Mental Health |OT| Depression & Co.

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Hey bagels. Haul your ass to the creative writing thread. Write nonfiction if you must, but get there one of these challenges. You'd be such a cool addition. :-)
 
Bagels said:
I keep meaning to! Damn you for appealing to my massive, biblical-level ego.
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You really should. You never know. You might end up winning the damn thing! :P

It's probably healthy for the mind to have a creative outlet. But it's kinda worrisome that people do get lows through the competition though. I don't get hurt myself for not doing well, and I'm not really sure why.* But regardless, I see people feeling not so great when they do poorly in the thread [as in the results stage], and can't put into words that, they ought to enjoy reading and writing, and being read as much as anything.
*Maybe it's because I tend to focus my energy on the work at hand. I concern my self with the experience of the reader. And when that fails, I have a go at my self. Ha ha.
 
MikeDip said:
MikeDip doesn't talk to strippers and maintain a nice conversation. But today MikeDip did all of those things!
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Well that's all I was really here for. Mission accomplished. Time to pack up and go home. ;)

Ashes1396 said:
You really should. You never know. You might end up winning the damn thing! :P

It's probably healthy for the mind to have a creative outlet. But it's kinda worrisome that people do get lows through the competition though. I don't get hurt myself for not doing well, and I'm not really sure why.* But regardless, I see people feeling not so great when they do poorly in the thread [as in the results stage], and can't put into words that, they ought to enjoy reading and writing, and being read as much as anything.
*Maybe it's because I tend to focus my energy on the work at hand. I concern my self with the experience of the reader. And when that fails, I have a go at my self. Ha ha.
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I've been really meaning to participate in the competition myself but have been busy with work and school lately. Maybe if I see bgls do it, I'll know I can... easy. :p
 
Man I had an up and down weekend!

Started off great Friday night. I picked up my best friend from Penn Station after work and we walked to Best Buy theater in times square to see the Trivium and Devildriver show(and on the way had pizza). Man was it an awesome show! I haven't been to a concert in over a year so it was good to get back into it. I have another show in late October with my brother as well(Lamb of God and Killswitch Engage). Anyway, theres nothing like being bombarded with loud, angry, metal to make you forget about any anxiety or depression. Afterwards, I took my friend to my office so I could pick up my bag for weekend and headed back to Penn station. He got a nathans hotdog and put ketchup on it and I said to him "HOW DARE YOU!" Finally got home around 2am or so, but it was worth it!

Saturday kind of sucked for the most part. Got my mortgage loan documents in the mail and shit was just wrong. The purchase price listed was off by 2000 bucks, the interest rate was way too high and there were other charges that made absolutely no sense. So I was scrambling around all day trying to figure out what to do - sent out an email with questions to my lender pretty much saying "WTF is this shit?" So I was kind of moody about that all day. On top of that, I got a bill in the mail for 300 dollars for sperm storage. Before I went in for chemotherapy, I had 11 vials frozen and stored since there is a 50% chance that the chemo can make you infertile. I was supposed to get my sperm checked sometime over the summer, but I completely forgot about it. I have about a month to get it checked and then send in forms to discard the vials if its OK. If not then I owe 300 for storage, which I really cant waste on this right now due to my move coming up soon. The closest appointment I could get was october 12th so its gonna be cutting it REALLY close. I've been so damn stressed out over everything. October is gonna be a balancing act since theres so much stuff going on.

-My brothers wedding takes up a whole weekend, 19th, 20th, 21st
-Doctors appt on the 12th
-Have to meet up with the seller to make a deal on current furniture in the place I'm moving to
-Have to find out when the official closing date is
-Have to have the maintenance people of the condo complex do their own inspection a week prior to the closing date

I have to do all of the above for the most part on weekends since I dont have time during the week because of work.

I'm honestly surprised my head hasn't exploded already from all the stress that I've been under since early August. Can someone give me a massage or something?
 
I'm going to start praying to St. Bagels from now on.

St. Bagels, if you can hear me, please give me a lot of money. Thank you.

Your loyal follower, MikeDip.
 
