Mental Health |OT| Depression & Co.

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Getting that something fierce on my days off, and only alcohol seems to perk me up...and then I get sleepy from the beer and I'm at the same point where I started.

Trying to treat depression with alcohol is like trying to fix a broken glass by pounding it with a hammer.

Moderate alcohol consumption is halfway decent for social anxiety if you're with people and need not to have anxiety attacks. And if you're not on prescription medication(s) and you don't have a mixed drink with caffeine. And it doesn't always do a great job at that.

Caffeine is such a terrible thing if you have anxiety. I have switched to matcha for my occasional morning boost, as the caffeine in it is the only stuff that doesn't make me instantly melt down, and I can't have more than 1tsp a day or else I do get a little jittery anyway.

If you're in a place that it is legal, marijuana is a legit treatment for both anxiety and depression. Some people have good results with it, assuming they get the right strain for their problems.

For the record, I don't totally abstain from self-medication on really bad physical days, alcohol usually relaxes me enough that my joints stop hurting where NSAIDs usually just bounce right off, but I know my limits and I don't mix it with any pills. (And I have the same problem, if I manage to hit tipsy, I usually fall asleep right away after that.)
 
well I guess this is good bye, got my letter to my family written, got all my accounts in order. i just can't deal with this extreme loneliness and depression anymore. I dont have any friends and iv made no impact on anybody elses life. Ia
just empty on the inside.
 
well I guess this is good bye, got my letter to my family written, got all my accounts in order. i just can't deal with this extreme loneliness and depression anymore. I dont have any friends and iv made no impact on anybody elses life. Ia
just empty on the inside.

Please call the suicide hotline, 1 800-273-8255, or talk to someone, anyone before you do anything. You can PM me too. I don't know what you're going through, but I know what it's like to want to end myself. I know it's not a happy feeling at all, but I do know it's possible to get better, even if it's extremely difficult. I, and everyone else in this thread are here for you : )


Anybody here knows physics? The subject has been stressing me out, and its one of the subject I spend so much time on and yet I get no where. I've been using google and yahoo to search for answers but I knew that it won't help me in the long run. The midterm is coming soon, and I don't feel ready at all. I really hate physics, its one of those subjects I never want to take but have to.

Is it first or secons semester? I'm a second year physics major, by no means an expert, but I can definetly help out on Freshman physics, and give you some advice and stuff like that. Shoot me a PM and I'd love to help : )
 
well I guess this is good bye, got my letter to my family written, got all my accounts in order. i just can't deal with this extreme loneliness and depression anymore. I dont have any friends and iv made no impact on anybody elses life. Ia
just empty on the inside.
Please don't go. Call the number Xe4 posted above. Talk to someone.
 
Damn I have a huge complex regarding myself vs other men of my age (24)

I feel like im not a real man, can't even take care of himself, much less another person. Men of my age takes care of their gf, while for me it's the contrary, my friend takes care of me, it feels like. what does that make me.

My studies bore me, I'm just going through the motion, I have no drive on that front. I just want a masters degree, even though I have no intention of actually doing anything with it, no dreams at all.
 
I have been...up and down lately in terms of moods. Lately I have been writing down my worries, insecurities, etc onto anything I can just so it's there and I can go back to it for analytical reasons:

  • Every time I fill out applications due to being underemployed, I feel worthless when I feel like I am only good to applying for entry level positions.
  • Unrealistic scenarios in my head bring up contempt, anger, and hostility.
  • I worry about being happy and content with the choices I have made in life in regards to hobbies, interests, etc
  • Worries of permanence. This ties into my worry that nothing in my predicament will ever change.
  • That my depression is more severe than I think. This ties into days where I lack motivation and drive. Again, immediate anxiety I believe I can handle, but depression scares me.
  • I STILL compare myself to others because I am envious of their (perceived!) happiness and success.
  • I'll be alone and incapable of functioning in a relationship.

All this ties into a fear I'll never find something that i can wake up and feel excited about, whether it be careers, hobbies, relationships, etc. I don't want to just go through the motions anymore as I feel like I am being robbed of what little agency I have left.


well I guess this is good bye, got my letter to my family written, got all my accounts in order. i just can't deal with this extreme loneliness and depression anymore. I dont have any friends and iv made no impact on anybody elses life. Ia
just empty on the inside.

Shoot me a PM...please.
 
