I don't get why the general reaction is 'yes'. 'Racism' seems to be a catchall these days for anything and everything that touches on the issues of cultural differences, which is unfortunate. Racism is prejudice based on belief that a race or group of people is superior or inferior to another.
If a person chooses not to date people of a specific race/gender/age/class, why does the reason have to be something involving hate or superiority?
The 'I don't see color' thing that seems so attached to the illusion of a post-racial society ignores that some people really are just tribal in the very literal sense of segregation to preserve whatever element of culture they value.
I usually stay silent on issues of race considering that its easy to get banned when an opinion is contrary. However, I don't believe that we as a country will ever truly defeat racism until we actually ACKNOWLEDGE the differences, then learn to RESPECT them.
To that end, If say, a Ghanan man choose to only date black women, why is that person vilified? Why is a White man who only wants to date blonde-haired, blue-eyed, southern belles a racist because he's not interested in a black or cuban woman?
Before, there were insane societal reasons for people disallowed to share their love with whomever. Now, we have choices. If those choices are rooted in honesty, and not hate, then why can't a person choose to exclude or include who they wish even if the reason is that I want a woman who looks like my momma, has my shared values and shared background? As a society, why have we gone to the OTHER extreme in FORCING people to admit to loving EVERYTHING because it's politically correct?
I'll be honest, I'm a black man who exclusively dated black women and married a black woman. Does that make me some antiquated social martyr? Am I wrong because I wasn't as interested in dating everyone else?
The short answer - and what I hope would cause people to do internal reflection - is NO. My wife and the people who I dated had similar reasoning and values that had NOTHING to do with feeling negatively about another group of people.
I mean, it should go without being said that I feel that there are drop dead gorgeous freaking women of EVERY ethnicity. As a guy, of course biologically I'd want them ALL. However, I chose to design preferences to foster whatever it was that I wanted to accomplish - and succeeded.
I think real racism, ie, real backwards and destructive behavior is when people exclude other groups because of those classical issues of superiority or misunderstanding of the unique beauty that we all bring.
But down the line just saying that, hey, you're racist if you don't want everyone in the same way is just....reductive and a little frightening. It once again chooses to ignore or respect the actual differences and cultural choices that one can make. Instead, it pursues this cultural homogeny that is, as we're seeing now, illusory, without first seeing the differences and respecting them as equal.
Sorry for the rant.
