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[Ember128]

1. When you are driving, it is your responsibility to look behind you when you back out, to check and see if you are about to run over anything. If you don't check, and you run over something, it's your own fucking fault for killing smething with a letahl moving object.

2. You ran over his dog on his property. Technically, you would be trespassing. Then you caused property damage. And killed a dog. You're really fucking lucky it wasn't his kid that you ran over and killed.

3. YOU moved YOUR car and hit something that WAS NOT MOVING. If you hit another car when backing out that was parked there, or a toy wagon or barrel of beer or bananas or whatever, that would totally still be your fault.

4. You'll be really lucky if he doesn't sue YOU. He has every ground for that. You have little, if any basis for a lawsuit.

And yes, you're a sociopath. Accepting that you have a problem is the first step towards solving it.

 

[Xeke]

You're a danger to society and I hope your neighbor blows your car up and you're set to jail for being a piece of shit.

 

[Liferebooted]

I hope you rot in hell.

 

[FunkyPajamas]

I wonder if I'm being meta-trolled by users pretending to be trolled by the OP.

 

[suzu]

Bad trolling or plain stupid.. or maybe both!

 

[Jintor]

Just bail out now tbh

 

[Gouty]

Come on gaf, 5 pages for this tired, predictable troll? You're slipping.

 

[soultron]

Seriously, OP? Worst fucking attempt at trolling and tag fishing.

A Ford Taurus is not a "veritable pussy magnet." Your clever ruse unravelled exactly at that point.

 

[Stairs]

Seriously, OP? Worst fucking attempt at trolling and tag fishing.

A Ford Taurus is not a "veritable pussy magnet." Your clever ruse unravelled exactly at that point.

Seriously, I was exaggerating about my car. Even still, it is a great car. I have gotten lots of compliments on it.

 

[Cheshire]

What exactly did it damage on your undercarriage? People scrape curbs and speed bumps and don't do that much damage after one go. I've hit my transmission directly on a square concrete curb and it did nothing.

 

[Neki]

So the OP just wants some attention? Ain't nothing wrong with that, but there's better ways to go about it. You must master your craft.

Sooo hot. oh god.

 

[Celsior]

Run into his house naked, it will solve all you problems 100% of the time.

 

[BakedPigeon]

I wonder if I'm being meta-trolled by users pretending to be trolled by the OP.

:jackncoke

 

[big ander]

Have you tried feeding the dog pizza yet?

 

[alejob]

But did you tell the dog that he could not pee on your mailbox?

 

[Stairs]

Have you tried feeding the dog pizza yet?

It's dead.

 

[drohne]

the op is kind of funny if you disregard the text and read it as a two-panel comic about a rocket car running over an unspecified quadruped

 

[mj1108]

You know, if he would have left out that his Ford Taurus was a pussy magnet his story becomes more believable.

 

[Crumpet Trumpet]

Seriously, I was exaggerating about my car. Even still, it is a great car. I have gotten lots of compliments on it.

i want to knock you down a flight of you

 

[Talon]

Shortround is a douchebag.

 

[soultron]

I have gotten lots of compliments on it.

No you didn't.

The car doesn't exist. Just like your bullshit story, OP.

 

[ChocolateCupcakes]

I'm surprised the thread got this far. I think that everyone can agree he has no chance in hell of suing this guy so OP should seriously just stop.

 

[Hey You]

You would probably have a better chance suing the guy for his dog peeing on your mailbox than this story.

 

[weekend_warrior]

lets keep this thread derail going:

 

[Stairs]

No you didn't.

The car doesn't exist. Just like your bullshit story, OP.

I don't know what the big deal is; I like my car, so what?

 

[drohne]

You know, if he would have left out that his Ford Taurus was a pussy magnet his story becomes more believable.

i'd like to say that there's nothing believable in a story about someone so preposterously dense that he negligently runs over a dog and then wants to sue its owner, but there's a thread on the first page right now about a man attempting to sue a prostitute for providing 30 minutes of illicit sex instead of the full hour, so

i guess i'll just say that the op is obviously false because its every detail is stupid and badly written

 

[FunkyPajamas]

You know, if he would have left out that his Ford Taurus was a pussy magnet his story becomes more believable.

Yup, if that were true the dog would have been chasing all the cats and wouldn't have been run over by the op.

lets keep this thread derail going:

http://www4.pic-upload.de/14.01.11/6bjxqtei48z.gif

No tongue? I can't fap to this shit.

 

[Mr. B]

How did I know this was going to be a joke post before I even opened the thread?

 

[DrForester]

So, here I am, seeking legal advice; I would have visited a lawyer already, but I can't afford it yet after paying that damn repair bill. GAF, what are my options, sue? Can I hit him with an extra emotional damage claim for damaging my precious car?

Thanks.

 

[linkboy]

Thanks, after the shitty day I'm having, I needed that.

 

[mre]

Ignore the armchair attorneys, OP. I once had a client that "accidentally" (ok, he was drunk) parked his car in his neighbor's bedroom. The same bedroom in which his (now ex) wife was having an affair with said neighbor. My client had a heart attack and was awarded a nice chunk of money to cover his medical bills, mental anguish, and the damage to his car. Oh, and his wife had to pay HIM alimony.

Find an attorney in your area that will take the case on a contingency basis. All you pay is court costs unless you win. Seriously, GAF is giving out some pretty irresponsible legal advice up in this joint.

 

[DrForester]

Ignore the armchair attorneys, OP. I once had a client that "accidentally" (ok, he was drunk) parked his car in his neighbor's bedroom. The same bedroom in which his (now ex) wife was having an affair with said neighbor. My client had a heart attack and was awarded a nice chunk of money to cover his medical bills, mental anguish, and the damage to his car. Oh, and his wife had to pay HIM alimony.