Today was a good day. Got my first exam back since I started school again for EET and got a 100%. Feels pretty good after shitty fucking grades and half-assed attempt at school back the first time around over a decade ago, and just thinking of myself as a shitty student. Also had a first meeting with the robotics club and I've somehow become the vice president, whatever that means. "Vice President of the school's robotics club" should look pretty freakin good on a resume. :) We have 8 weeks to build an autonomous robot for a competition.

I go to bed most nights nowadays feeling mentally exhausted and it's kind of great. There's a world of difference between that and going to bed depressed, hating life and dreading getting up the next day.

well I guess this is good bye, got my letter to my family written, got all my accounts in order. i just can't deal with this extreme loneliness and depression anymore. I dont have any friends and iv made no impact on anybody elses life. Ia
just empty on the inside.
I really hope you haven't done anything. I can guarantee you I've been as low as you are and that feeling of hopelessness and loneliness can be too much to bear. It can get better though with baby steps and not counting on any immediate big changes. Hell a year ago to think I'd be doing what I'm doing now? Fucking forgetaboutit.
 
well I guess this is good bye, got my letter to my family written, got all my accounts in order. i just can't deal with this extreme loneliness and depression anymore. I dont have any friends and iv made no impact on anybody elses life. Ia
just empty on the inside.

I know that feeling, but please don't do it. See this as an opportunity to at the very least make some radical change in a positive way instead of a negative one.

Also, I've been having some ridiculous automatic self defeating OCD-like behaviors lately. In response to things I feel like I fucked up on I say things out loud like someone with tourette's would and its making me feel like I'm absolutely nuts.
 
I don't know if I'm looking for help or if I'm just trying to vent or try to get a different perspective of my situation. Nor am I trying to belittle those who have real issues in their lives that are worse than mine. I don't even know if this is the right thread.

My questions is, is it possible to feel depressed over your job or profession?

Let me explain, my job is currently tied to the oilfield industry and as you are all aware off, things aren't going to well with any company in that field. Things are slow, there's nothing to do, and the days drag. Everyone here, and not just myself is wondering when our company is going to close, or if we actually will. Except, my co-workers don't seem phased by the situation. They just take it day by day and I guess they remain hopeful. Meanwhile, I'm over here bored to death wondering if I'll ever be let go, and if so when?

This brings up another perspective to my question earlier, I feel NOTHING like this at home. I have a girlfriend and she has a kid, and they mean the world to me. I look forward to seeing them every single day I get off work. You know? I look forward to spending time with them, so I don't seem to feel any negative emotions towards. I mean sure, every now and then her daughter does something that annoys me or bothers me but it's so minor and I have the patience, same thing applies to my girlfriend of course. Neither of us are perfect. The feelings I have when it comes to my job do not seem to happen at all to my personal life back at home.

Does anyone else feel this way? And how do you manage it? I guess I'm posting here today because I've been noticing that slowly, it's been starting to affect my personal life. Sometimes I don't have the patience for minor inconveniences at home, sometimes I may take something the wrong way. In other words, my mood from my job life is now starting to partially affect my work life and I'm concerned that it could get worse. What do I do?
 
Does depression cause random and crippling exhaustion? Muscle aches and joint pains?

Last weekend, out of nowhere, I got ridiculously exhausted and just slept and laid down both days. I rested up and Monday-Thursday were pretty good and then this past Friday it hit again. And I spent the weekend in bed again. More tired than I have ever been in my life. My diet and activities are the same, nothing has changed. It all came out of the blue and it hit me hard.

I slept 32 hours the past 3 nights and did nothing but lay in bed the past 2 days and I'm still tired today. Better, but still tired.

I have a doctor appointment for next Wednesday but I'm just curious if anyone has had anything similar?

I was in the middle of a bout with the "winter blues" while this happened but I get the winter blues every year.

Over my entire adult life, every time I have a medical issue my symptoms always bring up depression as a possibility but I don't feel depressed. I'm very honest with myself and I wouldn't hide it out of shame but every time I ask myself or if a doctor asks me if I am depressed I always respond with "I really don't think so".

Does depression hide itself? Is it even possible for me to know for sure?

TL;DR: Hit with random and hard-hitting exhaustion. Depression would be nice a catch-all diagnosis for exhaustion and lots of other ailments I have. I don't feel like I am depressed but possible depression keeps popping up in my life. Does depression cause random exhaustion? Can I even know for sure if I have depression?

yeah, exhaustion has been a regular thing for me since this whole thing started. I nap for 1 or 2 hours almost every day.
 
probably not the right thread but at the same time... it may be.