Ashes1396 said:
Have you spoken to someone of a professional capacity?
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yeah but medication and ECT are not helping too much it seems. i wish i could talk to my therapist daily but i feel like i'm a pest when i call her, which i did three times this past week, so much.

i just have this feeling in my gut that i'm gonna kill myself and just haven't figured out the how or when yet, like i haven't had that final pushing event or moment
 
You're not a pest for needing to share these things. Call everyday, yell, scream, jump up and down, wear funny hats but don't think you don't deserve to be heard. Tell her exactly what you posted. If not her, someone else.
 
Curtisaur said:
yeah but medication and ECT are not helping too much it seems. i wish i could talk to my therapist daily but i feel like i'm a pest when i call her, which i did three times this past week, so much.

i just have this feeling in my gut that i'm gonna kill myself and just haven't figured out the how or when yet, like i haven't had that final pushing event or moment
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I believe, and someone can correct me if I am wrong, but ECT means that you're at the very serious end. So I think you should call your therapist. Have you talked about strategies to deal with when you do have such thoughts? Like writing down your thoughts? Or changing behavioral routines?
 
AvRL4r1.jpg
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-if thou suffereth from a mental affliction, calleth forth an actual doctore.

-blessed be WilsonGT, for from the mouths of clams shall come much wisdom and stuff and things.

-does anyone on depression-GAF have leprosy? No? Well you're FUCKING WELCOME.

SfliVwL.jpg
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-I am not sure I'm too happy about this.

-does that...count as a miracle? No? Come on!

-Good Lord am I wasted.

tHsWAwH.jpg
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-wait. do clams even have mouths? I think I screwed that up.

-he who puteth ketchupe upon thine hotedogge hast surely sinned in the eyes of the Lord God, who is also Jehovah, and I do not meaneth the one fromme Final Fantasy.

-fuck. Don't write the really racist stuff in my book of saying, okay?
 
Femmeworth said:
St. Bagels is alright, minus the whole religion angle.

On an unrelated note, I started corresponding with someone through a dating website.
ibrm22bw0fEBOe.gif
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The "religious angle" is that he wears a bishop's mitre, but that's mainly to pick up the ladies.


Love the gif!
 
Wait, Bagels, you're a patron of the Great Whore of Rome? Damn, I'll have to reevaluate my participation in this thread.

Just bustin' ur beads :D
 
Bagels said:
Blessings right in your stupid face. - St. Bagels
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Where the hell is my money? My faith is slowly fading. Skip the blessings and send me a check or something.

Your loyal follower, MikeDip


Also, congrats femme! I know it's scary but it's so awesome. I wish you the best of luck.
 
humbugs said:
Simeon the Holy Fool

Patron of puppeteers, and general tomfoolery.

The appeal of this gentleperson need not be stated.

Sure, he feigned madness, extinguished lights in churches, threw things at people, and got up to all sorts of wacky antics. Dude, however, was an all round charmer, with his self-deprecating ways and not creepy in the slightest hand puppet.

Another hermit in the pantheon. May or may not have had an arrangement with....
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And here I thought St Bagels was the Holy Fool, I guess there is always room for another.
 
So we finally, finally got around to doing one of these, after talking about it forever. Please, please, please let me know if this or is not of any value to you. If it is, we can definitely do more of them, and maybe even with a way for folks to participate live! And if not participate live, there will definitely be ways for you to join a revolving cast for a topic you'd like to talk about.

I already have many different people on board to do a bunch of different kinds of shows. We can do more of a free-for-all style thing as well as shows on specific topics, interviews - whatever people want. Ideas that have been thrown around have included the very general - depression, anxiety, relationships, therapy, antidepressants - the way more specific - cancer and depression - and topics in between - creativity and mental illness, bullying, mental illness and religion, Insomnia.

We sort of hope that a) the shows are of value, b) they're entertaining, and c) it fosters a better sense of community as you hear our voices, contribute your own (which seems scary to a lot of people!), and get a better sense for the personalities of the posters in here.

Please don't make fun of my voice. :(

Information on future shows, calls for participants, etc., will go up on our twitter account - @depressionGAF, as well as being talked about here, I'm sure.


Depression-GAF Podcast - CLICK ME!
Episode #1 - Side Effects
w/ Bagels, ClassyPenguin, and Niamh!

What are the common side effects of common psych meds? Do they get better? How do you handle them? Can you pick meds to limit your side effects?

As always, the information provided is not meant to substitute for actual medical advice and reflects our own views and crap.

