while they lay together in bed?
There's a great musician inside of you.
You only need one nail to hang the picture.
What tastes good on pie but not on pussy?
Crust.
What's green and has 12 tits?
A garbage bag at a breast cancer clinic.
Why do women have two sets of lips?
So they can piss and moan at the same time.
What did Michale Jackson say to the little kid while they lay together in bed?
There's a great musician inside of you.
WHOAguitarninja
Member
My physics teacher last year asked our class (of about 9 guys) this question. Before he said the answer, the first thing I blurted out was...
having legs
I think I like my answer more.
What's 18 inches long, stiff and makes women scream all night?
Why do women get vaginal yeast infection?
What do you get when you cross Abe Lincoln, Ernest Hemmingway, JFK, and Kurt Cobain?
Why Didn't JFK Jr. have a shower before he left for his plane
what did ray charles think of the cheese grater he got for his birthday?
Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.
Why do women get vaginal yeast infection?
So they know how it is to live with an irritating cunt once in a while
What do you get when you cross Abe Lincoln, Ernest Hemmingway, JFK, and Kurt Cobain?
A complete skull
Why Didn't JFK Jr. have a shower before he left for his plane
He figured he'd wash up on shore
what did ray charles think of the cheese grater he got for his birthday?
it was the most violent book he's ever read
worldrunover
Member
OK MORE DEAD BABY JOKES BUT IM NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT.
What's the difference betwen a pile of dead babies and a Volkswagon?
How do you make a dead baby float?
Enough of that...
Why does a woman wear white on her wedding?
How do you know when it's time to leave Neverland ranch?
What's the difference betwen a pile of dead babies and a Volkswagon?
I don't have a Volkswagon in my garage!
How do you make a dead baby float?
Add two scoops of ice cream.
Enough of that...
Why does a woman wear white on her wedding?
The dishwasher has to match the fridge and the oven.
How do you know when it's time to leave Neverland ranch?
When the big hand's on the little hand.
WHOAguitarninja
Member
ohamsie said:
:lol
Mama Smurf
My penis is still intact.
I prefer the joke when it's:
What do you tell a woman who has two black eyes?
It's a small difference I admit.
Lots of funny in this thread. You guys have said all the ones I can think of though.
What do you tell a woman who has two black eyes?
Nothing you haven't told her twice already
It's a small difference I admit.
Lots of funny in this thread. You guys have said all the ones I can think of though.
MrPing1000
Member
JC10001 said:
:lol damn :lol
worldrunover
Member
Why couldn't Helen Keller drive?
Because she was a woman.
SlickWilly223
Time ta STEP IT UP
I love you guys.
:lol :lol :lol Nothing like completely tasteless jokes...
What's the fastest thing in the world?
What's the second fastest thing in the world?
What do you get when 10 black people are crammed into a car?
What do you call two black cops on motorcycles?
What do you call 50,000 black people falling in the sky?
How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart?
Why is having a good shit better than sex?
Women are like guns, keep one around long enough and you're going to want to shoot it.
How are women like babies?
What do you get if you stuff your hand up a Gypsy's cunt when she's on the rag ?
How many men does it take to open a beer?
What does a prostitute have at the end of her shift?
What do you do after you just raped a 12yr old deaf & dumb girl?
How do you give a woman freedom of speech?
What's the difference between a pussy & a cunt?
What's the fastest thing in the world?
A black man.
What's the second fastest thing in the world?
A cop chasing him.
What do you get when 10 black people are crammed into a car?
Tinted windows.
What do you call two black cops on motorcycles?
Chocolate Chips.
What do you call 50,000 black people falling in the sky?
Night.
How do you know when a woman's about to say something smart?
When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me..."
Why is having a good shit better than sex?
Because you don't have to kiss it afterwards.
Women are like guns, keep one around long enough and you're going to want to shoot it.
How are women like babies?
When they both start to cry they're usually full of shit.
What do you get if you stuff your hand up a Gypsy's cunt when she's on the rag ?
Your palm read.
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
What does a prostitute have at the end of her shift?
A box of Assorted Creams.
What do you do after you just raped a 12yr old deaf & dumb girl?
Break her fingers so she can't tell her mum.
How do you give a woman freedom of speech?
Take your dick out of her mouth.
What's the difference between a pussy & a cunt?
A pussy is a sweet, juicy, succulent, warm, fun and useful thing.
…A cunt is the thing that owns it.
…A cunt is the thing that owns it.
God's Hand
Banned
Oh great... the black jokes. Now someone's going to get offended.
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