At the end it's all about forgiving yourself.

I made a huge mistake that will cost me let's say half my lifteime savings, which weren't much to begin with.

I wasn't victim of theft or any wrong doing by anyone, I signed a deal and the deal turned out to be the biggest nightmare ever.

Even though it's money and "I'll be fine" I am having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that the money is gone and my life is shit thanks to it.

I have been trying to forgive myself but it's hard and I've got some health issues already...

I need someone to smack me in the face and repeat a million times a day

"it's just money, it could be worse"
"it's just money, it could be worse"
"it's just money, it could be worse"
"it's just money, it could be worse"
 
Well after some truly terrible days, the last few days have been pretty great. In particular, earlier today I had a phone interview for a job out of state where I want to move and it went super well! I'm really really excited about the opportunity and my chances at getting it.
 
Anyone here on lithium? After probably half a year of trying medications my psychiatrist just put me on it.

I'm not bipolar, but I do have major depression. I'm a little worried about it since it sounds so serious.
 
Does anybody here suffer from crippling health anxiety?
For example? Do you mean hypochondria or maybe something like Münchausen or Münchausen by proxy? Or just constant worry/anxiety/panic attacks about getting ill, injured, or dying?

In answer to those, no. However, I do have IBS that seems to have a direct line to my mental stability, and having a flare can trigger intense bouts of anxiety and depression. In addition to that, I've always had anxiety related to doctors/needles/hospitals/blood. Even as young as 5 years old, according to my parents. I faint and seize (vasovagal response) in those situations rarely, and almost always if I see blood or have blood removed. Getting things put in is not quite as stressful.

The cynical part of me would like to point out that if you live in the USA, seemingly "unreasonable" panic about needing any medical or funerary attention at all is actually perfectly reasonable, due to the terrible situations and corruption surrounding both industries. It is a very easy way to go bankrupt, and it shouldn't be.

Also, Kipp! Congratulations! You deserve good things, and don't forget it!
 
Just got out of the psych ward, and now I'm on 100mg of Zoloft/Sertraline a day. Does anyone know how common and significant the loss of sexual appetite is, or how it can be prevented or dealt with?
 
Just got out of the psych ward, and now I'm on 100mg of Zoloft/Sertraline a day. Does anyone know how common and significant the loss of sexual appetite is, or how it can be prevented or dealt with?

I've been on this, and talked to a bunch of people who are also. Very important to not drink, not take any other drugs while on it without consulting your doctor (not even over the counter stuff like aspirin, acetaminophen, ibuprofen, naproxen, etc.), and be really wary of suicidal impulses while you're adjusting.

Didn't have any loss of sexual appetite, and from other people I've talked to (keeping in mind this is all anecdotal), it isn't very common to lose desire for sex altogether, it is more common to have desire somewhat reduced. Lowering the dosage you are on once you're through the adjustment period may bring your libido back up to an acceptable level. More commonly, you might not have any problems getting or maintaining an erection (assuming here that you are male), but it will become nearly impossible to achieve orgasm or have a satisfactory one. In that case, a sensitizing product, such as a gel or spray, may help. That last works for both men and women.

Good luck! It has been forever since I've been on Zoloft, but let me know if anything else I remember about it can help you out. Did they do the lower initial dose while you were in the facility?

Don't be afraid to ask to switch dose or to be put on something else if you have bad side effects, and take your time with both withdrawal and switching to something new. And most importantly, when it feels like something is finally working, keep taking it.
 
Well I finally got a job will start March 7th at a call center. Now I just need to figure out who I need to contact and inform about my new income to see how it effects my medicaid. Sure it will make me lose it.
 
Well I finally got a job will start March 7th at a call center. Now I just need to figure out who I need to contact and inform about my new income to see how it effects my medicaid. Sure it will make me lose it.
Congratulations and my condolences.
 
My anxiety has been so overwhelming lately that it's so hard to go to work and not call out of my shifts or get them covered... Ugh
 
I've been on this, and talked to a bunch of people who are also. Very important to not drink, not take any other drugs while on it without consulting your doctor (not even over the counter stuff like aspirin, acetaminophen, ibuprofen, naproxen, etc.), and be really wary of suicidal impulses while you're adjusting.