We hope it encourages some discussion here in the thread! There is a lot to say about side effects of medications.

Let me know what you think, keeping in mind that it's our first one. So please be kind, you jackals. :P

Links of interest:

Using Side Effects to Tailor Antidepressant Therapy
 
Cut myself...awesome.

Edit: I gotta stop posting shit...

Edit1: As regards to your podcast, I couldn't hear most of it. Classy/niamh/Bagels please invest in better mics. It was tough to hear at times and there was annoying clicks I just couldn't get over.

Edit2: I want to fucking sleep for once and now I can't, awesome...
 
I lost internet again for a day and a half, but I am back online and wanted to post something:

JB:

I love you man. I am so, so sorry you are going through this. I've talked to you before about my husband going through the same thing, and his is progressing as well. The shocks, the stomach issues, everything. Again, it makes me wonder if doctors don't just slap the label of 'fibromyalgia' on stuff they have decided they can't figure out. And then other doctors just see that and agree with it. It makes me mad. I wish I could be there for you and help you. You are such a lovely person, with a wonderful soul and heart and why couldn't this happen to an asshole?

Bagels:
I am not religious. Not really. I guess I am pagan atheist: I believe if there is anything like a higher power or powers, it's not sentient. It makes no sense I know.

THAT SAID: My favorite 'prayer', one I try to live my life by without the religious connotation, is The Prayer of St. Francis, which, oddly enough, isn't actually connected to St. Francis, but whatever! This, in combination with my personal motto of 'If nothing we do matters, all that matters is what we do.' makes for a great combination.

Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace;
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is error, the truth;
Where there is doubt, the faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
And where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master, Grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled, as to console;
To be understood, as to understand;
To be loved as to love.
For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
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Adding a link to it in song form, cause that's awesome.
 
Fiction said:
THAT SAID: My favorite 'prayer', one I try to live my life by without the religious connotation, is The Prayer of St. Francis, which, oddly enough, isn't actually connected to St. Francis, but whatever!
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Huh. I remember singing this in church. Maybe I'll sing it for you on the podcast. :O
 
Notrollious said:
Adding to favorite prayers, like Fiction, I am fairly atheistic but damnit if this one doesn't get me in its song form.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gW_z7MfeWA

Baba Yetu (The Lords Prayer in Swahili) done by Christopher Tin

Best goddamned intro music in a game ever. (Civilization 4)
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That is so pretty. I love music in languages like that.

Sorta like the chorus to this song. I love it. I have no idea what it means.
 
MikeDip made me promise to suffer through listening to my own voice on the podcast, so I'm doing that now. There is some popping when I speak, but the voices are all super clear to me. I hope other people can hear it okay? If you can suffer through any amount of it, please let me know if this is of any use! Any comments on format, topic, having more/fewer guests, me talking too much, if it's too dry or if my little jokes are too distracting - really the content and presentation - would be so appreciated I could kiss you.

Pwease?

:'(
 
Fiction said:
JB:

I love you man. I am so, so sorry you are going through this. I've talked to you before about my husband going through the same thing, and his is progressing as well. The shocks, the stomach issues, everything. Again, it makes me wonder if doctors don't just slap the label of 'fibromyalgia' on stuff they have decided they can't figure out. And then other doctors just see that and agree with it. It makes me mad. I wish I could be there for you and help you. You are such a lovely person, with a wonderful soul and heart and why couldn't this happen to an asshole?
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I know, right? It's always the good ones. You never hear about serial killers getting nasty diseases. ;)

Part of me goes back and forth on the labeling of fibromyalgia and the frustration of not having a definitive test to give doctors more to work with. On the other hand, I'd rather have SOME label so I can at least tell friends and family I have something and there's good evidence things are seriously wrong with the body in fibro. It can be very easy for people to think that I'm making it all up (well, maybe not that easy if they saw the way I actually am forced to live but I keep people at arm's length for a reason).

It's important to hope for better treatments on the horizon. Whether they'll be out there or not isn't relevant. I just have to hope. Otherwise, there's nothing that keeps me going, aside from the feeling that people need me.

*hugs*
 
Bagels had the clearest mic, then Penguin, then Niamh. The distance made conversations slow down since there were always long pauses with people trying to work out if it was their turn to speak etc. Can't really avoid this since it's intrinsic to doing podcasts with people who aren't in the same location.

