SlimySnake
Flashless at the Golden Globes
Took me a while to finish this because this is one boring ass game, but I have played boring games before. The story and storytelling in this game isnt just boring, it's awful from start to finish.
- Constant cheap scares with evil Alan Wake flashes on screen. After around the 100th one I was ready for this game to be over. I am not exaggerating. There are probably over a 100 of these flashes.
- Constant cuts to realtime FMVs that are poorly acted, and feel like a cheap knock off instead of an AAA game.
- Constant monologues. Alan talking to himself because has no one to talk to in his story. Saga constantly talking to herself in the mind place. People tell kojima to get an editor, someone tell Sam Lake to stop writing. Less is more.
- The meta writing a story within a story plot simply doesnt work. Again, it reeks of Sam lake thinking he's a big genius writer when it turns out he's just an amateur. Every single narrative choice he made falls flat.
- Game is like 25 hours long and has maybe 2 hours of actual combat. The rest of the time you are listening to these two protagonist talk to themselves. Sometimes Saga has cutscenes with others which are well acted and directed, but most of the time she's in her mind palace talking to others as they openly reveal to her their darkest secrets and evil plans in what is supposed to be a sinister tone, but comes across as overly robotic and laughable.
The pacing is atrocious. After the final boss fight, Saga ends up in the mind place where she talks to herself for a 30 minute sequence where you simply put up some pictures up on a caseboard. It isnt just awful gameplay, and the worst climax ive experienced in a game recently, it's also a very poor form of storytelling. it's way worse than any walking segment Sony studios have made because it goes on for what feels like 30 fucking minutes. And thats basically 90% of the game.
This is what goes for best narrative nowadays? Has the industry lost their fucking minds? 90+ metacritic, awards for best narrative, gotys. GOTYs?
P.S The ending sucked ass. They were trying to pull off a Prisoners inspired ending but failed miserably. Absolutely atrocious. In Prisoners, you know he's heard the whistle because you hear the whistle. Here, you dont hear her daughter pick up the phone. It cuts before that. Honestly, this entire game can fuck right off.
- Constant cheap scares with evil Alan Wake flashes on screen. After around the 100th one I was ready for this game to be over. I am not exaggerating. There are probably over a 100 of these flashes.
- Constant cuts to realtime FMVs that are poorly acted, and feel like a cheap knock off instead of an AAA game.
- Constant monologues. Alan talking to himself because has no one to talk to in his story. Saga constantly talking to herself in the mind place. People tell kojima to get an editor, someone tell Sam Lake to stop writing. Less is more.
- The meta writing a story within a story plot simply doesnt work. Again, it reeks of Sam lake thinking he's a big genius writer when it turns out he's just an amateur. Every single narrative choice he made falls flat.
- Game is like 25 hours long and has maybe 2 hours of actual combat. The rest of the time you are listening to these two protagonist talk to themselves. Sometimes Saga has cutscenes with others which are well acted and directed, but most of the time she's in her mind palace talking to others as they openly reveal to her their darkest secrets and evil plans in what is supposed to be a sinister tone, but comes across as overly robotic and laughable.
The pacing is atrocious. After the final boss fight, Saga ends up in the mind place where she talks to herself for a 30 minute sequence where you simply put up some pictures up on a caseboard. It isnt just awful gameplay, and the worst climax ive experienced in a game recently, it's also a very poor form of storytelling. it's way worse than any walking segment Sony studios have made because it goes on for what feels like 30 fucking minutes. And thats basically 90% of the game.
This is what goes for best narrative nowadays? Has the industry lost their fucking minds? 90+ metacritic, awards for best narrative, gotys. GOTYs?
P.S The ending sucked ass. They were trying to pull off a Prisoners inspired ending but failed miserably. Absolutely atrocious. In Prisoners, you know he's heard the whistle because you hear the whistle. Here, you dont hear her daughter pick up the phone. It cuts before that. Honestly, this entire game can fuck right off.