Didn't have any loss of sexual appetite, and from other people I've talked to (keeping in mind this is all anecdotal), it isn't very common to lose desire for sex altogether, it is more common to have desire somewhat reduced. Lowering the dosage you are on once you're through the adjustment period may bring your libido back up to an acceptable level. More commonly, you might not have any problems getting or maintaining an erection (assuming here that you are male), but it will become nearly impossible to achieve orgasm or have a satisfactory one. In that case, a sensitizing product, such as a gel or spray, may help. That last works for both men and women.

Good luck! It has been forever since I've been on Zoloft, but let me know if anything else I remember about it can help you out. Did they do the lower initial dose while you were in the facility?

Don't be afraid to ask to switch dose or to be put on something else if you have bad side effects, and take your time with both withdrawal and switching to something new. And most importantly, when it feels like something is finally working, keep taking it.
Alright, thank you very much. I'm really new to all this, since I haven't been on any sort of long term medication before. They did have me on 50mg for a couple of days before moving up to 100mg. Kinda wasn't sure what to expect, but I'll definitely keep all this in mind to come back to if I start noticing anything strange.
 
Could really use some help. I'll make it a bit short.

-Lost both parents young, grew up with grandparents.
-Lost sister due to encephalitis at the age of 14.
-Lost both grandparents(who took care of me).
-Can't stand my job(even though what I do is considered admirable).
-Been depressed since my early teens, hitting me harder than ever right now.
-I can't remember anything. My mind tends to forget a lot.

Any advice would be helpful. I haven't submitted myself to drinking/drugs and i'm in great physical health just my psychological health is deteriorating.
 
I finally gathered all my courage this morning and called a doctor's office for an appointment. Now I'm sitting in the waiting room and don't know what to expect.

How did it go, DKQ? I hope it went well.

I don't know if I'm looking for help or if I'm just trying to vent or try to get a different perspective of my situation. Nor am I trying to belittle those who have real issues in their lives that are worse than mine. I don't even know if this is the right thread.

My questions is, is it possible to feel depressed over your job or profession?

Let me explain, my job is currently tied to the oilfield industry and as you are all aware off, things aren't going to well with any company in that field. Things are slow, there's nothing to do, and the days drag. Everyone here, and not just myself is wondering when our company is going to close, or if we actually will. Except, my co-workers don't seem phased by the situation. They just take it day by day and I guess they remain hopeful. Meanwhile, I'm over here bored to death wondering if I'll ever be let go, and if so when?

This brings up another perspective to my question earlier, I feel NOTHING like this at home. I have a girlfriend and she has a kid, and they mean the world to me. I look forward to seeing them every single day I get off work. You know? I look forward to spending time with them, so I don't seem to feel any negative emotions towards. I mean sure, every now and then her daughter does something that annoys me or bothers me but it's so minor and I have the patience, same thing applies to my girlfriend of course. Neither of us are perfect. The feelings I have when it comes to my job do not seem to happen at all to my personal life back at home.

Does anyone else feel this way? And how do you manage it? I guess I'm posting here today because I've been noticing that slowly, it's been starting to affect my personal life. Sometimes I don't have the patience for minor inconveniences at home, sometimes I may take something the wrong way. In other words, my mood from my job life is now starting to partially affect my work life and I'm concerned that it could get worse. What do I do?

Well, depression is a sort of catch-all term for a persistent, marked low mood, and we often stretch it to mean things beyond that as well. So technically there is a certain time period precedent necessary for the label of depression, but the way you're using it is completely valid in the societal vocabulary as well.

It sounds as though you're quite dissatisfied with your job, Draconestra, and there are two angles from which one could approach such a dissatisfaction. On the one hand, it may be very illuminating and important to investigate why you don't like this job so you get a better sense of what you're looking for in your career and can better angle yourself toward something that's compatible with you. On the other hand, you may just straight up not like the job, in which case it might be best to (eventually) leave for another opportunity.

I don't think there's one specific right or wrong way to go about things, as long as you're aware of your emotional and financial needs.

probably not the right thread but at the same time... it may be.

At the end it's all about forgiving yourself.

I made a huge mistake that will cost me let's say half my lifteime savings, which weren't much to begin with.

I wasn't victim of theft or any wrong doing by anyone, I signed a deal and the deal turned out to be the biggest nightmare ever.

Even though it's money and "I'll be fine" I am having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that the money is gone and my life is shit thanks to it.