Find an attorney in your area that will take the case on a contingency basis. All you pay is court costs unless you win. Seriously, GAF is giving out some pretty irresponsible legal advice up in this joint.

 

[Dr.Palutena]

Ignore the armchair attorneys, OP. I once had a client that "accidentally" (ok, he was drunk) parked his car in his neighbor's bedroom. The same bedroom in which his (now ex) wife was having an affair with said neighbor. My client had a heart attack and was awarded a nice chunk of money to cover his medical bills, mental anguish, and the damage to his car. Oh, and his wife had to pay HIM alimony.

Find an attorney in your area that will take the case on a contingency basis. All you pay is court costs unless you win. Seriously, GAF is giving out some pretty irresponsible legal advice up in this joint.

what legal adv.. actually no no i'm not dragging my self into this ,

 

[MidnightScott]

This is a hilarious joke post XD

I hope so. If you ran over my dog OP I would fucking beat the shit out of you.

Also, a Ford Taurus is a pussy magnet? LOL

 

[big ander]

Ignore the armchair attorneys, OP. I once had a client that "accidentally" (ok, he was drunk) parked his car in his neighbor's bedroom. The same bedroom in which his (now ex) wife was having an affair with said neighbor. My client had a heart attack and was awarded a nice chunk of money to cover his medical bills, mental anguish, and the damage to his car. Oh, and his wife had to pay HIM alimony.

Find an attorney in your area that will take the case on a contingency basis. All you pay is court costs unless you win. Seriously, GAF is giving out some pretty irresponsible legal advice up in this joint.

Irresponsible legal advice, responsible moral advice. You'd be a douche for ruining it, but it's a joke topic anyway so it doesn't matter.

 

[JGS]

i want to knock you down a flight of you

laffy laffy laffy

 

[Stairs]

Ignore the armchair attorneys, OP. I once had a client that "accidentally" (ok, he was drunk) parked his car in his neighbor's bedroom. The same bedroom in which his (now ex) wife was having an affair with said neighbor. My client had a heart attack and was awarded a nice chunk of money to cover his medical bills, mental anguish, and the damage to his car. Oh, and his wife had to pay HIM alimony.

Find an attorney in your area that will take the case on a contingency basis. All you pay is court costs unless you win. Seriously, GAF is giving out some pretty irresponsible legal advice up in this joint.

Thank you, sir. I guess I was waiting for some kind of validation, because now I feel emboldened enough to pursue it.

 

[big_z]

im surprised stairs isnt banned yet. Amir0x must be taking a nap.

 

[mre]

Thank you, sir. I guess I was waiting for some kind of validation, because now I feel emboldened enough to pursue it.

Don't worry. GAF is full of chuckleheads who still put stock in notions of property rights and trespassing.

 

[Risible]

im surprised stairs isnt banned yet. Amir0x must be taking a nap.

That's exactly what I thought. I read the post, looked under his username expecting to see the "banned" tag, and then said to myself "Amirox must be sleeping or out drinking."

 

[Tapiozona]

Or maybe this is all an elaborate plan by the mod's to have a bit of troll-fun, inspired by the epic troll thread. As they ban'eth thy trolls, they may also creat'eth.

 

[santouras]

Don't worry. GAF is full of chuckleheads who still put stock in notions of property rights and trespassing.

brilliant

 

[Lionel Mandrake]

Here's the right way to deal with this.

Pretty much, as long as you strike first, you'll have the upper hand. However, you are at a disadvantage, because animal cruelty typically outweighs property destruction, the incident occurred while you were on his property, you didn't have permission to be on his property, you hit and run, you admitted you were in a rush, you tricked out a Ford Taurus, you treated the incident leisurely while on a public forum along with an ms paint picture with you destroying the dog in a gory manner while calling the dog ugly, and every other thing.

But none of that matters if you follow my instructions.

Thursday morning head down to your local courthouse and go to the department that handles automobiles and gives out tags and stuff.
Ask for a "Blue Collision Form." They'll know what you want, but if they don't tell them a CRH form, and they'll give you that. Check the bottom corner to make sure the date is still valid.
Next, arrange an appointment later in the day with the judge. If he isn't in, find any department head and claim court negligence. If you're lucky enough to get this then you've pretty much got everything covered.
If the judge is able to meet with you, go fill out the form somewhere, and then go meet with the judge.
Then the window will blast open, and it's THE MUTHA HUMPIN' GOBLIN, BOY!

Run for the hills, cause it's the Green Goblin!

Awwww yeah.

Nobody dicks around with Gobby!

.... What were we talking about?

Spoiler

OP isn't serious. I shouldn't have to be.

 

[Drewsky]

Bad troll post. Not even close.

 

[DualShadow]

Wow surprised this thread is still going :lol

 

[plasmasd]

Even still, it is a great car. I have gotten lots of compliments on it.

Only Taurus that would get a compliment would be one with Robocop in the front seat.

Even if this story was true, which its not, you could go to any junkyard and pick up a new bumper cover for $50. Doesn't matter if the paint matches, its not going to hurt the value of the vehicle.

 

[Kintaco]

I would love to see Docpan troll this douche in real life!

 

[UFRA]

Thank you, sir. I guess I was waiting for some kind of validation, because now I feel emboldened enough to pursue it.

Seriously, just leave the internets please.

 

[To Far Away Times]

Don't feed the trolls.

 

[joelseph]

I love this thread right now. Steps be cracking me up.