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[disappeared]

op, here's how it is.

Operating a moving vehicle is like a full-time job. Except you aren't being paid to do it. It's a job, though, so you do it fucking properly. You are operating a vehicular machine capable of damaging property and people (and in this case, animals). It is your job to operate the car and avoid these hazards. In this case, you didn't. In fact, you ran over a neighbor's dog. The catch here is that you used your neighbor's property (the driveway) in haste, and you were negligent. Now you want to approach your neighbor - after killing his dog - and initiate a bargaining agreement regarding the damage to your car? You even blame the "stupid dog" for getting in your way.



Do you not see the error in this, at all?

 

[MechaX]

Ignore the armchair attorneys, OP. I once had a client that "accidentally" (ok, he was drunk) parked his car in his neighbor's bedroom. The same bedroom in which his (now ex) wife was having an affair with said neighbor. My client had a heart attack and was awarded a nice chunk of money to cover his medical bills, mental anguish, and the damage to his car. Oh, and his wife had to pay HIM alimony.

Find an attorney in your area that will take the case on a contingency basis. All you pay is court costs unless you win. Seriously, GAF is giving out some pretty irresponsible legal advice up in this joint.

Best advice in the thread, so far. OP, you may be sociopathic, but the law doesn't really care about personality disorders, so go for it. Also, the more expensive the attorney, the more up-to-date research tools they have to get good cases, thus your chances of winning any case increases ten-fold. It may not seem like it, but in this case, there seriously is more bang for your buck.

 

[Aselith]

Here's the right way to deal with this.

Pretty much, as long as you strike first, you'll have the upper hand. However, you are at a disadvantage, because animal cruelty typically outweighs property destruction, the incident occurred while you were on his property, you didn't have permission to be on his property, you hit and run, you admitted you were in a rush, you tricked out a Ford Taurus, you treated the incident leisurely while on a public forum along with an ms paint picture with you destroying the dog in a gory manner while calling the dog ugly, and every other thing.

But none of that matters if you follow my instructions.

Thursday morning head down to your local courthouse and go to the department that handles automobiles and gives out tags and stuff.
Ask for a "Blue Collision Form." They'll know what you want, but if they don't tell them a CRH form, and they'll give you that. Check the bottom corner to make sure the date is still valid.
Next, arrange an appointment later in the day with the judge. If he isn't in, find any department head and claim court negligence. If you're lucky enough to get this then you've pretty much got everything covered.
If the judge is able to meet with you, go fill out the form somewhere, and then go meet with the judge.
Then the window will blast open, and it's THE MUTHA HUMPIN' GOBLIN, BOY!

Run for the hills, cause it's the Green Goblin!

Awwww yeah.

Nobody dicks around with Gobby!

.... What were we talking about?

Spoiler

OP isn't serious. I shouldn't have to be.

I laughed for a very long time at this. Thanks for redeeming this useless thread (along with the sexy blond lady.)

 

[soultron]

lets keep this thread derail going:

Thank you, based weekend_warrior.

 

[Talon]

The Goblin strikes again.

 

[Neuromancer]

The Green Goblin has made this entire exercise meaningful. Thank you Lionel Mandrake.

 

[Commodore_Perry]

 

[Zod the Bear]

Lionel Mandrake for thread president.

 

[PflargBlarg]

This could have been a good thread.

But then it wasn't.