I have been trying to forgive myself but it's hard and I've got some health issues already...

I need someone to smack me in the face and repeat a million times a day

"it's just money, it could be worse"
"it's just money, it could be worse"
"it's just money, it could be worse"
"it's just money, it could be worse"

When we feel we've made a "mistake" it's often extremely difficult to forgive ourselves. Time will help, for one, as well staying in touch with how you're feeling. Have you considered journaling about your feelings of frustration?

Anyone here on lithium? After probably half a year of trying medications my psychiatrist just put me on it.

I'm not bipolar, but I do have major depression. I'm a little worried about it since it sounds so serious.

I haven't been on lithium, Graffgor, but it was considered at some point so I did some research on it. It's "serious" in the sense that you have to be vigilant about monitoring the levels in your blood, but my impression was that it's a solid choice as long as you keep up with that. Many people use it safely to great benefit!

I am perfectly happy I am through the roof with joy. lol I just also fear the loss of my support system is all but with this job will come benefits so I should have support still.

I'm glad to hear that you feel yourself making positive steps, redlegs :)

Just got out of the psych ward, and now I'm on 100mg of Zoloft/Sertraline a day. Does anyone know how common and significant the loss of sexual appetite is, or how it can be prevented or dealt with?

As always, your mileage may vary with these things. I took Zoloft at a comparable dose without issue for many years but one day the side effects started kicking in and I needed to find another option. Still, it worked well for a really long time so I can't really complain. It's definitely a good place to start!

Could really use some help. I'll make it a bit short.

-Lost both parents young, grew up with grandparents.
-Lost sister due to encephalitis at the age of 14.
-Lost both grandparents(who took care of me).
-Can't stand my job(even though what I do is considered admirable).
-Been depressed since my early teens, hitting me harder than ever right now.
-I can't remember anything. My mind tends to forget a lot.

Any advice would be helpful. I haven't submitted myself to drinking/drugs and i'm in great physical health just my psychological health is deteriorating.

That sounds like a tremendous amount of loss, Arken, and I'm sorry you've had to suffer through those experiences. Have you ever sought counseling of any kind?

<3
 
@Piano

I can't afford it. Even as a Firefighter it's very costly. Not to mention my older sister is digging herself into an early grave with the alcohol and smoking. I'll be a broken guy if I lose someone else.

Edit: Worst part is when my grandmother(pretty much my mother since she took care of me), went into cardiac arrest right in front of me. I never did CPR so hard in my life(or profession).
 
I have an obsessive need to constantly check my vitals, blood pressure, heart (I have a heart condition which makes it worse) temperature etc.

I also visit Dr Google far too often and convince myself that every single thing is something life threatening or is going to kill me.

I got that much into a panic tonight I managed to push by blood pressure up to 160/100 then I was convinced I was on my way to having a stroke.

It might seem like a joke to others but it really is crippling for me. Impossible to even use logic within myself when I get worked up, even though I know it's unreasonable and nothing bad is going to happen I still get into a bad state of panic.

I hate anxiety.

Ah, I hear you. I had to stop looking symptoms up online, it is quite easy to whip yourself into a frenzy because Dr. Internet seems to think everything is cancer. On top of that, the anxiety can have physical effects on your body, making you even more certain that something is seriously wrong. And with a preexisting heart condition, I'm sure that doesn't help.

Have you tried any coping techniques? Certain breathing methods, meditation, and practicing mindfulness can all help deal with anxiety attacks. Heck, just remembering to breathe slowly and as shallowly as you are comfortable with can help. When your breathing gets deeper and more accelerated, your body tends to interpret that as a signal to launch more adrenaline into your bloodstream, which really makes things worse for me.

I have a hard time myself isolating my anxiety induced symptoms from other, more worrying "solid" ones. Perhaps learning more about your own specific heart condition could help, so that you know what it might feel like if bad things do happen? Or setting up a routine time to check your vitals every few hours may help, instead of doing it constantly?

@Kipp - hope things calm down for you. Sounds like you're having a rougher time than usual, maybe due to the increased stress from the job hunting process?

@Arken - don't even know what to say. I'm so sorry for your losses. As for advice, there are a lot of free resources online to learn coping skills, even if you can't get proper counseling right away. Try one that you think might suit you? I'm not sure exactly what your job entails, but firefighter is a hell of a thing from what I understand. Your workplace doesn't provide any mental health resources at all?
 