The joke at 20mins was good but the comedic timing got ruined by the latency.

I think I can hear feedback or whatever it's called, hearing the sound coming out of someone's speakers picked up by their mic and retransmitted.

Fairly interesting overall. Bagels did talk a lot but it wasn't bothersome. Feels like he's the host.

Need to work on signoffs!
 
ThoseDeafMutes said:
Bagels had the clearest mic, then Penguin, then Niamh. The distance made conversations slow down since there were always long pauses with people trying to work out if it was their turn to speak etc. Can't really avoid this since it's intrinsic to doing podcasts with people who aren't in the same location.

The joke at 20mins was good but the comedic timing got ruined by the latency.

I think I can hear feedback or whatever it's called, hearing the sound coming out of someone's speakers picked up by their mic and retransmitted.

Fairly interesting overall. Bagels did talk a lot but it wasn't bothersome. Feels like he's the host.

Need to work on signoffs!
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Thanks for taking the time to listen and comment! Penguin offered to do more editing, but I pushed for just posting it if it sounded okay and there weren't huge periods that we knew we'd need to edit. I've been trying to get this started for months, so when I had the other folks and we had an outline, I just wanted to do it and get it out the door. The audio quality should improve and as nerves quiet and I get better at this, it'll hopefully be less person talks...*pause*...person talks....*pause*...

If we do more of these, the guests will change every time, but as of now, I will indeed be the host. The issue being that I talk way too much. I'll shut up more in the future, but I'm also hoping I can twist some arms to get other people to take over as hosts for future shows. I'd like this to be a reflection of all of the different people in the community more than the "Bagels' Vanity Radio Hour." The shows can be sponsored by my massive ego, but I'm not sure anyone is going to want to be subjected to it with any more frequency than they already put up with me here.

I was surprised as anyone to learn that we hadn't figured out a way to end the show. I blew a couple of good chances to end it. That'll be better next time.
 
ThoseDeafMutes said:
Bagels had the clearest mic, then Penguin, then Niamh. The distance made conversations slow down since there were always long pauses with people trying to work out if it was their turn to speak etc. Can't really avoid this since it's intrinsic to doing podcasts with people who aren't in the same location.

The joke at 20mins was good but the comedic timing got ruined by the latency.

I think I can hear feedback or whatever it's called, hearing the sound coming out of someone's speakers picked up by their mic and retransmitted.

Fairly interesting overall. Bagels did talk a lot but it wasn't bothersome. Feels like he's the host.

Need to work on signoffs!
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Thanks. Yeah, I think mumble might not be the best for audio quality. I think Autoblog uses Skype to record and I hold them as a standard of people in different places podcast. It is our first, so of course it's going to be a bit awkward and uncomfortable.

Bagels is certainty the host. This is is a trial run so, more constructive criticism please.


Also, what bagels said above.
 
ClassyPenguin said:
Thanks. Yeah, I think mumble might not be the best for audio quality. I think Autoblog uses Skype to record and I hold them as a standard of people in different places podcast. It is our first, so of course it's going to be a bit awkward and uncomfortable.

Bagels is certainty the host. This is is a trial run so, more constructive criticism please.


Also, what bagels said above.
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And please, don't just tell me it was a mistake to let ClassyPenguin on the show. It's obvious, in retrospect, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. :P
 
ClassyPenguin said:
Boo this man.

I'm really scatter-brained when it comes to voicing my opinion. I really work better with text, but I like the challenge.
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The phrase "slurpy nurps" is going to be the main thing I take away from this project, so you proved your worth many times over.
 
Notrollious said:
Adding to favorite prayers, like Fiction, I am fairly atheistic but damnit if this one doesn't get me in its song form.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6gW_z7MfeWA

Baba Yetu (The Lords Prayer in Swahili) done by Christopher Tin

Best goddamned intro music in a game ever. (Civilization 4)
Click to expand...

Loovvveee Civ music. IV and V's soundtracks are probably one of the main things that draw me back to them.


Bagels said:
The phrase "slurpy nurps" is going to be the main thing I take away from this project, so you proved your worth many times over.
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I feel bad for stone-walling your humour attempts sometimes. You got me to put my serious face on for the podcast, then threw me off with unexpected silliness. Hopefully I'll respond more amiably if you ever have me back. :p
 
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