Trying to treat depression with alcohol is like trying to fix a broken glass by pounding it with a hammer.

Moderate alcohol consumption is halfway decent for social anxiety if you're with people and need not to have anxiety attacks. And if you're not on prescription medication(s) and you don't have a mixed drink with caffeine. And it doesn't always do a great job at that.

Caffeine is such a terrible thing if you have anxiety. I have switched to matcha for my occasional morning boost, as the caffeine in it is the only stuff that doesn't make me instantly melt down, and I can't have more than 1tsp a day or else I do get a little jittery anyway.

If you're in a place that it is legal, marijuana is a legit treatment for both anxiety and depression. Some people have good results with it, assuming they get the right strain for their problems.

For the record, I don't totally abstain from self-medication on really bad physical days, alcohol usually relaxes me enough that my joints stop hurting where NSAIDs usually just bounce right off, but I know my limits and I don't mix it with any pills. (And I have the same problem, if I manage to hit tipsy, I usually fall asleep right away after that.)
Yeah, I know that alcohol won't do much to help. But when I keep getting scheduled two days off in a row, it's hard not to fall in to a bout of day drinking.

Weed doesn't help me that much, well it does if I recognize when to tap out but otherwise it's very easy for me to get into a bad spot. Using it as a vehicle to get to sleep is a possibility though. I think I'm gonna ask my job tomorrow for a minute to make a phone call to the employee assistance program, cuz it's not like my time is being well spent there...
ucokurJ.jpg
 
Wow what a shitty news day.

Just told i got a 3.2% raise. Even at my lowest expectations i was expecting 5%, given that they doubled my workload over the past 6 months due to people retiring/terminated and not getting replacements.

I also got a great spin of how i deserved every penny of that raise.
 
Wow what a shitty news day.

Just told i got a 3.2% raise. Even at my lowest expectations i was expecting 5%, given that they doubled my workload over the past 6 months due to people retiring/terminated and not getting replacements.

I also got a great spin of how i deserved every penny of that raise.

Sorry to hear you didn't get even the lowest expectation even. I called into job and family services earlier to report the me getting a job I'll be getting something in the mail sometime soon to tell me if anything is changing in my medical coverage.
 
I haven't been on lithium, Graffgor, but it was considered at some point so I did some research on it. It's "serious" in the sense that you have to be vigilant about monitoring the levels in your blood, but my impression was that it's a solid choice as long as you keep up with that. Many people use it safely to great benefit!
3

Thanks for the reply! He prescribed it and sent me to get a lithium level test as well, so I trust him.
 
I don't want to tell my girlfriend I have depression. I feel really down about our relationship because sometimes I'm not really sure if she genuinely likes me and I feel like a child for even thinking that way. Even worse if I was to ever ask her.
 
I don't want to tell my girlfriend I have depression. I feel really down about our relationship because sometimes I'm not really sure if she genuinely likes me and I feel like a child for even thinking that way. Even worse if I was to ever ask her.

Try to discern if that really is your depression talking, or if there could be a genuine problem with how strong your relationship is. Remember, it taints your vision/view on things, and could eventually do this to hers too, depending on the kind of person she is and what she is effected by.
 
An update for any of you that care,

I went and stayed with a friend and his wife for a few days, it was actually quite pleasant having somebody to talk to. I don't know if I am doing better i tried to use tinder to set up 3 dates but they all cancelled, One girl talked to for 3 straight days, then she called me this morning and cancelled(that stung), she said i was a really great guy(yeah right, im fucking useless). I guess i should appreciate her honesty the other two just didn't show up to the bar we were gonna met at. I guess what hurts the most was that i thought she genuinely liked me and for somebody like me, that just doesnt happen

I can't help but feel as I take a single step forward in terms of trying to met women, I go 5 steps back. I haven't gone on a proper date since i was 19(26now). The loneliness and depression are still there, but I am sure if i try to at-least be positive things will change because if not then what the fuck am i hoping for?

sorry for the bad sentences and the rambling.

Also i deleted tinder.
 
So, I don’t even know if this is a thing that belongs here. So feel free to ignore this post if it’s off topic or whatever. But:

Does anyone ever get the feeling that the people around you would just be, on the whole, better off if you weren’t around? Not in the suicidal way; I’m perfectly OK with being alive. But here lately whenever I’m with peers or work colleagues, or even my own family, I get this sense that like, “You know, these people, they don’t really need me here. I don’t really add anything with my presence. In fact, I’m kind of a drag at times. They would be having more fun/getting more done/whatever if I had just stayed home/in my room.”

Like I said, I don’t even know if this is a big deal or not. But I obviously can’t trust my own judgement on this issue, so I thought I’d ask.
 
So, I don&#8217;t even know if this is a thing that belongs here. So feel free to ignore this post if it&#8217;s off topic or whatever. But:
~snip

Figure out what's going on, then find something in your life to put your mind to and a place where your presence matters that is good/significant for you.
 
I feel the same. I am just so lost right now and my self destructive urges are reawakening. I'm screwing up in school, unable to connect with family members, and just an all around mess. I hate to start taking Effexor again but I just might have to. wtf man how am I going to make it through this life?
 
An update for any of you that care,

I went and stayed with a friend and his wife for a few days, it was actually quite pleasant having somebody to talk to. I don't know if I am doing better i tried to use tinder to set up 3 dates but they all cancelled, One girl talked to for 3 straight days, then she called me this morning and cancelled(that stung), she said i was a really great guy(yeah right, im fucking useless). I guess i should appreciate her honesty the other two just didn't show up to the bar we were gonna met at. I guess what hurts the most was that i thought she genuinely liked me and for somebody like me, that just doesnt happen

I can't help but feel as I take a single step forward in terms of trying to met women, I go 5 steps back. I haven't gone on a proper date since i was 19(26now). The loneliness and depression are still there, but I am sure if i try to at-least be positive things will change because if not then what the fuck am i hoping for?

sorry for the bad sentences and the rambling.

Also i deleted tinder.

I'm glad you didn't do anything rash with your last post being the way it was.

Trying to be in a relationship or even going on a date with someone when you're depressed can be very difficult, because it's hart to be charming or confident when you have so little confidence in yourself.

If you want to its never bad to put yourself out there, but only do it so much so that it doesn't hurt unbarably bad. Being shot down once hurts, but several times in a short time period can feel awful.

Stat strong!
 
Does anyone ever get the feeling that the people around you would just be, on the whole, better off if you weren’t around? Not in the suicidal way; I’m perfectly OK with being alive. But here lately whenever I’m with peers or work colleagues, or even my own family, I get this sense that like, “You know, these people, they don’t really need me here. I don’t really add anything with my presence. In fact, I’m kind of a drag at times. They would be having more fun/getting more done/whatever if I had just stayed home/in my room.”

Like I said, I don’t even know if this is a big deal or not. But I obviously can’t trust my own judgement on this issue, so I thought I’d ask.

I have the same feelings on a regular basis. More often than not actually when it comes to dealing with people. The only way in which I differ is that it wouldn't bother me if I were to die at any given moment. Your value to any given group can be hard thing to gauge. You can seek reassurance, but if you're anything like me, you will still have your doubts. As people can very easily and freely lie about such a thing, thinking of it as a "white lie" when it's anything but.

The only thing you can really trust is your own experiences with people. Like, is it nearly always you that initiates conversation or plans, do they give a lot more time/preference to others besides yourself, how involved they have you in a group, remarks that are made about you (more often positive than negative?) etc. Thinking about these sort of things can help you come to your own conclusions. It can be a tricky thing to remain neutral about, as emotions can distort logic at times. You could always bounce your thoughts off a neutral, trusted source if you find yourself having doubts. Hope this helps.
 
Woops. Wrong thread.

Might as well post something relevant now though:

Been really struggling still. I'm doing a bit better, but I'm still fighting off some hardcore anxiety and depression. It's been some really rough stuff.
 
Woops. Wrong thread.

Might as well post something relevant now though:

Been really struggling still. I'm doing a bit better, but I'm still fighting off some hardcore anxiety and depression. It's been some really rough stuff.

I had deep depression for around 2 years or so. I finally beat it. Only have occasional anxiety now. We'll all make it.
 
I had deep depression for around 2 years or so. I finally beat it. Only have occasional anxiety now. We'll all make it.

Hope so man, I've been this way for over 10 years and it's terrible. Each time when I feel like i'm getting closer to being over it, I lose someone and it resets.
 
Prozac is having the opposite effect for me. I'm actually feeling worse.

This isn't uncommon when starting an antidepressant or mental health drug, for a variety of reasons. If you start having vivid suicidal fantasies, impulses, or ideation, call your prescribing physician and alert them immediately. Some of these drugs are dangerous to stop cold-turkey, so they may want to taper you off with a lower dose.

If you're 25 years old or younger, I'd want to throttle the idiot that put you on it.

If you're not having any of the dangerous potential side effects, stick with it. It can take a long time to adjust to medication or to have it start working for a net positive, especially with SSRIs.

Good luck!

As for me, I'm going through an apathy phase right now. Nothing is bringing me joy. Thinking of getting rid of all my shit, at least the stuff that isn't within the last two console generations. Why kid myself? I'm never going to bust it out and play it again.
 
An update for any of you that care,

I went and stayed with a friend and his wife for a few days, it was actually quite pleasant having somebody to talk to. I don't know if I am doing better i tried to use tinder to set up 3 dates but they all cancelled, One girl talked to for 3 straight days, then she called me this morning and cancelled(that stung), she said i was a really great guy(yeah right, im fucking useless). I guess i should appreciate her honesty the other two just didn't show up to the bar we were gonna met at. I guess what hurts the most was that i thought she genuinely liked me and for somebody like me, that just doesnt happen

I can't help but feel as I take a single step forward in terms of trying to met women, I go 5 steps back. I haven't gone on a proper date since i was 19(26now). The loneliness and depression are still there, but I am sure if i try to at-least be positive things will change because if not then what the fuck am i hoping for?

sorry for the bad sentences and the rambling.

Also i deleted tinder.

First of all, I'm glad you're still with us Nastrodamous, and I'm glad you had a pleasant time with your friends.

While there are few hard and fast rules to dating there are some things I've found to be true in my experience. I don't 100% believe that one "MUST" be "WHOLE" and "COMPLETE" on their own before they can find a healthy relationship, but I've found it very true that my external relationship opportunities often reflect where I'm at internally. If I hate myself and am truly miserable a relationship very likely will not be able to "fix" these things - I'll just be miserable and hate myself while I'm in a relationship, and in my experience that has not led to successful relationships.

Lately I'm looking at dating as a constant learning process. Most of the romantic overtures I make in my life will be far from "successful" so the best I can do is learn from them. Learn about myself. Learn about where I'm at. Learn about how I feel about myself. Learn about how I can be better and healthier and more able to be in a healthy relationship. Then I can work on those things, slowly, and hopefully, slowly, become more compatible with healthy relationship circumstances.

Certainly nothing takes away the sting of rejection. Rejection sucks. But I've learned that it doesn't have to mean that I am worthless or disgusting or alone forever or anything else. It simply means that that person and me are not compatible at this point in time, and there are many reasons on both of our ends for that. I cannot cross over into their minds so I do my best to tend to the garden on my side of the fence.

So, I don’t even know if this is a thing that belongs here. So feel free to ignore this post if it’s off topic or whatever. But:

Does anyone ever get the feeling that the people around you would just be, on the whole, better off if you weren’t around? Not in the suicidal way; I’m perfectly OK with being alive. But here lately whenever I’m with peers or work colleagues, or even my own family, I get this sense that like, “You know, these people, they don’t really need me here. I don’t really add anything with my presence. In fact, I’m kind of a drag at times. They would be having more fun/getting more done/whatever if I had just stayed home/in my room.”

Like I said, I don’t even know if this is a big deal or not. But I obviously can’t trust my own judgement on this issue, so I thought I’d ask.

Yes, I've had very similar thoughts at points, JCL. It has never been accurate, in my experience, yet it's important to investigate it and see where the roots of that feeling of low worth lie. Do you have any sense of when these thoughts started or why?

I feel so miserable to the point I migbt breakdown. Is this normal?

I'm sorry you're suffering, TheAutomator. What does the misery feel like?

I feel the same. I am just so lost right now and my self destructive urges are reawakening. I'm screwing up in school, unable to connect with family members, and just an all around mess. I hate to start taking Effexor again but I just might have to. wtf man how am I going to make it through this life?

Medication is a fantastic tool to help us when we need some additional mental support getting through tough circumstances. I hope you consider the medication (alongside a medical professional) to help you with your difficulties, karasu. Was the Effexor helpful before?

Woops. Wrong thread.

Might as well post something relevant now though:

Been really struggling still. I'm doing a bit better, but I'm still fighting off some hardcore anxiety and depression. It's been some really rough stuff.

What does "fighting" anxiety and depression look like for you, Kipp?

<3
 
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